Mark Ruffalo has some thoughts about your biscuit. Thankfully, he doesn’t have strong feelings about what you should or should not do with your reproductive system, and that’s just the point. Ruffalo wrote an open letter defending a woman’s right to choose, and it was read at a pro-choice rally in Mississippi over the weekend. Mississippi has declared war on women’s reproductive systems for a while now, and there’s only one abortion clinic left in the state (and the state government is actively trying to shut it down). So, Ruffalo’s letter was read outside of the Jackson Women’s Health Organization. Here’s the letter:
I am a man. I could say this has nothing to do with me. Except I have two daughters and I have a mother who was forced to illegally have an abortion in her state where abortion was illegal when she was a very young woman. It cost $600 cash. It was a traumatizing thing for her. It was shameful and sleazy and demeaning. When I heard the story I was aghast by the lowliness of a society that would make a woman do that. I could not understand its lack of humanity; today is no different.
What happened to my mother was a relic of an America that was not free nor equal nor very kind. My mother’s illegal abortion marked a time in America that we have worked long and hard to leave behind. It was a time when women were seen as second rate citizens who were not smart enough, nor responsible enough, nor capable enough to make decisions about their lives. It was a time that deserved to be left behind, and leave it behind we did, or so it seemed. We made abortion and a woman’s ability to be her own master a right. That right was codified into law. That law was the law of the land for decades.
My own mother fought to make herself more than a possession; she lived her life as a mother who chose when she would have children, and a wife who could earn a living if she so chose. I want my daughters to enjoy that same choice. I don’t want to turn back the hands of time to when women shuttled across state lines in the thick of night to resolve an unwanted pregnancy, in a cheap hotel room just south of the state line. Where a transaction of $600 cash becomes the worth of a young woman’s life.
So that is why I am lending my voice to you and your movement today. Because I actually trust the women I know. I trust them with their choices, I trust them with their bodies and I trust them with their children. I trust that they are decent enough and wise enough and worthy enough to carry the right of Abortion and not be forced to criminally exercise that Right at the risk of death or jail time.
There was no mistake in us making abortion legal and available on demand. That was what we call progress. Just like it was no mistake that we abolished institutional racism in this country around the same time. The easy thing to do is lay low, but then are we who we say we are? Do we actually stand for anything, if what we do stand for is under attack and we say nothing? There is nothing to be ashamed of here except to allow a radical and recessive group of people to bully and intimidate our mothers and sisters and daughters for exercising their right of choice. Or use terrorism and fanaticism to block their legal rights or take the lives of their caregivers. Or design legislation that would chip away at those rights disguised as reinforcing a woman’s health.
I invite you to find your voice and let it be known that you stand for abortion rights and the dignity of a woman to be the master of her own life and body. I invite you to search your soul and ask yourself if you actually stand for what you say you stand for. Thank you for being here today and thank you for standing up for the women in my life.
[Ruffalo’s open letter, via HuffPo]
I’ve been feeling this for a long time, but I think it needs to be said again – the modern women’s rights movement, especially the pro-choice movement, needs to organize itself more like the LBGT movement and publicly invite “allies” of the cause to speak up. You don’t need a vagina to have an opinion about women’s reproductive rights (and that’s certainly not stopping the anti-choice advocates). I wish more men would come out and publicly proclaim their pro-choice-ness. Yay for Ruffalo.
Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.
I love him for this.
I’m also a male, so here’s my view. Abortion is an awful process that kills human lives. I could rant for pages as for the reason for my convictions, but seriously it is such a selfish choice.
Then don’t have one…..
Having kids is a selfish choice, the kid doesn´t decide he/she wants to be born, he/she will be born because of your decision.
Nothing is worse than having a bad mother who makes you wish you never were born in the first place.
If a woman decides she is not ready to have a child, then trust her.
You really have no business speaking about this anyway, no uterus no opinion.
As selfish as bringing a kid into the world and not being able to take care of it? Or dumping it off in the adoption system that’s horrible? Yeah, let me get on that.
You’re right Andrew. It does kill human lives. Which is why it should be legal. So more women don’t die.
Selfish? To make the choice to not add yet another child to the world who can’t be cared for? To want some measure of control over one’s own body is not selfish.
Whenever people claim abortion is selfish, it is clear that that person does not live in the real world.
It is not selfish for every child who is born to be planned for or wanted by the people who will actually be caring for that child.
What is selfish is for people to force women to carry to term without regard to that woman’s health, finances, or ability to provide care for a child or another child.
…says the one who is under zero pressure to actually, you know, raise an unwanted child. Daddies can just walk away and send a check. They don’t have to mess up their body just to have it, care about it, and keep it alive and well for 18 years if they don’t want to.
It’s selfish to try and make abortion illegal, because it doesn’t stop them, just makes them more dangerous. Plus, this opinion is based on your religious convictions, which should have NOTHING to do with our laws here in this secular country.
@Andrew 3 words, just shut up.
MY body. MY choice!
Yes, Abortion is an awful process but sometimes we have no choice.
To have a lot of pregnancies is awful process for our body.
Sometimes we are raped and this is awful process for our minds and souls. Do You have more to say?
I’m pro choice, but I don’t think some of the people posting should go at Andrew like that. People have the right to speak their minds and debate and learn, and it’s not going to happen through nastiness. Those who explained their POV without venom are more likely to be listened to. That said, I really love you, Mark Ruffalo.
Call me crazy but I fail to see why a gay man would give a shoot about what a woman does with her body. Straight dudes may have a stake I guess but you Andrew, I dunno.
Andrew
You are entitled to your opinion. We all are. I hope you express your opinion to every woman you sleep with. I hope they’re made fully aware of your convictions. I hope you have not based your opinions on false propaganda written to sway thoughts to blame those involved in the abortion process or the woman having it. There is too much false information out there.
I’ve seen more men oppose a woman’s right to choose because of their religious beliefs, family opinion, or having been wronged by a female in their past. In short, You think their way because someone told you to. Not because you’ve made an informed decision weighing all the facts on your own.
You have your opinion and you are entitled to it.
Quite frankly, I can’t tell if you’re incredibly brave to post it here or if you did so intent on raising a ruckus.
LOL. I’m selfish. Many people are. In other news, the sky is blue and grass is green.
Our observations about humanity, the human condition and our world have zilch to do with my uterus.
In other news, I don’t need strangers to approve of my motives for much of anything, really. Good luck with your life. Thanks for stopping by.
Well, sometimes in life you just have to be selfish. My life isn’t worth less than that of an unborn heap of cells.
I’m a female. Politically I’m pro-choice. Personally I’m pro life. So I can honestly see where Andrew may be coming from with his opinion and here’s why , and I’m sure I may sound a bit controversial.
Personally I have been on this earth close to 40 years and have been having sex (and a hell of a lot of it) for about 20. There are so many ways to avoid getting pregnant in the first place that (aside from rape or high risk pregnancies) that abortion IMO shouldn’t even be necessary and be at the very least, a last resort. I have only gotten pregnant once in my life, fourteen years ago. And I actually planned it that time. Ever since then I have been able to avoid it with so many different possible birth control alternatives out there. (Knock on wood).
When I did get pregnant, I chronicled every week of my child’s development/gestation and I also know about the abortion process, and that’s why I, personally, am against abortion for MYSELF.
HOWEVER, I would NEVER project my own feelings/ideals on a fellow woman, and strongly believe that no man should have the right to begin to tell a woman what to do with her own body. And I know that I may feel a certain way about it now, but there may come a time where I may feel compelled to make a decision based on the circumstances of my life.
Every situation is different, and it’s a slippery slope to allow the government to determine who or which situation is allowed a personal choice. Let me re-iterate PERSONAL choice. The woman is the one that ultimately has to live with her choice, in either instance. And I’ll be damned if we charge a bunch of mostly old white men to dictate to us what choice we can make with our bodies for our own good.
“I could rant for pages but…” what, they’re running out of ink on the internet? Or you just don’t have any valid points. Douche.
who the f&**& cares ,what a random male thinks abt a situation he has no clue abt and which he will nvr experience as a woman,its a womans body ,as long as the foetus is attached to her placenta ,its part of her body (especially in circumstances involving the absence of a male parent ,rape , health problem) its upto her to decide whether she can have the child or not ,no questions askd ,no judgement ,love Ruffalo
I had written this earlier, but it somehow disappeared. Lord I’m sorry for firing up this. One: I am Bi, not gay. I actually see myself getting married to a woman and having kids. Two: I believe strongly in adoption. Now I am not saying that someone should just sleep around and give away kids. But I am certainly not going to support the killing of unborn children. No, I don’t have a plain answer about what should be done and what is best, but I just cannot support something that is SO clearly wrong (in my eyes). Call me crazy (you probably are, but just remember you don’t personally know me) but I don’t like the ‘my body, my choice’ argument. What about the baby’s body? What about the body that The Lord has created?
