I’m so confused by Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner, and I get the impression that they’re confused too. These two haven’t filed for divorce yet, they’ve done multiple photo ops, and they’ve given blow-by-blow commentary to the press on the state of their relationship. The last two stories about them, both in People Magazine yesterday, sort of contradict each other. One concludes with a previous quote that “there is no reconciliation” and that they’re trying to do what’s best for their kids. Then, eight hours later, People published a follow-up that definitely sounds like the door is open to a reconciliation. Here’s some of that story, and read between the lines and tell me whether you think this sounds like they’re back together tentatively:
Affleck has been more at ease of late. He’s been spotted with his kids on numerous weekend outings, and now that Jennifer Garner is home, they are spending time together as a family.
“His family is all he cares about. This is what makes him happy and it makes sense that he looks happier,” a source tells PEOPLE.”He enjoys the time with his family and that includes Jen. They are still working hard at this…
“It’s still really hard and every day Ben’s learning new positive ways to cope and that goes on both sides,” says the source. “He’s just focused on his family.”
Affleck and Garner are working out their new normal, and simply trying to figure out their next steps.
“They had to take a step away from each other at first and now they are coming back together and you have to find your footing first and then move forward,” says the source.
I’ve seen friends (“friends”) go through separation and divorce and it’s a roller coaster. You have lots of history, kids you need to co-parent, and feelings and it can be a mess. That’s why you don’t give quotes to freaking People Magazine every other day. That’s why you keep it quiet and don’t bring friends and family too deep into your drama, not to mention the press. I don’t know why I am taking this at face value, though, these two are like a reality show at this point. There’s a whole PR team, maybe two competing ones, behind the scenes calling the shots. There’s tens of millions at stake in these people’s images. This is likely the latest tactic in a PR and damage control campaign, although it may have some genuine basis in reality.
See – Affleck isn’t a nanny-screwing douche! He’s a family man who messed up and loves his wife and kids. They want to work it out. Nothing to see here except Ben being a good guy and making it right.
Photos are from 9-13-15. Credit: FameFlynet
It sounds like they need to overhaul their PR team, they are or aren’t. I wish them luck though
It would not surprise me if she takes him back. Given what she’s clearly willing to put up with, and that she knew what she was getting when she married him…yeah, I could see it happen.
ROTFL …I’m just laughing.
Call me a crazy conspiracy theorist, but I still have to wonder if this has all just been a PR game to humiliate the sh!t out of Ben for taking it one step too far by Bangin’ the Nanny. Jen gets to be the angel and Ben is the asshole, but she never really leaves.
I don’t think that they’d go that far. If possible they would have kept it under wraps. But I’m sure that she knew before that he cheated…there were rumours for years and even a commenter on this site wrote somehting about it.
True, Liv, but maybe she knew the nanny-banging would come out one way or the other so she decided to spin it in her favor? Idk, really. I just think it’s fun to theorize.
I’m in the conspiracy theory group as well, but mine’s a little different. I think they’ve always, always had an agreement or open marriage– like Goldie and Kurt have had for years. But they found out the nanny was going to go public so the nan forced their hand to go public with this divorce charade to maintain both of their images. Either that or Ben breached the ground rules of their open marriage by choosing an employee or someone too close.
What I dont understand is why is everybody certain that ben and jen’s “pr teams” are constantly giving the press updates? You magazines make up stuff all the time. I Don’t get how people think they “know” whats going on with these two.
I don’t think so. Her facial expressions when she is around him are pretty tense. I think she forces herself to be with him for the kids and it’s hard. She’s a mamma bear and this time he messed with someone close to the kids and she would never be able to trust him. I think she finally reached that place where she knows that life will actually be better for the kids without the marriage, rather than staying in a bad marriage for the sake of keeping the family together. I can see that she thought the sacrifice was worth it, but now knows it really isn’t.
