Anne Hathaway is currently promoting her role in Alice Through the Looking Glass, which is why she appeared on The Ellen Show on Tuesday. This was actually her first TV interview since giving birth two months ago, and honestly, I already see a difference in Anne. She’s really sleep-deprived, for one. And as I said yesterday, I think the sleep deprivation is making her kind of punch-drunk. Anyway, she told a story about going back to the gym after she gave birth to her son, Jonathan Rosebanks (who she calls Jonny). Is two months too early to go back to the gym? It’s different for every woman, and I’m sure Anne’s doctors gave her the nod. But still, she really did just give birth, so she had a particularly emotional reaction when some dude made a comment about her “baby weight.”
Anne Hathaway gave birth only eight weeks ago, so she’s not totally ready to resume some of her normal routines. She did decide, however, that she would go back to the gym, but even that has been tough.
“Being a Mom has changed me in a couple ways. I actually, not based on this moment, but other moments feel a lot more confident. Normally you walk into the gym and you see, I work out in West Hollywood, so you see like Thor’s trainer, you know the people who have too many muscles to be in The Avengers that’s who works out at my gym,” she explains, adding that she has returned to the gym only three times. “So I would normally walk in and feel so intimidated, but I walk in I’m like yeah I work out with 5 pound weights, but I pushed a baby out of my body I feel good right now. So I don’t care what I look like, I feel great. I’m on this [row] machine, whatever that does.”
All of a sudden, someone started to stare at the Oscar-winning star, so at first she thought she was doing something incorrectly and became a little insecure. “I see this guy who does actually look like Thor’s trainer staring at me and I’m like, ‘Oh God. Am I doing something wrong?'” Hathaway recalls. “In the past I just would have slunk off my machine.”
With her new mommy confidence, Hathaway explains that she asked the trainer if everything was OK, and they struck up a short conversation. But it didn’t end there.
“He’s like, ‘So you been working out at this gym for a long time.’ And I’m like oh my God he’s hitting on me. Nice! New mom. I feel really good about myself and I’m like, ‘Oh, yeah I’ve been coming here for a little bit.’ He’s like, ‘Cool, I’m a trainer here and just wondering if you want some pointers.’ And I’m like, Oh no he’s not hitting on you he just wants a job.”
Spoiler alert: He didn’t get the job because instead of giving her the proper response after she revealed she had recently given birth, he body shamed her. “If somebody says I had a baby 13 years ago you say you look great. That is what you do that is the etiquette,” she explains on the show. “So I say to this guy I had a baby seven weeks ago. And he goes, ‘Oh, trying to lose the baby weight!'” Hathaway explains that she kept her cool in the moment, but afterwards she walked away and cried!
To be fair to the dude-face trainer, he didn’t assume that she had just had a baby, he waited until she said it. And he didn’t say, “Oh, that’s why you look that way.” But yeah, it was rude. Really rude. There’s such an epidemic of rude gym trainers, right? I’ve been going to the same gym for years and I have my routine and I know what I’m doing (for the most part) and I stay in my particular comfort zone. But inevitably, a new trainer will show up and try to tell me what I should be doing in a really patronizing way. Like, “Oh, do you understand how the treadmill works?” Yes, trust me, I understand. Now go away. As for Anne’s situation, the guy just wanted work and he probably thought he was being helpful. And she should have told him to just go away. Or she could have gone to the manager in tears and gotten the guy fired. Which is a revenge fantasy that has gotten me through many workouts.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
So shes so insecure that she needs someone feeding her lies telling her how great she looks? For crying out loud if you said i recently gained 50 lbs and the guy says trying to lose the weight you would be like yeh thats y i called you.
but … she didn’t call him?
So now we yell at people for being insecure? I’m sure that will help.
Yeah, I don’t see what was so bad about what he said.
^^Totally agree! That and the fact that she looks amazing and a lot more svelte compared to many of us mere mortals…I don’t see any baby weight. I really wouldn’t complain if I were her, because she just comes across as a whiny girl asking for a pity party.
It’s such a common thing for trainers to hear, I’m sure. He clearly meant no harm. I’d love to be offended because I’ve struggled with my weight before, but..I just don’t see why it offended her. He presented himself as a trainer, asked if she wanted any pointers and she responded with the fact that she had just given birth seven weeks prior. It’s a perfectly innocent and logical conclusion that he made. Methinks her pride was just hurt because he wasn’t hitting on her.
I’m fairly certain it’s normal to be insecure and self conscious about your body after giving birth. I’m not a huge fan of hers, but she gets a pass on this one. And she looks great now, so all her hard work is paying off!
Exactly. She’s sleep-deprived and hormones are bouncing all over. When I had my daughter, I had a rounder tummy for a long time. The two worst experiences I will never forget- at the grocery store being asked when I was due (um, 3 months ago thanks) and at a moms group party when I was asked the same thing. I drove home crying both times. The same thing happened to my friend, she gave birth then a month later came to my wedding..at least 3 people asked when she was due.
She said this happened at week7 and she is currently on week8 post-partum. So she probably didn’t gain much weight. He didn’t know she was losing post-baby weight when he approached her for work.
In that type of gym where real body builders work out at, sounds like he assumed her goal was to be one too. After she told him that she’s just delivered 7 weeks ago he appropriately said oh you are working on losing baby weight as opposed to building muscle. Then he left her alone.
Normal interaction. You can replace baby weight with “just working on losing 10Ibs?” and it would be the same interaction.
Sorry but I think this is just a dog whistle to the mini-van majority and being “just like you”.
A stranger came up to her and basically said she needed to lose ‘baby weight’ after giving birth 7 weeks ago! That is incredibly rude and sexist and inappropriate!