I apologize for firing this up…certainly not my intention. But this is my view, and I see no problem in posting it. Just like I see no problem in you posting your view supporting Ruffalo’s position. I may not agree with you, but I’m certainly not going to chase you down.
“What about the body that The Lord has created?”
well, you lost me right there.
you have anti-abortion views because of your religion.
NOT EVERYONE SUBSCRIBES TO YOUR RELIGION.
in fact, some people (*clutches pearls*) don’t practice ANY religion.
to add, this country doesn’t make laws based on religious views. there is NO state-sponsored religion, so any religion-based argument against abortion goes out the door. (likewise with most arguments against gay marriage…BTW, did you know that your Lord considers it a sin to lie with a man as you would with a woman?)
so, if YOUR religion says it’s bad, no one is preventing you, and the women in your life, from practicing YOUR religion. they’re just preventing YOU from forcing YOUR religious beliefs on others.
Andrew, there is now way you could make that post and not realize it was inflammatory and would spark a huge debate unless you are truly that clueless.
Make abortion unnecessary. Offer birth control, family planning, support for adoption and unwanted pregnancies. Also, take care of all those unwanted children who were born out of unwanted pregnancies. Address the thousands of children who die EVERY YEAR due to neglect and abuse because these people should never have had children in the first place.
It’s very easy to ban abortion, stand outside a clinic and protest, make stupid statements about how it’s murder. It’s much harder, takes more money, time and commitment and doesn’t allow for a great sound bite to make abortion unnecessary.
Doofus: You know NOTHING about my religious beliefs or my religion. Just because I believe that The Lord created us does not mean I have a religion that I follow. Nor am I forcing my religion on others. I was just giving a reason why I believe abortion is wrong…my view on abortion is NOT because of my religion. Please don’t assume things.
Lucinda: I wasn’t thinking, it was a quick rant, I haven’t been feeling well (no excuse) and I apologize. But I see no problem in posting my view that feel very strongly about.
Andrew, you clearly do have strong opinions about this topic, and its nice to see you’ve checked back, and responded, to a really messy topic. I applaud advocating for adoption, but the fact is there is a “market” for certain types of babies, and many more are born that can’t be adoted out at infancy.Or early childhood. They sit and wait in the system, each year growing further away from adoption. They are bounced around foster homes. Many are wonnderful homes, many are not. Then the trauma of moving around, lack of resources when someone “ages out”. Lack of a stable family unit. I’ve known many people who had tremendous success with foster families, but unfortunately more who have come out with serious, serious problems I could never imagine.
Personally, I believe in the right to choose when it comes to amnios that indicate developmental disabilities. I’ve worked extensively in the field, have an aunt and cousin I love dearly, but I also know what waits later. When it comes time for them to move out, or primary caregivers cannot privide care anymore. I worked in arguably the best, most progressive agency in the state, and it kills me my aunt lives in one of the homes. Its not a life I would ever wish on someone. I could give the baby up, but disabled children are rarely adopted, 87% are abused during their lifetime, 69% of the time by family. And that’s just what’s reported. The majority of those I worked with have histories that would make you vomit.
I also support a woman who has been raped, which actually accounts for more abortions than people think. Sure, adoption could be an alternative, but is it fair to make every victim carry the result of such horror? Some do, and I commend them, but had I been impregnated by my rapist I wouldn’t be able. Luckily I was offered plan b, but not all women are offered, and not all women seek emergency treatment.
I think many people mistakenly assume the women getting abortions are careless, reckless, using abortion as after the fact birth control. I have never met a woman who came to this decision without a lot of personal anguish. Whatever drives their decision is theirs, and not a whimsical desire to keep living the single life. Well, maybe there are, but a) I’m glad they aren’t parentingthe child anyway and b) that is a serious minority that shouldn’t be representative of women in general.
I Hope next time you think about your stance on a woman’s choice you remember you don’t know the circumstances behind that choice. They could very wrll have been in your shoes, driven to make a choice they never thought they’d have to.
Please google a video a man took of people harrassing his wife. On youtube ynder “dad confronts abortion protesters”.
Apologies for such a long post, and not being able to embed the video. Love to all the women who have to make this choice.
I applaud advocating for adoption, but the fact is there is a “market” for certain types of babies, and many more are born that can’t be adoted out at infancy.Or early childhood. They sit and wait in the system, each year growing further away from adoption. They are bounced around foster homes. Many are wonnderful homes, many are not. Then the trauma of moving around, lack of resources when someone “ages out”. Lack of a stable family unit. I’ve known many people who had tremendous success with foster families, but unfortunately more who have come out with serious, serious problems I could never imagine.
Personally, I believe in the right to choose when it comes to amnios that indicate developmental disabilities. I’ve worked extensively in the field, have an aunt and cousin I love dearly, but I also know what waits later. When it comes time for them to move out, or primary caregivers cannot privide care anymore. I worked in arguably the best, most progressive agency in the state, and it kills me my aunt lives in one of the homes. Its not a life I would ever wish on someone. I could give the baby up, but disabled children are rarely adopted, 87% are abused during their lifetime, 69% of the time by family. And that’s just what’s reported. The majority of those I worked with have histories that would make you vomit.
I also support a woman who has been raped, which actually accounts for more abortions than people think. Sure, adoption could be an alternative, but is it fair to make every victim carry the result of such horror? Some do, and I commend them, but had I been impregnated by my rapist I wouldn’t be able. Luckily I was offered plan b, but not all women are offered, and not all women seek emergency treatment.
I think many people mistakenly assume the women getting abortions are careless, reckless, using abortion as after the fact birth control. I have never met a woman who came to this decision without a lot of personal anguish. Whatever drives their decision is theirs, and not a whimsical desire to keep living the single life. Well, maybe there are, but a) I’m glad they aren’t parentingthe child anyway and b) that is a serious minority that shouldn’t be representative of women in general.
I Hope next time you think about your stance on a woman’s choice you remember you don’t know the circumstances behind that choice. They could very wrll have been in your shoes, driven to make a choice they never thought they’d have to.
Please google a video a man took of people harrassing his wife. On youtube ynder “dad confronts abortion protesters”.
Apologies for such a long post, and not being able to embed the video. Love to all the women who have to make this choice.
I have no problem with someone personally being against abortion and thinking whatever about it. But I do have a problem with people who take their beliefs and try to enforce them on EVERYONE via the law.
Everyone’s situation is different, so my feeling is that everyone should have the options to make the best choice for themselves.
From a legal standpoint it just doesn’t make sense to criminalize abortion. I’m pro-life for me (and I’ve said before I’m iffy on kids so yes it’s a complicated view), but pro-choice for everyone else.
The problem is if you criminalize it, then you have a bunch of cases that you could prosecute and it would just be a complete and utter drain on our legal system. You have to decide the father’s right, the mother’s emotional state, the mother’s right, what she did, how much time would she serve if any, what about the doctor, etc, etc etc. Even limitations such as only having it when she’s raped or aborting a child that’s not fully developed are dumb. Because in the end it costs WAY more to do all that then to just legalize it.
I’d rather have my tax dollars spent on legalizing abortion then being used for that crap. And for that matter. If people want to limit abortions then educate kids on safe sex practices, introduce better state funded maternity programs, and take care of these kids once they come out of the womb. Make sure society shames dead beat dads because they are often the reason these kids are in the situations they are in, they were unwilling to take care of them.
Feel free to feel anyway about abortion that you want. If you believe it’s murder definitely TALK to your partner in the future to make sure you agree about these things. Definitely make sure you will always be prepared for kids. Definitely make sure that it’s not an option you close off either in the most terrible of circumstances (for example if your wife’s health is in danger). Ultimately, it’s the woman’s body and right to decide. If we’re looking at it from a religious standpoint. Others sins won’t affect yours, so let them sin as much as they want and get your free ride to heaven. (I sincerely hope this offends everyone).
