I’m Californian and as CB said, we don’t really know how to use the phrase “Bless her/his heart” correctly. I’m still in the CB/Kaiser School for Proper Use of Southern Phrases but I’m going to try to get them to sign off on a “Bless his heart” here for Drake’s new tattoos. Drake recently added three new pieces of art to his prolific collection. All three are the work of the gentleman photographed with Drake above, Swedish tattoo artist Niki Norberg. Niki is very talented and the work on all three is very good. At no point do my comments pertain to the execution of design. But I do have comments…
The first one is not so bad and makes sense given the popularity of Drake’s new single More Life. The pink hibiscus emoji is being used to promote the song on social media and OVO is using the bee in its promotion:
Okay, so not bad. And, we get a nice close-up of Drake’s shoulder, which is a plus for me because arms are one of my weaknesses. Gosh, we are off to such a good start, maybe we should just quit here. But I’m trying for that “Bless his heart” sign off, darn it, so I need to show I can use it properly.
Next up, another example of Drake’s adulation. If there is one thing we know about Drake, he loves to honor folks by putting their faces on his person. His back boasts the faces of his mom next to a portrait of his uncle and grandmother. And his pop’s mug shot earned a spot on Drake’s arm. He advertised his obsession with the late singer Aaliyah by adding her to the family photo album on his back. Of course, his-one-and-only-but-not-right-now Rihanna is eating ice cream on his bicep plus he got a matching, cheeky, little camouflage shark for her. The shark was cute… and subtler, for Drake – it showed maturity. But then he did this:
Right? Okay, well sit down for this next bit. Although a longtime inspiration to Drake, he met Sade for the first time last week. Way to dial it up to eleven, Drizzy. I love the autograph. I would have been cooing if that was his tribute. But apparently he applies as much subtly to his homages as he does his wooing techniques.
And that leads us to our last entry, which, really is just best viewed:
I know, I get it – Drake’s old Twitter handle was @DrakkardNoir. There is probably a boatload of meaning behind this, but there is just no reason to put an off-kilter bottle of this foul-smelling cruising juice on your arm! Even if you are being ironic just… I can’t. My mind is not flexible enough for the mental gymnastics I need to get on board with this one. Maybe it’s a visceral reaction because seeing the bottle invokes a phantom scent from when my old roommate used to bathe in it before his dates.
There is still unmarked skin left so we know Drake isn’t done. Maybe J-Lo will get her star on the Drake Torso of Fame. I’m sure he’s already sketching out Nicki Minaj’s special artwork. Pretty soon it will be a status diss to say, “You’re so unknown, you’re not even inked on Drake.”
Bless his heart… (CB Note: approved)
Photo credit: Instagram and WENN Photos
i used to hate it on my dad.
but after he’s passed away, i sometimes find myself spritzing some on his old sweater and wear it whenever i needed a dad hug. it sounds creepy, right?
Not creepy to me at all, my mother died when I was eleven and I have a blanket that is a copy of the one that we had on the couch to watch tv together. When I am sick or just having a bad patch in life it feels like a comfort that reminds me of her caring nature.
I do the same with my dad’s cologne and I wear his shirts sometimes too.
Not creepy at all, it’s sentimental.
My dad passed away ten years ago, I was a teenager at the time. When I go through one of those moments where I feel like I’m forgetting his voice, can’t fully remember something we lived together or just that I miss him, I take his old coat out of its box. It still smells like him and, weirdly, it makes me feel like a part of him is there with me. It’s really quite difficult to explain in a more “rational” way.
Not creepy, I smell brut and it immediately brings my Papi back to me … *sigh*
Drake is so delightfully corny
No it’s not creepy. I hated my grandmother’s White Diamonds but I spray a little on from time to time with her old bottle of it I’ve kept. It’s nice.
Is that tattoo of Drakkar Noir even real? It might be a temporary tat right? When I first moved to the US many years ago I used to love to wear a lot of cologne. In my culture wearing a lot of it was cool. But as time went by and I adapted to American culture I started to dislike strong smells on both men and women. If Latin people only wore a little cologne or perfume it would be okay but some of them apply way too much and it is nauseating. Nothing can beat taking a shower and just applying deodorant and perhaps a touch of a nice fragrance. I sometimes hear how Americans refer to wearing a lot of perfume/cologne as Puerto Rican showers.
I wonder about that myself. it LOOKS fake to me. I wonder if he’s just trolling people to see if they freak out about it.
So confused, that’s amazing tattoo. I’m impressed with the tattooist skills! But, Drakka-nooooo. I smell that in a club and want to run far away. Or, dance reallly slowly with hammer pants and a flat-top fade.
Most of his tattoo choices have always been so weird.. like a random piece of paper that you draw whatever you’re thinking on with no coherence.
The Sade one was well done, I’ll give him that.
Ikkk. Years ago I was put off from dating someone that slathered himself with Drakkar. The scent was just too too much.
What. A. Loser.
What next, a bottle of Grey Goose, Cristal or Macallan?
He is Steve Urkel in a hip hop halloween costume.
I snortled at that.
To this day I have no idea what anyone sees in Drake. Horrible whiny voice, eminently punchable face, total NiceGuy attitude…. Ugh.
I mean they’re well done, but the choice leaves much to be desired. His body must look like such a patchwork of random stuff. That Drakkar Noir one will not age well… No bueno.
I mean, if the Drakkar Noir tattoo was the only one he was ever going to get I might think it was an awful choice. But he has a lot of tattoos and could get a lot more so I’m sure it’s meaningful to him in some way and it’s fine.
I don’t know Sade nor how she thinks but this would creep me out.
“Bless his heart” Priceless!
I sort of worship at the Church of Sade, and while I probably wouldn’t get her tattooed on my body, it is a good piece of work. As for the rest of them…God Bless 🙂 no shade
Good God. Why would you tattoo these random things/people on yourself? What a silly thing to do.
Aww, you guys hating on the drakkar noir! That cologne so takes me back to high school and the boy who took my virginity. 😊
Ditto. I know it’s cheesy, but I’ve always liked the smell.
Me too!! No shame! When Drakkar became too cliche, I bought my boyfriend Cool Water, which was similar but slightly less unctuous. It smells like my early-90s college years, and can bring all those emotions back in a rush…mostly good, definitely memorable, but still substantially cringeworthy.
Drake is EXTRA. I’m disappointed Drake and J-Lo didn’t last longer☹️
I don’t know why but this made me think of Titus Andromedon’s Peeno Noir song.(Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt)..😂
My mind immediately went to the Peeno Noir music video at the mere mention of Drakkar Noir. Glad I’m not alone. Titus in everything.
It makes me smile just thinking about it!
I’m from Kentucky and there are many nuances to the phrase ‘bless your heart’. It can mean what most non-Southerners think. That it’s saying what an idiot or an idiotic thing to do. Then there’s the other meaning when someone’s gone through really hard times when you say – well bless their heart. Meaning you’re showing sympathy. In Drake’s case I think I’d apply both meanings. He got those ugly tattoos? Bless his heart (i.e. idiot) He’ll wake up one day and realize how stupid he was to get bad tattoos like a lot of kids (Miley I’m looking at you). Well bless his heart (i.e. sympathy)