It’s pretty clear exactly which magazines Papa Joe Simpson is friendly with – and even more clear who he isn’t. Though People published an article questioning whether Tony Romo had really dumped Jessica Simpson – after all he did go to Ashlee’s wedding and was supposedly very sweet to Jessica all night – US Weekly is gloating that Jess had to go on vacation all alone with her parents yesterday. And it really does seem like they’re gloating; they’re enjoying her supposedly sorry state way too much.

Tony Romo may have joined Jessica Simpson for pregnant sister Ashlee’s Saturday wedding — but he skipped out on a family vacation with her the next day. On Sunday, Jessica and her parents Joe and Tina hopped a private jet for some R&R in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, amidst reports that she and Romo had split.

(Jessica, who toted her dog Daisy on the tarmac, doesn’t seem to have relationship luck in Cabo. After a teary 2007 trip there with John Mayer — who’s currently dating Jennifer Aniston — the pair called it quits.) On Friday, Usmagazine.com reported that Joe begged Romo to attend Ashlee’s wedding “to support the family.”

That same day, Jessica and Tony were spotted lunching at sushi restaurant Katsuya in L.A. It was the first time they’d been photographed together in three weeks. So are they really over? “He’s broken up with her before, but I don’t know if they’ll get back together this time,” a source tells Us. Read more about Jessica’s disastrous love life — including her terrifying obsession with Mayer’s romance with Aniston — in the current issue of Us Weekly, on newsstands now.

[From Us Weekly]

Us ends most of their articles with some plea to buy their print edition, and I don’t normally leave that in the excerpt. But the phrasing was so funny and really proves my point. They’re really enjoying framing Jessica in the most pathetic and desperate light possible. And it may be totally true – really we’re not there, we don’t know – but they sure have fun with their adjectives.

People, in contrast, brags about Jessica and Tony’s PDA at Ashlee’s wedding. Something tells me the truth probably lays somewhere between Jessica being totally pathetic and Tony Romo shoving his tongue down her throat. Probably.

What’s going on with Jessica Simpson and Tony Romo? While rumors of a split continue to swirl, the two attended Ashlee Simpson’s private weekend nuptials – looking anything but broken up. “They were very cozy and cute together,” [at Ashlee’s rehearsal dinner ]said a source close to the couple, slamming Internet reports that Simpson was devastated to learn that her ex, John Mayer, has taken up with Jennifer Aniston. “She’s definitely not mourning John Mayer! She was in an amazing mood and so happy her sister was getting married.”

As for Saturday’s wedding and Alice In Wonderland-themed reception, Romo continued to shower the elder Simpson, 27, with attention, said the source. “They were kissing and holding hands throughout the night,” added the insider. “He was very sweet to her. They were very much a couple.” For the record, Jessica’s rep, Cindi Berger, has called the breakup talk “not true.”

[From People]

So for the record, Jessica Simpson is either as happy and in love as she’s ever been, or totally pathetically desperate and has little cut-outs of John Mayer’s head littering her home. And she’s either going to spend the rest of her life going on vacation with her parents until the sweet release of death, or she’s a total rock star with a killer love life. Between the two magazines, People is generally the more reputable – though in this case they might be a little hopefully naive.

Here’s Jessica and Tony arriving several hours early for Ashlee’s wedding. Note the body language. Images thanks to Splash.