This has to be a lesser of two evils argument. Unfortunately bad is gonna come from either way so might as well accept the way the least bad can come from. The least expensive route. The route that encourages women’s health. And the route that ensures a society that takes their choices and the consequences of those choices into their own hands by having all options available to them.
I personally think that everyone has the right to make their own decisions and their own choices. Bodies should not be regulated for the sake of a political soundbite. I personally could not imagine having an abortion. But I also can’t imagine being in the position where I would have to choose. I can’t imagine the pain that decision can place on a person. I have had friends go through it, but I myself have not (I’ve been lucky in that my birth control methods have not failed me.) So no, I cannot tell someone that their decision is wrong. But I can tell someone that decision might be wrong for me.
That being said, it’s always amazing how angry people get at those who do not subscribe to their views. We’re all entitled to our opinion and we’re all entitled to express it. I just think it’s sad that when someone posts an opinion that the majority don’t agree with, the viciousness occurs. So, Mark Ruffalo can have his opinion because it is in line with most of ours. He is applauded for it and no one is telling him to stay out of it because he doesn’t have a uterus. But Andrew is not given that same respect for his opinion. Sad, really.
Alexandra, Post its, Merritt, nerd … Are ya’ll gonna fake gay marry me for tackling this or what?
@Jennifer12, perhaps the women would not have spoken so harshly if Andrew had not called abortion a “selfish choice.” He could have just stated that he did not believe in abortion, but he took it a step further. He was not initiating a conversation on the matter, he was passing judgment on the women who are forced to make that very difficult and painful decision. He does not have that right.
If he wants to judge, he should prepare for the consequences.
I am a woman who had an abortion at 19. I do not regret my decision as I am 100% sure it was the right decision and one not made lightly. There was nothing selfish about my decision, I spent the better part of a week emotionally beating myself up to make sure I wasn’t terminating my pregnancy for selfish reasons. My option was to terminate or force a child to be born and watch it die during it’s short but painful existence. Doing the latter to assuage my ego and be able to make myself some sort of hero for not “murdering” my baby would have been selfish, cruel and inhumane. You don’t hear people telling a woman who chose to go to term and deliver a baby with a painful fatal condition that her actions were selfish, cruel and inhumane and how awful it was that she was making such a selfish decision to torture her child.
I personally know a lot of anti-choicers who had their abortions and, according to them, they didn’t think twice about it/it was for their own convenience or for some other self-described selfish reason. I know rabid antichoicers that came into a clinic in which I volunteered for their own abortions less than a week after protesting at another clinic and loudly proclaimed their situation was “different” and “they had no choice” while throwing shade at others (and, yeah, they were back out protesting – even at the clinic in which they terminated their own pregnancy – shortly thereafter knowing full well nobody could dime them out).
The decision regarding the whether to continue a pregnancy to term is a deeply personal MEDICAL decision. It is one that should be made by the person who is pregnant in consultation with the father (if he is in the picture), her physician and anyone else she (or the couple) invite to help them make that decision.
Goodie gumdrops for you Andrew. I am glad that if you are ever pregnant by accident that you will choose to have the baby. Here’s a cookie. Go away
As a nurse, and a woman, I understand the right to choose, BUT I believe there should be some boundaries in place. I completely disagree with abortion-on-demand at any point in the pregnancy. At some point, it crosses the line between what may be a “gray” area, if you will, and becomes blatant infanticide.
Abortion, at least in the first trimester, is never going to go away, so the Pro-life side needs to get over it. But should partial-birth abortion and other gruesome practices be legal? Of course not (WTF?!). Unfortunately, so many people are polarized to one side or the other, any room for agreeing to disagree, common sense and/or real debate, is lost in the dogma and rhetoric of BOTH sides (Pro-choice and Pro-life).
You have no idea what you are talking about. Absolutely no idea.
@Andrew:
Yeah, but it doesn’t affect you personally. Who cares if your neighbour has one or if the girl who makes your coffee has one. It doesn’t make an impact on YOUR life. But it makes an impact on theirs.
I am personally pro-choice. It doesn’t mean I mean I like abortion, or that I would have one myself. It just means I support women who decide that is what’s best for them. Some people are just not ready emotionally, mentally, physically or financially to have a child brought into the world. We all come from different walks of life and just because one thing works for one person, don’t mean it will work for another.
@ Moi, Well said! I don’t believe this is a black or while argument at all, and too many people treat it as one.
Andrew, you’re right that I know nothing about your religious beliefs…other than the ones you’ve implied in your post. if you mention “the body that the Lord created”, that sounds like a religion-based argument to me.
if you don’t have a religion that you follow, then don’t use “the Lord” as part of your argument. and don’t put forth an argument that people shouldn’t have abortions based on the idea that “the Lord” created the baby.
“I was just giving a reason why I believe abortion is wrong…my view on abortion is NOT because of my religion.”
sorry, but that makes no sense. you gave a reason (“the Lord” created the body) why you’re against it, and yet your religion ISN’T why you’re against it?
@andrew as a bi man who chooses and has the right to use his body to love whomever he wants freely, you should understand on some level that no one has the right to tell you how to.use your reproductive organs
The pro-life/anti-choice stance comes from a very different place than the pro-choice/anti-life movement. At it’s core, pro-life/anti-choice supporters see abortion as nothing less than murder. Period full stop end of discussion. Women’s rights and health don’t enter into the logic. Ruffalo’s essay is nicely written, but will probably not change a lot of people’s minds.
On a different topic, I do not think that someone’s sexual orientation, gender, or reproductive health bars him or her from voicing an opinion about the abortion issue. This is one thing we have to decide as a country. Thanks for sharing Andrew, you are brave to wander in.
Thank you (and many others) for an insightful post. I have definitely wandered in lol!
As a side note, I hope people realize that I’m not trying to completely change everyone’s minds about this. I understand that people have strong views on this subject, as do I, and I’m not going to try to change those views through an Internet forum.
I have to call this out.
At its core the anti-abortion movement has nothing to do with life or protecting children. If it did there would be more of an effort in the movement to assist struggling women, research fetal abnormalities, and help for born children.
The anti-abortion movement is about stripping women of agency, shaming women for being sexually active, and promoting medically inaccurate information.
If it was just a question of voicing an opinion I wouldn’t care. However, anti-abortion activists want to do more than that. Because taking away legal abortion won’t stop abortion. It just stop access to safe and legal ones. But the lives of women don’t count for them.
Andrew, this is a genuine question: do you think it should be the law that people have to donate bone marrow, blood, and their organs after they die, without ifs, buts or ands? Because if not, why not? All three are totally trivial compared to pregnancy and labour. In fact you’d probably be able to compare it to kidney donation – fancy mandating that? People die in all cases, if you don’t. But in all those cases people’s rights to decide what happens to their own bodies wins through. What’s the difference?
Pregnancy and birth are massive, demanding and actually still quite dangerous undertakings. 3/4 of women birthing vaginally will either tear or need their vaginas cut to allow the baby out, before it gets stitched up with a needle and twine, and that’s such a minor detail alongside the rest of the birthing process, people rarely even mention it. Does that give you some idea of the levels of pain we’re talking, here? A C section is major abdominal surgery. About half of women who birth vaginally will need TENA lady after menopause because their pelvic floors will have been damaged, and when the hormone changes occur, they lose bladder continence. And that’s with normal births – do you know what a rectocele is? I know someone who does, and someone else who had to have reconstructive surgery, because labour left her anally incontinent. Gross, but y’know, if we’re talking enforced reproduction, maybe time to get real? And if you honestly don’t know how traumatic adoption was for so many women, maybe you might educate yourself on that one. Because there was a documentary on elderly women who’d had to give their babies up a while ago, and I was sobbing by the end. I cannot begin to fathom pain like it. Thank God, I never will. They were old, and yet the grief was as raw as ever. They’d had to give up children because they had no options. How can that be better for them? And as most abortions happen in the very early stages, when the embryo is the size of a pea, how can you value that potential life ahead of women’s?
I’m a mother. Love being one, too. And I was relatively lucky on the reproduction front, myself. Nothing that wasn’t healable afterwards. But you know what: it has really reinforced my being pro-choice, because holy moly, is it a huge thing to deal with! Nobody should force someone else to do that. You are a man. You have no idea what you’re asking women to do.
@Andrew,
My problem with your original statement was when you stated abortion was a “selfish choice.” I respect your beliefs, but I cannot respect your passing judgment on those who don’t believe as you do. You asked us not to pass judgment on you, just allow those women the same courtesy.
