The last time we covered RHOBH’s Kyle Richards, there was a lot of back and forth about whether she is a superficial bully (my belief) or whether she’s just using tough love to deal with a sister who is a drug addict. (She very well may be, but that doesn’t mean she’s not a bully IMO.) Kyle is promoting her new advice book, where she thinks we all want her relationship, her fake-looking hair, and her makeup tips on how to finely skirt the line between looking puffed up and overdone and looking like a drag queen.
Kyle was on Good Morning America yesterday, and host Robin Roberts asked her what she meant in her book by claiming that cheaters should get one free pass to step out on their spouses. Kyle claimed that of course she wasn’t writing about herself or her husband at all (yeah right) but that she knew a couple who had dealt with infidelity and survived and that it’s possible.
Good Morning America host Robin Roberts confronted the socialite about her beliefs on US breakfast TV this morning.
The presenter said she wanted to ask Kyle what she meant by saying: ‘If you cheat on your spouse once do not tell. You get a free pass…’
But the star was unapologetic.
Kyle said: ‘I know [sic] I was going to get some heat for that.’
She then went on to describe one scenario saying: ‘I’ve seen circumstances with people that I know are in love with their spouse and they made one mistake and I said – this is somebody that I know, nobody that anybody knows here,
“Listen, if this really was a one time mistake, and you did not put this person in jeopardy, I personally think you should deal with it with yourself and with God and not go and say: ‘Honey look what I did,'” because I knew that this would ruin their relationship and their life.‘So I said: “It did not happen”.
‘And I can tell you that many, many, many years later they’re happy and together and she did make that mistake and she has to carry that and live with that…’
Mix and match: Kyle says she pairs expensive designer clothes with high street brands
Perhaps sensing that people would think she was the person in question, Kyle quickly said: ‘And it’s not me!’
Looking at her husband who was obviously on set, unseen by the cameras, she went on to say jokingly: ‘My husband is over there sweating bullets.
‘I know I get a lot of heat for that, but I do feel that and I know they’re still going strong.’
When it comes to her own marriage, Kyle said the secret of her success is appreciating her relationship.
Speaking about Mauricio – who is her second husband – she said they have been together for 17-and-a-half years because she appreciates him and what they have together.
Kyle said: ‘I’m very appreciative of my marriage and my husband…
‘I know what we have and I make sure to never forget that and make sure that he feels appreciated every day and he makes me feel appreciated every day.
‘He makes it easy to.’
[From The Daily Mail via ONTD]
So Kyle is describing a scenario where a woman cheated on a man once and didn’t tell him. This was allegedly a friend of hers whom she counseled not to tell the husband. That sounds like b.s. to me. That sounds like something she went through with Mr. Nice Guy Rico Suave Muaricio and forgave him for since he convinced her it was a one-off. “Baby, I’m so sorry, it was just the one time. She meant nothing to me.” Yeah, it was the one time he got busted and after that he was much more careful about it.
Should cheaters get a free pass? I think that should be their partner’s decision.
Photos are from 1/2/12. Photo credit: GG/FameFlynet Pictures
Bitch please. You know you gave your husband more than one pass so don’t even try to make this about an imaginary friend. I don’t watch this show regularly but the ones I did see, homeboy was looking at this little young waitress or something like he wanted to eat her for breakfast.
LOLZ! She’s got blinders on. Seriously.
Here’s my take on the “one free pass” idea – and why it doesn’t work:
* the guilt will (or should) eat away at you, if love your spouse at all
* you risk exposing your spouse to an
STD
*you can get emotionally involved with a one nite stand, even if you don’t intend to – that’s the nature of sex.
*happy and fulfilled couples don’t cheat. They cherish their relationship and wouldn’t do anything to betray their spouse. They don’t ever even “go there.”
*once you cheat, it’s easier to justify doing it again… and again.
COSIGN!
Everything Kyle says and does is driven by selfish ego, “You embarrass ME!” “I’m deserve more.” “Throwing you out of MY party is the hardest things I’VE EVER HAD TO DO!” And she assumes that her life choices should be Kim’s. And that she is/must always be the eye-catching one – NOT! Invest in a mirror, sweetheart. The picture you continue to paint is not pretty (sympathetic, admirable…)
In the town full of phonies she is the ultimate phony bitch.
