Why do dudes love Kelly Brook so much?

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Other blogs, mostly written by horny man-boys (kisses to IDLYITW), have been covering every single movement this chick Kelly Brook makes. I barely know that much about her – she’s a “model” but not like a fashion model or a Victoria’s Secret model, she’s a “model” for men’s magazine and such. She seems to be famous for having a pretty face and an enormous rack. Which, honestly, you could say about Christina Hendricks too, although I happen to think Hendricks is a wonderful actress and she’s also on one of the best shows on television. Kelly Brook doesn’t really have that much going on besides being a “model”. Also: just be a mean, vicious, bitchy, JELLY H8R, is it just me or is Kelly kind of cross-eyed?

She just seems famous with men. Women don’t seem to know her or care. Maybe she’s more famous and well-known in the UK, where she’s from? She doesn’t have awesome style, she’s only dated a few “celebrities” – she was in a long-term relationship with Jason Statham, she dated Billy Zane, and she was rumored to be boning Matthew Morrisson, although I really think that was a beard situation. No one really A-list or super-familiar to American audiences. So why is she getting so much coverage here? Boobs?

Oh, she’s in that dumb-looking Piranha 3-D movie. The header photo is of Kelly last night at the premiere, looking like Vanna White in the ‘80s. She’s also in Playboy in the September issue. Here are some pics:

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Still not really getting it. Sure, she’s very pretty. But really, gentlemen? You’re working yourself into a lather for a brunette with a lovely rack? You know there are lots of brunettes with lovely racks, right?

18 August 2010 - Hollywood, California - Kelly Brook. Piranha 3D Los Angeles Premiere held at Mann's Chinese 6 Theatre. Photo Credit: Byron Purvis/AdMedia

Cast member and British actress Kelly Brook poses at the premiere of the movie Piranha 3D at the Mann's Chinese 6 theatre in Hollywood, California August 18, 2010. The movie opens in the U.S. on August 20.  REUTERS/Mario Anzuoni (UNITED STATES - Tags: ENTERTAINMENT)

Aug. 15, 2010 - Hollywood, California, U.S. - KELLY BROOK Attending The Breakthrough Of the Year Awards Held At The Pacific Design Center In West Hollywood, California On August 15, 2010. 2010..K65645DL. © Red Carpet Pictures

43243, LONDON, UNITED KINGDOM - Wednesday August 4 2010. Kelly Brook attracts a LOT of attention in London as she unveils her near-naked poster for Reebok EasyTone shoes. Having just completed a shoot for Playboy, the 30-year-old British model and actress has declared August to be her naked month! Photograph:  Jesal Parshotam, PacificCoastNews.com

Playboy photos courtesy of HuffPo. Header: Kelly on August 18, 2010. Credit: Bauer-Griffin.

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71 Responses to “Why do dudes love Kelly Brook so much?”

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  1. denise says:

    Dont know who she is , but wow. That dress and those red satin shoes, amazing.

  2. hstl1 says:

    She’s really pretty with a real body, don’t hate. And she dated Jason Statham so I should hate her but I don’t. Team Kelly.

  3. LindyLou says:

    Kaiser – I don’t get it either. To me she’s just meh. There are about a million other ladies out there who look just like that.

  4. Katie says:

    I think she’s very attractive but yeah, other pose half naked, I’m not aware of what she does.

  5. Sophie says:

    I’m English and I’m not really sure exactly what Kelly does, but everyone does know her over here. She’s modelled for a lot of big underwear brands in the UK, so she is pretty well known. I think she’s kind-of famous for being famous, but she seems quite nice in general, and she’s got a normal sort of figure, so I can’t hate on her.

    By the way – this girl is SO George Clooney’s type, right? How much do you bet that after Elisabetta goes, Kelly is the next in line?

  6. pookie says:

    I don’t think she is cross-eyed, I think her poor lids are fighting for survival under the weight of those ginormous fake lashes.

  7. Riley says:

    I dunno. In the words of Steven Tyler, “Dude looks like a lady.”

  8. canadianchick says:

    She’s cute, love the red shoes!

  9. YOYO99 says:

    Very hot. Not like most of the super skinny woman hollywood likes.

  10. Sarah says:

    “Why do dudes love Kelly Brook so much?”

    Answer, because dudes think with their penis’ and she has an insane body.

  11. Kittypants says:

    Well, I’m pretty certain that the jugs are a major draw. It’s definitely not her sparkling personality and wit that’s getting the men lathered up that’s for sure.