No, Anne Hathaway initiated a conversation with a stranger in a gym and voluntarily told him him she had recently given birth. They were in a gym, and he was offering exercise pointers, so he was making an educated guess about her objective based on the information she had given him.
I dont’ think the trainer said or did anything wrong. She said first she just had a baby. Isn’t it common sense to do the math and conclude she’s at the gym to get back in shape after having a baby? I guess I’m not all that sensitive. And my gut tells me she is overly senstive probably because her hormones are still raging since she only just gave birth 2 months ago. I think she needs to grow a thicker skin. He didn’t say she was fat. He didn’t say she looked bad. He responded to her sentence about just having a baby. And saying “Oh, so you’re trying to lose the baby weight” isn’t at all the same as saying, “Oh my God! You are fat!” That’s her interpretation because she’s sensitive about it.
And, yes, I think it’s ridiculous to lie and tell anybody they look great when they do not especially if they aren’t hinting or fishing for a compliment. Why does anything at all need to be said about somebody’s body if they’re not talking about it. Saying you just had a baby calls for questions about the baby and acknowleding the addition to the family. It doesn’t require an auto-comeback lie about the state of the new mom’s figure.
8 weeks is not that long and her hormones are raging so I will be the last one to tell a new mom she needs to grow a thicker skin. I had to watch what I said and did around my sister for at least 6 months lol.
It’s not ridculous to tell a new mom she looks great. There are 1000 things he could’ve said in response to her statement about having given birth weeks ago. He immediately assumed she needed to lose weight, that was his first thought. He could’ve said “Oh wow, and you’re back here already? Respect!” But no, it’s assumed she needs to slim down 8 weeks after. Are we really at a point where we think a mom of two months needs to grow a thicker skin? And YES, in this situation, when HE brings up her baby weight, it is exactly like saying she’s fat. He wasn’t over the top rude but he was damn insensitive and everyone knows that you do NOT bring up the baby weight to a complete stranger! I would’ve cried too.
Thank you Littlemissnaughty, you said it perfectly! Word.
I think Anne just cries at the drop of a hat. She seems to always be talking about crying or she is crying. The trainer’s comment was a little insensitive but I don’t think he was trying to body shame her.
Listen to her tell the story and she is clearly Just being funny and entertaining. I have a few of those “go to” stories. I seriously doubt she cried in the gym; it just makes for a good punchline. I thought she was funny, but then I like her.
When I go to the gym there is this guy-trainer-owner that is there to help us but mostly keeps it to himself (small gym with mostly guys who know what they are doing). Sometimes I eat more than I should and my belly shows it (honestly nothing terrible) and he comes and says to me stop doing that exercise and do this. When I complain he says that If I eat like a pig I work out like a donkey. Sometimes he calls me “fat ass” in a joking manner but I am very confident in myself so I don’t care. Plus now i made peace with my body. I feel pretty good and I am not fat at all. Instead I tell him sometimes that if I get out of the gym hurting I am never coming back. The key is not to take yourself to seriously. Congrats to her for that body after 2 months she looks ravishing
Aishwarya rai was mocked in media for her baby weight, she didn’t give a fig. I liked her sooo much for her that.
But everyone is different. The hormonal changes during pregnancy and after birth. alone, are enough to make people very emotional. It could be that normally she wouldn’t care, but she’s a brand new mom. Her hormones are running amok, and she’s probably not getting enough sleep. I give her a pass on crying over something she probably wouldn’t usually.
Yea this. Sleep deprivation and hormones can make you very sensitive. I don’t think the trainer said anything that would normally be worth crying over, but I definitely cried over a lot of crap that wasn’t worth crying over. And my relationship to my body was kind of touchy immediately postpartum. On the one hand I was amazed by what my body did. On the other hand, looking in the mirror and not recognizing your own body is tough. It can definitely be a sensitive point.
I wouldn’t have taken it that way at all. I totally understand where the trainer was coming from. I mean, new mom at the gym… Why would she be there is it wasn’t to get back to her pre baby weight? I like Anne but she was just being oversensitive there.
I agree. He wasn’t making a leap. She said she just had a baby, and many new moms talk about their desire to get back to their pre-baby size. He probably hears it all the time.
Yeah that seems like a normal conclusion to draw. She said she just had a baby and now she’s working out. It’s not like he just walked up to her out of the blue and asked her about her baby weight.
I’d be inclined to agree on this occasion, she told him she’d just had a baby and was in the gym so…he made a comment (actually it sounds like a question) asking was she trying to lose the baby weight which ok given he doesn’t know her personally might have been a bit much but she was in a gym and he is a trainer trying to get business so the presumption was there, he did the usual do you need tips that they all do, and only mentioned baby weight after she did. If he had just said it outright with no context from her then yes, but how is this example body shaming?
I get though that a new mum is sleep deprived/hormonal but I genuinely don’t think the guy was trying to put her down or shame her in this case.
Hormones was my first thought as well.
I don’t think she’s normally THIS sensitive.
This is also on her personal time, not in a professional situation. She may be criticized for a living, but this wasn’t work. Would you particularly want someone to make a comment about your body (and this is definitely one, though implied) when you’re just minding your own business at the gym? I certainly wouldn’t, and I can see why she’d be taken aback.
Hormones are tricky and every woman’s experience is different after giving birth. Some women are perfectly fine, some women are more emotional and sensitive than others, and some go into postnatal depression.
You’d think that working in Hollywood would give celebs a thicker skin.
maybe hormones are to blame?
