Forgive me for reverting to these photos wherein Justin Bieber appears to require a diaper change because — let’s face it — the flying, white-suit concert photos are growing old and repetitive.

Yesterday, we covered Justin’s latest escapade in angering his closed-gate, private neighborhood. The first time this happened, Biebs (allegedly) spat in his neighbor’s face and threatened to kill the guy, and now he’s been spotted while speeding at 100 mph through the hood and then running like hell from former NFL player Keyshawn Johnson. For the record, I don’t think that Keyshawn meant to do anything to teach Bieber a lesson in a physical sense. Rather, Keyshawn probably intended to put a good scare into Biebs, which is exactly what his overinflated ego needs. This kid doesn’t even know the meaning of the word “consequences,” and he needs to realize the error of his ways before he hurts himself or someone else. Of course, TMZ has obtained word that Bieber claims he is being “framed” for these high-speed incidents:

Justin Bieber has a pat defense these days … as in, “I’m being framed,” and we’ve learned that’s exactly how he’s attacking 2 criminal investigations targeting him.

CRIMINAL CASE #1:

The L.A. County District Attorney is currently deciding whether to prosecute Bieber for allegedly spitting in a neighbor’s face and threatening to kill him after the neighbor confronted the singer for driving his Ferrari at breakneck speeds in the neighborhood.

Law enforcement sources tell us … Bieber’s people have told the D.A. they have a witness who will swear under oath … Justin didn’t spit. Our sources say the D.A. will not make a decision until they’re able to interview the witness. FYI … law enforcement sources tell us they have at least one witness — aside from the alleged victim — who will testify he saw the Biebs spit in the guy’s face.

CRIMINAL CASE #2:

As we first reported … Justin’s being investigated for reckless driving after allegedly racing his white Ferrari Monday night on the streets of his gated community. Sources connected with the singer are quietly floating the defense that Justin was not driving.

Here’s the problem. We broke the story … Keyshawn Johnson chased Bieber down in his Prius and then blocked his driveway. We’re told Keyshawn actually ran up the driveway into the garage and eyeballed Bieber jumping out of the car and running into the house. Law enforcement also tells TMZ … multiple witnesses “clearly saw” Bieber driving the car.

We’re told the L.A. County Sheriff’s Dept. will refer the latest Ferrari case to the D.A. shortly. If things keep up, the D.A. is gonna need a special Bieber prosecutor.

[From TMZ]

While most of us will certainly appreciate the succinct manner in which TMZ has recapped the dual Bieber cases involving (righteous) neighborly anger, I honestly doubt anything will come of it. The right thing would be for the LAPD or Sheriff to actually hold Bieber to the same standards as any civilian, but we know that won’t happen. The best that we can hope for is that Bieber has been scared enough by Keyshawn Johnson to mend his ways.

In other Bieber-related news, there’s a (mostly) ridiculous story circulating from this week’s issue of Star (via Hollywood Life) in which an unidentified woman claims that she enjoyed one grand night of passion with Bieber in 2010. Of course, this tryst allegedly took place while he was 15 years old, and she was — wait for it — 25 years old. I am assuming that this woman seeks to protect her identity because of, you know, the question of statutory rape. However, the story goes into an odd level of detail about how she and Biebs allegedly got it on after meeting at a Floridian TGI Fridays restaurant, and she insists that Biebs is the father but promises that she isn’t interested in child support at all: “She’s going to leave it up to Justin to decide, at any point in the future that he chooses, if he ever wants to get involved with the child.” Yes, this tale strongly flashes shades of Mariah Yeater in its odd and (probably) contrived level of detail. It’s likely not true, and if it is … that poor child. Biebs can’t even take care of a monkey.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and Pacific Coast News