Please, no one make a play on the word “Country” and “C-U-Next-Tuesday” please. The trailer for Gwyneth Paltrow’s new film, Country Strong, was just released and it is… ugh. I mean, I was a bit startled because it’s been a while since I’ve seen Gwyneth “act.” I still haven’t seen Iron Man 2, so my only exposure to Goopy lately has been through photos and Goop newsletters. So, she’s “acting” as a country music singer who is struggling with alcoholism and a crappy marriage and a comeback and a young All About Eve-esque upstart (Leighton Meester) who seems to be angling for Goopy’s career and her marriage. Here’s the trailer:

First, what I like: Gwyneth is singing her own songs, and good for her. Her voice is stronger than most pop stars, and she doesn’t sound bad, at all. Also, the ensemble looks interesting – Tim McGraw is turning into a solid supporting actor, Leighton Meester finally gets an interesting part, and the younger dude, Garrett Hedlund is an up-and-comer who looks pretty hot. What I don’t like… ugh, so much. Goopy’s “hick” Southern accent sounds so cheesy. I hate when Yankees do that fakey Southern twang, like every Southerner sounds like Britney Spears. It’s not the case, at all. No one ever tries to do a classy Southern accent anymore. Secondly, I’ll have to see it to be sure, but I’m not buying Goopy’s “lush” scenes. No self-respecting lush just stands beside the bed throwing things. A real lush climbs into bed, starts sobbing and picks up the phone to start drunk-dialing, for real.

But the main problem I have with this is a story problem: at one point, McGraw’s character, the husband/manager I suppose, seems to be saying that this is the country singer’s “last chance.” Now, if she was an alcoholic pop star who got a D.U.I., that might be the case. But she’s a country music star – the country music fan base would be perfectly able to “forgive” one of their stars if she was a lush. They will forgive anything as long as the singer doesn’t try to go mainstream and “forget her roots.” True story.