I don’t take it as Anne being overly sensitive or hormonal (although she probably is both right now – she just gave birth folks! She’s entitled.)
I take it that Anne is trying to be funny by adding a bit of self deprecation.
She’s done this before – it’s her shtick.
I like her.
She seems genuine and I think she looks gorgeous.
I’ve never seen a new mom who may want to lose more to get to pre-baby weight slim down quickly like Anne and have a waistline!
The waistline is the last thing to be regained for most, I think.
I’m jealous 😉
Maybe she was there to gain strength. Increase cardiovascular health. He went straight to dropping the baby fluff, which is pointing out her flaws he found obvious. Maybe she was being sensitive, because it seems like obvious takeaway, but that sleep deprived brain will cry unpredictably. And when you look like a deflated wrinkly balloon under your workout clothes, those confident moments are few and far between, and he shattered it. I won’t get mad at her for that.
Maybe as well she didn’t think it was that noticeable and someone just flat out said it was… I don’t care who you are, that hurts!
And she’s an actress so of course he knew the score – gotta get back into the gymn pronto to drop some baby weight. It was a foregone conclusion and expected. Nothing rude.
I don’t think he was rude at all. He’s a trainer and she’s at a gym seven weeks after having a baby. I reckon what he said was fine. He was right: she was there to lose the baby weight and get back in shape after the birth.
Trainers come in a couple of different modes – well educated and supportive of you and your goals, usually working for a top trainer of like mind or themselves, and young, hunky men who look good naturally and have never had to try to lose weight who know a little bit and think they know everything. The second type should be ignored and avoided. Gyms hire them in my town because the first type is in pretty short supply and don’t want to be gym trainers. So she should just see him for what he is, a dope trying to make her feel insecure by shaming her, hoping that will make her think she needs him. Bye.
That’s a really accurate description of the two types of trainers at my gym as well. The instructors are different though, and much better IMO.
This is a very good assessment.
On the nose GNAT! The latter trainer often seems to be the most forward too and is always the one to come up to you claiming they have great tips.
I am the former (honking my own horn here!) and I’d never want to work for about 90% of gyms. It’s a really high pressure sales environment.
Good for you! You deserve some horn honking. 🙂 Out of curiosity what’s your favorite workout?
Depends on the individual, because I’d say the best workout is one that you enjoy doing and you’ll actually be motivated to get out of the house to do. Myself, I run. And some supporting lifting/strength work. Though I’d like to try some biking/swimming in the off season. There’s a lot of options out there, and I also enjoy using equipment like medicine balls, battle ropes, BOSUs (not a huge Kettlebell person) in a great HIIT format, since the most important part is getting that heart rate up and working up a solid sweat!
I too think that unless you enjoy what you’re doing you won’t stick with it. I loathe going to the gym and only do so when weather or time keep me from the specific type of workout I need for a trail race I’m running. Getting outside on trails has been the only way I can motivate myself to get out the door and get my heart pounding for a good hour or two.
I found that even when I was feeling lousy, a brisk walk for an hour around my hilly neighborhood did my mood and body a lot of good.
Ah, poor thing. That’s kind of a hard time, with the hormones going crazy and sleep deprivation, so I get the tears.
Me too. She was a stick woman before; I think she looks great in the premiere pictures.
0verreaction on Anne’s part.
Yes. She brought up the recent birth & his comment was not offensive. He didn’t call out the tummy pooch, which would have been offensive.
That’s too bad. She looks great though.
I can understand telling that story to a friend but … on the Ellen show? That being said, she came across as very relatable, as talented, smart, successful and pretty as she is… she is * just like us * 🙂 with everyday, insecurities. I hope she does not google herself and find * mean* comments … but do you think Ellen is tired of the * new mom * stories because she did not look that engaged..?
why blame Hathaway for that whereas Jennifer Lawrence did it all time
Ellen always looks distracted to me. I wonder if she has ADD..
I don’t get why Ellen is so popural. She seems to he a nice woman and all, but she’s not really funny, she’s a bad interviewer ( only Fallon is worse), she was one of the worst Oscar hosts ever. What’s the appeal?
Have you seen her stand-up or her original sit com?
She was pretty funny back in the day.
But I think people like her because she’s fun and non-threatening. That’s not to say I disagree with you because her show is definitely not for me.
I was going to say what Kitten said, if you watched her original show you would see how funny she was. Pretty endearing, actually. I don’t watch her show now except for the occasional clip but she seems to have hardened a bit over the years.
I have seen her show circa the time she came out I think. She had the spark if you know what i mean. Now I think she has gotten tired of same old same. She is super rich, maybe bored. She has all she fought for sooo…she looks like my father right before retiring, no more fucks to give just working out of habit
Oprah has looked that way for a while…just not as engaged. I’m about their age (though not their wealth or status) and have seen that often someone has to work her way through this period and come out the other side. They’re talented and have a lot to offer…I hope they do.
7 weeks PP and already feeling so much pressure, not to mention not modifying her workout to something more suited for after childbirth, there’s been such an advance in women’s fitness, especially in pp exercises, you’d expect someone like her, privy to the best doctors, physical therapists etc, to be a bit more in touch and not to go mindlessly back to the gym.
You don’t know what she was doing at the gym. Or what advice she’d already gotten.
She looks great here. I feel like this is the weight she should be at, anything less is too skinny for her. Instead of trying to get back to supper skinny, she could just work on toning. Jmo
It could be or she could just be taking some time out for herself, maybe this is how she unwinds?
Ive talked about wanting to go back to running after I have my baby, not because I’m obsessed with losing weight but because it cleared my head, made me feel better, gave me more energy. Also I say this as in I will *eventually* get back to it, not that I will be doing it 2 weeks in but a few of the reactions I have had, like I’m some body obsessed neglectful mum.
