Considering the interest in all things Benedict Cumberbatch this week, I thought I would attempt a high-class “analysis” of our Otter King and his whirlwind engagement. I tend to believe The Daily Mail’s source, who claimed that Benedict and Sophie Hunter have only been together for about five months. That’s about my calculation too – this thing started in late spring/early summer at the earliest. Is that enough time to “know” that this is the woman you were meant to marry? Eh. I tend to think couples should give it a year and I tend to think couples should really live together and comingle finances as a “test” for marriage, but I’m surprisingly conservative about that kind of thing. So, while I’m happy for Benedict and Sophie, I also think this is too soon. But they’re old enough to know what they’re doing, so who am I to judge?

There were some theories that Benedict and Sophie announced their engagement this week because it’s strategically ahead of Benedict’s presumptive Oscar campaign for The Imitation Game. TIG comes out (in America) on November 28. It’s too late for this engagement to be front and center of Benedict’s magazine cover profiles (he’s already covered Out, Elle UK and Time Out London), plus he’s already done the film festival circuit (TIFF, BFI London) without Sophie. But… he still has the big premieres. I’m assuming TIG will have a big, Harvey Weinstein-approved premiere launch in London and probably New York as well. Will Sophie be on Bendy’s arm for the premieres? What about the screenings? Will she help him glad-hand the Oscar voters?

I also have a small theory that I’ve been working on for a few months now – I think Benedict is really feeling the competition from Eddie Redmayne. They are friends in real life, but five months ago, most people believed that Benedict would be the posh English boy with an Oscar nomination this year. Then Eddie came out with The Theory of Everything and now most Oscar prognosticators think Eddie has an even better shot at a nomination than Benedict. There’s always the possibility that the Academy will nominate TWO posh English boys for Best Actor, but Oscar voters might feel like they have to choose between Eddie and Bendy just for the nominations. And if they do have to choose, what would be the deciding factors? Eddie Redmayne is adorably engaged already, and he’s been discussing his future wife and their wedding plans in interviews. Eddie comes across as sweet, humble and already “settled down.” Which plays well with the Oscar voters. Maybe Benedict wanted to even the playing field. And sh-t, we’ve barely said two words about Redmayne this week, right?

Time Magazine ran an “analysis” piece on why some Cumberbitches are depressed about Benedict’s engagement. They brought up the whole fairy-tale prince aspect of it, like Benedict is Prince Otter and plucked a “normal girl” out of the crowd to make her his wife. The same thing Prince William did when he married Kate Middleton. The same thing that George Clooney did when he married a “normal girl” Amal Alamuddin, except Clooney Propaganda worked overtime to ensure that we never thought of Amal as “normal” – instead, it’s like Amal has been painted as that perfect unicorn, the brilliant, sexy, classy, stylish, funny, loving, amazing, ambitious and fabulous woman who can do it all AND have great hair. Something tells me that Sophie Hunter won’t be following The Amal Clooney Method. Or The Waity Method. But that won’t stop the Cumberbitches from ripping out their hair and thinking about how they could have been the “normal girl” with Mr. Violin Fingers.

To continue with the fairy-tale, “Bendy plucked a girl from obscurity” aspect of this engagement, the UK papers got in touch with Sophie’s mother and brother. This exact same thing happened with William and Kate announced their engagement – Carole and Michael Middleton were trotted out to give a statement. Sophie’s mom told media outlets: “We are very happy for them. It’s a really fabulous day. It’s only just been announced so we don’t know any more but it’s lovely news.” Sophie’s brother Patrick said: “We’re all very happy for Soph – it’s really exciting.” Patrick is totally going to be a Pippa Middleton about this, I can already tell. PUT AWAY YOUR ASS OF LIES, PATRICK.

PS… CB told me that the engagement story was our most-commented-on post EVER! Thanks for that! And thank you to all of the people who tweeted me and asked how I was doing! That was sweet and hilarious.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet and WENN.