I agree. I think she would do just about anything to protect her kids, but like you said she had an epithany (?) and realized that staying for them was probably not in their best interest anymore. :(. I loved these two together and thought they were adorable together, him on his own, not so much. But you can see that she is tense around him and that she is only doing “the family thing” for the kids. I think it is going to be really hard for her when he does start dating someone publicly. I have seen posts on twitter suggesting he is still seeing the Nanny on the VERY down low and they use disguises to meet.
What a horrific thought. He really is messed up if he stays in that affair. Total self destruction. I’ve never used Twitter. How do you see posts like that?
Personally, I think they’re both just trying to enjoy spending time as a family together, now without the pressure or expectations of the marriage.
It also seems like Ben knows he’s going to miss these regular activities with his kids, so Jen’s allowing him to join them on these outings before he becomes too busy with work again.
For all involved, though, I do wish they would stop with the daily PR updates and just BE.
His family is all he cares about? No. No it’s not. This is really turning into a PR dogf00k.
+1 Seriously, is anyone buying this BS?
I know, right? And it’s what makes him happy. When? Now? because a few weeks ago I’m pretty sure porking the hired help is what made him happy.
FYI – Blinds say all these family outings he’s on is just for PR and photo ops because he plans to go for shared custody. I’m laughing at that. Ben’s mommy must be up for alot of babysitting because Ben will not be there. Blinds aren’t accurate alot of the time and I hope this is one of the wrong ones, because thinking of Ben trying to get shared custody makes me really mad. Maybe he’s just looking for an opportunity to need babysitter so……yeah, I’ll just stop right there.
He would never go for shared custody physically. He will be back off on location in another month and really busy next year with his schedule. That’s one thing Ben would never do is fight her on that. And she would never use the kids against him. They will work child custody out between and it will be ever fluid because of his schedule away and coming home for weekends and sometimes back for months at a time. He has always said she’s the primary caretaker since his career takes him away.
Whatever their problems, I believe there is a lot of respect he has for her as the mother and he would never try to take them away half the time right now and couldn’t anyway. And she will keep on facilitating a relationship with them and Ben and working with his schedule for him to be with them and still working out her schedule to do projects. I think the counseling is a very good thing for them to really keep it constructive in co-parenting as they go forward as it won’t be easy at times.
What is wrong with these 2 people! Their marriage has run it’s course. Get a divorce and move on with your lives.
They think they’re special. There’s no other explanation. Narcissistic concern for image.
Yes!
They’re not getting back together. It’s just Jen’s camp (“There is no reconciliation”) one day versus Ben’s camp (“His family is all he cares about”) another.
I think they both just need to STFU. Boy, do they try to control their images!
I think you are right. I also think Affleck has zero desire to actually reconcile I think he’s just trying to repair his image for the lead-up to Batman.
I think he is actually doing himself more harm in the process, though. It kinda makes him look ever more shallow.
And court. I would hope any judge would do his/her homework and look into how many family outings he was one BEFORE he scrumped the nanny.
You nailed it 100% Luca76!!!!
I agree with Luca76 regarding this whole mess. Affleck has a seriously anticipated movie/possible successful re-franchise – the kind of movie that sends actors all over the world for promotion. I think Affleck would rather eat ground glass than have every article regarding BvS mention Nannygate as well as the PBS debacle.
I also think the studio/management may have been the first ones to step in with some strongly ‘suggested’ behavior in order rescue any derailment of the Batman publicity train. And it’s not like Ben’s previous role as a superhero was particularly well-received. Another one of my conspiracy theories (I promise I’ll stop after this): Affleck has always been supremely jealous of the positive notices (and sequel/spin-off movie) Garner received for Daredevil. I remember at the time some reviewers calling her the only good thing about the movie.
That sounds about right.
Maybe Garner isn’t on speaking terms with Affleck, and they can only communicate with each other through the press. I’m sort of kidding, and sort of not?
Passive aggressive narcissism? Fits
Hmm. I’m all for working out the rough spots, but it just seems to me that he has crossed a line I couldn’t live with. To each his own, I guess. But I’d call it a day, I think.
