Melania Trump is releasing a memoir about how she’s ‘defined personal excellence’

Last week, the Democrats-in-disarray story overshadowed the Republican National Convention. It was good news/bad news. The good news is that fewer people were indoctrinated with MAGA bile because people were more focused on the Democrats. The bad news was that the RNC was a lunatic convention and Democrats should have been messaging the electorate about how they were the much better option. In any case, that was one bigger moment which I sort of ignored: Melania Trump turned up in Milwaukee on the final day of the RNC. Melania has been absent from all of her husband’s court appearances and absent from the campaign trail. She just stays at Mar-a-Lago, where she’s only contractually obligated to go to dinner with her husband five nights out of seven. Well, Ol’ Mel might actually be seen outside of Mar-a-Lago this fall, because she’s got a new grift in time for the final stretch of the election cycle: she’s “written” a “memoir.” Bless her heart.

“Do u” care to hear from former first lady Melania Trump? The wife of Republican presidential nominee/perpetual defendant Donald Trump is set to release her first memoir, Melania, this fall, her office announced Thursday. The book is being framed as the “powerful and inspiring story of a woman who has carved her own path, overcome adversity and defined personal excellence. The former first lady invites readers into her world, offering an intimate portrait of a woman who has lived an extraordinary life.”

The memoir will be published by Skyhorse Publishing, which has also printed titles by Trump allies such as former New York City Mayor Rudolph Giuliani and attorney Alan Dershowitz, as well as presidential hopeful Robert F. Kennedy Jr. An official release date for the book has not yet been announced.

Melania Trump’s website lists the book as available for pre-order at three prices, all touting “stories and images never before shared with the public”: A $40 standard hardcover edition, available signed for $75, and a $150 collector’s edition, which is also signed and, according to the release, is “printed on premium art paper with a special custom white binding and adorned with black foil, blocking, and a ribbon marker.” If your interests beyond the former first lady also include the blockchain, Melania Trump has fantastic news for you: The collector’s edition comes with an optional digital collectible, “minted on the Solana blockchain.”

Thursday became a his-and-hers announcement day, as Donald Trump, too, shared that he’ll release a photo book, Save America, on son Don Jr.’s publishing imprint, Winning Team Publishing. It carries a $99 price tag for photos of Donald’s recent campaign, with captions reportedly written by the candidate. The cover features an image of Donald raising his fist onstage following the recent assassination attempt. That book is due out September 3, and is available for pre-order. A signed edition costs $499.

[From Vanity Fair]

Donald Trump is releasing a “picture book” with captions he wrote himself? And the cover is that dumbf–k raised-fist stunt after he got fake-shot? Well, that’s interesting. As for Melania’s memoir… ghostwritten, I’m sure. What surprises me is that she hasn’t released a coffee-table book about herself – like, her White House fashion, or her holiday decorating or whatever. I remember, she did a lot of photoshoots at the White House. Where are all of those photos? Here’s the real question though… most MAGAts are illiterate, so will they even buy Mel’s book?

Photos courtesy of Avalon Red, Cover Images.

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58 Responses to “Melania Trump is releasing a memoir about how she’s ‘defined personal excellence’”

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  1. Naked porn star has defined no personal excellence. She will always be a naked porn star period.

    • Megan says:

      Seriously. What could she possibly say that anyone would want to read?

      • Renae says:

        Better question: What does she have that anyone would want to ogle? (Psst, Mel, we’ve already seen EVERYTHING).
        “personal excellence”…. how to moisturize 24/7…….magazine reading 101…..decorating for (f##k ) Christmas…..
        I don’t really care……do you?

    • Jais says:

      Eh, I don’t care if she was a naked porn star if it was all consensual. I care that she was an OG birther with her trash husband. She can F-all the way outta here.

      • kt says:

        indeed. no need to insult [consensual] sex work. she’s complicit in plenty of other things we can get after her on.

      • H says:

        This kind of retort is so interesting. A lot of people do not agree that porn is ethical and beyond critique, consensual or not. I get that mainstream feminism and lefties have moved in a totally embracing way of sex work of all types but many have not. Basically having no/few scruples about who one is with as long as there is money involved- maybe that is worthy of criticism.

    • StillDouchesOfCambridge says:

      And she fckin dug up the rose garden of the first ladies. Some of them were a 100 years old!

      • Meredith says:

        I’m going to stick up for her (not really her— really the actual landscape planner) for making that garden more accessible to everyone in compliance with federal disability rights laws.

    • Renae says:

      Sure, she defined *personal excellence*…..DOWNWARD.

    • Meredith says:

      I have nothing against porn stars. I hate Melania Trump for being complicit in the evil of DJT, and with his adult children and their spouses.

  2. Amy Bee says:

    That’s a good question about a book about Melania’s White House fashion. I would have thought she’d have brought a book like that first before a memoir. I’m going guess that her memoir is going have a dagger next to it when it hits the NYT bestsellers list.

    • Dainty Daisy says:

      @Amy Bee, i love her fashion sense. Would not mind buying a book with some styling tips.

  3. JanetDR says:

    Unbelievable! Except not really 😂
    I am so ready for the grifting to stop.

    • BeanieBean says:

      Donnie’s got A LOT of legal bills to pay; you know he’s got a piece of this.

  4. pottymouth pup says:

    let me guess, it will be titled “The Light I carry”

  5. Mireille says:

    “The book is being framed as the “powerful and inspiring story of a woman who has carved her own path, overcome adversity and defined personal excellence.”
    –The story of self-described model who overextended her visa stay in the U.S. to land either a catalog gig or a rich husband, and without success of achieving either, ended up with Donald Trump.