Thank you.
It is not a child’s choice to be born to an unfit mother but it is also not the choice of a child to be conceived in the first place. The choice usually lies with the mother (except for rape victims)and father. People should make wiser decisions and use contraception so that an innocent child will not be conceived and then aborted because its parents have made poor choices and later punish the child for those poor choices. It’s as if people want to have their cake and eat it; have sex without taking proper precautions and then conveniently abort the child after it is conceived and one realizes that one actually doesn’t desire a child. Seems a bit selfish to me.
do you have any clue how often birth control methods fail? “With the Pill, the pregnancy rate with ‘typical use’ is about nine percent per year. With condoms, it’s between 18 and 21 percent.” source http://www.reuters.com/article/2012/04/27/us-women-pill-condom-idUSBRE83Q11Q20120427
You need to remember that not all decisions to abort are born out of poor choices, poor planning, etc. I was faced with having an abortion after doing everything “right.” My daughter was diagnosed with a lethal chromosomal abnormality – there was nothing I could have done differently. I chose not abort, but ultimately had to watch my beautiful daughter die after 1 month after struggling to survive.
Women should never have such an important decision taken away from them.
Even women faithfully using birth control get pregnant. And to expect 100% of people not wanting to get pregnant to practice abstinence is beyond ridiculous. Not every pregnancy is an unmarried high schooler not using birth control.
I wholeheartedly agree. I adore him for writing this and for having the courage of his convictions!
I agree. Regardless of anyone’s personal opinion (I was never faced with that choice, but I personally couldn’t imagine having an abortion), it’s a woman’s right to have access to the option. The alternative is too ghastly and any self-rightous person insisting abortion is wrong, is basically saying women should be treated like garbage. It’s going to happen. It should be humane.
Rdj needs to join him! Science bros could get a lot of people actively fighting for the pro choice side.
oooh I’m liking the Mark Scruffalo look.
On a serious note I applaude him for standing up for a woman’s right to choose and for letting us in on what happen with his mother. That was very personal but he shared it to show his sincerity for the cause. I knew there was a reason I always loved him.
Yes, this only stands to reinforce my high regard for him.
And I absolutely agree with Kaiser about the organizing of the modern feminist movement.
I agree with both of you, the more I know of him, the more I respect him and his curls. kidding, seriously though I love his curls.
Anyway, I appreciate this letter and the support he lends to the situation. It’s sad that in this day and age we’re still fighting over our uterus.
“Scruffalo”! Good one!
It’s always nice when sensible people make cogent arguments, no matter on which side of the coin they fall. Just glad he’s on the right side!
Okay. I think I’ve fallen in love.
I know, right!
Just when I thought I couldn’t adore him any more, he steps up and articulately puts a voice to this cause.
Agree. I commend his decision to support this cause.
Well done, Mr. Ruffalo. While I’m very sorry for what his mother had to go through, I think it’s important that he tells her story. This is an aspect of te fight for reproductive rights that is often overlooked- that making it harder to get an abortion won’t make women STOP seeking them out if they need one- it only makes it dangerous. Medical procedures should not be performed in hotel rooms for a few hundred bucks, cash. No woman should have to put herself, her life, and her body in peril to make a choice about her own self, life, and body.
Good for Mark for speaking out- and you’re right, Kaiser, we need more like him in this fight.
+1 for this post. What Mark’s mother went through is the reason why abortion needs to stay legal in this country. Making it illegal is not going to stop abortions, it’s just going to force women to go to the back alley providers that unsanitary and dangerous.
Look up what Kenneth Gosnell did in Philadelphia, that story was awful & this happened in a time when abortion was legal.
I applaud Mark for speaking out and sharing his mother’s story-it’s not a story that is often shared.
“This is an aspect of te fight for reproductive rights that is often overlooked- that making it harder to get an abortion won’t make women STOP seeking them out if they need one- it only makes it dangerous.”
Such a good point, and I think it is lost on a lot of people.
Mark, you now have a devoted fan. I’m deeply touched by his essay. He’s right about even now, there’s a stigma associated with a woman right to choose. There should never be shame to take your own health and life in your own hands. I could go on about this. But I’m deeply moved by Mark’s input and support towards women’s health and her rights as a human being.
Much Respect. Please come to Texas.
Good for him. And could you please not call it an “abortion clinic” in Mississippi? Women’s reproductive health clinics do a hell of a lot more than only provide abortions. “Abortion clinic” comes from the anti-choice side as a way of demonizing the places that do this work.
Good point!
I know where I have lived, places like Planned Parenthood were where many high school and college aged women got yearly exams and birth control pills at affordable prices.
Do the women in Mississippi have access to clinics where they can get inexpensive exams and birth control? Or is this one clinic it for them?
The folks at Planned Parenthood have screened me for kidney infections and provided me a referral to the hospital when I have been super sick – even in recent years. I do not have health insurance and have had kidney problems for years. I appreciate their ‘easy access to medical care’ approach and wish it for all women, everywhere. Sad for the gals of Mississippi.
Nicegirl, wow! I am so glad PP was there for you. I think a lot of people would be surprised to hear that they helped you with kidney problems, as they are portrayed in the media as a very different type of organization.
I am forever grateful to Planned Parenthood as well. My family has a high rate of reproductive organ related cancers, and they gave me screenings and ultrasounds during that time when I was no longer on my parents’ insurance and before I was able to get my own.
They do so much more that just perform that one procedure! I feel for the women in Mississippi as well. I wish you all the best with your health. Hugs! 🙂
He gets it. He totally gets it. I’m so tired of this debate focusing on the procedure instead of the bigger picture of depriving women of their personal autonomy. Bravo Mr. Ruffalo.
This!
Yes!
I always thought Mark Ruffalo, unlike may Hollywood types who would sell their own grandmother, seemed like a thoroughly decent human being.
This letter confirms it!
The idea that someone could dictate what medical procedures I can and can’t have in my own belly just really disturbs me. It just feels so invasive.
Tiffany, thank you so much for your kindness.
I DO NOT LIKE TO PROMOTE ORGANIZATIONS as a rule – BUT – Drexel University has a really cool program, it is nationwide. It is called VISION2020. It is a coalition of folks, regular citizens and businesses, who are working together with people in every state, including the Institute for Women’s Health and Leadership, united on the cause of women’s equality – “united in the commitment to achieve women’s social and economic equality”. Basically, 2020 is the 100 year anniversary of the 19th Amendment, and we want EQUALITY FOR ALL WOMEN by then (um – yeah, right!?? a large goal!).They have real plans in every state to educate women and MEN on the battle for equality. They are COOL. Their website tag line is “VISION 2020: Equality in Sight”. I have actually attended one of their events in my own state and I think they are TOP NOTCH. Their information is online at: http://www.drexel.edu/vision2020
It is inspiring and exciting stuff!
That is my dream. All women safe and
healthy.
PS. Hello CB – please accept my most sincere apologies if I am not supposed to put another website on your comment section. I read the rules and truly do not wish to be in violation of your comment policy whatsoever. I love CB!
As if he didn’t already make me drool. Now I’m sitting up and begging at my screen.
Spot on, Science bro. Keep fighting the good fight–need you out there.
Bravo. There’s a book called THE WORST OF TIMES about the days of illegal abortions. It is all testimonials from the women, their children, doctors, lawyers, police officers and others affected by illegal abortion.
It’s unfortunately out of print, but used copies are available online. It is a powerful reminder of the importance of legal abortion.
Exactly. When abortion is illegal, the number of abortions performed is not reduced, but the number of women who die from them is dramatically increased.
Nor is there a reduction in the number of abortions had by the elicit sex partners of those who preach god & family.
Ugh, illicit NOT elicit
Such a good point, Bettyrose. I read that page that is probably still out there called something like “the only moral abortion is my abortion” and it showed just how twisted some of these people are to think that it’s wrong for others, but since they are good people, it’s okay. One girl insisted that she wasn’t like the “Godless whores” in the waiting room, so Jesus would forgive her. Yeah, selfishness, narcissism, hypocrisy, and judgment are what Jesus was all about!
@ MaiGirl, I have a friend who chose to have an abortion 25 years ago. She is now a very vocal anti-choice (I just CANNOT call them pro-life!) advocate. Personally, I don’t agree with abortion because of my religious beliefs. However, I know that not everyone shares my beliefs, and this country is not supposed to make laws based on those same beliefs. (If it did, then everyone would accept the Pope as our Holy Father!) Each woman should be able to make her own decisions that are the best for her.
