We’re coming up on Princess Charlotte’s second birthday. Which means it’s time for the Daily Mail’s royal reporters to take stock of the long-simmering beef between Prince William and his father, Prince Charles, and how William uses his children to passive-aggressively poke at his father. We’ve heard before that Charles rarely sees his only grandchildren. Some of those stories even came from Charles’ camp, probably in a “two can play that passive-aggressive game, William” way, in an effort to paint Charles as a comfy, grandfatherly, sympathetic type. William’s camp, on the other hand, always paints Charles as distant and too work-obsessed to actually schedule time with his grandkids. So, the latest from the Daily Mail is just more of the same, but I found it interesting. You can read the full piece here. Some highlights:

Charlotte attends church with the Middletons. One member of the Middletons’ congregation tells what is supposed to be a charming story of how Charlotte talked loudly through one church service. But the real story is pro-Middleton: the Middletons are so normal and homey and of course they regularly attend church with their children and grandchildren.

The Idyllic Life of Bucklebury Manor. Charlotte and George are described as “frequent visitors to the Middletons’ £4.7 million home, Bucklebury Manor,” which is where they can “run around the 18-acre grounds, dip their fingers in the pond teeming with frog spawn, or collect eggs from the chicken coop.”

The second housekeeper. William and Kate insist that Anmer Hall will still be their full-time home, even if they are making a big deal about moving back to London in the late summer. The DM notes, “As if to emphasise the point, they’ve just employed a second full-time housekeeper [at Anmer].”

Charlotte’s Middleton eyes. Many have commented that while George looks strikingly like his father, save for George’s big, brown eyes. Apparently, Charlotte also has “distinctive, dark ‘Middleton eyes’ according to her mother.” All of this is very strange because Kate actually has kind of hazel-y eyes which are not dark.

Charlotte’s life. She does art projects with her mom and Spanish Nanny Maria buys Charlotte lots of Spanish baby clothes. Having a daughter has reportedly made William “more vulnerable.”

Prince Charles has little-to-no influence with his grandkids. Charles is “pragmatic” about not seeing the grandkids, although he does “rant and rail” about it privately. Charles “more often than not he caves in to his notoriously truculent eldest son over everything from his career decisions to money.” Charles is worried that if he presses the issue, he’ll NEVER see the grandkids. But as it is, Charles has barely seen Charlotte in these two years. Unlike the Middletons, who are described as “virtually part-time nannies’ to the children.” William and Kate have an open-door policy for Carole and Michael, and Carole and Mike often do “pop around” unannounced.

Bill Middleton is really happening. One source says, “William chose the Middletons as his surrogate family long ago, even before the children were born. He has nailed his colours to the mast in that respect.”

Charles works, William doesn’t. Charles’ schedule is fully booked six months in advance and he works constantly. William obviously does not, and the DM notes: “while Charles’s own schedule is arranged meticulously six to seven months in advance, William and Kate’s office at Kensington Palace is notoriously tardy in confirming their diary.”

Will & Kate are making conscious choices: A source says: “Let’s just say they haven’t really done anything to make it easy for him. Charles does the best he can, but there are constraints.”

[From The Daily Mail]

It strikes me that Charles was hoping to create a situation similar to what he enjoyed with his grandparents, King George VI and the Queen Mother. He was very young when his grandfather died, but he was close to his grandmother for as long as she lived. She was the motherly figure in his life, as opposed to his own mother, and he probably wanted to have the same kind of emotional intimacy with his own grandchildren (also: Lord Mountbatten was a grandfatherly/debauched-uncle-type in his life too). So… William keeps playing this dangerous game. One day, Charles will have enough of it, and Bill Middleton’s tantrums will blow up in his face. Or perhaps Carole Middleton’s machinations will blow up in her face. Maybe all of the above.

Photos courtesy of WENN, Fame/Flynet.