*Kim and Paris in 2006, when they were friends

So maybe I don’t care so much about this story. Maybe I just think “whatever, two idiots fighting over stupid sh-t” when I first glanced this story about Kim Kardashian being an a–hole to Paris Hilton. I mean, doesn’t Paris deserve it? Wouldn’t you be an a–hole to Paris if you ever ran into her? And wouldn’t you also say something nasty to Kim too? I would probably say something to Kim about her catface. Because that’s the real reason I’m doing this story – to show Kim’s face from just a few years ago, back in 2006. Now, this was not Kim’s original face, according to the tabloids. To see her original face, you’d have to look at photos of her from, like, the 1990s. In these photos, she’s already had some work done, but she can still move her face, and she doesn’t look like a cat having a stroke.

Famously feuding ex-BFFs Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton usually can’t bear to be in the same VIP room. But they were both at Lavo Las Vegas’ two-year anniversary party Friday. Spies tell us the pair didn’t say a word to each other, but, “When Paris decided to do an impromptu performance of her song ‘Stars Are Blind,’ Kim looked bored to tears while Paris writhed on the couch,” a spy said.

As soon as she finished, Kim grabbed the mike and told the crowd, “Now let’s hear some real music.” Other stars included Anthony Mackie, David Spade, Molly Sims, band LMFAO with member Redfoo making out with Stephanie Pratt of “The Hills,” and label head Jimmy Iovine, who came to see son Jamie, a k a DJ Eye, do a set.

[From Page Six]

“Now let’s hear some real music” is pretty good. You know what’s even better? “Can I get a new microphone? This one has herpes.”

This is how Kim looks now:

And here’s some more of that long-gone old-school Kim:

Kim and Paris in 2006, credit: WENN.