Aw, I don’t think that’s neglectful at all, I think that’s setting a great example for your child. (And I completely understand what you mean about running as a way to unwind!) Where I live, the jogging stroller dominates. I always see women — and men! — in the park running with their babies. I think it’s really sweet!
I love running for all the same reasons, so I hear you. I did both after having my babies — ran on my own sometimes and took them out in the jogger stroller. It’s important as a mom to have those things that can help clear your head, it’s not neglectful at all. (If you do get a jogger stroller, make sure you buy your baby sunglasses…it took me a bit of time to realize that the sun would sometimes shine straight into my little guy’s eyes, even with the hood up on the stroller and a hat on his head.)
Congratuations on your new wee kiddo, btw!
Aww thanks guys!
I agree. I think she looks incredible at this weight! I can’t remember her looking better. The hair length and color looks gorgeous, too.
I feel like I’m missing something because I don’t think he said anything wrong. A lot of women go to the gym after having a baby. It would be one thing if Anne didn’t say anything but it’s natural to assume she wants to lose more weight.
I don’t get what he said offensive…I’m not being facetious, I seriously didn’t see anything that sounded like “shaming” because lord knows everything is now a days.
me neither. all this “shaming” stuff has gotten out of hand. Aside from that, Anne looks amazing.
I can’t believe the people on here dragging her for this. She had just given birth 7 weeks prior. Your hormones are completely nuts. She’s allowed to have a sensitive moment for Pete’s sake!
Here’s the thing…I can sympathize with her reaction. Her hormones were probably going crazy, and maybe if she hadn’t just had a baby, she wouldn’t have cried about it. That doesn’t mean the trainer was out of line. He was doing his job.
i don’t know. is it his job to chat her up while she is working out? no trainer in my gym would dare to distract me during a workout, especially with unsolicited advice. how uncalled for.
but i’m sensitive that way. i hate attention from trainers. i would yell “go away” with no shame.
It’s a service job, so sometimes when they’re intrusive it’s like a salesperson in the store staying in your face, or a waiter compulsively asking how everything is every 8 minutes during your meal (which happened to me yesterday). There’s an art to good service.
i honestly don’t get the whole thing, what did he say?
When I saw “spoiler alert” it totally lost me. Was, “your trying to lose the baby weight” the offensive thing?
If so, she’s in a gym and he’s a trainer. He probably sees women all the time who come after giving birth to lose the weight.
I’m not dragging her for crying, because I’m sensitive as well.
But if I’m in a gym and a trainer asks me If i’m here to lose weight, I wouldn’t find that offensive.
Though I get it, she just had a baby so her hormones are nuts.
Part of me wonders if she just added the part about crying to embellish on what is really a pretty uninteresting anecdote.
Or maybe hormones..
But even if she wasn’t experiencing post-pregnancy hormone swings, I still get her reaction. Ok maybe not the crying part, but I get her being a bit bummed out.
If she doesn’t think she gained much weight or any weight at all really, then someone pointing out that you’ve gained weight can be hurtful. Maybe she thought she looked great and was just there to tone up a bit and then some dude comes over and asks her if she wants to lose the baby weight.
I’m not in any way, shape, or form accusing Anne of having an ED, but just to speak from my own struggles, when I was recovering the hardest thing to hear from people was that I was looking “healthy” or that it looked like I gained a couple lbs. I know that’s ridiculous, but comments like that pushed me to the brink tears.
So was Anne being a bit oversensitive? Probably. And I don’t think the trainer is a terrible person, just that he should probably mind his own business and keep the unsolicited advice to himself.
Boil it down to this: a trainer came up and, completely un-prompted, said something along the lines of “trying to lose those extra pounds, huh?”. It may not offend some people, but I can understand for those who it does. Either way, there’s no way I’d hire that trainer.
I don’t think a trainer should ever assume out loud that you’re trying to lose weight. Maybe you’re trying to shape up what you have, get healthier, get stronger, whatever, but I think it’s more tactful to ask YOU what your goals are. Just say “what are you hoping to achieve?” Not “so, trying to lose that beer gut, I see! Good for you!” I probably wouldn’t cry over it, but maybe she felt like it took some courage to go there, and then he practically calls her fat.
There is so much that changes with your body physiologically after having a baby, that while there’s a lot of pressure on women to whittle the number on the scale down immediately, it’s not actually the most important thing to focus on. Gaining back core strength (whole core, not just abs), restoring proper alignment, working to get muscle tone back – THAT’S the big concern when you work with new moms. If you help them build back a solid base of fitness, the weight will naturally come off on its own and you’re doing a better job of serving your client. A good trainer should know that. And I will always side eye someone who doesn’t even ask what a person’s goals are. She can think for herself.
Eh, I kinda understand what she felt, I think, and I agree with her, but I can’t explain.
Our main fitness expert (in my twon) said that to lose naby weight you shoudlgive yourself time it took to get it-9months. And for someone making any kind of comment about my baby weight, I feel insecure: my baby is 4, almost 5 months old, and of 22, those last 8 kilos are still here. It’s not just the fact that I was always slim and fit and never had so much, it’s the fact that my whole body changed and I’m still trying to figure out how much of it is gonna stay forever (rounded hips, strerch marks, different b00bs…)-add sleep deprivation, trying to juggle my career and my motherhood and all the emotions that come with it-and I feel stupidly vulnerable every time someone comments on my weight-good or bad. Ahe could have gone to the gym to strecth those muscles that were inactive and cramped bc of tough pregnancy, pr tpugh delibery-and not just and always to “lose the baby weight”. First thing I did when I got a-ok from dr, I went to the pool. Not because of my looks or weight- I simply wanted to feel weigthless and good in my body for an hour.