I read an article in Rolling Stone about Dr. Tiller, and it really opened my eyes. When people talk about “late term” abortions, they fail to realize that many of the fetus aren’t developing properly. Women going to doctor Tiller had babies without faces, lungs, vital organs, parts of their brains, etc. Why make a child be born only so it can suffocate? Why make a woman carry a child who is already dead, putting her life at risk of toxicity?
Exactly! It seems like those who are vociferously anti-abortion never think about those kinds of circumstances. I’m in my early 40’s and know at least four women who aborted much-wanted babies due to severe genetic abnormalities or birth defects. None of them wanted an abortion, but none of them felt equipped to (in the best cases) bring a severely disabled child into the world or (in the worst cases) carry to term a baby that would die moments after birth. Even if anti-abortion laws contain provisions for genetic abnormalities, the process of getting a petition approved would likely force more women to have very late-term abortions, because many of these abnormalities aren’t detected until about halfway through pregnancy. Add another month to resolve a legal claim, and suddenly we’re looking at a bunch of abortions after 24 weeks. Not good. Abortion needs to be kept legal, so the right decision can be made at the right time by the woman, her partner and their doctor, period.
“Abortion needs to be kept legal, so the right decision can be made at the right time by the woman, her partner and their doctor, period.”
Well said!
And I think the story about the women you know is so important. As I am getting older, I am becoming more aware of the many tragic ways that pregnancies can be complicated. As a girl my view on abortion completely lacked this understanding. I feel this information is vitally important to the conversation about this issue.
He has proven himself to be a wonderful man in every interview and now this! The women in his life are very lucky to have him. Thank you Mark Ruffalo for standing up for women’s rights! Bravo!
I thought his letter was awesome. I dont think some people understand what happens when they can not legally terminate their unwanted pregnancies in a safe and regulated environment. I’ve read horror stories about back alley abortions. I couldnt imagine living in a country where that was my only option.
Obviously using birth control would prevent this situation but not everyone has access to even that. The freedom of choice laws were passed for a reason, time to accept it and keep the government and religious nuts out of the individuals body and life’s rights.
Macey,
I had a doctor prescribe an antibiotic which interrupted the pill. He knew I was on the pill, but I assumed he was smart enough to not use one of the two antibiotics that interrupt it.
Nothing is 100%
I think she was referring to general BC, i.e. the pill, condoms, IUD, etc., not specifically the birth control pill.
@Lem
You are correct,I was talking about bc in general. but what she said is another perfect example of why it needs to stay legal b/c not all BC is full proof.
Just when I thought I couldn’t love this man even more.
He really is lovely, in spite of (or maybe because of) tough times. He’s had health scares, his brother’s awful death and it’s a credit to him that he has continued to tackle tough and not always popular issues.
Are you going to be doing an article about Lee Thompson Young? He’s the Rizzoles and Isles actor who completed suicide 🙁
I will take one of him, please.
“I actually trust the women in my life.” The end. That’s it and that’s all, folks.
I also like “no uterus, no opinion”.
I loved that and honestly that’s what it comes down to. Women deserve to be trusted to make the right decisions for themselves.
Personally all the women I know are more then capable to do so.
I’ve just suffered a miscarriage so this is a little raw for me.
But that was beautifully written and he made amazing points.
I didn’t know I was pregnant so I didn’t get to make a choice, but the idea of not having one is terrifying.
I hope freedom and choice will win.
I’m sorry for your loss. My best friend had a miscarriage when she first began trying to get pregnant but now they have a one month old baby girl.
Thank you Val.
I’m more shocked than anything at the moment. I was on the pill but as I posted above, got wrongly prescribed an interfering antibiotic and didn’t know.
I hope that these places stay open because other careful women could end up pregnant (no BC is 100%) and nobody should be punished for that.
LOVE!!
Nothing hotter in a man than feminism. Let’s say this loudly from the rooftops.
Amen to that.
I applaud everything he said. It’s about choice – I suddenly feel very lucky to live in England. My heart breaks for some of the recent tragedies in Ireland where abortions were refused in hospitals and the women died.
Everything I learn about him, I love.
“Because I actually trust the women I know.” Wow, that really says a lot, doesn’t it? And says even more about the people who don’t think women should have that choice.
Really? So if I am pro life I am anti a women’s right to choose? What kind of logic is that fact is its not logic and nothing but playing on emtionalism and the victim ploy which is disgusting and actually sexist. It’s sexist because you want your idea of choice to be the only choice for a women. Which is a absolute and is a anti “choice”…
What are you talking about?
Sorry, but you make no sense. The choice is in your decision to have an abortion or carry a pregnancy to term. How does one woman’s choice to have an abortion rob you of your decision to carry a pregnancy to term? It does not. However, the war on reproductive freedom seeks to deny choice. It seeks to tell every woman that they must carry a pregnancy to term.It wants to tell me what I can and cannot do with my uterus. It wants to make your choice, the anti-abortion view, the only choice and you’re right there is no logic in the denial of women’s reproductive freedom. Patriarchy and the failure to fully extricate government from religious agendas jeopardizes women and their reproductive freedom every single day.
So if I am pro life I am anti a women’s right to choose?
Yes, you are.
You’re talking at cross-purposes. To be pro-choice means that it’s each and every woman’s personal choice to either terminate or go full-term, and if she chooses termination then she should be allowed to terminate without war breaking out between the two factions as if they somehow hold the key to what all woman can or cannot do.
“It’s sexist because you want your idea of choice to be the only choice for a women.”
You are ignoring the fact that “choice” means more than 1 option. 1 of the options here is keeping the baby. Being pro-choice does not mean there is only one option (aka abortion).
I think you know this already, though.
I don’t really understand your comment, but I don’t think you understood mine either.
I’m saying that those who want to legally take away the medical rights of women don’t trust women to make decisions about their own health, body, and well being.
Nobody is suggesting forcing every pregnant woman to abort. That would be anti-choice, because it’s the opposite of forcing every pregnant woman to carry to term. That is why the Chinese one-child policy, which did force abortion, was so appalling.
Want to absolutely reject abortion for yourself? Absolutely, I support you all the way. I also support better welfare provision for moms in crisis pregnancies, because a forced choice is no choice. But that goes both ways. The CHOICE should be real, and that means both options made possible, and supported.
If you want to ban abortion, then you are the one trying to decide for other women. You don’t have that right.
What a great letter. It says it all.
I still can’t believe that abortion is still such an issue in America. Here in Europe it’s an entirely private matter and the women have a right to choose instead in the US it’s used as a political weapon. Disgusting.
Why aren’t more celebrity speaking on this matter?
As an american woman, it’s really frustrating/infuriating that my health and my choices about my health are somehow a political issue. It’s not political at all– it’s just used as a political tool to appease people who have greater concern for my personal life (of which they have no business) than tending to their own pathetic lives. I should never be legally forced to have/not have any procedure that I want/need. It’s insane that somehow that is ethically acceptable.
+1000
It depends what part of Europe.
There are lots of catholic countries where abortion is still an issue and the laws are even stricter than in the US, like Ireland.
Exactly, even as late as the early ’90’s it was illegal for condoms to be sold to anyone in Ireland but married couples, and then only with a prescription.
I was born in Ireland and then spent most of my 20’s there. I saw the pain and anguish my cousin went through when her twins were discovered to be highly, highly disabled in the womb. As in, no quality of life whatsoever would be available for these children, were they even to survive to the birth.
So naturally she had to fly to London for the procedure, which believe me, she AGONIZED over. And of course which costed tens of thousands as well (which is the least important aspect but still daunting!)
And then to fly home to a country where she couldn’t even tell anyone what happened, had to lie about everything, for fear of being shunned and hated! Its just horrible. Do people forget that abortion is not only used for accidental pregnancy? And this is why it CANNOT be illegal?!
Abortion is incredibly easy to obtain in Ireland because it’s so close to England (it’s only a couple of hundred miles between Dublin and London) and seriously cheap to get there. Women just go and get treated by a reproductive charity like BPAS or Marie Stopes. (If they can’t afford it and take proof of income, they don’t get charged either.)
Always makes me raise my eyebrows when anti-choicers use Ireland as an example of how banning abortion doesn’t result in lots of backstreet abortions/deaths. Ireland hasn’t banned abortion. It’s just outsourced it.