This.
And she’s important how?
Cant stand her, but I do agree that if you cheat, that’s your thing to deal/live with. I would never encourage someone to lie to their partner tho, how bout some respect.
I knew this oily realtor that bragged about all the sex he’d have in the houses he had listed- Kyles husband gives me the oily cheater vibe bigtime.
I still can’t believe she was Lindsey in Halloween.
I’m not a huge fan of hers, but she has a point. Life is long, and people mess up. I also disagree about her hair looking fake. I just think she is blessed with really great hair. She’s a good looking woman, she looks more real than the rest of the housewives.
She’s not bad-looking, but when I look at her, all I see is an older Paris Hilton with dark hair. *shudder*
I think that often times cheating is the straw on the camels back, and the relationship sucked in many other ways. If that is the case then there should be counseling on why it let to cheating and how to change it. If the guys/girl is just in general a disrespectful jerk, then its not going to get better so IMHO the SO should leave. But occasionally lust and tempation get the better of us. I would respect if my partner came to me ONE TIME and said that he made a mistake. Honesty is key here. Lying just makes the infidelity that much harder to deal with.
ITA
I can understand giving the pass and working on the relationship IF the cheater comes clean. If the cheater doesn’t come clean and the other person finds out down the line, there’s a double betrayal undermining the trust: the cheating and the lie of omission by intentionally not telling the partner. The latter is what usually becomes unforgivable because it actually makes it so much harder to rebuild the trust.
I think if the relationship sucked in other ways, cheating should definitely end it. Not everything can or should be repaired. I also believe that there’s cases of one-time cheaters who are looking for a way to destroy the relationship because they didn’t have the nerve to end it outright.
Girl, you are on the money! I suspected the ex of cheating for YEARS but never had “proof.” Wasted a year going to marriage counseling with that passive-aggressive ass.
But once I KNEW (had proof), I said “If you wanted a divorce, why didn’t you have the balls to tell me? Why did you have to disrespect me in this way?” (sex in OUR bed, in OUR house, with OUR kids asleep down the hall, while I was working my 2nd job!)
I disagree. If my husband cheated on me once, would never do it again then there is no reason for him to tell me.
When people fess up about a one time bad thing – they are not being honest they are relieving themselves of their own guilt.
Why should I be hurt ( or anyone for that matter ) because he feels guilty?
If my husband was a constant cheat and never stopped – then yes I would want to know as that is not going to stop.
That’s exactly what I think. I’d rather not know if it was a genuine mistake and would never happen again. Telling your partner in that circumstance is ultimately a selfish move and would probably be the thing that indicated they weren’t worthy of being with me – moreso than the cheating.
I’ve talked with many friends, both male and female about this issue. Some of them said they would want to know if their partner cheated. A couple of them said they would want to know, but than after it really happened they wished they didn’t know. Most said that if they were truly happy in their relationship and their partner cheated once they would rather not know. I agree with the later.
I’m curious about one other thing. For those of u who have known someone who has cheated, do u find it is more often the male or the female who does the cheating? In my experience, it has been the later which surprised me.
Can’t do it and won’t do it. I’ve never met a one time cheater in my life. I’m not saying they don’t exist, but in my experience, once a cheater, always a cheater. It opens up a door in the mind and puts the temptations there.
ITA. I told my husband that I have the capability to forgive him for anything EXCEPT cheating. I would sooner live in a cardboard box in a back alley than live with a cheater. My mother is STILL married to my philandering father and she’s miserable. I feel bad for her because she’s never known what it’s like to feel loved or appreciated. She hates him and his behavior has made her hate her life. I would never want to live like that.
Oh I’ve known people who cheated once and then never again. It’s possible. It all depends on the circumstances that led to the cheating, the repair of the marriage after, and the person themselves.
In a longterm marriage, the chances of cheating once are at least 50 percent. I would not want to know if it didn’t go on.
My husband cheating nearly ruined our marriage. I wish I didn’t know 2 years later and it still a bit heavy in the soul.
I’ve seen this advice before, not to tell if it’s a one-time thing.
My unscientific observations: Women will cheat once and never again, on the whole. Men don’t cheat once. But if they do, they leave the spouse for the other woman (this is often true for women as well).
