Jessica Biel’s translucent red gown & bedhead: stylish or idiotic?

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These are photos of a bedraggled-looking Jessica Biel in London on Tuesday, all part of the European promotional tour for The A-Team. Earlier this week, we saw Jessica’s horrible, one-armed puffy beige dress in Madrid, so I’m simply pleased that Jessica is A) Wearing a good color and B) Wearing something that actually shows off her figure in an interesting way, rather than wearing yet another bizarre, asymmetrical sack. As for this Giambattista Valli dress and the look as a whole… well, I must confess, I don’t hate it. I could see this in a fashion editorial, especially with the contrived bedhead hair that Jessica styled for the red carpet.

Now, I know what you’re going to say: “But Kaiser, you hate Jessica Biel! How can you not hate this look?” Well, first of all, I don’t really hate her, I just don’t think she’s all that and a bag of dicks, and secondly, I know that she is capable of the occasional good or great fashion moment. I’ve seen it before, but not that often. Is this fashion moment great? No. But it’s better than many of her fashion moments the past year. True, the dress seems a little too diaphanous, and everyone know knows that Jessica wears black Spanx (not to mention the red matches the carpet EXACTLY). I’m just saying that this is fashion forward and interesting, and Jessica would do well to have more moments like this. Oh, and it wouldn’t kill her to run a brush through that hair. For real.

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Jessica Biel in London on July 27, 2010. Credit: Bauer-Griffin & WENN.

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64 Responses to “Jessica Biel’s translucent red gown & bedhead: stylish or idiotic?”

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  1. Mairead says:

    Oh honey, no.

  2. Wench says:

    Personally? Gorgeous.

  3. CandyKay says:

    I like it.

  4. LOVE ANGELINA says:

    I kinda like that…I wonder if its supposed to be translucent though.

  5. Samigirl says:

    The hair is TERRIBLE. It looks frizzy and icky. The dress wouldn’t have been so bad if she had not obviously worn black underthings.

  6. bite me says:

    what did the poor girl do to her face… the dress is meh and the hair is different and i kinda like it.

  7. Emily says:

    I’d like it if it was opaque. I just don’ like the sheerness, the rest is good. Hate the hair though-that’s not bed head, that’s not-brushing-since-grunge-first-arrived head. Ugh.

  8. Katalina says:

    Wow. This is the best I’ve seen her look in a long time, maybe ever. And yes, the bedhead thing is weird, but it’s all the rage right now. Why, I have no idea.

  9. Michelle78 says:

    Very cute dress. I don’t think the problem is the dress…the problem is her.

  10. Dorothy says:

    It needs a slip! LOL Do people ever where those anymore??

  11. Crash2GO2 says:

    Love the gown. Hate the bed head.

  12. Risa says:

    like the dress. just not on her.

  13. Victoria says:

    @Dorothy
    Well IF she were wearing a slip the outline of her underwear wouldnt be so obvious. People would not be talking about it because they could not see it. Maybe this is what she wants?

    No I dont think people wear them anymore. 🙂

  14. Victoria says:

    I have a DUH question. Is her top lip the result of Botox injections?

  15. Fae says:

    Actually I like the little one piece under the dress. If she’d have worn a slip the horizontal line it showed at the bottom would’ve looked weird. The only other way to go would be to wear briefs under it and look like Caprice, which is always the exact opposite of what you should be trying to go for.

    Now all we need to find is a personality for JB and she’ll be ready to play with the real life boys and girls!

  16. Isabel says:

    All that and a bag of dicks…that phrase alone makes me certain that today will be a great day. Love you, Kaiser!

    Also, I think the dress is pretty funky – in a good way. Her hemorrhoid lips are nast, though.

  17. Toe says:

    In the third pic, she looks like a Vampire with her mouth half open. I love the dress. She has an awesome body. I wanna see the backside of it. The hair…meh.
    A slip? does that still exist? 🙂

  18. guesty says:

    like it.

  19. Exiled says:

    I dislike that she’s always a ‘mouth breather’

  20. Exiled says:

    How do you get 2 toes to flop out of your open toed shoes…

  21. Dorothy says:

    OMG I just noticed I said “where” instead of “wear” Sorry it is early!!!

  22. purelife says:

    shes ultra sexy for me. very toned!

  23. xxodettexx says:

    hate the hair

    but i actually like the dress, tho i do think that i would like it better on almost anyone else

  24. Mairead says:

    I still reckon this look is still hit-and-miss. Her hair was lovely the other day and this is just messy rather than artful. Love her eye makeup though.

    I like the dress. I love the colour and cut. I like the diaphanous material. I do question the use of a black one-piece. Normally I’d err on the side of skintone coloured spanx but that would still have been obvious. I think a red onepiece would have been better; it would have looked a deliberate part of the dress.

    Having said that, it does serve the function of distracting from her hair!

  25. Mrs.Darcy says:

    Don’t mind the dress so much, the high neck and length keeps the see through-ness from being too skanky imo. The hair – meh, not sure why anyone would aim for frizz, and the slug lips are just so over. Give the fillers a rest honey you are young and it’s not a good look.

  26. lem says:

    i like the “black spanx” look. can’t tell if that is on purpose, but i think it keeps the dress from looking trashy. if she had worn brief and a bra, it would look awful.

  27. purelife says:

    Guys, I love Jessica Biel. I want her body. BUT.. check out those toes in full length pic. looks like the gnome’s fingers has taken over. wth?!

    jess.. please wear rubber shoes next time!