So much wrong with this I don’t know where to start. Institutional racism has been abolished? Easy for a white guy to say. Saddest of all is the notion that a woman must be allowed to kill her child in order to be seen equal to a man.
Oh yes, killing a child exactly equals the removal of an entity that is not viable outside of the uterus. It is exactly the same thing, right? Oh, wait . . .
Wow, you made a few jumps there, eh? First off, “institutional racism” is much different than societal racism and was indeed abolished. It means there can’t be any overtly racist laws, ie segregation.
Secondly, more women AND babies die when abortion is illegal. People are going to have abortions, legal or not, so driving it underground only makes it less safe. Don’t like it? Don’t have one, but don’t try to make your views into law. That ain’t freedom.
Nerd Alert, so many good points (as usual!)
1. “Institutionalized” is key to his point about racism. To remove it changes the entire meaning of what he was saying.
2. Infant Mortality rates are lowest in countries that have access to abortion (in addition to other aspects like sex ed and health care). The US currently has the highest infant mortality rate of all industrialized countries. In fact, the US has “50 percent more first-day deaths than all other industrialized countries combined”. The US is ranked #30 (#1 being the lowest rate in the world).
Couple of points he didn’t say racism was gone he was referring to the legal established racist laws like segregation. Everyone knows racism is still a problem but it is no longer legally sanctioned for the most part, it still needs to get better.
And as for killing your child well that is up for debate and I won’t get into it. However, for women to be considered equal yes our reproductive organs and rights should not be threatened. And our preventative and reproductive treatment should be covered by insurance, especially when all of men’s are and no one is holding them accountable for these unwanted pregnancies.
It’s none of mine or your business what a woman does with their bodies, but frankly the government should be passing the multiple job, gun control and environmental bills the president has sent for vote and stay the hell away from my uterous!!
Firstly get a new name, Cel is taken!
Secondly, I agree with other posters – a women’s body and her right to decide what happens to it/with it should be her choice and her choice alone.
It’s not even about killing her “child”, It’s about autonomy and women being able to make their own health and life choices.
Seriously smart man. Seriously thoughtful letter. Seriously brave move.
Not many actors come out to support pro-choice causes these days, probably because Hollywood and the media have become so bump-crazy and baby-crazy over the past few years. I admire him.
He is awesome. It is important for both women and men to stand up and support a woman’s right to reproductive freedom.
I love this guy. Everything about him, I love. Not to mention that male feminists are HOT.
Bravo. Let’s face it, no woman in her right mind considers an abortion as “family planning”. it’s a last resort measure which, even when performed in a hospital, has health risks. Making it illegal means that more women will die or become unable to have children at all, after an abortion gone bad. And it still won’t save said fetus.
While I’d agree that women don’t view abortion as family planning, abortion carries fewer health risks than carrying a pregnancy to term & childbirth.
I love him even more. Bravo for this thoughtful essay.
Mark Ruffalo , even Your next movie is biggest flop than Heaven’s Gate I will watch that one.Thank You!!!
This might be controversial, but here goes anyway: I’m bothered by the way Ruffalo says he “trusts” the women in his life to make these choices. Doesn’t it seem like he’s still using the language of patriarchy here; the man is giving permission to women because he trusts them. The women’s rights movement has been all about bringing women fully into equal citizenship rights with men. His “trusting” comment still makes women second-class citizens, and ultimately breaking down the structures of second-class citizenship is what abortion rights are all about.
I see what you mean, but I don’t think he means that if he didn’t trust them, he’d have a right to say that they do with their bodies. It’s more of a “you’re in a better position to know what’s best for you than anyone else, including myself” kind of trust– which is what is afforded to men with regards to their health.
At some point it has to be explicitly said imo because no one prominent is saying it, and it might be the crux of ‘the other side’.
What often bothers me is this selfishness and unethicalness that these pro-lifers talk about. They say that women will make bad choices, and therefor cannot be trusted to make such choices, so take the choice away. Now that is basis for creating second-class citizens to me.
The reason he is saying her “trusts women” is because it is very clear that anti-abortion lawmakers, protesters, etc don’t trust women.
There is a reason why one of the common pro-choice slogans is “trust women”.
Men are trusted to make healthcare decisions. However women are talked down to by both the law, society and the media. Which is why we have forced ultrasound laws, laws that make sure women know that abortion ends a pregnancy (wtf?), laws that force doctors to tell women about risks that are not even scientifically accurate, etc.
The anti-abortion movement is founded on the principle that women should not be trusted to make decisions.
Then we women must change the language of the debate. Men don’t need to be “trusted” because they have full equality. The real challenge is not abortion rights but the full inclusion of women within the paradigm of citizenship. I’d never say to Ruffalo or any American, you know, I “trust” you to speak freely so therefore you have the right to free speech.
That’s nice. He also believes that 9/11 was a massive government conspiracy.
Just saying.
It was.
I am all for a woman’s right to choose. However, when you are using abortion as a form of birth control that is when I have a problem. When you have had several of them and then later can’t have children b/c of it don’t come crying to me. I only say this b/c I know someone that plays this card constantly. If you accidentally got pregnant and don’t want it, fix it. Do what you have to do but do not bitch about how it affected your life later. Your choice, you deal with it.
Thank you Mark Ruffalo.
A very important essay. For those interested in the subject, I recommend the reading of a novel called When she woke, written by Hillary Jordan. She imagines an America where abortion has been made illegal. Part of the punishment is being “chromed”, that is the skin color is genetically altered (red for abortion, yellow for thieves etc..)
We follow the destiny of a young woman going through this ordeal. Very thought provoking.
And thank you to the author of this post for the term “anti choice” advocates. They are NOT pro life.
I’m pro choice. It is not up to me to tell a woman what to do with her body.
GOD DAMN IT MARK RUFFALO STOP MAKING ME LOVE YOU SO MUCH.
And you are so fucking right, Kaiser. That’s one of the problems I’ve had with the organization of the Feminist Movement, even though I consider myself to be a hardcore feminist myself. One thing I hate is the term “pro-feminist”. You’re either a feminist or not. If you’re for feminism, then you’re a feminist. The whole idea of a term being invented around the idea that a man can’t be a feminist because he’s a man is just insulting bullshit and anti-gender equality. The LGBTQIA movement has done so well because it doesn’t do that exclusion shit. The women’s movement excludes too much and bickers too much. It’s alienating to so many people and it’s why feminism gets such a bad rep when it shouldn’t.
I had my first child at 18. While I am so blessed to have her in my life and I have never regretted the decision to have her and raise her, I will always be thankful that I had the CHOICE to have her or not. I went on to work in the ER for years & I have seen the result of back room abortions (in Mississippi I might add) and it is terrifying. Women have a RIGHT and that right is to have a choice.
+1
I’m a woman and I totally disagree with abortion unless the woman has been raped. Other then that there are things called condoms and birth control, you can pick either one or both. Some women use abortion as a form of birth control and that disgusting.
Right and condoms are fail proof! Never break. Never any accidents.
What about the states that have banned sex ed in school, make it near impossible to get access to birth control? Just too bad on those girls I guess.
And you claim only in cases of rape should an abortion be legal. What about the women’s health / life?? Any chance of an abortion there or are a bunch of cells more important than the woman?
Tabby, your body, your choice. My body, my choice. When your condom and birth control fails, you are free to make your own choice. Every woman should be FREE to make her own choice.
Your choice about YOUR body is YOUR choice. My choice about MY body is MY choice.
what about a woman who used birth control and it failed?
is she allowed to have one?
what about a woman who’s life is in danger if she carried to term?
is she allowed to have one?
what about a teenager who was scared to talk to her parents about birth control, or didn’t have access to it?
is she allowed to have one?
there are other circumstances besides rape that would lead a person to have an abortion, outside of the simple “use it as birth control”.
if you trust a woman who was raped to make the best choice for herself, then you have to trust EVERY OTHER WOMAN who makes that choice as well.
So your real problem is women having consensual sex then? That is on of the true hypocrisies of those you say they are okay with it in the cases of rape or incest. Being against abortion is just another part of slut-shaming women for being sexually active.
Condoms and contraception are great. Too bad that we live in a society where many refuse to support sex ed. Children and teens who not educated become uneducated adults.
Also condoms and hormonal contraception don’t help if there is actually a medical issue that affects the life of the woman or if there are fetal abnormalities.
I always see people making these grand claims about women who use abortion as birth control. However the actual data doesn’t support that.