  12. Eileen says:

    Yeah I’ve been reading Superficial off and on and he posts her everyday. She’s pretty-but I’m not seeing what the obsessed postings are all about.

  13. fizXgirl3114 says:

    I might be wrong here but it could be that she’s hot and she shows her tatas to the public? I’m not sure there’s anything more complicated than that when it comes to men :-/

  14. coup de grazia says:

    IDLYITW scares me. I get it, it’s jokes, blah blah. It’s creepy.

    I am a pretty brunette with an “insane rack”. Can I make lots of money just by showing up places with some cleav hanging out? Cuz, if so, sign me up.

  15. Fluffy Kitten Tail says:

    She is much prettier than many over hyped people out there.

  16. Kelley says:

    Because she’s gorgeous and her rack is REAL, unlike most racks these days … I don’t think even Katy Perry’s rack is real … photographed at certain angles, you can see implant lines. Like Kim Kardashian – LIAR !!

  17. Kaiser says:

    LindyLou said it for me – yes, Kelly is pretty but there are millions of girls who look like her. She’s got a very cookie-cutter prettiness to me.

  18. Persistent Cat says:

    She does have an amazing body, plus a great face. Men don’t stop at just one woman to fantasize about. They can like Kelly and Christina at the same time. They’re not exlusive like that.

    I had to stop reading The Superficial and What Would Tyler Durden Do. The writers were funny but after awhile, I couldn’t take the endless bikini posts and misogyny.

  19. Lardy Chops says:

    She’s not the sharpest knife in the box and her TV career in the UK was short-lived because she could neither memorise a line nor read an autocue. No original thought has ever entered her head.

    So she’s resorted to getting her rack out. You’ve got to work with what you’ve got.

    (An inside track informant tells me she prefers ladies to men, by the way)

  20. Mairead says:

    I remember Kelly Brook from when she was a presenter on a very hit tv show on UK telly in the 90s called The Big Breakfast (a Bob Geldof vehicle which had the late Paula Yates doing fab interviews in a bed). She was a legendarily bad presenter, (mind you it also had Donna Air who asked The Corrs how they met) but I always thought that she seemed like such a sweetheart and was very watchable and warm.

    As an aside, when she crossed the Atlantic she seems to have left her make up skillz at home because she normally looks much better than that!

  21. Heaven-bound says:

    She looks a little bit like Shania Twain.. She is pretty.

  22. carrie says:

    she’s a good beard

  23. luke19 says:

    yeah she’s quite famous here, she is sweet and hot and usually does her make up better lol

  24. ligeia says:

    Q: why do men love kelly brook?
    A: she has huge tits and loves to get naked on camera
    rocket science, i know!

  25. Rita says:

    I just asked my husband to look at the headline and then I scrolled through the pics. He gave me a stare, a peck on the cheek and walked away shaking his head. Either the answer to your question was self explainatory or he was thinking “Kelly has nothing on you honey” (Yeah right). His nibbles are good for me and my vanity.

  26. K-MAC says:

    Like her, super sexy!

  27. gretchen says:

    agree, she doesn’t seem all that special…i’ve seen numerous posts/pics about her and never click, but then i’m not a guy LOL her body is great and natural is always nice 🙂 but i find her face kind of plain

  28. gretchen says:

    **oops** i guess i should explain what i mean by plain…not interesting to look at for any length of time, nothing to discover, oh hell i can’t describe very well what i mean

  29. Morgan says:

    @PersistentCat:

    My ‘regular’ sites used to be THe Superficial, Celebslam and IDLYITW (and this one). They alll used to be funny and report ACTUAL celebrities.

    This one is the only one I go to pretty much now.

  30. Juiceinla says:

    I have been wondering who the h-e-double-hockey sticks this chick was too- she’s – um-meh. In some of these photos she looks like Elisabeth Cana-lingus’ fraternal twin…

    Modeling workout clothes when flabby is a hypocracy I cannot abide by, so she loses those points.

    in sum- I don’t get it either

  31. funnygirl says:

    She has a great figure and can definitely turn on the glamour once shes groomed and all! But when she’s wearing no makeup, her face is rather plain:

    http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1293040/Kelly-Brook-gets-make-free-look-manages-turn-heads.html

    I can’t hate on her too much though because she makes the best of what she has. She knows she only has her looks for another few yrs so she’s doing a lot of men’s magazines to cash in now.

  32. The Bobster says:

    Why do dudes love Kelly Brook so much?

    Two words: Great nipples.