Well said. There’s a difference between accepting someone’s human foibles that leave you intact, and accepting someone’s human foibles that damage your self-respect (let alone set a bad example for your kids). If he’s gearing up for another “hard work” moment … ugh! The hard work didn’t pay off, Ben.
Is this the first clean shirt we’ve seen on Ben in months?
LOL, all I can see is DEM PLUGS
Oh me too! It’s distracting, and worse than a receding hairline.
Jen has no sense of fashion style. None whatsoever.
Listen, When I go out to lunch with my very fashionable, highly made-up older sister, I often look like a homeless person in comparison, so I sure shouldn’t be judging….but even I can see she doesn’t have any fashion sense. I totally agree.
I’ve tried and I’ve tried not to judge but … yeah, she either knows what looks good on her and picks the exact opposite, or she simply does not know. Good for her if she doesn’t care, actually. I wish I didn’t. ; )
I realize I’m pretty shallow but what in seven hells possesses this woman to look like she shops in the boy’s section at Kohl’s?
I have always thought Garner was stunning and needs very little. Seriously, but some dark-wash higher-end jeans, designer flats and a proper tucked-in white tee designed for grown women. Done. And please, no more horizontal stripes unless you want to rock a French boatneck sailor shirt.
There was a kind-of ugly bar necklace she was wearing CONSTANTLY for a few months that came off immediately after the split announcement. I’ve been minorly obsessed wondering if this was a gift from Ben and she broke up with him b/c she couldn’t stand his bad taste in jewelry? Did Ben re-gift it to the nanny?
I seriously need a job. I must stop thinking about these people.
Those bloody shoes/sandals. Whaaat!!!! Which grandma shop did she go to buy those and how does she figure they go with that skirt?
In the photo with Jen on the first day of school with the other blonde mother, I noticed the shoes of the other woman and they were the very same style Jen is wearing. Another commenter somewhere said that is the style in that neighborhood. So, for her area, she may actually be styled per the fashion. Not saying it looks great, just that she fits in.
She clearly dresses like a normal mom, not a Hollywood mom…and I love that about her. If I saw her at my kid’s school I would think she looked cute and comfortable.
Imagine if they get back together: daily pictures from the farmers’ market. Probably worse and more boring than the next Batman.
Do I think that they are getting back together….absolutely not.
However…I believe they are trying to cope with the new situation by focusing on the kids….and they are probably doing a better job then most.
The PR team needs to take a step back and stop trying to control the narrative as it looks desperate at this stage.
Well considering that the clients tell the PR team what to put out about them at the end of the day…it’s Ben and Jen who look desperate.
Come November, while on the set of his latest film, his family would be the last thing in his mind! Back to the old cycle.
It will be very disappointing if JG will take him back but it is between the two of them.
This story is basically the story of my life right now. It wasn’t the Nanny however, just your run of the mill co-worker. We still go out with the kids here and there and are not divorced yet, although we filed. I feel for her, him not so much. But, this happens and we are not famous.
I live in an upscale neighbourhood. (I live in a modest condo). The most common affairs are at work with co-workers-easy access.
Another common scenario is a woman’s so-called BFF screwing her husband. I have had my daughters friends fathers hit on me constantly. Even have asked me if I have had plastic surgery or a boob job because i am so “Hot”. (No!)
Ben’s behavior does not seem uncommon to me. The more money and power a man has-the more entitled they feel. It’s bizarre. Meanwhile their wives are having plastic surgery, hiring personal trainers, injecting fillers and botox into their faces. Their husbands still cheat. I honestly wonder why folks get married.
Loyalty and monogamy seem to be facing extinction-especially in boring suburbia.
This is true.
But women cheat also in suburbia.
From his past behavior, it seems that Ben is quite conflicted. He WANTS the family, home fires, etc, but he also WANTS the freedom of a single man to work, drink, gamble, women at full throttle.
His solution over the past few years has appeared to be having the family resting in the background to pick up and put down when he feels like it and be single what appears to be the majority of the time. It’s been slowly crumbling around him for years, because it isn’t enough for his wife and she made that clear by her “nagging, etc.”