Haha, show me a woman who´s preferred choice of birth control is abortion.
Do you think someone want´s to have an abortion unless it´s absolutely necessary?
I was trying to articulate my mixed feelings about abortion when I saw this thread. This conversation is basically the issue I have when it comes to discussing abortion-no one ever really discusses it and so nothing gets solved.
It’s not fair to say that abortion should “just be a medical procedure” just as it’s not fair to say “it should be banned.” There are many compelling (and correct) arguments for each side.
I support abortion on principle and I believe that I don’t get the right to make decisions for people I am not caring for. I am also one of those people that had a baby “on accident” (birth control that was recalled) but, in truth, don’t have sex if you don’t want a baby (sorry). I support better sex education because some people DO get pregnant because they don’t know how to use prophylactics but at the same time we all need to step up and be responsible for ourselves and our bodies.
As much as I agree with Mr. Ruffalo’s letter, the legality of abortion is only one piece of the puzzle. We need to make sure our daughters are also making sound decisions in the first place. Abortion, as much as I’m ok with people getting one, is really a last resort and I (like Tabby) know several (grown) women that are hooking up with random guys and then being shocked (Shocked!) when this guy doesn’t want a baby with them. Some keep their babies. Others don’t.
I have a close friend that was in a relationship and then her husband left her (with no intention to return-he moved out of state with his girlfriend) and she did not feel she was in a position to be a single mother and got an abortion. I ALSO have a friend that has three children (and a few abortions) with the same man and continues having sex with him despite his professing no interest in her or their children. She literally sees him every few months and brings him home from the bar only to have him leave again.
In some cases I understand the decision for an abortion and can agree with it. Unfortunately, the word ‘disgusting’ IS applicable in certain situations and we need to concede that point.
No we don’t have to concede that point. What exactly makes it so “disgusting” in your opinion? It is disgusting to make abortion illegal. Women dying because they were denied an abortion like Savita in Ireland last year. She was miscarrying and became septic. And they just let her die. Or the teenager who died in the Dominican Republic, she was denied a life saving abortion, she had cancer but that didn’t matter. What is disgusting is the blatant disregard for women’s lives. That is what will happen if abortion continues to be restricted.
I don’t think what women choose to do with their own bodies is disgusting at all. I think it’s absolutely none of my business. Period.
No, actually. Women don’t really do that. Birth control is cheaper and easier than abortion. It’s also easier on the body than abortion and much easier to access.
And yes, I’m aware that somebody ALWAYS knows someone who knew someone who did that, but no. Sorry. Nobody does that. Find me someone who habitually uses abortion as birth control, I want to talk to her. I want to meet this ONE WOMAN who is making it so hard for people in the South to have abortions, because so far, she is a myth.
@Nerd Alert
When they find this mythical woman she will probably be hanging with mythical doctors who are in it for the money. Never mind that abortion costs a fraction of what a natural birth does and far far less than a C-Section. And that ob-gyns can earn far more money off a birth than an abortion, and they also don’t have a bounty on their head.
Or the mythical teens who can afford to buy multiple doses of Plan B at one time.
The ridiculous stories and lies people make up about reproductive healthcare are astounding.
What else can I say…Amazing letter!
Awesome! I hope this will make more men support the pro choice movement.
I have tears in my eyes. Love you, Mark
It’s great he’s is speaking up for this cause. Women need to have the right to choose. Abortion may not be the right choice for one person but it may be for someone else. I have talked to women who’ve had abortions and they’ve all said it was one of the toughest decisions they made. I think it’s more selfish to bring a child into the world you can’t take care of. Most importantly I think women should be able to do what they want with their bodies.
The problem is that the pro-choice movement doesn’t give ALL THE FACTS – which is that it HARMS the woman’s body. I am pro-health.
Uh, source? where does a reputable report say that all abortions harm a woman’s body?
Legal abortion is safer than giving birth.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/22270271
Surprise, surprise, no source to back up this bs statement.
I’ve never had a strong opinion on him either way, but after reading the article when I saw the pictures, suddenly I thought: wow, he’s soo good looking. I’ve had a similar experience when watching Cory Monteiths “straight but not narrow” video, before I found him kind of boring and afterwards supercute. Apparently being a good person makes men more attractive to me:-)
First of all some of you keep making this mistake….pro choice does not mean anti life. It means a choice! Birth control fails… Alot of it is hormonal and sometimes it just doesn’t work for certain people. Sometime there are things make it not work like a prescription a doctor gives you.
Also if you need to provide birth control much easier! The fact that the pro life group also gets rid of sex ed and then blasts a woman who gets an abortion is baffeling.
Guess what people? There are real life consequences to adult behavior. That’s the chance you take when you have sex. You shouldn’t be having sex if you can’t handle the consequences.
Hey, you are very correct in a way. But I find it very strange how difficult it is to even get birth control in the states. I personally don’t agree with abortion in every circumstance, but I also don’t agree with people making choices for other women. I think thats what really bugs me about this whole debate, you can’t get an abortion but they won’t let you get decent birth control either. Or some of the terrible sex ed in certain places. You are 100% correct that people need to deal with their concequences but they arent even teaching what they actually are to kids.
I am not sure I,am explaining myself well but I hope you and other are understanding what I am trying to say. Also please excuse my terrible typing, my phone is being weird.
Megan,
You have to keep in mind that in the US for many years in many states, girls were only offered “abstinence only” sex education. They were not taught how their reproductive system works. They have state laws that try to shut down access to sources of birth control and information like Planned Parenthood. You had pharmacists and doctors denying birth control to unmarried women. Even now some employers are trying to reserve the right to deny birth control from being prescribed through an employee’s health insurance policy!
If all women in the US were given comprehensive sex education, access to afforable birth control, etc., you would have a much more compelling point.
I think we should actually give women a chance and give them the scientific information that goes along with that behavior that is not just “adult”…it is “human” too.
And there it is. The reduction of a human life to a “consequence” in order to defend the sacred human life in question.
Babies are more than a little consequence.
As an American woman I should have the right to decide what to do with my body, I don’t want ANYONE, politician, right to life activist or stranger, deciding what’s right for my body. My feeling if the fetus can live outside of my body without needing me for life then it’s a person, if it needs me to survive then technically it’s a part of me that I have the right to make choices for myself. I wish some of these people would take the time to help out children that are already alive and living in our child services program or the ones that can’t be adopted because of age, race or handicap, but no they are to busy trying to control my life. If you don’t believe in abortion don’t have one, if I want to have one that’s my business.
I believe the last pro choice law to pass was Roe v. Wade. After that, pro life has been gain ground. I shouldn’t be considered a villain just because I am not ready to be a mother. And before any of you yell adoption, that is still a decision made by a mother.
I was going to respond to some other commenter upthread to correct what i believe are some logical facilies, but then reading through this just made me sad. I am sad for all the women in the US who are having to fight for such an important right. Your reproductive decisions should be yours alone, not the government’s and not some lobby group’s. I hope the men and women who are fighting to maintain legal abortion know that they have a lot of allies in other countries who think they are very brave and are cheering them on.
🙂
I am against abortion done because of the reasons people here say they are favourable.
I am a supporter of abortion in certain circumstances, I list only three examples: rape, health problems and problems with the fetus.
I am 100% supporter of all the best contraception methods available and hysterectomy/vasectomy.
Sex education should be obligatory from now on for girls so when a woman comes with the excuse in the future that she didn’t know how to protect herself she becomes a suspicious matter.
I’ve heard opinions that investing money on sex education is a mistake because girls lose their knowledge during sex each one decides which reasons is worth the sacrifice of getting pregnant.
Getting pregnant is a choice the woman has made so why kill the fetus when she should have killed the opportunity in first place? Why do women who don’t want to be pregnant give the power to men during sex?
What to do about the issues of abandoned children and messed up kids?
What to do indeed, Cassie.
Are you just throwing up your hands and tossing that question off into the ether? Or do you have a suggestion? Because if you have a plan I’d love to hear it. There are plenty of kids, here and now, who could use it.
I don’t have one either, for the record. But I believe that adding to the problem by making abortion available only within a very narrow set of parameters that fits your moral view isn’t really going to help the situation, either.
Comprehensive sex ed SHOULD be obligatory, but in the US it is not.
Mark Ruffalo, you sexy beast!
Any agency trying to control women’s reproductive organs is trying to control women through them.
how is it possible for this topic to be such a turn off and simultaneously turning me on with what Ruffalo thinks?