However, regarding forgiveness, women will forgive cheating once thinking the men must be so regretful they’ll never do it again, men will dump the woman, reasoning that if you forgive her once, she’ll figure she can get away with it.
with guys its totally a pride/testosterone thing. Women need to get like that. Im totally over the love instead of respect thing (which should be hand in hand but apparently not). Its 2012
It was my boyfriend who told me that reasoning of guys. I hadn’t thought of it before (and neither one of us had cheated, it was part of a discussion about the issue, just ftr, lol.) I thought about it and realized that the women I know do talk like that, about him being regretful, etc.
Now I agree with the guys, by the way.
Depends on the man if they have kids. I know several married men friends who want to leave their wives, cheat and are not happy in their marriage but wont leave until the kids are 18 or older.
Why? money mostly. They say it’s for the “kids” but really they don’t want to pay any more than they have to..and to me those are the worst types of men.
It’s far easier for a man to start over at 45 or 50 than a woman…
I’ve seen it too. Woman cheats once, regrets the bad decision, doesn’t tell & it never happens again.
Men, are different. You have a good guy who won’t go there, OR he’s a hound & a slut, cheating every chance he has. A good man won’t tolerate his wife doing him wrong and splits. This isn’t always true, but more often then not.
Either sex, IMO, if you make one mistake & never do it again, don’t tell. It would only cause pain and divorce, and for why? – especially if you have children.
the problem with not telling yourself is that the cheating is often inevitably revealed at a later date. so, since you believe don’t tell under the circumstances you reference above, what would you do?
Every time some guy breaks out the “Man wasn’t meant to be monogamous” crap I want to punch his face through the back of his skull.
Man was meant to hang out up a tree flinging shit at the next tree. No excuses.
Is this like the female version of that?
This is all too simplistic. There is a way of letting a partner know without letting them know, so to speak. Also, quite often, people don’t want to know. Two examples: I once had a brief relationship with a man who had a long-term partner who lived in another county. At the beginning of our involvement he told me that his partner and him had an agreement whereby for as long as they lived in different countries, and therefore led largely separate lives, they could be with other people, but that these other people would not be allowed to become a part of their life together, and, yes, that did involve discussing these people. Towards the end of our involvement, he told me that his partner, sensing that he had become distant, had asked him if he had become emotionally attached to someone else but before he had had a chance to reply had told him that she did not want to know, thereby placing the responsibility for the survival of their relationship in his hands. I asked him if he shared her feelings and he said that he did. (I believe/d him: at the beginning of their relationship she had slept with a good friend of his, subsequent to which he had left her, only to realize shortly afterwards that the incident was not as significant as he had initially believed it to be (wishing, perhaps, even never to have been told about it) and that the relationship was worth continuing.) Second example: I was recently on holiday with a good female friend of mine whose partner was on a work trip to another country and she was convinced that while there he would end up sleeping with the woman whose house he was staying in. She was in a terrible mood throughout our weekend together but when I spoke to her on the phone sometime later insisted that everything was now okay between them and that she had overreacted. In short, she wanted to brush the whole thing under the carpet.
I believe Kyle must be on Lindsay Lohan’s booger sugar, if she thinks everyone believes she’s NOT talking about herself. I bet her hubby cheats on her alllllll the time, and in vice-versa. In my opinion, I think its up to your partner whether or not “one-time” cheating merits a pass, or being kicked to the curb. But honestly, whenever this lady does or says something, I can’t help but roll my eyes in disgust.
it depends on the person. some choose to forgie, some don’t even really care/have don’t ask don’t tell policies and some are unforgiving, I fall under the latter but people shouldn’t try to impose their views on others. idk. and that lady looks like brooke shields
From watching the show I got the impression her husband is putting it around and that yes she is indeed as Celebitchy says nothing more, nothing less than a bully – she seems to orchestrate a lot of the hysteria that builds, then gets another of her posse to hold the coats while she instructs yet another Housewife to deliver the blows on some hapless creature (sister or otherwise). There’s a strange self righteousness about her. Karma bus is no doubt on its way.
Spoken like a true cheater…. most folks rarely get caught, or at least not every time, so does the one free pass only count when you get busted??
word.
She’s got the thinking of a cheater. Barbara Walters used to excuse the cheating too and then we found out it was b/c she was a houndette.
