Earlier this morning, CB covered many of the details of the lawsuit Britney Spears’ former bodyguard has now filed against her. Amongst his claims – both in the lawsuit, and in his tell-all to British tabloids – was that Britney walked around naked all the time, trying to lure her bodyguards into bed, in between beating and poisoning her children. His allegations have been around for months, but he only filed suit yesterday. Anyway, Britney (or her lawyers) have just released a statement about the lawsuit:
This lawsuit is another unfortunate situation where someone is trying to take advantage of the Spears family and make a name for himself. The Department of Children and Family Services conducted a proper investigation surrounding Mr. Flores’ accusations and have closed the case without any further action. Ms. Spears and her attorneys have every expectation that this matter will be dismissed by the courts.
[From Britney Spears’ website]
Well… I don’t know. I like that the statement isn’t really strident, because after all, it is Britney and most of us will believe the worst about her. That being said, I think many of this dude’s allegations are probably flat-out untrue, or gross exaggerations of real events. Personally, I don’t believe that Britney is an “abusive” mother – in that I don’t think she’s hitting or poisoning her kids. I bet she probably gives them spankings when they‘re bad, probably because that’s the way she was raised, and that’s her only frame of reference. I also believe that Britney probably sexually harasses her bodyguards, and that she’s kind of gross in person, what with the rumors about her lack of hygiene and all. But basically, she’s just a young woman with mental problems, and what are you going to do?
I still get the chills when I remember that photo of her walking, holding a drink in one hand and one of her sons in her other arm and she tripped and you could see the baby start to tumble down head first and the bodyguard going for the save.
Maybe I just love to assume the worst about people, but I definitely believe she is more than capable of abusing her children, and probably has on more than one occasion.
I’m also from Louisiana, and that is how our parents raise us down here. If we don’t say “yes ma’am” or “no sir” or behave the way we are SUPPOSED to behave, we get whacked, or in my case, popped across the face. It isn’t abuse, it’s discipline. And I would LOVE somebody to tell me I can’t spank my child when he is being bad.
What a lame body guard. I miss those days of Tupac and Biggie, where bodyguards really knew how to keep their mouths shut and knew what would happen if they told a lie.
I don’t believe Brit hurt her boys. They were living with a Kevin a chunk of the time and when they are with her someone is around to help her with the boys. That conservatorship was the best thing for Brit. I don’t think she would hurt her sons.
I am not a Britney super fan, but it is just upsetting that you’ll beileve anything about why? because of her issues. I work with people with mental issues, many are being taken advantage of because of their problem.Sadly People will beileve the worst about her due to her breakdown. Please I know this is your blog but think before making any statement one way or the order, don’t crucify her without giving her a chance.
Sami: I’m from Louisiana too, and while I’ve been “disciplined” the same way you have, I just had to draw the line at the slap-in-the-face part. I think the face is off limits and I never hit my son like that. Many many people today don’t understand this as discipline, they see it as abuse but cultures are different everywhere. We learned respect and consequences, so where is the real harm?
I vote exaggeration. It’s sad, she obviously has mental health issues and I would think all that was discussed before he took the job, but I doubt it’s as bad as he’s saying.
If the stuff about her kids was true, he should be calling CPS, not suing her for money and talking about it to the press. That just makes me think he’s looking for cash and attention.
A little well deserved ass whoopin , is a parent’s right to bestow on their child when necessary.
🙂
… and I don’t believe that Brit is a child abuser.
Ugh…what is he obsessed with her? They investigated and closed the case. He needs to let it go, because he just looks like a jackass trying to make money or a name for himself.
Edit: @Samigirl I don’t think anything you could have done as a child would have warranted getting “popped in the face.”
I’m no Britney fan at all, I call bull s h i t on these allegations. Anyway if she’s under Dr’s care and Daddy’s in charge of her affairs. Wouldn’t she be incompetent to answer these charges if she’s incompetent to run her own business life. I think this guy’s just trying to set up an early retirement fund courtesy of the Spears.
They didn’t pay him off to shut the hell up. I think he was waiting for a cash payday, that’s why it took so long for him to file. I hope the Spears family stomps all over the money hungry bastard.
I agree GatsbyGal. I used to love Britney, and I still want her to get better, but I think she’s quite a dark person and I can imagine her having a very odd and messed up attitude towards her kids – even if she doesn’t mean any harm, or doesn’t believe she’s hurting them.
My sisters and I were raised like that too in south Texas, Samigirl. I didnt think it was abuse back then and now that Im older I dont see anything wrong with it. I grew up to be quiet in public, respectful of my elders and polite. And pretty kick-ass too.
@ Hatsumomo
Well said. Nowadays it is what these disrespectful, impolite, loud kids need.
