As we talked about last Friday, Gwyneth Paltrow deigned to appear on Who Do You Think You Are?, that show about celebrities tracing their genealogy. The promos made it sound like Gwyneth’s ancestors were all, obviously, better than all of our ancestors. Like, her ancestors were all Kabbalah holy men and scholars. Anyway, the full episode is online now, in case you missed it – go here to watch. Gwyneth’s episode was a lot like all of the other episodes (sob!) – Gwyneth found out she had some cool ancestors, and some not-so-cool peasant ancestry. On her mother’s side, she’s descended from peasanty seamstresses who traveled from Barbados to America because they were being run out of town by the newly freed slaves. On her father’s side, Gwyneth has some unfit mothers in the mix. What I kind of loved was that Gwyneth’s styling changed with each new revelation – like, she had a costume change every few minutes, she styled her hair in all of these different ways, and the lighting on her was always beautiful. Having just recently seen the Steve Buscemi episode, I can tell you that not every celebrity gets that kind of styling and treatment.
In other Goop news, her cookbook is coming out soon and there are still rumors going around that she’s going to be launching some kind of Goop magazine. The latest news comes via Page Six:
Gwyneth Paltrow’s quest to become the next Martha Stewart may be closer in sight. Sources say the culinarily inclined star was shot in London for the June cover of Bon Appetit, posing for a cooking and entertaining feature for the Condé Nast title. The Post’s Keith Kelly reported last week that Paltrow, who runs foodie lifestyle Web site Goop.com, is cooking up a food magazine with publishing powerhouse Hearst. Paltrow has a cookbook out next month, “My Father’s Daughter.” A rep for Bon Appetit would not confirm its June cover.
[From Page Six]
You know what is kind of stunning to me? That Goopy has positioned herself as a “foodie”. Now everybody is saying it, and people don’t even blink when she’s referred to as a “foodie” in casual reporting. The bitch is always on a juice fast! And roasting a chicken does not make you a foodie!
Photos courtesy of WENN.
I’ve been looking deeper into my ancestry and I can’t confirm it yet but my ggg grandfather might have been a Cusack. Gosh, to think I might be John’s long lost bastard step sister.
Well, I’m not surprised Gwyneth has some lowly peasants in her genealogy. Thanks for mentioning about the various “styling changes,” which, of course, reminds me of the perfectionistic narcissist SHE IS. I wouldn’t waste my time watching her on that show…so thanks for clueing us in on her ever-evolving narcissism, which doesn’t shock. Gwyneth the next Martha?? MAYBE…she’s probably as much a control freak as Martha is…yeah..I can see it…in a not so flattering way…LOL.
Maybe Steve Buscemi could care less about the styling and lighting and more about his ancesters. Goop is such a diva.
I just want to say that I love Steve Buscemi and didn’t know he was on that show. I will watch it tonight on my laptop.
And there is really only so much styling can do for Steve. : )
This show is a guilty pleasure of mine too. I thought the Buscemi episode was shot beautifully too in its own right –it being very dark, looking like they upped the contrast to make the place where his ancestor contemplated (or faked?) suicide more ominous.
Let’s be honest-Styling for Steve would be like lipstick on a pig.
Rita, can you introduce me to John? Mr. Tarheel flew off to AZ for some conference so I have a few days of loneliness to fill. It’s not like I’m going to jump him-just lookin’ to enjoy the eye candy.
I saw the show with Steve Buscemi…and guess what? One of his ancestors was a dentist! Steve even had to laugh at that discovery…LOL
I can see her being a foodie. You don’t have to be fat to be a foodie. And you can be obsessed with food but not eat it. You just watch everyone else eating it. And then you go and stick your fingers down your throat. Or cut the 1 1/2 oz of food on your own plate into tiny little pieces and push it around as if you are actually eating it. Lucky for me, I am not a foodie. I just like to eat and that doesn’t need a label.
So, I guess I should have watched, because I am stymied by how all this Barbados-peasant and Jewish mystic ancestry results in a fair-skinned, blue eyed waifish person. Help? Were the peasants European colonists? Where were the mystics from?
She still irritates me badly….although this dress is one of her better choices…..her taste in clothing is bad…..and she’s “cultivated” all her style from others.
I LOVED the Steve Buscemi episode! He was so great. Steve Buscemi for HGF??
I refused to watch the Goop episode.
LMAO, LindaR.
TQB- Gwyneth wears blue contacts and her natural hair color is dark brown.
http://www.handbag.com/cm/handbaguk/images/Ib/or_1f9f572e121379701829864.jpg
http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_c5Sc2jHucsw/ShsB0werS4I/AAAAAAAAYhE/lcd7tryosNo/s400/2dwgie0.jpg
She’s also had a very obvious nose job. It’s amusing how someone who loves to tout her Jewish heritage has basically physically erased it all. But I would love to know what kind of contacts she uses, they’re SO natural looking.