Yes. our babies are around the same age (5 months next week). I’m barely hanging on with work and being a mom, and being a wife is coming in a distant third. I don’t feel like I have time for the gym or to even stop at Starbucks for a coffee. If I get a walk in with the stroller, it’s amazing (and it means that other things did not get done). Just the fact that Anne got to the gym is mind-blowing to me. The trainer is a dope. Can’t she just be there for her health? Why does she have to be trying to lose weight? I personally think she looks amazing.
Oh, congratulations! 🙂 I’m so sleep deprived I can’t even write straight-the comment above is living proof of that. 🙂
I was so busy + breastfeeding that by the time my son was ten months old, I was like a toothpick. It’s just kinda gross to me that this is somehow considered praiseworthy. It’s a sign of overwork and stress. And the world’s flakiest babysitter who was NEVER EVER on time and would always make me starve waiting for her.
Ladies, you are doing great just as you are. I totally understand what you’re saying and have been there (there were many tears shed as I’d try to cram myself into clothes that didn’t fit), but I hope you know that you are doing a great job.
Bridget, it may sound corny, but you just made my day. Seriously.
If I was so upset by the comment, I certainly wouldn’t have repeated in on a television show. I think she was looking for the oh no, you look beautiful. Life tends to be less cruel if you learn to develop a thick skin. Hormones are tricky little buggers, make you cry at the drop of a hat. BUT this is Anne we’re talking about…an actress who is used to hearing how beautiful she is. My theory for everything, wash your face, take a hot bath or if possible walk it off, meanwhile you’re walking away the baby fat.
THIS!! I think Ellen felt exactly the same way and wasn’t going to give it to her…just cause.
Anne just can’t drop “acting’ and what she thinks is vulnerable and relatable to me seems contrived and manipulative. It’s not manipulative for an evil purpose but it’s still lame….
You nailed it!
You’d be surprised how many women have already responded really well to what Anne said, and how many feel like they’ve had similar experiences. We live in a society where the experience of having a baby is boiled down to the number on the scale and how quickly you can get down to your pre-baby weight, where in reality recovering from pregnancy and childbirth goes way, way beyond that. I think it’s good to actually hear someone finally talk about being a new mom in a way that comes way closer to normal people’s experience than “I’m just over the moon”
Right on, Bridget! I’ve really enjoyed your comments in this thread. You must have been an awesome trainer.
Thanks @SloaneY! I realized that I was the crazy lady responding to everything on the thread today 🙂
I guess it’s different in every culture how long a woman is supposed to rest after giving birth? in China some doctors recommend 100 days of refraining from strenuous activity. I suppose if you can lift a baby, five pound weights isn’t too much, but breastfeeding and staying on top of sleep deprivation are a lot of work too! If I were a starlet with time and money I’d just want to rest.
yeah, a lot of other cultures are just more willing to recognize the burden on new mothers. Helps that grandparents tend to be around more, etc. We’ve taken a lot of that away but nobody’s really acknowledged there was a loss and new mothers really shouldn’t be doing all of this on their own. You’re lucky if you get 90 days maternity leave!
The way I read it was that she wasn’t telling a story about how this trainer was a horrible meanie, but about her own emotional reaction to his comment, caused by being a new mom with crazy hormones etc.
Getting your body moving and strong again after having a baby goes way beyond just losing the weight you’ve put on, despite the fact that society puts the emphasis on the pounds. For a trainer to callously just boil her down to “losing the baby weight” sucks, and while I wouldn’t have cried, there’s no way I would have hired him. How about asking her what her goals are first?
Exactly. I mean, it is a fairly normal question, but at the same time this is the gym she has been going to for a long time. A better question would be, “Glad to see you back, let me know if you need any pointers on the best postpartum workout”.
Oops, I said the same thing above before I scrolled down. Exactly – a good trainer doesn’t assume. They ask you what you want to achieve. I have had trainers ask me what my goals were when I was obviously in need of weight loss and it’s a lot nicer than having them decide that of course that’s your goal.
I’m sorry – did I miss something? There was no body shaming. She said she just had a baby seven weeks ago, and he responds in kind to that statement.
Did she want him to say “oh, you don’t look like you just had a baby”? Obviously that was the expectation and the reason for the tears (in addition to the hormones).
For once I would love to see a celebrity be unashamed and flaunt those pounds. Keep the “mommy confidence” and focus on the pride of carrying a child and giving birth rather than trying to keep up with all the other self-absorbed women out there.
KELT – So wanting to be healthy after baby and, God forbid, spending an hour of your day wanting to exercise to lose the baby weight/be healthy makes one self absorbed? What a judgmental thing to say.
How about saying “that’s great! So are you interested in working toward any goals in particular?”
I think kitten is saying it’s not necessary to give in to the pressure to get their prebody weight back and it would a nice example for regular moms. Instead of every celebrity acting like its so horrible to have some extra weight. Kitten is not shaming working out, thats my opinion anyway.
Random, useless thought of the day, but I wonder why Drew Barrymore and Anne Hathaway aren’t friends. They seem very similar to me, and I would imagine that they would have a lot in common, especially at this stage in their lives. I don’t know, I guess this just seems like such a Drew Barrymore story to me that it seems these two should get together for a play date soon.
Drew’s more hippy-dippy than Annie, though. I feel like they’d probably get annoyed with each other eventually. (But I do like the idea of setting them up on a fantasy play date. Haha!)