@Sami, Hatsumomo, and Denise:
Hitting a child for whatever reason is abuse, straight-up. I don’t believe that it’s “discipline” at all. And yes, I count spanking as abuse. I don’t see how it matters whether you hit them in the face or on the bottom, you’re still striking your child.
Somehow ~*~magically~*~ I was a respectful and kind child who listened to my parents and did well in school, and my folks never raised a hand to me. Hitting a child is the last resort of a parent who has failed, and I will believe that until the day I die.
I am not a Britney fan but:
Why didn’t he file while he was working for Britney?
Britney had a very dark period, and during that she was ALWAYS half naked, in front of the world I would say.
She would not be the mother of the year, but now she seems so much better, and I honestly don’t believe she hurted her children,not on purpose. She had been dangerous because she was immature, and because of her breakdown.
What age kids are you all talking about because I have a 2 and 4yo and I think the 4yo is pretty good in public listens to me and doesn’t throw fits. He does talk a little loud but everyone tells me I have no inside voice so that is probably on me. My 2yo, she just hit the tantrum stage and I do have to shop ya know, so we have occasional fits in public. She is 2 and I’m not going to hit her no matter anyones opinion of her behavior.
If you are talking older children and teens then I’ve run into quite a few rude ones. And over my dead body will my kids behave like that.
As for the story, I call BS on the child abuse, why aren’t the rest of the staff coming forward if it is true.
@ GatsbyGal- my parents didn’t spank either and when my Grandpa died my parents had to go back east and we had to stay with friends for like 10 days. My mom said every family we stayed with said how well behaved we were. Some how without hitting they managed to instill respect and disipline in us.
I do not believe in striking your child for any reason. I was displined/beat as a youngster. It has left lasting impressions. Not good ones.
I’ve managed to raise a very well adjusted college junior without ever laying a hand on him.
I feel badly for all of you who think it’s ok.
Now I’m not saying I condone child abuse, hell no. But as a child, I got spanked as so did my siblings, and we grew up just fine. I have no trauma whatsoever from it. I’m a parent now, and I do not spank my kids, but if necessary I would probably whack them, yes I would.
Oh my god, she looks awesome in the first pic.
Now about the story-I totally believe she said she ws white trash, used the belt, but making her hcildren eat until they throw up? Not so much. lso, shellfish allergies are one of the most serious food allergies-one or both of them would have HAD to have been rushed to the hospital.
@ GatsbyGal and mmf
Everyone chooses for themselves how to best disipline their children, so don’t feel badly for me, my parents, my grandparents, or my great grandparents. We really don’t need your sympathy.
You were probably the kid in school that if I accidentally bumped into you’d go running to the teacher screaming I punched you.
The reason for me putting you down, you ask? Nobody posted anything about people who don’t spank their kids being any less of a parent, but YOU put yourself in an elitist position and look down on those who choose to. Your snobbery is to blame for the disrepair our public schools are in: teachers afraid to discipline students for fear of lawsuits. Congratulations! You’ve succeeded in boosting the crime rate in our youth.
My rant is over, I’ll let you go back to making signs for your next PETA rally.
I think this guy is an opportunist, plain and simple. If he really thought the boys were abused and/or cared, he would have done something at the time of the alleged incidents. Now on to the spanking debate. I was abused as a kid by one parent, and only rarely spanked by my other parent. I really don’t see anything wrong with a spanking. When I was a teenager, I got a few “pops” in the mouth, and honestly, at the time I needed them, and they definitely made me think twice before I got sassy with my mom again. To say that spanking is abuse is certainly someone’s right to think, but it is not abuse. When I was close fisted punched in the arms, legs, stomach, held against the wall by my throat, that was abuse. A spanking, when done right, is not abuse, it is discipline. I am less than a week from birthing my first child and I really don’t know whether I will spank or not though, will definitely use as a last resort only.
lol@ Mari
I applaud you.
I’m far from a failure as a parent and so are my parents, I luv them to death, as my kids do me.
I did’nt even realize the last line of Gatsby’s comment, since I did’nt read the whole thing. Parents who don’t spank their kids usually end up with Lindsay lohan on their hands. Anyways, everyone, has the freedom to raise their kids as they see fit. The End.
@ MikeyAngel
very well said.Good luck on becoming a parent.
🙂
@ Mari thank you!! ****claps****
so tired of a few people thinking they wrote the book on child rearing. Get over yourselves.