On a shallow note, I love Mark with facial hair and messy curls and longer hair. He looks hot.
As a Canadian it just pisses me off that this is still going on in the US! When is it going to stop? I’m glad that my friend was able to get an abortion at 17 when a baby would have ruined her life
My two-cents: abortion is the taking of a life. That said, I support a woman’s right to choose to do that because the reasons are varied, many and personal. If there is moral judgment to be passed on it, it’s not my place to pass it. Women have been aborting unwanted pregnancies for thousands of years. In the past, those methods were barbaric and dangerous. Accepting the fact that women will abort unwanted pregnancies whether legal or not and moral or not, one might as well make it safe and legal. If you morally object, then don’t have one or perform one. I sympathize with the millions of people who morally oppose abortion and do not want to be made complicit by having their tax dollars used for abortions. I understand. But by the same token, there are millions of people who morally oppose war who are made complicit by having their tax dollars used to fund wars. Unfortunately, we don’t get to pick and choose. The choices we make in life speak to our circumstances. Taking responsibility for them speaks to our character.
I love him…he truly is an advocate for ALL people.
He has been an opponent of well fracking and attended a rally in Dimock, PA. to support the residents who had been without clean water for months due to natural gas seeping into the water supply. He brought the issue to the media, and something was finally done.
He really is a super-hero!
as I was trying to convey, I have never read a more eloquent letter on the topic
I love this dude soooooooo much.
he’s turned into vincent d’onofrio
Andrew, Here’s why you have received some nasty responses to your opinion.
+Most women would not want to have an abortion.
+Most women would feel EXTREME guilt, shame and horror over being in the position of even having to CONSIDER an abortion. It does not help that 1/2 of society considers them murderers. Most women do not want to be murderers.
+Most of the women who have abortions do so because they have no other option – IE they cannot afford a child, they were raped, they are unable to care for a child and so on. It is not because they are just selfish dumb sl*ts who want their cake and eat it too.
When you call somebody SELFISH when they are in this sort of position, it sets off flight and fight responses. It is cruel to call somebody selfish when they are faced with a position like this. Some women will ignore, others will fight. Which is what you have just experienced.
Personally, I think it is the epitome of ignorance to call a woman in this position selfish. In most cases it is not selfish. What is selfish, is bringing a child into the world, knowing full well that they will face either abuse, neglect, lack of care, disadvantage etc. It is the opposite of selfish to want to protect a child from that kind of life. Nobody makes the choice of abortion lightly… And abuse, neglect, disadvantage – all these contribute to the SIGNIFICANT amount of social problems that we face today > Social problems that need to solved, not added to. Maybe you should educate yourself before you make comments like these.
Not to mention the problem with bringing “The Lord” into this.
In case you haven’t noticed, everybody has a different opinion on what the lord approves of. Many people would throw you under the bus and say that you are a godless heathen for being bi-sexual. (that’s not my opinion). Others would say god loves all. If there even if a god (we have zero proof of that – personal opinion does not count as proof), who speaks for God? You say God wouldn’t approve of abortion, but he would approve of bi-sexuality? Others would say the opposite. Bringing god into it is a stupid argument that shows how closed minded you are. To me, it says that you can’t make up your own valid argument so you just refer to this invisible, questionable entity called God that may or may not exist. Just my opinion.
It’s so refreshing to hear the opinions of pro choice and pro life people. You guys are lucky to even have that option.
Here in the Philippines, our religion of the people is predominantly Catholic. The priests and bishops are very influential in government. So when a woman gets pregnant, either by consensual sex, rape, or a failed birth control, the only two choices are to continue or to continue.
It doesn’t matter if it’s her first or her fifteenth. Abortion in this country is out of the question. And if we do have an illegal one, society will never forgive us. ourselves, our children, and our children’s children will be stigmatized. Nobody will dare pass a bill for abortion, lest he/she wants to be branded as a cold blooded murderer.
The only situation where we can terminate a pregnancy is when it’s already threatening the mother’s life (ectopic pregnancy, etc). Other than that, even if your child has a severe genetic disorder, abnormality, whatnot, you will have to continue. The only thing we promote here is family planning through condoms, IUDs, vasectomies, OCPs, etc, but even the church is against it, since they claim that pills “kill” fetuses, which is quite honestly the most stupid argument I have ever heard.
Although I am personally against abortion, I am not here to judge or castigate anyone who did. I would just like to enlighten you guys on the different situations women face in other countries.
With love,
Goddess
Women are having abortions in your country, they are just much more difficult to access and secretive. That is what the religious, conservative right is trying to do in the U.S.
Those who are pro-life are the first to want to get rid of welfare!
And defend George Zimmerman
If only more men were like him…*sigh*
I had an abortion. It was legal and almost completely free , it doesn´t make me feel any better. Seeing the other women sitting in the waiting room, the pain in their eyes, I can tell you it is no choice. It is mostly the only option.
I get everyone’s arguments about how having and/or raising a child is difficult.
What I don’t understand is how killing a baby is OK.
Then you should research the development process of a fertilized embryo.
An egg does not become a human life as soon as it is fertilized.
With a bazillion kids of Birth control I can’t understand why we even need abortion any more.
I have a pretty strong opinion. I believe abortion before the first trimester should be an option, also nonviables.
Personally, I think it’s a grisly and disgusting thing to do, but you have your choice. I think less of you for doing it, like most people.
That said, I think there are so many weak people in the world that just will never get it. You’re killing a life. You’re killing an innocent person that never will get to see the light of day. If you think adoption is worse than actually breathing in air, gfy. Life is hard for some, but doesn’t mean their lives need to end because it’s difficult or because it’s inconvenient to others.
Poor thing, you’re pregnant in the middle of a semester, you can’t finish your midterms. Seriously? There’s this thing called responsibility, and no matter how hard the decision is, you need to take it. It’s what strong people do. Suck it up and have the baby, give it to someone who will actually take care of it. It doesn’t have to be Angelina Jolie, get over it.
“My uterus, my rights” is vulgar… how do you compare a lifeless reproductive organ to snuffing out a potential life? That phrase is so thoughtless, and shows the thought process of people who discuss this issue.
There are SO many ways to stop pregnancy before it starts, saying that you need options to abort after the first trimester “because some women don’t even know they’re pregnant until after the first trimester” is idiotic. How do you not know you’re own body? Are you mentally deficient? There are SO many resources out there to stop it before it even starts.
Then I hear “what about that struggling teenager that lives on the streets with no education XYZ” Really? Suddenly there’s a imaginary person who encompasses all the terrible statistics. Great, find me this person.
“What about the person who was raped etc?” Have you met a child of a rape? Thanks for making them feel less than human. The mother has options immediately after her rape, as long as she goes to the authorities and uses Plan B.
Adoption. Get used to the idea. There are so many people who will take care of your baby. If you say “NO” because the child might live a “POTENTIALLY” bad life, seriously? How cold and callous are you? So if I end up in a wheelchair at some point in my life, I should just end it? There’s no point in living if life isn’t perfect. It’s such a loser and quitter mentality to “just give up” because “things might get bad”.
LIFE is always better than DEATH no matter how hard life is. People who are for second and third trimester abortions are killers.
Guess what? I have a uterus, so I guess I get my opinion.
I am copying your response and saving it because you placed so many of my exact thoughts into such well written words. Thank you!
Tabby, “I’m a woman and I totally disagree with abortion unless the woman has been raped.”
Yes, because obviously a rape fetus is less innocent and an ‘accidental’ fetus must be carried to term as a punishment for the irresponsible. Wow. You’re screwing up your own argument with your hypocrisy.
I’ve never had an abortion or been pregnant myself, but I am pro-choice up until a certain point in the pregnancy. Every female has the right to choose if and when she will have a child, as the sole owner of her own body, regardless of what any religion or religious authority figure has to say about it. We have the separation of church and state for a reason, people.
If you are opposed to all abortion, then don’t get one. Ever. Just don’t try to make the decision for everybody else. Those of you who ‘feel’ that early term abortion is murder, is ‘disgusting’, is ‘irresponsible’, is ‘selfish’, and ‘think less of a person for it’ are showing your self-righteous ignorance and proving that you know next to nothing about the development of a fertilized embryo or fetus. An embryo does not become a human life the moment it is fertilized.
After read his letter, what I realize is I don’t see gay man against gay’s right. I don’t see black man against black’s right. But with this abortion right I see woman against woman’s right. Why is that?