I can’t imagine that Anne smokes enough pot to hang with Drew.
See, this is funny to me because in my mind, Annie is a total pot head. Maybe not now, with child, but during her down time after winning the Oscar. Her husband seems like he keeps some of Willie’s Reserve in his back pocket at all times.
She smokes pot. Look at her hipster hubby. Just cause you look straight as an arrow, doesn’t mean you are.
What was wrong with that response? She told him she just had a baby and now she’s in the gym. What was he supposed to think when she said that and there she was in a gym? What woman isn’t trying to lose the baby weight after having a baby? Okay, there are a few lucky ones that aren’t. LOL
I get it when you’re sensitive about your body you want the response, oh, you look amazing, I can’t believe you just had a baby, but still, I thought his comment was fine.
This is random, but I have a couple of gym questions. Is it normal for people to “reserve” a weight machine in between sets, and is it rude to ask to work in? At my gym, even trainers working with clients will throw a towel on a machine while their client is doing floor work or whatever. And many of the guys will just hang out on a machine in between sets, looking at their phones. It drives me nuts because I do circuits, so all I need is to do 15 reps, and I don’t want to wait 10 minutes until you feel like completing your set. Am I being unreasonable?
Not when I went to a trainer in my gym, and he was one I was paying extra so not employed by the gym. He had a routine worked out but if someone else was using a machine he just adjusted it and we went to a different available machine, you can’t expect other people who are paying their fees to not be able to use machines?
If someone’s just standing/sitting at a machine though, feel free to ask them are they finished and if so, to move That’s just rude and selfish.
That used to happen to me all the time at my old gym when I did circuits and it drove me nuts.
I would absolutely go up to them if they’re just standing there and ask “are you done with this?” or “can I just squeeze in here for 15 reps while you rest?”
Hopefully that will clue them in on the fact that you’re waiting to use it (in case they don’t already know) and if that doesn’t work, say something to management. I’ve done that a few different times and I always get a swift response from the manager at my gym.
I had someone literally walk into the gym and stand behind me when I was on the elliptical and repeat over and over “are you done? That’s my machine. Are you done? My machine. It’s my machine. Are you done?” No. I was there first. Go away.
Ok now THAT is ridiculous. That would have guaranteed that I would be taking my sweet-ass time on the elliptical.
I’ve never seen wait lines for the cardio equipment but I’m never there after work and I mostly just take classes in the side studio.
Honestly, some of these horror stories make me really appreciate my gym. Plus we have free refrigerated eucalyptus towels and fruit-infused water lol.
What everyone else said. I’ve been at about half a dozen gyms in my lifetime so far and am so happy that at my current (a Y), there are finally enough machines to use. There might be a few peak times on some weekday evenings, but even then people seem to circulate.
Invariably there are not enough weight benches, though. Whatever N is needed, it’s always N minus 1. And in only 1 gym was there dedicated, protected floor space for stretching and whatever else. I do some weight work on the floor and have to find a safe little place to not be stepped on or have someone drop 50 lbs on my head.
Once I was waiting for a weight machine and some young fratty-looking dude was sitting on it checking his phone. I stood nearby trying to look politely patient but eventually had to say something because he was still sitting at the machine checking his phone. He was pretty bratty. I bet he never had to share his toys.
Also – let’s talk about the muscle men who lift 50, 75 lb. dumbbells but suddenly lose control when it comes time to place them on the ground. To me, that’s the real test of strength – to come to the end of your set and still be able to control your weight. I think they’re just showing off.
Those muscle-head dudes are hilarious to me. Then again, I date a guy who does yoga and spin so lol.
In another ten years I predict that they’re all going to really regret lifting weight that is too heavy for them. My big brother is still dealing with back problems from doing that 20 years ago.
Lol. My son is a gym rat now and he hates the lack of form and etiquette among some of the muscle head guys. He said the high school weight room is the worst, that it’s “always a mess,” not to mention full of snotty dude bros.
Some of the gyms I’ve gone to have had sign up sheets for the cardio machines, which eliminates the hovering and hogging.
OK, thanks y’all! I know I should say something, but I always just end up using a different machine and glaring at the offender, lol.
I’ve only recently become a regular gym-goer and am just navigating this myself. I work twice a week with a personal trainer, and they have their own section with exclusive equipment so getting a machine was rarely an issue. But I’ve started going by myself once or twice a week on top of my PT sessions, so I’ve come across this too.
While I try to go during off-peak hours, I have started doing the “rest at the machine between sets” because I was noticing that I’d “lose my place” and end up having to wait, thus losing my rhythm. I pump out my sets as quickly as possible but I want to get them in at once so that once I’ve walked away from the machine, I’m totally done with it. If I see someone’s waiting for it, I’ll tell them “hey I have one set left then it’s all yours” and they’re fine with it.
Those fishing gym trainers are the WORST. I am overweight and go to the gym but don’t use a trainer-so they’re always swimming around me, they come over and try to get you to admit you are working out to lose weight (so they can go into their schpeel) but when you just say you’re there for fun and don’t play into it, they get SO MAD. Now that I think about it its comparable to passing up a drink from a guy at the bar! Take it easy dude!
Holy sh*t. This actually happens to you? 🙁
That’s harassment, end of.
This actually makes me angry.
Y’all are really making me not want to go to a gym, ever! I’m just getting back to running after some time off and was thinking of joining up so that I could use the treadmills in the summer, but it just sounds like such a miserable experience!!
I got back to my pre-baby weight fast, like 3 months. but i went to a dsw about 4 weeks after giving birth to buy shoes for a wedding and the girl who was ringing me up asked me when i was due. i actually went home crying and my husband did call the store’s manager. i hope she got fired.
