Last week, Dave Coulier announced that he’d been diagnosed with Stage 3 non-Hodgkin lymphoma. (NHL is a form of blood cancer that begins in your lymphatic system.) He told Today that what led to him getting tested was discovering a “golf-ball sized” lump in his groin that popped up about a week after he’d had a cold. In the past, he’d notice swollen lymph nodes while he was sick, but never to that extreme. Thankfully, Dave’s form of cancer is treatable. Because the cancer hasn’t spread to his bone marrow, Dave said that his chances of making a full recovery are as high as 90%.
On Monday, Dave’s good friend and former Full House co-star, John Stamos, made a post on Instagram to show his support. The post had pictures of John wearing a bald cap as he shaved Dave’s head. There was also a picture of the two of them posing together post-head shaving, making it look like they were both bald. The fact that John was wearing a bald cap and didn’t actually shave his famous locks was controversial, though, with people arguing about the gesture and his intentions in the comments.
“Nothing like throwing on a bald cap and flexing some Photoshop skills to show some love and solidarity with my bro @dcoulier,” Stamos captioned the pictures. “You’re handling this with so much strength and positivity—it’s inspiring. I know you’re going to get through this, and I’m proud to stand with you every step of the way. I love you (p.s. — @melissacoulier is the most wonderfulest — your true life line!).”
Several commenters took issue with Stamos not actually shaving his head.
“What a shallow gesture! Couldn’t even cut your hair off for your friend. And you made sure to post it on Instagram to get those likes too,” one person commented.
“Uncle Jessie could never cut his hair,” another person wrote.
“God bless Dave 🙏🏻 but is this really appropriate?” someone else pointed out. “A bald cap is showing solidarity? You can just take your cap off and be ‘normal’ again. When people take this route they actually shave their head. I can’t help but feel that you’re using Dave’s diagnoses as a way to make yourself more likeable.”
Coulier responded hours later to the negative comments with a post of his own on his Instagram page.
“I’m sorry to see a bunch of negative comments as I’ve just begun my cancer journey,” he wrote. “It’s our friendship (me and John) and this is how we are handling a very tough time. I’m a comedian and humor is what drives me. John knows how to cheer me up and I laughed out loud when he arrived wearing a bald cap – being a true loving friend and brother.”
He went on to highlight “so many people” who were inspired by his story to check in with their doctors about health concerns.
“I’m choosing to spread the word about early cancer detection to help people. That’s just who I am,” he wrote, concluding with: “I wish nothing but love for all of you.”
There were also plenty of people who had no problem with Stamos.
“Awwww this is so cute … also, to anyone in the comments.. if Dave isn’t offended by this, you shouldn’t be either ☺️ and remember .. John is an actor and may need his hair for his JOB. This should be a space filled with positivity and hope.. take the negativity elsewhere,” one person commented.
“This is fantastic ❤️❤️❤️❤️,” wrote “Full House” star Candace Cameron Bure.
“You’re a good friend Charlie Brown. Dave is a trooper. All three of you will get through this!” someone else commented.
“You guys look great!” another person raved.
Coulier also said he was planning to get together with Stamos after his second round of chemotherapy.
“We’re going to have so many laughs. We’re going to have so much fun,” Coulier said. “I said, ‘It could be ‘Weekend at Bernie’s’ if I’m just out of it.’ And (Stamos) said, ‘That’s OK. I’ll carry you around.’”
After Dave made that post defending John, John’s wife, Caitlin, showed up in his comments to shame everyone for being mean to her husband:
I really hope the people who chose to say cruel things about my husband—who flew across the country and did what he could do bring joy to his friend going through chemo—look inward. Instead of tearing down others, take that time to think about how you can bring joy to the people you love.
I don’t know, bitches. At the surface level, it does look like John was making a well-intentioned but superficial gesture by wearing a bald cap instead of shaving his head in solidarity. I understand the point people are making about how he can just take the cap off and go back to normal life. But, honestly, if Dave said that he thought it was hilarious and that it cheered him up, then John successfully did what he set out to do: Make his friend feel supported and not alone in his cancer battle. These kinds of situations are unique to the people who are involved and their relationship with one another. Who are we to tell someone they’re wrong for feeling comforted by a friend’s gesture?
Just like when Jenna Fischer revealed that she’d been fighting breast cancer for the last year, Dave also used his diagnosis to urge fans to do their annual preventative cancer screenings and not put off getting any potential symptoms checked out. So, here’s your periodic reminder to schedule those recommended exams, and not to ignore it when it feels like something is not right with your body.
The bald cap is cringe but I don’t think it was intended to be disrespectful. Stamos is like a lot of guy — lacking self awareness. Hope Dave gets through this healthy and cured. F!ck cancer.
I think its cringe when people actually shave their hair ‘in solidarity’
Stamos probably thought it was a big enough sacrifice just to look bald temporarily. If Coultier liked it, fine, but the gesture was pretty damn shallow.