My parents “whooped” us, and I grew up to be a well-educated, law abiding individual. However, unlike most of the people in my shoes, I would never, never hit my children, and I think it’s disgusting that my parents and others do. Why take this “my parents hit me and I’m better for it” attitude? It hurt! It sucked! My parents are foreign and I have told them that the fact that they spanked and swatted us was extremely backwards. They have an excuse (somewhat) because they were foreign born, but I can’t believe that there are still people who think this is OK in the US. “Southern” is not an excuse to hit your kids.
I too was raised in the south, Georgia to be specific. My mother had no issue to slap me in the face when my mouth got smarter then it should. Granted I was 14 or 15 then. As a child I was spanked on the bottom. I have three children with a fourth being on the way, I spank my children on the bottom, but I never leave a mark it is just a slight tap or a smack on the hand. I see nothing wrong with spankings as long as it doesn’t go to an sbusive level.
@ Katija
What’s “disgusting” to me is people who try to correlate spanking your child with knocking someone’s teeth out.
“I can’t believe that there are still people who think this is OK in the US.”
Don’t dare put anyone who disciplines their child with a strong hand to the backside in the same category as someone who would seriously injure/endanger their kid.
That, to me, is disgusting.
For the sake of peace, I’m going to assume that we have different views of a “whooping”.
@solitary, I don’t slap my kid across the face. I was saying I was slapped by my parents. And I turned out just fine. I don’t smoke/do any kind of drugs, and I rarely drink…Just pointing out Southerners do discipline differently from the rest of the country.
And my son is for the most part an angel. Almost 3 and hasn’t gone through terrible 2’s yet. I believe it is because his father and I discipline. Spankings make the kids behave.
@ Mari
Actually, my parents were far more kind than I think most American parents are. I have repeatedly told parents to knock it off lest I call a cop when I saw them backhanding their kids in public. Even if it’s just a swat that won’t leave a bruise, the look of humiliation in the child’s eyes is enough to leave no doubt in my mind that ANY physical violence against a child is child abuse.
Why are you so gleeful about being able to hit your kid? Is that why you had the child? Specifically so you would have something to discipline?
@gatsby, popping your child on the tush is NOT abuse.
Before I was adopted, I was in an abusive home…and I could tell you stories that would make your hair curl…the things my biological parents did to me as an infant are NOTHING compared to how I discipline my child. Maybe if Paris Hilton, Lindsay Lohan, and some of these other people were spanked, they wouldn’t have turned out that way.
My son is a happy, healthy child, and I would welcome you into my home to show you that how I take care of him is NOT abuse.
I don’t know if you are a parent or not, but I’m willing to bet not. Lets see how you handle a child who wants to bite, color on the walls, or throws a fit because you won’t give him candy before dinner. I’m not saying I spank my child everyday. Maybe twice a week, but only if he deserves it, and normally after I have told him 2893274983724 times to STOP doing whatever he is doing that is bad. I don’t hit my child for no reason. That is abuse.
(And Mari – Before you tell me (as you said above) to go make signs for my PETA rally, please bear in mind that I’m more into protesting puppy mills. And also, that there are plenty of meat-eating conservatives who agree with my stance. Just FYI.)
@ Katija
You obviously don’t understand the proper use of “gleeful” as I in no way showed any of the sort…and I believe you missed the entire point of my post as you went crazy on the accusation front.
Great way to end a discussion. Good. Job.
Hoo boy, the old spanking debate has reared its ugly head yet again. Folks, no matter what side of the debate you are on, we all have to agree that we are NOT going to agree!! Some think it is perfectly acceptable to discipline children with a spank and some find that idea abhorrent. Neither side is going to convince the other that they are right. It seems pointless and kind of stupid to argue about it.
This case ought to get dismissed out of court since Child Services already investigated and found the claims without merit. That’s not to say some of these things didn’t happen, as they sound pretty believable to me, but the case ought to get thrown out. Eh, at the very least it should be interesting to follow.
@Gatsby Gal
For you to assume that someone has failed as a parent for simply spanking their child, is a completely ludicrous statement. A spanking nowhere near equates child abuse, that is complete exaggeration. I don’t know if you’re a parent or not, but if you are I’m sure you’ll be one of those parents on Maury, whose child beats them.
GatsbyGirl and Katija- it must really suck to be surrounded by such horrible people who are raising more people who will probably turn out horribly.
Maybe if your parents had whipped YOUR asses, you wouldn’t be such sanctimonius, insufferable blow-hards.
Now excuse me, I have to go bludgeon my child for spilling her milk.
@Mimix2- we can always hope!
@cletus
Hahahahahaha that is one fitting name.
{Waves to Cletus and his uncle/dad and cousin/sister}
You can absolutely spank your chilluns, make bathtub crank and feed the raccoon under your porch but that don’t make it right.
Spanking is lazy parenting. Far easier to use your hand than your head.