  33. guesty says:

    she is really pretty…kinda wholesome & vixenish all in one. just a guess.

  34. danielle says:

    Yeah, she’s attractive, but I don’t think she’s the hottest thing running around. I always wondered about the fascination too. Brit media always seems to talk about her like she’s an A list actress.

  35. Lisa S. says:

    HAHAHA is that a rhetorical question? I can’t imagine a heterosexual man NOT thinking this woman is hot. I am a straight woman and I think she is hot. (but these are not good pictures of her IMO). Being the anglophiliac that I am, I have known who she is for a while. She doesn’t come across as very bright though and there is an air of desperation about her.

  36. Kiska says:

    Never heard of her. I thought she was Kelly Le Brock but she would be much older nowl

  37. Dreamyvelvet says:

    Kelly was at her finest in the movie “Survival Island”. A cheesy flick with Kelly having everyone guessing if they were real and spectacular or fakes lol.

  38. Nudgie says:

    Haters 😛

    We love Kelly because she’s British, nice to look at, has a great NATURAL body, loves her Mum — but we mostly love her because she’s NOT LohanMomsenKardashianPerryHiltonCyrus!!!

  39. jdao says:

    I think she’s pretty. It’s so weird, I just saw her in “Survival Island” last night. That movie is hilariously bad.

  40. KJ says:

    I can’t believe this question warrants a full post. As a very hetero woman, I have to say – you pretty much answered your own question here, and if you somehow CAN’T see why dudes are obsessed with her, you’re either blind or a hater. The woman is HOT. She’s got huge, natural boobs, a great curvy figure, and gorgeous face and long, pretty hair. Oh, and she loves to show her tits. If I were a straight dude, uh, what’s not to love? If you think she’s MEH you’ve been too brainwashed by the airbrushing treatment most celebs get. She’s one of the few women that looks exactly how she is in her photoshoots – fucking awesome. I can only dream to look like her. She’s probably dumb as a rock, but that’s why she gets her tits out and doesn’t do neurosurgery.

  41. Jane says:

    I am in the UK and I have been following the career progression of Kelly Brook.

    I like her because she’s very nice to look at, and you don’t find a lot of naturally beautiful girls in England (classic consanguinity problem in an island). Also she is a nice girl. Not pretentious, well-behaved (never saw her drunk or behaving badly).

  42. DetRiotgirl says:

    Seriously? I’m a mostly straight female, and I think Kelly is super sexy. I totally understand what men see in her! She’s natural, she’s hot and she’s not blonde. I was going to say she’s different looking. But, truthfully, “not blonde” is more acurate. Anyway, I think she’s spectacular.

  43. SallyJay says:

    She’s really big here in the UK, and I have to say, understandably so – she’s beautiful, totally natural (her make-up usually looks wayyyy better) and is sweet, very personable, warm and extremely watchable (she has done a lot of presenting, other than the Big Breakfast gig previously mentioned) – she’s got a cute giggle. She normally rocks a 50’s vibe – prom dresses with pinched in waists. Men go crazy for her here, and rightly so. And I think she’s great too, go Kelly!

  44. gretchen says:

    thanks sallyjay…for someone who has not ever seen her before your description does make her seem very likable, cute and sexy 🙂

  45. Camille says:

    I think you answered your own question Kaiser lol.

  46. Liana says:

    I’m a pretty brunette with no rack. *sigh* I’ll never be famous except in thrash/goth circles as the chick who hung out with Peter Steele for a decade and never boned him.

    I think Kelly Brook is pretty and she seems harmless enough.

  47. Jessie says:

    Whatever the reason, let’s hear it for a woman getting headlines that has a healthy looking body. (And isn’t a fall-down public drunk/Paris Hilton-type….well, if we can trust reports!)

  48. gretchen says:

    @ Liana, the chick who hung out with Peter Steele for a decade
    now that is very cool, more info please 🙂

  49. Sudini says:

    THANK YOU for writing this piece = I’ve always wondered the same thing! Not that she isn’t a beautiful woman…but I’ve never understood the particular fervor men seem to reserve for her above so many others.

    I have to believe that at least part of it is exactly what you pointed out – she’s a “Men’s Magazine Model”. So, they’re basically being told by the magazines they read to freak out about her. (Again, not that she’s not beautiful…but the reaction seems a little disconnected somehow…)

  50. Elle says:

    I don’t know anything about her but she is gorgeous!

  51. Sudini says:

    Or maybe the disconnect is more about the fact that, for a woman who is that gorgeous and SO celebrated by men, you’d think she’d be more famous on this side of the pond by now.