    Slovenia, please, please, please take her back.

  6. HeatherC says:

    This tracks. Michelle Obama released a memoir after all.

  7. Andrea says:

    How to snag a repulsive weak narcissistic man. Sounds like a riveting novel!

  8. Tursitops says:

    Retroactive justification for her “genius” visa grift.

  9. martha says:

    Be Better

  10. MichaelaCat says:

    Trump cheated on all three of his wives.

    I am not 100% convinced she isn’t just trolling.

  11. Chantal1 says:

    The real question is, how much of it will be plagiarized? After all, s did shamelessly plagiarize Michelle Obama’s entire speech (and never apologized) so…

    Both of them should stick to picture books/photo spreads. Is MAGA really going to pay those prices for either book, esp considering the other grifts they have going to cover his legal expenses? Eh, I don’t really care, do you?

  12. Jayna says:

    Bahahahahahahahaha!!!! Thanks for the laugh this morning.

  13. Justpassingby says:

    The « images never before shared with the public” are already available online:
    https://www.yahoo.com/lifestyle/g-strings-caped-coats-melania-213943578.html

  14. Maggie says:

    I mean we already know how she got here. She was introduced to Donnie Dump via Jeffery Epstein, somehow got an Einstein Visa, and brought her parents along. She’s been a kept wife for the last twenty years….so what is she going to write a whole book about?🤣

  15. Amy T says:

    This is hilarious. I cannot wait to read a library copy.

  16. Pinkosaurus says:

    None of this book will be true and I’m sure is only going to be used to make otherwise unallowable payments to the Trumps from sketchy organizations “buying books”. I would, however, like to hear the real story about how many times she’s renegotiated her prenup by going on strike. She’s a one-woman labor union!

    • SarahCS says:

      That’s the thing, her grift is both horrifying and fascinating to me. If someone wrote a full and accurate account of how she’s done it (and they were guaranteed none of the proceeds) I’d actually read that. It would make my blood boil but would be interesting.

  17. sevenblue says:

    That is how they grift. She is gonna release the book, RNC is gonna buy a buttload of it, making it NYT best seller and funneling money to Trump in a legal way. That is how all the Republican books made it into the best seller list.

    • BlueNailsBetty says:

      Exactly. GOP voters aren’t known for being readers and they don’t buy the books put out by their idols. The people buying the books do so en masse to launder money.

      It’s. All. A. Grift.

    • Lulu says:

      Isn’t that what happened with Junior’s book? Trump made the RNC buy thousands. She is selling signed copies for a higher price, for sure RNC will have to buy those.

    • Alice B. Tokeless says:

      That’s how Ann Coulter got rich.

  18. Sumodo1 says:

    Oh shoot! I was looking forward to seeing those gothic blood red Christmas trees with Melania providing the narrative.

  19. Grandma Susan says:

    There are not enough laugh or vomit emojis in this world.

  20. Trillion says:

    I love old hookers, but I’ll make an exception for Melania

  21. ML says:

    Whoever is handling the Trump campaign communications is desperately trying to pivot away from sofa sex, age, debate no shows, racism, misogyny, Project 2025, white male conservatism, etc, by shoving Melania into the news. Good luck with that.

  22. Jaded says:

    Title: “My Life and How I F*cked My Way to the Top”

  23. Lisa says:

    how to stifle your sense of smell long enough to get pregnant by a dictator and chain migrate your family while spouting birther trash – I dont really care do you

  24. Anonymous says:

    I propose ” Fuck Kreeesmas” for the title. The fact that she’s even still in the picture with him shows she’s just as big a grifter as he is. Unless she’s hoping this will help build her “Get the hell of dodge” fund faster. You know Tramp will try and wiggle out of that prenup if she bolts.

  25. girl_ninja says:

    Gross. Just gross.

  26. Thelma says:

    I thought this was a joke. 😂😂😂

  27. phlyfiremama says:

    I don’t really care, do you?

    Yeah, personal excellence personified: Laziest 1st lady ever, hooker, doormat to a serial abuser and assaulter, ugly on the inside. She has those DOWN!!

  28. Veronica S. says:

    LMAO, they really are such blatant grifters. Amazing how many can’t see through it.

    You know who’s memoir I would pay to read, though? Stormy Daniels. Especially if he loses in November. I want to enjoy knowing she was part of his takedown.

  29. Alice B. Tokeless says:

    Defined it?!?!?! She can’t even SPELL it!!!

  30. Kat says:

    Didn’t peg Mel as a comedy writer.

  31. bisynaptic says:

    “white binding”

  32. SIde Eye says:

    NPD is so fascinating. Agent Orange could not even give her one day to announce her book – he turned it into a his and her announcement – a picture book lol which of course they will gravitate to before hers cause his rabid Kotex over the ear minions can’t read. Gotta love how everything is always about him. Anyway, some title suggestions for chapters.

    Chapter 1: Epstein and my Meet Cute

    Chapter 2: A Life of Leisure (if I look the other way)

    Chapter 3: My Anchor Baby, and Chain Migration

    Chapter 4: A storm is coming! I Prepared With a $50,000 coat.

    Chapter 5: Harmless Locker Room Talk

    Chapter 6: F*** Christmas

    Chapter 7: I don’t really care, do you?

    Chapter 8: Just Die Already

    Chapter 9: You’re Still Here?

    Chapter 10: Double Trouble

    Chapter 11: Still Waiting