Well, she’s a new mother so I think because of the hormones and sleep deprivation, plus adjustment to changes and new routines she might be very emotional and gets easily affected by these kind of comments.
P.S. I loathe gyms because you always receive unwanted advice or attention from random strangers so when I go I try to put my music very loud and pretend to be very absorbed in my workout.
she’s only 7-8 weeks post partum…give your body a break and f* the gym! Like thigh gaps, baby weight just shouldn’t be a thing.
I also think weight gain in pregnancy is overblown and over monitored. You shouldn’t have to step on a scale at every visit. One glance at your initial weight on your chart, one glance at how you look now–if you haven’t gained 100 lbs, you’re fine. It’s all stupid. It all contributes to creating a stupid culture around womens’ bodies when it should be about health.
ITA. It takes nine months to put the weight on, it seems reasonable that it should take at least that long to take it off and get somewhat back to your old levels of fitness. I understand wanting to rush the weight loss, but it’s just not natural and wish people would lighten up.
It doesn’t really take 9 months to gain the weight. Most women with only have a tiny weight increase in the first month or two, and it’s completely normal to have only gained around 5lbs when you’re well into the second trimester. A lot of women with morning sickness actually lose weight up to that point. The major weight gain comes in the final months.
If you’ve stayed healthy and not gained extra weight on top of what was needed (no shade, I gain at least 10lbs of ice cream weight in addition to baby weight every pregnancy), once everything’s settled down you’ll only have 10-20lbs to lose. That’s not a lot, minor changes will get you there within a few months. It doesn’t have to be this terrible drawn out slog.
It is completely within the normal range to have only gained 5 lbs (with a singleton) even into your 2nd trimester, but it’s also important to note that many women who are also normal and healthy do not have bodies programmed to gain weight in this manner during pregnancy. During my pregnancy that went to term, I gained almost half of my total pregnancy weight (a normal, healthy 35-lb. gain with no gestational diabetes) in the first 15 weeks and was visibly pregnant by 9 weeks. My weight then basically plateaued for the 2nd trimester, without any attempt at calorie control on my part, and I gained weight in the 3rd trimester at a similar rate to the 1st trimester. I then lost all the pregnancy weight in 3 months with no special measures other than breastfeeding and gentle walking.
The problem with emphasizing a limited weight gain in the first half of pregnancy is that women whose pregnancy trajectory looks like mine may limit their calorie intake in an effort to follow the “ideal” weight curve, and this can be bad for both baby and mother if the mother is quite slim to begin with and/or is carrying multiples (multiples are a different ballgame, and your babies NEED that early weight gain if you’re carrying twins or more). Emphasizing healthy eating is infinitely more important than monitoring weight gain — unless you have a binge-eating disorder or gestational diabetes, if you eat healthily in pregnancy with plenty of protein and not too many high-glycemic index foods, your weight will almost always take care of itself.
I think they usually weigh you every week to make sure the baby is growing at a steady rate. If you aren’t gaining weight or are gaining too much it might be a problem with the baby or gestational diabetes. It’s not necessarily an excuse to berate moms about their weight gain.
Yes, my doc definitely emphasized that the size of the baby was the main concern and reason for checking weight every time.
oh, guess they didn’t bother explain that to me.
Imagine having to go on talk shows prepared with cute, time-filling anecdotes revealing ‘just enough’ but not too much information about your personal life. Imagine doing that not too long after a life-changing event that involved a year of major changes in your body. She’s doing her best, and she’s an actor, there’s going to be a little drama.
As for the trainer, I would think a simple, “Congratulations! Let me know how I can help” would work. Something like a seasoned saleslady at a good department store.
Nah, this was just a shallow young Hollywood trainer thinking that a) post-partum is all about getting back to that bikini bod and b) women are at the gym because of how they look not because of how they feel. In his limited experience, he was trying to “relate.” Maybe in the latter group so accurately described by GNAT (above — we need a cross-referencing function in CB!).
Speaking of trainers, there’s one staffer at my gym who just Won’t Shut Up. He buttonholes 1 or 2 people and talks and talks and talks in a loud, deep voice. Don’t know about what. People are finding it hard to break away. It’s so annoying!
I don’t think he said anything wrong given the context.
But… I don’t understand why she doesn’t have a trainer to work with her at home? If I was that famous and specially when feeling more sensitive I wouldn’t workout in a public gym.
Maybe she likes her gym, maybe it feels good to get out of the house, etc etc. Up to her.
Of course is up to her, but I think my point is valid too.
It is. To each their own.
Wouldn’t you rather have a trainer that actually asks what your goals are and what you’d like to work on, rather than just assume? Getting fit isn’t just about losing weight. Not to mention, it’s really poor salesmanship.
I said this above, but think of it this way: would YOU want a trainer to go up to you and say “hey, I can help you lose those extra pounds”?
It wasn’t hormones she wasn’t oversensitive – and that’s all pretty damn sexist. The guy was rude. There is no reason that mere weeks after having a baby she should have to be Hollywood thin. She was there to start slowly like you’re supposed to. She was feeling positive and good about her appropriate progress. It was arrogant and rude of him to assume that she was jumping right on bandwagon of racing to “lose all the baby weight” and that he was the guy to get her there.
F*ck that guy I’m team Anne on this one
Wait… what? How is that rude? He’s making a valid point. Oh! You just had a baby, obviously you’re in the gym to lose the baby weight. It’s not like he said, “yeah thought so, why are you still pudgy? Why aren’t you thin yet you big whale!” That is way over sensitive.