  52. Adrien says:

    Dudes love her, women don’t get her, but they don’t hate her either. She’s also likeable and pretty harmless. I’ve seen prettier girls gracing British lad mags. Keeley Hazel is prettier than her, but she’s also kinda trashy.
    Some women that men love but girls (and gays) don’t get: Adriana Lima, Bar Rafaeli, Jessica Beil, Miranda Kerr.
    And some women that girls love but men don’t think about: Cameron Diaz, Audrey Hepburn, Sarah Jessica Parker and Jennifer Aniston.

  53. Vicky Cathay says:

    Wow, she’s had a lot of facial plastic surgery over the past year.

  54. Liana says:

    @ Liana, the chick who hung out with Peter Steele for a decade
    now that is very cool, more info please
    _____________

    Lived around the block from him, occasionally joined in his 3 am forays to the grocery store (dude was insane and so freaking funny), heard him belch out the words to “Iron Man” sitting on the stoop on a summer night, went to the movies once with him (never again, we almost got kicked out), always knew his ex Elizabeth was bad news (cheating bitch), and still occasionally cry because I miss him. But I never boned him!

  55. JY says:

    she is not definitely the most beautiful woman or the hottest woman ever. but I can see why guys love her. naturally pretty face and really hot body.. and she is not overexposed.

  56. Isa says:

    Silly Kaiser! Don’t you know that you can’t comment on stuff like this without being a H8ER!!!!

    That being said, I get it. She’s pretty, she’s toned but still looks soft. She looks sooo soft. I want to touch her hair. Lol. She seems like she can be “a lady on the street but a freak in the sheets.” Or however that song goes.

    You know who I don’t get? Ashley Greene! She reminds me of that mouse in a Disney movie. I can’t remember the name. It’s an old one. Plus her body is wide, especially her shoulders.

  57. Dhavy says:

    Even Megan Fox looks prettier than her

  58. RaraAvis says:

    Why? Because she has the best looking natural tits I have ever seen. Her breasts are what women think they’re getting when they get implants, but they’re not. What she has is a rare gift that cannot (yet) be duplicated on the table.

  59. Isa says:

    Btw, I do kinda get what you are saying. She doesn’t have much of a personality. If she had more of one like Sofia Vergara more women might be drawn to her.

    I also think that another reason why men like her (besides her beauty and rack) is that she looks friendly.
    She looks like someone they could actually go up and ask out without being laughed at. Turned down gently, yes. But laughed at, no. She looks kind.

  60. GatsbyGal says:

    Wow, her boobs are real! You never really see that anymore. Her face is kind of a dog, though. And yeah, her eyes are messed up.

  61. margo says:

    no clue who she is, but she is purtty

  62. Dizzybenny says:

    eeeeh…what was the question again?

  63. 5318008 says:

    This rant was written by a chick, right… ?

  64. Cel says:

    In the UK she is well known as an underwear model. She was hopeless as a tv presenter, but came across as fun and had a warmth to her.

    Every guy I know likes the look of her -pretty and no surgery.

  65. Clifton Chadwick says:

    Your question strikes me as a bit daft. She is very beautiful. Men, by their very nature, are attracted to beautifyl women. Her major sexual symbols are consistent with innate desires. While there are many lovely women out there – ScarJo to begin with, Kelly is exceptional. She has lovely eyes. How can you get lost on this??

  66. Boat says:

    Yeah, her eyes are weird. And I think she looks dumb.

  67. Anonymous says:

    It makes me feel like shit to see guys drooling all girls like this because I have absolutely no boobs, it sucks.. Honestly, I’m a cute girl, but guys just aren’t interested because I don’t have a “female body”.

  68. Liana says:

    Different strokes, anonymous. Some guys like women with curves and stuff, and others like women with more athletic bodies. The trick is finding the one who likes you for YOU.

  69. buenavissta says:

    Dear Anonymous, I can relate but don’t feel bad. I’ve got very small breasts and a husband who loves them for their shape and fit on my body. He prefers them to implants, which kinda surprised me when I brought it up. I’ve got other assets ( as I’m sure you do) and pretty isn’t even one of them!

    That said, this woman is very beautiful and I can understand the appeal.

  70. hey guys… thank you, but why the hell does this underwear seem to be green??

  71. Jack says:

    Wow. This article was obviously written by the writers “inner child” who is jealous of the popular kids and their good looks. Grow up sweetheart.