Linnocent is no stranger to “leaking”. That sounded dirtier (and grosser) than I meant. What I meant was that Linnocent sits around, doing lines and downing shots, and she gets bored, so she decides to manufacture some drama by “leaking” some BS story about herself. At this point, TMZ is pretty much the only media outlet buying Linnocent’s crack musings on demand. Even Radar and the New York tabloids (the Daily News, the Post) aim higher for their sourcing. My point? This latest Linnocent story at TMZ is especially hilarious when you consider that its origin was probably Linnocent and her enablers, coked out of their skulls:
Lindsay Lohan plans to stay on the straight and narrow for the REST OF HER LIFE — telling friends, she’s serious this time … no drugs, no booze, no breaking the law … ever again … PERIOD.
Sources close to Lindsay tell TMZ, the actress had an epiphany after her sentencing — and is completely at peace with the judge’s decision … community service, fines, counseling, shoplifters alternative class … the whole package.
Technically, Lindsay is REQUIRED to stay sober during her formal probation — which ends after she completes her 480 hours of community service — but we’re told, it doesn’t matter … Lindsay’s committed to sobriety for the long haul.
One thing … Lindsay does take issue with the three-year probation itself — telling friends she doesn’t think she deserves it — but que sera sera … she has learned to accept her fate.
Bottom line — her friends are adamant … Lindsay has learned her lesson once and for all.
[From TMZ]
We’ve heard this kind of crap before, and Linnocent still ends up drunk, high and braless. Remember her probation report? The dumbass was drinking WHILE she was in rehab. And after. And God knows what else – I guess they were only testing for alcohol, not crack.
I guess I shouldn’t call her a dumbass though. She has a kind of genius for crack shenanigans, and hey, she continues to get away with EVERYTHING. Of course she “learned her lesson.” The “lesson” being that “Linnocent can do whatever the hell she wants and never face any real consequences.” Lesson #2: “Manufacture crack drama whenever possible under the guise of ‘life lessons’.”
Photos courtesy of Pacific Coast News.
You know, I read this and thought I really don’t care, does anybody any more?
She loves the attention she gets so the more outrageous the lies are (I am going to be sober forever)the more attention she gets…that’s the lesson and apparently she’s….winning! (Charlie Sheen is her sober coach).
Surely if “she’s serious this time … no drugs, no booze, no breaking the law … ever again … PERIOD.” then her probation could run until the end of her life (instead of 3 years) and it wouldn’t matter, because she’d be living so cleanly she’d never breach the terms?!! By complaining about it, she’s clearly demonstrating that she has no intention of quitting the crack-shenanigans long-term.
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@Bex: I expect the pedestrians and boutique owners of Los Angeles care, but you’re probably right.
“The “lesson” being that “Linnocent can do whatever the h*ll she wants and never face any real consequences.”
LOL i hope she means it this time. She did avoid becoming a felon thanks to the awesome Shawn Holley and Blair Berk. The Rivderside investigators said she was drinking but she passed the betty ford alcohol test whenever it took place.
Yawn.
What a pile of steaming BS dear Linnosent!
No drugs, no booze and no law breaking?! And this FOREVER?! God, have mercy!
innocent- whatever do you see in this narcissistic piece of white trash who’s had so much work done she looks like a 60 year old transexual hooker?
I wonder how long until the next arrest.
Innocent I guess you’ve earned the right to gloat….but Lindsay is going to need your support again very soon she is never going to stop boozing/drugging/stealing and sooner or later she’ll be back in court.
Gah, perhaps gossip sites should start banning her and her BS. I’m sure everyone could use a break from this crackhead especially the people who have been reporting on her for so long and have seen her wriggle her way out of justice time after time.
On my part, I’m never going to see any movie or tv parts she acts in again.
“Lindsay Lohan plans to stay on the straight and narrow for the REST OF HER LIFE — telling friends, she’s serious this time … no drugs, no booze, no breaking the law … ever again … PERIOD.”
does she not realize that by making statements like this, there is MORE pressure on her to not screw up? at this point it’s just the boy who cried “wolf!”
…or the girl who cried “crack!”
seriously…people hear this come out of her mouth and go “yeah, suuuuuuuuure you’re serious, Lindz” while rolling their eyes.
(and tapioco, great point there about the three years…why should she care?)
