Instead of running a good Mel Gibson cover story this week, The National Enquirer decided to just go with a solid “Whitney Houston is a crackhead” story. This could have been written at any point over the last ten years, but whatever. There’s good dirt in here. Apparently, Whitney’s still heavy into drugs, to the point where she’s more crack smoke than flesh and blood. While Whitney was on tour in Europe, her entourage was pouring thousands of dollars into the local drug communities to support Whitney’s habit:

With Whitney’s drug habit raging out of control, her entourage recruited a drug dealer who sold her $6,000 worth of cocain during a tour stop in June, as eyewitness to the deal told the Enquirer.

Although Whiteny claimed to be drug-free during her interview with Oprah, she was actually high as a kite at the time, said a source. Now an Enquirer investigation has discovered Whitney has spent $6,300 a week on drugs – or $327,600 a year.

“Whitney is a dead woman walking! With the amount of drugs she’s buying, she won’t be able to live long. She’ll be dead in months,” her friend Marlon David told the Enquirer.

[From The National Enquirer, print edition]

The Enquirer goes on to detail Whitney’s various “health” problems that have hindered her tour, and then there’s this bitchy observation: “While most people expect a coke addict to be rail thin, Whitney is not. When she was photographed in London, Whitney looked bloated and sported a puffy face – conditions that sources believe are side effects of prescription drugs for her respiratory ailment that cause her to retain water and have a voracious appetite.” Just in case you confused Whitney’s weight gain with her being clean and hungry, I suppose. Just in case you had dreams of Whitney becoming the next Aretha Franklin, some big, beautiful woman who is all about the voice and the fabulous hats.

There’s also an interesting story about a drug buy in Denmark, allegedly witnessed by this Marlon David person, who is identified as a “party promoter”. According to David, in a very long-winded story, Whitney’s people called a Swiss drug dealer and offered him $6,000 to bring 200 grams of coke into Denmark so that Whitney could “party”. The dealer took the train – and it took 13 hours! Ugh, I’m sure there was a local dealer, Whit. The dealer, speaking to David, said that Whitney “was about 60 pounds overweight, her clothes were frayed, and she talked in a whisper.” I’d be talking in a whisper too, if I had to wait 13 hours for my dealer to arrive. But seriously this story is really sad. They just go on and on about all of the drugs Whitney is buying and using and how everyone thinks she’s going to die soon.