I think he got carried away and careless with that scenario and the two finally overlapped with big, ugly results. Also, I have no doubt that he knew that was a big way to get in a “dig” at his wife for her “nagging” about his lifestyle.
I don’t think she’ll take him back. I do believe he went beyond her ability to excuse his behavior by “knowing” it comes from his demons.
Cats in the cradle…repeat what you know.
PS – sorry for the prolific use of “quotes.” Just my way of emphasizing.
I don’t think they will reconcile. Jen reportedly hired Laura Wasser.
I marvel at how Samuel looks totally like Matt Damon’s son.
Look at that squint! Look at that lip curl! That entire area from the eyes to the nose is very Matt Damon. If you told me that was a picture of Matt Damon as a child, I could believe it.
If you google Ben Affleck Child Actor, there are a couple of photos of BA as a toddler, with white blonde hair and chin dimple. Compare that to Samuel and you see the resemblance. The rest of him – mouth, dimples are all his mom.
Everyday I read these comments that Samuel favors Matt Damon and everyday I feel a little bad for hoping it could be true. Only to get back at Ben though. I would never want pain for Matt’s sweet wife and kids. But if Matt were single and all other conditions the same, oh heck yeah, I wish this were the truth.
But when he was young, the eyes were so Matt, wide-spaced, the shape of them, and blue. It was uncanny. I never thought anything untoward. It was just funny. He does have Ben’s dimple in his chin and Ben had very blonde hair as a young kid. And Sam looks like Jen also.
Ben may be unfaithful to women, but Ben and Matt are true blue all the way. Nothing breaks them apart. And Matt would never do something like that, cheat on Lucy with his best friend’s wife.
So This would never happen. Jen doesn’t even seem like Matt’s type anyway. And Sam was planned it seems. I think Ben wanted a boy. And they had settled back into the marriage, so had the third.
Maybe she understands his issues and is able to put everything aside from the marriage and make a united front for their kids. No way will they get back together. She struggled with him for a long time and public humiliation that comes with a cheating husband to change her mind now. I know from my own experience, once you accept it’s all water under the bridge, that you can be good friends and coparents to your children. It takes both of you to work toward that though, as they both seem to be doing. It’s the best thing for the kids.
The second follow up People story still says they plan to move forward with their divorce too, so someone is still telling that to People.
I totally think they are doing it again from the pics. UGH. She is definitely one of those women (we have all met them) who give the men 200 chances.
Being one of those women (10 years worth of repeated chances and my friends family thought I was crazy), I can tell you that there does actually come a time when you know it’s time to stop. There’s a line that you don’t even know is there until it’s crossed. For me that line involved an incident where my kids’ safety and wellbeing was threatened. I held strong like I never knew I could after that. Who knows if she found her line.
I hope they are not confusing the children with these PR shenanigans.
I hope every one find happiness and peace of mind.
Can’t help to think that. Benny is playing along because it’s almost Oscar promoting time.
He’s a douche no matter what way you look at it.
Everything has been said. I just need to add, those Payless shoes are killing me.
WTF is up with her shoes?!?!?!? Does she have a subscription to the “Ugly Shoe of the Month” club?
As @Elisha said above, the second People story also said they’re still moving forward with the divorce. That said, I do get the feeling that they’re starting to try to soft-sell the idea that they might reconcile. The wording in the rest of the story seems vague – open to interpretation. The whole thing is kind of icky – true codependent case study. Because while I believe she probably could/will never fully trust him again, I think she also doesn’t really want to let him go. And right now, she’s in the position of power, a position she hasn’t been in for most of their marriage. And I don’t necessarily believe he wants back in because of Jen specifically – if he does, I would tend to believe that it’s the “idea” of the stable home life and family that he wants. I can’t see these two being able to get through the massive issues and mistrust in the years to come – Jen would need to follow him to every movie set, and I think that would annoy him eventually. I’m waiting to see if she does just that when he starts shooting Live by Night in Nov.