Hey Innocent, you forgot a few things-like three years probation, with randrom drug testing. And Holley, who still hsn’t been paid yet, had nothing to do with the reduction to a lesser offense. If you are going to gloat, get your facts correct. Can’t wait to see your girl with her newest ankle bracelet.
And since we are on the subject,there’s a dead give-away in the TMZ article that demonstrates it’s the same-old, same-old: that Blohan didn’t “deserve” three years of probation.
I would believe Linnocent learns her lesson, when pigs fly (literally)
FYI: Linnocent is the PIG (the one who can’t FLY but often gets HIGH)
This has been her line for years. It is boring, like watching re-runs of a show you’re not too interested in as a bulwark against depression. At this point, her biggest accomplishment is passing drug and alcohol tests “with flying colors.” Is that what so impresses you Innocent, or is it that she can do this while juggling multiple venereal diseases, with her breasts tied behind her back, while dancing on the grave of her career?
@sapphire
Who said i was gloating? Also the drug testing which there has been some confusion about only be until November unless she completes her community service before then.
FYI: Linnocent is the PIG (the one who can’t FLY but often gets HIGH)
@Quest
Ha ha that is a good one.
Yeah I know a bunch of crackheads that could get sober while hanging around the same “friends”.
Innocent: finish her community service before Nov?! Are u mad? It took her what something like 3 years to finish court ordered alcohol lessons
This is why Linnocent will never be free, she can’t not mess up
Also the fact she is complaining about her 3 years probation is indicative that Linnocent has learned nothing. Why complain if she’s now going to remain sober and stay legal?!
Come on, guys…isn’t Blohan the first person that comes to your mind as the picture of sobriety and clean, healthy living? 😀
Linnocent probably called/texted TMZ while snorting a line off one of the tables she PERSONALLY scarred at the Marmont, while an assistant poured more vodka into her red bull under the table.
I know how you roll, Snortcake.
Her new publicist/image consultant is gonna have to do better than this!!
Lesson learned: if I ever get in trouble in California, get Lindsay’s lawyer because she is the real reason Lindsay gets away with her cracked out shenanigans.
I cracked up at this yesterday on TMZ.
This so sounds just like a child speaking: “I’m really, really, really sorry and I’ll never, ever, ever, ever do it again!”. Ha! That tequila party with Marilyn Manson on Saturday night was just networking….really.
No publicist in their right mind would put something like this out there especially given her circumstances. Any story on TMZ that references “friends of Lindsay” or “sources close to Lindsay” are of course from the Dina momma’s got to pay the bills propaganda machine. I’m actually feeling kinda sorry for the new publicist guy. If you look at his company website he lists a lot of corporate clients I wonder if he has any experience dealing with the likes of the “Lohan Grief Tornado” as someone else dubbed it. Wonder if the Lohan phone lines are burning up this morning with the smack down.
What LL needs is a 24-7 babysitter and sober coach.
@innocent: Lindsay didn’t flunk any BF alcohol tests because she beat up the woman who was going to give her one. Also, the Riverside police got their information from PEOPLE WHO SAW HER DRINKING.
Also I read her bill from Shawn Holley is $135K!!! You always talk about how this wastes the court’s time . . . but don’t you think that this is a huge waste of money that something that could have been handled relatively quickly had she just manned up and took it? And how’s she going to pay something like that? She was screaming poverty in rehab!
@bluhare
She was pleading poverty to get as light a sentence as possible. Obviously she wanted to avoid jail and in September rehab was her only option.
I didn’t see her or Shawn saying that she would go to jail instead of back to rehab.
Danette Meyers wasted the court’s time by allowing this to get to the prelim stage by not offering a realistic plea deal.
The most important thing that came out of this is that Lindsay is still a non violent MISDMEANOR offender which means even if she goes to jail she will always serve the least amount of time.
OK, I gotta bite, Innocent.
She pleaded poverty to get a lower jail sentence. WTF??? I don’t see that it makes much difference to people barely eking out a living and WHO HAVE CHILDREN when it comes to jail sentencing. Any idea why Lindsay thought so? Don’t suppose she was trying to make a play for sympathy, do you?
Danette Myers was doing her job, and none of this would have happened if Lindsay hadn’t stolen a necklace. And why are you crowing she’s only been convicted as a non-violent misdemeanor crackhead? Yes, convicted. Not freed because she’s innocent.