  28. Doesn’t she give off that desperation like, I am wearing my hair this way because JT loves it when I am in bed all rumpled – I am wearing a dress millions will find sexy (not actually) because JT will pay more attention to me.
    The Outfit does show her figure and its lovely, I am torn on if it would have the same effect being less see through. The hair – NO! No girl, NO!

  29. Lisa Turtle says:

    This is a pretty gown, I do wish it wasn’t translucent on the bottom because seeing the black underpants is totally unnecessary and distracts from the better features of the gown.

    I hate the expressions Jessica is making in these photos (ESPECIALLY THE SECOND PHOTO) She looks like a doofus… Oh, and did someone just get her lips redone?

  30. CH says:

    she looks like a statue of a horse

  31. aenflex says:

    LOVE LOVE LOVE IT!

  32. Meanchick says:

    This woman is naturally beautiful. She is too young to wear this Goldie Hawn/Heather Locklear messy do’. Unacceptable unless there’s a GOOD reason she stepped out of the limo with the haystack look. Love the barely there makeup and the gear! (start ‘Put a Ring On It’ music) “Cause if you like it then you shoulda run a brush through it!”

  33. Embee says:

    She looks like she’s bombed out of her mind on coke.

  34. coup de grazia says:

    love it

  35. Green Is Good says:

    You think she knows everybody can see her underwear?

    The hair is a disaster area. Blech.

  36. Sara says:

    I think she looks like a sexy vampire. I think it works for her.

    I would have gone with nude body suit under that dress though. The black is kind of tacky.

  37. Kimi says:

    She looks beautiful but where’s Sharlto?!!

  38. denise says:

    lol@ the toes hanging out of her shoes.

  39. Eileen says:

    I don’t think she has a choice on the mouth breathing. It seems like she can’t close her lips!

  40. RHONYC says:

    man.

    she just don’t get it, huh?

    *eyeroll*

  41. Persistent Cat says:

    I think the dress is hideous. On a personal note, I hate that shade of red. But the dress is too long, the belt cuts her off at a weird angle so that, plus the top of the dress, makes her breasts look saggy. Plus the sheerness is hideous because of the underwear being seen.

    That girl is so clueless when it comes to dressing herself.

  42. Obvious says:

    with a red silk underdress it’s love it. but girl, bedhead can be cute, but the flyaways make it look budget and gross.

  43. Bunny says:

    I thought she was beautiful with natural makeup and hair in a ponytail……but when she started tweaking her face she lost that natural prettiness.

  44. angela says:

    I kind of love the dress. But not the hair. They took the bedhead thing too far.

  45. serena says:

    oh my god, she’s such a beautiful woman why doesn’t she do anything to her hair? duh.

  46. locagirl says:

    YUCK! Bad hair, awful dress, worst actress….

  47. Tia C says:

    Jessica Biel sure does wear some godawful shit. I honestly don’t think I’ve ever seen a photo of her and thought “Gee, that’s a pretty dress/outfit she’s wearing.” She is a beautiful woman but she is in DIRE need of a stylist!

  48. Ron says:

    If only she had listened to mother and worn her slip.

  49. bagladey says:

    Another case of trying too hard: That is not a hair style and why ruin the look of that beautiful dress with that stupid choice of a BLACK unitard-looking undergarment? Is that supposed to be fashion forward too?

  50. kate217 says:

    please just stop writing about her. she does not do anything and frankly i couldnt care less about her stupid clothes. this is not news.

  51. fugly says:

    she and jt are a perfect couple. both think they are god’s gift. huge egos.

  52. Kelly says:

    if your feet don’t fit in the shoes, don’t wear them. it’s horribly distracting from her pretty dress and her ‘i was just electrocuted’ hairstyle.

    i actually really like the dress, the hair is meh and the shoes are NO, girl, NO.

  53. Mistral says:

    Hmm…I really like it. It reminds me of those sheer animal-print Dolce and Gabbana dresses of the 90s where you could see the bras and low-cut panties through them. Every celeb was wearing ’em at premieres…

  54. Shawna says:

    She looks like she’s a superhero who has to go to a premiere, so just in case, she puts on her superwoman suit, then layers an easy-to-discard dress over it.

  55. sally says:

    Her nose looks way too nose-jobbed.

  56. Sally says:

    I know semitransparent/translucent stuff is in atm, but I don’t think this works for her. Better on someone else perhaps, or better as an opaque gown. Hair is awful. Is it me or does her face look (more) jacked in these pics?

  57. Vicky Corday says:

    She really needs to stop smoking crack while she’s getting dressed.

  58. Siren6 says:

    The silhouette and color are nice, but the see through aspect just seems desperate.

    It’s baffling to me how she can wear red and see-through and still be sort of limp and boring.

  59. Isa says:

    She looks like a ruffled bird.
    That dress would be her best if it wasn’t see through.

  60. Kelly says:

    Ha ha ha, she paid someone good money to look like she was dragged through a hedge backward in a chiffon curtain! That, and she’s flapping around after Justin Timberlake, so er hmm… maybe she really doesn’t know any better?

    Her appeal eludes me.

  61. MonicaBee says:

    I love her dress. I do not love her hair.

  62. LuckyLilGem says:

    She’s beautiful and sexy as the girl next door, what’s with the “beat you over the head with bed head” business? Yeesh…

  63. Anti-icon says:

    Gasp….she looks the best she’s ever looked. She is not a stylish person, almost always fails when attempting to dress. This looks youthful, and stylish and Damn, she is pretty (even if she knows it way toooooo much.)