As when men say stuff like this, they’re just revealing who they are and trying to universalize it to excuse that.
But they can’t. This is no reflection on the rest of us.
And she does look fake. Something about her hair is most definitely faux although I can’t put my finger on it, her face is drawn on with stencil and color and someone took their roadside tire inflator to her lips.
Course the other women on that show look a lot worse.
The hair is totally fake.
I actually kind of agree with her. If you are genuinely in love, then go out and have a drunken and meaningless one night stand, there’s really no point in unnecessarily hurting the other person and potentially destroying the relationship. An affair is a different story…
TOTALLY AGREE!
“If you are genuinely in love, then go out and have a drunken and meaningless one night stand, there’s really no point in unnecessarily hurting the other person and potentially destroying the relationship”
you already hurt the person and destroyed the relationship by cheating.
I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I cheated on my boyfriend. I wouldn’t be able to look him in the eyes. I find myself going out less to clubs with my girlfriends because of the fact, that people can get drunk…one thing leads to another…not saying I WOULD, but the temptation is always there. I would just rather keep away from that instead of putting myself in those situations.
don’t cheat.
it’s really simple.
DON’T CHEAT.
No pass. You cheat and you want to save your marriage – you come clean and deal with the fallout. Otherwise, the relationship now has a nasty little secret that when exposed (and it eventually will be) will become more than the initial cheating. Now it’s a lie upon a lie upon a lie. And with that comes the mentality “I got away with it once, why not again?” Marriages can survive cheating, but not if it’s never addressed until it’s too late.
yup, totally agree!
Kyle is a naturally beautiful, genuinely funny, honest woman who makes the show. She loves her sister so much and obviously cares about her. She is open minded and clearly knows that people make mistakes. Everyone needs to not be so prudish and realize that having an open relationship works and that sometimes people make mistakes. We aren’t perfect! LOVE HER.
Surely this is a joke, what, I’m one of 5 people who believe in marriage vows? I married my husband to be with my husband, cheating is breaking a vow. PERIOD. It’s pretty damn simple. There isn’t a damn stipulation or “pass”. Your sorry behind can “pass” through the front door with your bags if you think you can just cheat on me and it’s no biggie. But let’s not make gay marriage legal, god forbid. Straight marriages can get “passes” and do as they please despite their vows but somehow a gay couple’s love isn’t valid? Puh-lease….
If my husband cheated on me, I think he would probably be out the door. The ONLY chance he would have to stay in the marriage would be if he had come clean himself and fought to save the marriage. But even then… I don’t know that I could forgive cheating. But better divorced over cheating than me castrating him for cheating AND lying.
She’s not only vile but dumber. Maybe the botox crept to her brains!
It’s a hard thing. I can’t tolerate cheating, I’d never forgive such a thing, so if it was a one time thing and it never ever happened again I’d rather not know hecause knowing myself I couldn’t forgive. I’d rather not know and keep my marriage if it happened once and it was a drunken thing.
I’m a born romantic and want to believe in the whole being together for 50 years and never cheating but in this day and age I’m beginning to wander if that happens anymore for anyone.
I guess poor Kim Richards never did escape from witch mountain.
Why would anyone take advice from this awful person? I cannot believe she has a book, how atrocious.
I know! I guess once Snooki released a book the flood gates open for any other 15-minuter to do the same. In this case I would do a Courtney Stodden & use it for a door stop.
Definitely a superficial bully who has been cheated on and cheated herself while telling every one in the world they can cheat and get away with it. Pot, kettle, black. Nice. Real nice. 😐
I would never tell on myself. Whether I cheat once, twice or three times!
you guys are forgetting STDs. not even condoms save you 100%.
its NOT your decision to tell, your partner deserves and needs to know it.
what would you think if your partner cheated on you once, didnt tell you and then you get Ovarian cancer?
people are so egoistic and irressonsible these days and then want to tell me “be tolerant”. no im not tolerant towards peopel who endamger the health of others just because they cant control themselves.
it is in no way right to lie about cheating. if you cant be faithful, ok but then dont enter relationships or end them if they are bad.
living in 2012 does mean you can have fun before marriage but it certainly doesnt mean you can take a dump on innocent people.