The Barbados ancestors (sisters)were European and left the island when the slaves were freed. They knew they couldn’t earn a decent living as seamstresses/milliners with the freed women competing for the same jobs and earning less money. The Jewish ancestors were from Eastern Europe, Poland, I believe. They were into Kabbalah so, of course, that made Miss Goopie very happy since she considers herself to be a “deeply spiritual” person.
Never been a fan of hers…EVER. I watch “Who Do You Think You Are?” every week because it’s really interesting (Kim Cattrall’s ep was great), but struggled to sit through GOOP’s episode. She still came across as snooty and boorish, and while her ancestry is intriguing, she herself is NOT.
And TQB: I have Native American and Scottish ancestry, and look as WASPy as anyone—I can’t even tan with a spray-on! Sometimes you can’t tell someone’s heritage based on physical appearance.
All its pretension and new-life mantra aside, I love GOOP. It’s a free electronic read on something semi-substantial.
My inner budget bitch can’t hate.
@Kazoo: I don’t know what is up with that old picture, but I think it’s pretty safe to say she has blue eyes. Blue contacts are pretty easy to spot on someone who has naturally dark eyes, because they look TOO blue (eg. Paris Hilton).
celebrity ancestry? omg WHO would watch that??? I don’t even care about my OWN ancestry
teehee.. peasant blood.
@Kazoo I also don’t think she wears contacts. I have seen many people who’s eye color changes in different light so one picture where her eyes look darker means nothing. And hair dye isn’t a big deal either, also most actresses have nose jobs I almost don’t consider it plastic surgery….(Not that Goopy hasn’t been doing some other tweaks lately)
Hmm, maybe you guys are right. But in every picture I’ve seen of her as a child/teenager, she looks like she has brown eyes. And I know eye color can look different depending on lighting and other things, but I’ve never mistaken dark brown eyes for blue ones. LOL.
the only peasant blood goopy is in contact with is the peasant blood/unicorn tears concoction she bathes in under a full moon to stay famous.
Ok I gotta ask what in the world is a “foodie”?
My appreciation for Steve Buschemi deepened.
I wanna see Goopster go on Top Chef. They’ll cut a bitch.
Nice photo research, Kazoo! In fact, you could see in the episode that her roots are the sandy-light-brown color of your second photo.
You can add to the signs of self-loathing: her obsessive hair-straightening. Another way to iron out her much-beloved antecedents.
marie- basically a food nerd.
Sigh…. My ancestor were so much more exciting then poor Goopy.
And how does she function on just juice?
I can’t imagine going through the torture of wearing contacts to change your eye color for fun. But I guess it’s not as bad as some things people do to their bodies in the name of beauty.
Meanwhile, may I say that plenty of Jews have blue eyes. Paul Newman, anyone? As for nose jobs, no special heritage required.
Gwyneth totally is a foodie… well at least a nerd about food. She did some kind of movie thing with that friend of hers who is a famous chef… I don’t remember the name. They went to Spain (and I actually saw it aired on tv here in Spain) and visited all these random parts of the country tasting all these different dishes. I only watched a few minutes but she sure did seem to enjoy her food.
I love that header picture. It’s so reassuring to me that, while spending half her time in macrobiotic spas and living on a constant detox juice diet, even Her Majesty gets pimples. Check out the juicy little proletarian zits on the temple there – aw, human after all.
Bless.
crazydaisy, i was relating her specific Jewish ancestry, her father’s family, not all Jews of the world.
Okay, a superskinny actress, who last year was told by a doctor that she had the body of a 70-year-old because of poor nutrition, has a cookbook? What’s it called – “How to Age Rapidly, Starve Yourself and Die Young”?
She has a horrible complexion in that first pic. You’d think her skin would be clear as can be with all that macrobiotic food she supposedly eats. Guess she doesn’t want to jump on the Proactive bandwagon.
Yeah, you might have to look at Kim Cattrall’s or Brooke Shields’s episode for comparison.
Buscemi just doesn’t get better with styling and lighting changes.
I didn’t even read the posting yet just had to comment on how hard I chortled on the title LOL
YES! there have been peasant immigrants to the caribbean, from europe!
They were not colonialists….but poor folks trying to make a decent living, and were often encouraged to go to colonial outposts to do menial labor and farming, etc. by the colonial powers-that-be….
The french caribbean, africa, australia!!! and the US have all seen this.
Many ancestors in former colonial outposts do not come from a moneyed background; and they were not living high off the hog and elite when they immigrated. Even today, many of their ancestral offspring are decidedly middle class. Sure, they may own land or a farm, but they are not super wealthy. There is an image that every land owner in africa, for example, who comes from colonial roots, must have come from rich and powerful roots. Not for everyone.