I remember when I lost my hair during chemo, I felt less feminine. Perhaps John Stamos was afraid if he shaved his head, he’d be like Samson and less masculine. Whatever. If Dave is okay with it, then I guess the rest of us have to accept it too. Even if it was pretty shallow imo.
I had the opposite reaction when I lost my hair to chemo. I was thrilled I didn’t have a misshapen head and so I rocked it and didn’t get a wig. I bet Stamos thought it was good enough to wear a bald cap. If Dave was okay with it then I guess it’s okay.
John Stamos is a garbage person who participated in a s-xual assault and was bold enough to make a joke about it in an interview.
Edit to add – went digging and here’s the quote from Gawker quoting the original article: (found it on discussion board)
“…When Jane magazine asked the Olsen twins’ erstwhile Uncle Jesse about the worst thing he’d ever done to screw someone over, he provided this character-destroying anecdote: “[In the mid-’80s], I was in a band. I was playing somewhere in Finland, and there was a girl hanging around who was really drunk and interested in me. I wasn’t into her, but my friend was.”
Sadly, the fact that the former “Full House” star was in a band isn’t the most disturbing part of this tale. John, please continue: “So the girl came back to my hotel, and I turned the lights down, and we started making out. I said, ‘Hold on a second, I’ve gotta go brush my teeth.’ It was dark, I left the room, and I sent in my friend who looked like me. [etc.]”
Eww…
that’s disgusting
I think of this every time I see him.
@lucy2 – same. Just doing my little bit here to ensure more people do too!
Meh, this wasn’t a post about being a supporter of cancer victims on the whole. This was a post about John and Dave. It is what worked for them and their situation/relationship. When by best friend (a single mom) was diagnosed with a very rare aggressive form of brain cancer at the age of 29, we teased her a lot bc she loved it. It made her laugh when she was genuinely terrified. It is what worked for us. We also showed up in every other way possible.
And let’s be real, the vast majority of ppl you see if ppl shaving their heads in solidarity or just clout chasing. It’s why it ends up on sm. They are doing it for likes.
YES about the clout chasing. One of my oldest friends battled leukemia when we were in primary, and because it was a smallish private school, it was pretty closeknit and there was a lot of support for her all through our school community. But then there were these 2 girls a grade ahead of us AND THEIR MOMS who unilaterally decided to cut their hair to make a wig for her. My friend barely knew these girls, much less their moms, and not even any of us who were actually close to her repeated the gesture. She was a quirky, confident kid who kinda had fun with her unique new look and didn’t WANT a wig, but they didn’t bother to ask! (The kicker? IIRC, the cut hair was too short for a wig anyway.)
This happened in the mid-late ’90s, so I have to think that that situation would have to potential to become even more weird and presumptuous nowadays when they could post photos and video of their oh-so-selfless gesture all over social media.
Thanks for being able to read through my typos.
But seriously, considering how prevalent cancer is, I’ve never seen anyone in real life walking around bald in solidarity with someone with cancer. I’m sure there are a few genuine examples, but like I said, few.
Ick for the hair-cutting/wig without even asking. If someone did that for me I would thank them for helping someone else.
PSA from a Stage 2 breast cancer survivor: if you want to get a shoulder-length wig made out of someone’s/your own hair, you need to grow it down to your mid-back & cut it all off a certain way (too long to type here – there are videos online) to make it possible to add to a wig. And then…you need to do it twice more to collect enough hair. Adults who cut & donate their shoulder-length hair have their hair used in wigs for younger kids.
I lost my hair during chemo. Personally, the last thing I wanted was for one of my loved ones to do this for me. Main reason: it feels like the person is somehow hijacking your disease, if that makes sense. You don’t have cancer, so you don’t get to join me in just this one aspect of the misery. I hope this makes sense..
Lenneke, it definitely makes sense. I’ve been through the cancer battle twice myself. God bless everyone who means well but you haven’t been through the pain, needles, puke, diarrhea, etc. It’s so hard to understand this mother fu**ing disease unless you’ve lived it.
I hope you’re doing well now.
If the intent was to cheer up his friend and it worked, great! My question is, why do we need a photo shoot to get publicity for an empty gesture? If the intent was to get good publicity off of your friend’s misfortune, you aren’t a good person.
It seems like Dave viewed this as his friend supporting him, making him laugh, and helping him spread the word about early cancer screening. I don’t want to ruin that for someone fighting cancer. I wish you a speedy recovery Dave. You are blessed to have family and friends who love you.
if he wasnt a grapist less people would care
but since no one cares that he is a grapist, this is what we have
maybe every thing you do doesnt need to be a picture on social media, esp if you are a grapist
When my aunt went through chemo in 2015, I shaved my head in solidarity with her because she cried about losing her hair. But I am not an actor known for their hair nor am I afraid of going bald so it was an easy choice for me. I love the gesture in that Dave loved it. That’s it. The way people feel folks have to respond to situations the way they do is annoying AF.