JoJo, I can’t help it…I really want them to work thru and love! I cannot even imagine what it is like for Jen to be in this place with the world putting in their 2 cents and her and the kids’ future on the line. Why can’t we all just get along?????
Haha, I know you do, Diane! 🙂 But I thought you said in another recent post that you couldn’t tolerate Ben at all – how could you want her with him? I really don’t wish either of them ill – I like them both separately. I just have always thought they didn’t make sense together, as you know – way before this all happened.
I’m sure my past is responsible for the ridiculously intense reactions in me. I read some stories and they are kind, and then I read other things that make me so angry at the disregard BA directed at JG in the situation with the Nanny – the little details that leak out. I empathize strongly to the feelings that kind of betrayal evokes. That’s the can’t stand part – who can do that – inflict that kind of hurt on a spouse? Whatever was going on in their lack of compatibility, I get angry for her at such a personal breach of trust. I swing back to the other side, too, because I do understand the destructiveness of an addict. They act out horribly in the midst of addiction, but when they come down from that, can become the person you knew and loved and you see the potential in them again.
I hate divorce, though I know sometimes its the better option, I still hate it.
I think they’re behaving this way until his Batman movie comes out. Ben is happier w/ his family is a crock of s***. He’s never looked happy w/ them and now he’s just putting on airs, waiting…..
@Diane – I understand. The nanny thing was a huge betrayal. I will say though, before that, none of Ben’s cheating allegations have ever been proven – all just rumors. Also, I’m not really sure I’m on the addiction train. Do I think Ben drinks? Yes, most definitely. Does he gamble? Yes, and he’s apparently very good. Do I think he’s a full-blown addict? Not sure about that one. I know he was in rehab a long time ago, and that was apparently his own proactive effort to stop drinking patterns at that time. ( I know about his father.) I get the impression he likes to be one of the boys – likes hanging out, playing cards, probably drinking too much at times, etc. And I know that’s not conducive to a good family life either, but I for one don’t believe that the majority of their problems stemmed from his “addictions.” (I don’t believe Lainey’s blinds about the hard drugs, and I’ve noticed her stories and blinds about him have completely lost steam, and I wonder why since she seemed to have such strong convictions about him when he ran off to Canada in April without his ring.) To me, it just seems like they became very bored with each other as a couple – or at least he with her – in the last 5-6 years. And I’m guessing he turned to these vices to cope and escape. I’m not saying that’s good either – just that I’m not sure I really view him as an addict.
I agree with a lot of your comments.
I do think he has a drinking and gambling addiction, and those are very destructive to a family.
So I guess Ben decided Jen is no longer a nag and he is deciding he doesn’t want to be alone anymore. All the sudden we are suppose to magically believe how much he loves his family including “Jen”. Yea I call B.S. he looks happy when he is with his kids on his own. Jennifer is a doormat for Ben he can cheat as much as he wants and she will always take him back. They are both idiots those kids deserve better.
I really don’t like this woman. She is something that no woman should ever want to be or should admire – a liar, she lies to herself. And I am referring to her specifically because Affleck is a cheater and an idiot but he is out in the open.
They both say they are protecting the children but they will grow up soon enough and they will realize that their family is based on lies. I will never believe that a human being (man or woman) will ever accept or move past such a betrayal – her husband, the father of her kids, banged the nanny and probably many more. She gave him a family and he pissed on that and still, allegedly, she’s willing to forgive.
So back to the kids – what is the point of having a family based on lies and manipulation, of having a mom that was a doormat to your dad, of having a dad whose sexual urges need to constantly be kept in check.
Right now, they can only offer their kids honesty and they’re not doing that.
I understand being controlling with her image, so is Damon, so is Gwyneth Paltrow, so is Taylor Swift, but neither of them dealt with such a shitty, gut-wrecking situation. Paltrow had an open marriage, Damon does not have a spouse like Affleck, Garner ate and is eating shit from her SO and she’s not doing it for the kids.