The media constantly portrays actresses who talk about loosing the baby weight, so this guy probably picked up on that. I really don’t see anything rude about it, it’s a gym where people usually go not for fun or to be healthy, quite often they go to lose weight and he must know that. We are reaching a point where you can’t say anything because you’ll always offend someone!
ugh…my (and most of) the trainers at my gym quit and I have leftover sessions, so finally this guy who just bought the training portion of the gym called me and what a misogynistic piece of crap. Apparently I need a “goddess” body now. Thankfully my husband had a good response “well you have one” (I definitely do not- not that I care)
Seriously, goddess bodies? Yucchhhhh!
Meanwhile, she KILLED IT last nite on James Corden in their rap battle!
@GingerNYC Thanks! I hadn’t seen that, but it was awesome. They were both good but I do think she was better. And who knew she could rap like that?
As for the trainer thing, I think she was just trying to to be relatable, which doesn’t always work for her.
The first time I tried on clothes at the mall after having my son, I cried. I cried as the lady handed me sizes through the door. I was hormonal, my body was a complete stranger to me after I had spent so many years keeping it in shape, and I felt like shit. So I really feel for Anne and can put myself in her shoes. Especially as she’s in an industry where her body is a huge part of her “assets” and not only she but everyone around her has focused on it constantly.
Moving through the post-menopausal years I sometimes feel like crying in the dressing room too.
Sounds like a completely made up story to me. She doesn’t have a personal trainer working through PP exercises with her – are you kidding me? No way is she going to a gym and trying to figure out some routine on her own.
Thank you for saying what I thought but was too fearful to say! I saw it real time and my immediate reaction was this is BS and she’s trolling for Ellen and the audience to boost her up. The expression on Ellen’s as she finished face was priceless….ya,ya,ya you’re not going to get a “you look amazing” from me
You don’t cry when some jackass makes an ugly remark about your appearance. You tell them to F off and go on about your day without giving the person another thought. Some stranger has that much power over you??
she looks seriously sleep-deprived.
the gym can freakin’ WAIT.
She actually looks good. It’s more of her Princess Diaries body than the Les Miz body. To be honest I did not like her Les Miz body. It was too thin. Yes she played a starving doxy but still she never put the weight back on until after she was pregnant. You look good Annie, keep doing what you’re doing.
Well, nowadays abuse and insult and shaming equals counselling.
Their sales pitch typically involves creating or reinforcing insecurity about the potential clients body and/or lack of results. The gym equivalent of being upsold eye or wrinkle cream at a cosmetics counter.
YEP. I get that a lot of people wouldn’t be offended (and I don’t think the guy should be hung out to dry or anything), but I would be horrified if a trainer that worked for me used a tactic like that. Ask questions, don’t make assumptions. No matter the size of the person, they deserve to be treated as more than just a number on the scale.
This is one of those “anecdotes” that I wouldn’t see the point in telling. But I get it. She’s at home nursing and being tired and doesn’t have many stories to share on daytime tv.
Im actually glad she said this.
Dont ever assume why someone is at the gym!
You should just figure they are there for the same reason as everyone else, to get exercise!
This is on par with the condescending “thumbs up! I gotchya” wink thing that people do when they see a fat person exercising. Like, ‘Im going to give you props because obviously your exercising to lose weight and I fully support that you be thinner’ not because you are a human being who wants to exercise (like everyone else who exercises).
Maybe Anne just wanted to go to gym because thats what shes always done, not because she was pressuring herself at this stage to lose the “baby” weight. I can totally see how that comment would piss her off and make her cry.
The whole “how i lost the baby weight” industry needs to die a quick death. I would love for an actress to be like, “im not talking about “baby weight” or anything like that because its sexist.” Its just another way of exploiting a woman’s insecurity to sell products and personal trainer services.
Im going to imagine a world where women’s bodies are there own, and if her body changes shes allowed to decide in the privacy of her own head, if and/or how or when she deals with it.
Trainers see us as projects. I’ve had trainers say the most insensitive things to me over the decades of working out in gyms. “What are your goals? Lose weight, obviously. What else?” and “You aren’t fat. You need to lose weight, but you aren’t fat.” But the worst was, “I see you in here a lot, but you aren’t making any changes to your body. Would you like some tips on how to make your workout work for you?”
I know, I know. Hustling for work. None of them got hired. I even reported the last one and didn’t go back. Sure, I was pregnant and stopped working out because of morning sickness, but I might have quit just to make sure the management gave that guy hell for driving me away.
Well, she should grow up. Too sensitive. She is in a biz that heavily prizes her looks.
Then again, she is an insecure neurotic actress. She will never have to grow up.
To me, it is more if a reflection of women and how they should feel about themselves and their bodies. Like, it is expected that a woman’s primary goal after child birth is to get their body back. Whatever the hell that means. Are there seriously THAT many grown women that care so much about their bodies pleasing others? Feminism, take a seat. I see posts from ‘feminists’. The same people seem the most insecure about their bodies and are obsessed with the gym and eating and have eating disorders. It comes across as hypocrisy. If you are so proud of your female form and female identity, why don’t you embrace it?
I saw the show.
She’s been to the gym 3 times since she had the baby.
And I think she was being self-deprecating.
Lighten up. ..
I dont see what was so rude about what he said. Most people, if someone in the gym says “oh yeah i had a baby ______ ago” are going to assume youre there working off baby weight.
She’s annoying because she’s always so actor-y, but her story was completely fine. If your best friend told it, you’d think it was endearing and funny.
Eh. I feel for her. Last night my kickboxing trainer said something about my huge legs and I took pause because I’ve always been insecure about my legs.