But you didn’t address my comments re her drinking in rehab, when you’re the one who brought it up. And how did she know she was going to be charged with a felony when she was there as she (a) hadn’t beat Dawn Holland up yet, and (b) hadn’t stolen the necklace?
This is what, her 15829 time saying this crap?
What I think Lindsay means when she says stuff like this is: “I learned my lesson alright. Now I know I need to change my strategy so I don’t get caught next time.” all while smoking a crack-pipe.
Staying sober requires a person to actually work on it, and Lindsay is too lazy to do that. All she wants is to be photographed, party, and party some more.
LMAO…Obviously Lil Miss Snortcake has no PR rep5, there is now way in the world any PR rep would put this kind of statement out from Snortcake.
Obviously Orange Oprah is still running the PR machine. If Orange Oprah and Snortcake really wanted to get the public to believ in any of this, they should just shut up and not make any statements perido, and keep Snortcake out of the party scene period.
The more they keep making idiotic statements like this, and the more Snortcake is out at the clubs just goes to prove the point that Snortcake isn’t taking this seriously…. and neither will anyone else when it comes to her being able to get work in a movie.
@bluhare
No she wanted to avoid jail by doing the littlest amount of rehab as possible but the Judge forced her to complete the program.
Have you noticed the only time Lindsay goes to rehab is when she is facing jail time ?
She didn’t fail the test at Betty Ford and nothing was going to happen anyway with the battery as Dawn Holland’s actions jacked up the investigation.
As for the necklace case then maybe Danette Meyers should have been tested if she thought Lindsay was going to plead out to a felony over that BS.
Yes it is a conviction but Lindsay didn’t admit guilt. It was in her best interests as she didn’t get any additional time for violating probation whcih she did anyway because of the failed alcohol test.
to quote innocent:
“Have you noticed the only time Lindsay goes to rehab is when she is facing jail time ?”
that right there is the surest proof that lilo has NOT learned her lesson and that lilo does NOT intend to change.
straight from innocent’s own mouth.
🙂
and oooo i just noticed something on Samantha’s twitter.
twittertroll: @samantharonson Did LL steal your stones shirt? Lol RT: @911_Hollywood: Lindsay Lohan at Marilyn Manson’s.. http://bit.ly/iTrsaQ
samantha: @Megan_Mitchell2 apparently
now it’s possible Sam is just being sarcastic.. it’s also possible (given linmate’s history) that lilo really did steal sam’s shirt and sam is just writing it off as lost. trying to get lilo to return something she’s “rightfully stolen” is more trouble than it’s worth…especially as linnocent keeps getting off with a slap on the wrist.
and another edit cuz i thought of something else. linnocent was papped at betty ford wearing a brown jacket that looks a lot like the jacket sam wore when lilo chansed her around london..sam later said on twitter that she’d lost that jacket. maybe she lost it to lilo too?
just a thought.
OMG, Perez has a bit up about people who saw her drinking Sat nite at the Marmont!!! They say they got pix, even though one of Lindsay’s friendds dumped their camera in ice . . . the memory card’s OK. No pix with the post, but if this is true I bet they’re still on the auction block over there at TMZ or at Lindsay’s house. If so, she didn’t even make 24 hours from her “As God as my witness, I’ll never go drinking again” speech!
bluhare’s post… i think perez is referencing a radar story at
http://www.radaronline.com/exclusives/2011/05/lindsay-lohan-drunk-belligerent-camera-ice-water-paul-and-andre-hollywood
two things i find funny… 1 if THAT is the pic that made lilo’s friends go beserk and dunk the camera in ice.. then lilo must be paranoid about being caught doing something. cuz that pic doesn’t look hugely incriminating on its own.
and 2… she’s wearing the shirt she wore to the marilyn manson thing.. the one she MIGHT have stolen from sam at some point.
so this happened the same night as the marilyn manson pics i think.
well at some point recently.. i guess after the drinking story broke..lilo posted a twitpic showing a guy she claimed was a stalker… and she asked her fans and supporters to stand by her as she dealt with it.
my cynicism must be showing cuz my first reaction was “is this being thrown out as distraction from the clubing pics?”
And I’m back yet again….lilo has posted some chick’s phone number on twitter.
Is this hammered-lilo behavior?
I guess she’ll say this girl is stalking her too?
And around we go again….