The powers that be always need a middle class/worker class, even if they had slaves in addition.
Paul Newman’s father was Jewish, his mother Catholic so under Jewish law he’s not Jewish. He never converted. Not Jewish. Chose to identify as Jewish because it was more “challenging,” that doesn’t make him Jewish. That makes him sound like the same kind of tool that Paltrow is.
Kaiser, I love it when you use that header pic because it reminds us all that Goop gets pimples too. What a peasant affliction!
@Rita, Joan Cusack seems like she would be a blast to be around, she has such a cute personality.
GOOPYZITS! Maybe she will put out some advice on how to properly pop them!
definition of goop- (Dictionary.com)
1. A bad-mannered or inconsiderate person; clod; boor.
3. A sticky wet viscous substance
LOL 🙂
I ne’er realised before just how bad her complexion is… and, she really does not know how to dress herself.
Oh, and I think one is only considered Jewish if their MOTHER is Jewish (or converted priour to their birth) or if they themselves convert (a la Liz Taylor). I don’t think either applies in Goopy’s case.
The Goop inwardly is very insecure unhappy woman. She obviously has been given a sence of entitlement since birth and is delusional in thinking that her lineage was profoundly unique.
Who Do You Think You Are is a wonderful TV show that I continue to enjoy. However having to watch The Goop this past week with her pretencious attitude and superior manner was beyond embarassing. The woman doesn’t have an ounce of sincerity or compassion in her being. She is really not a good actress !! Dear me…what will come of her??
That top pick isnt the best. She has wrinkles AND zits.
Oiy vey!
@ Kazoo – I have naturally blue eyes and sometimes in pictures taken in poor lighting without a flash believe me they can look dark brown. Paris Hilton’s natural eye color also isn’t brown, but more of a greyish/hazelish blue rather than the bright blue contacts she usually wears.
Point 1.) Gwyneth did do the PBS foodie show On The Road… Spain! Where she and Mario Batali road tripped across the Iberian Penninsula sampling the regional cuisine. She ate everything, tried every bizarre concotion. Mario even said she has a good palate. Basically, Goopy does have some foodie street cred.
Point 2.) They let Gwyneth pick and choose which ancestors she wanted to research. She chose one family member she thought was from Barbados, and she got herself a vacation to Barbados. Her mother has some pretty well-known ancestry too; well known musicians, and Quakers. They let Gwyneth pick and choose, so she flew off to Barbados with a hair and makeup crew for the taping of this show, and turned it into a family vacation. (Now we know how those Bikini pics from a few weeks ago got out. We knew it was someone in Gwynnie’s camp, because Chris & the kids were reported as being there, but nobody got a picture of Chris)
@alex: I don’t know what episode you watched, but I didn’t see any pretentious or snobby behavior whatsoever. She seemed very interested in the information given, asked questions, listened well, deferred to everyone’s expertise, and appeared genuinely grateful. The conversation she had with her mother at the end I thought was very sweet. People just want to hate on her so badly they’ll read into anything.
People of Jewish descent comes in all colors, shapes and sizes. I’m half-Jewish like Goopy (my father is a Jew whose grandparents escaped from Russia), but he was blond and blue-eyed, and I’m a redhead with blue-green eyes. Red hair is recessive, so it’s in the Russian-Jewish line somewhere. Dyeing one’s hair shouldn’t be considered trying to ‘erase’ one’s ‘Jewishness.’ Oh, and I flat-iron my hair, too. I guess I hate myself. Damnit.
Notice the “pimples” are in a row. I’m totally going to pretend they’re flea bites.
Are we sure those are zits and not where she was injected with botox?
annie, interesting! i didn’t know that.
scarlet, LOL. way to take a comment out of context.
I don’t think she wears contacts. I have hazel eyes, but first thing in the morning, or when I cry, they turn bright green. And you can always change the colour of your eyes just by applying certain colours of eye makeup.
There is a good chance she comes from white slaves. Barbados was using white and black slavery. And it is weird how they did not dig further as her relative that left was not the first one born in Barbados it mentions that woman’s parents being born there also. The slaves had been emancipated 30 years prior to her 18 year old relative leaving Barbados.
It was only around the time that the 18 year old left. that freed whites were no longer allowed to work due to not being black. This would have been a very good history lesson. But it just doesn’t fit with what everyone has been taught.
@Scarlett Vixen: I have to agree with you. I’m not a fan of Goopy but I didn’t find her behavior offensive. After reading Celebitchy, I thought the “jewish” thing would be over the top on the show. To me it just seemed like she felt a connection because she studies Kabballah.
Kaiser you always nail it “…ancestors, obviously, better than all our ancestors”. The peasant title killed me. Seamstress? She must have been peeved! Love your work.
Plenty of full Jews have amazing blue eyes. Logan Lerman, 100% Jew, for example.