“Mimi2x:
September 9th, 2010 at 4:55 pm
@Gatsby Gal
For you to assume that someone has failed as a parent for simply spanking their child, is a completely ludicrous statement. A spanking nowhere near equates child abuse, that is complete exaggeration. I don’t know if you’re a parent or not, but if you are I’m sure you’ll be one of those parents on Maury, whose child beats them.”
Oh my god Im totally with you on this-a spank is certainly NOT abuse and the thing is that equating that with abuse minimizes the real cases where these poor kids are being beaten beaten into oblivion both physically and emotionally….
Britney Spears clearly has mental problems and actually I doubt she has that much unsupervised time with her kids-theres probably always someone else around…
Has she spanked them-yeah probably but I think come from a place where a spank across the ass is fine-its really impossible to reason with a 2 year old at times but she strikes me as a mostly disengaged parent…
Wow, the comments here are insane. I can’t believe people are actually almost prideful of hitting their own children. And I’M being demonized because I don’t believe in hitting kids! WTF, I feel like I’m taking crazy pills. I don’t care how your mom did it, or granny did it, or great-granny did it. That doesn’t make it right, you backwards bunch of weirdos.
@Gatsby, defending your actions does NOT equal being proud of them. The first few times I spanked my child, I cried right along with him. But spankings/discipline does NOT equal abuse. And it doesn’t make us backwoods or weird. It makes us humans trying to do the best we can to make sure our children aren’t as closed-minded and idiotic as YOU.
I think when it comes to parenting there are 2 lines that will be defined by the parent.
Firstly – what THEY concider to be bad behavior … is it not doing their homework / being rude to elders / spit gum or being violent or a bully. Each parent will have an opinion based on their own upbringing and values
Second – what the deem as acceptable ways to reprimand it. Verbally, calmly and with an explanation of consequence. Light taps, threats of more excessive punishments. Or a beating so bad they will never do anything like it again.
Every parent has the right to choose how they deal with situations, a lot of it will depend on how the child will react and how they usually are. The only person that can decide what is appropriate and what will work is the parent.
Until you have walked a mile in another parents shoes its hard to judge
@juicy. AMEN.
I find it really disturbing that her boyfriend is looking so gaunt.
Me thinks GatsbyGal could have used a few spankings in her lifetime, haahaaa! So judgemental when I bet she’s not even a parent herself. Perhaps an owner of a cat or two, maybe.
@ Samigirl
Post#40, I could’nt have ended it better myself.
🙂
I agree that not all spankings are abuse. However, my son is six and I have never had to spank him. We used timeouts which we don’t even need to use anymore because he is well behaved. I believe his good behavior comes from me and his father having a solid communication line with him. True, plenty of kids turn out ok that were spanked, but plenty of kids turn out ok that weren’t spanked. So why inflict pain when its not necessary?
GatsbyGal has a right to her opinion. I might not wholly agree with her, but I understand her point.
In fact, physical discipline of children is illegal where I live, and the spanking/smacking issue has been a hot topic of conversation. So yeah, here (legally, anyway) spanking does equal abuse.
@ Gatsby
I find your judgement rather hypocritical, especially since you said this:
GatsbyGal:
September 9th, 2010 at 11:43 am
Maybe I just love to assume the worst about people, but I definitely believe she is more than capable of abusing her children, and probably has on more than one occasion. ”
You go around “automatically assuming the worse in people” (and you love it???), yet you call us backward weirdos. Is this cynicism?
I agree that people can discipline their children however they please TO A POINT. The second you strike your child, it’s abuse, plain and simple. Just like it’s not illegal to argue and scream at a fellow human being, but if you hit them, that’s illegal. Just because you’re doing it to your own child shouldn’t make it excusable.
And I don’t think I’m being holier-than-thou, I think I’m being reasonable. I understand where people are coming from when they spank or otherwise physically discipline their kid. They’re frustrated, irritated, and don’t know what else to do. But I’m sorry, that’s not a good enough reason to strike your child in any capacity.
@Denise – Of course it’s cynicism. I have to live in a world where apparently hitting children is considered a-okay and I’m retarded for thinking otherwise. Being cynical is kind of my bag, if you haven’t noticed.
@juicyjakie
‘Second – what the deem as acceptable ways to reprimand it. Verbally, calmly and with an explanation of consequence. Light taps, threats of more excessive punishments. Or a beating so bad they will never do anything like it again.’
Are you serious? It is not a parents “right” to beat a child so bad they will never do anything like that again.
I grew up in the South and think that using that as an excuse to beat your kids is a cop out. My step dad hit me with leather belts hard and other things hard enough to leave bruises up and down my body. The last time he did it was in public and thank goodness someone called 911.
I turned out fine DESPITE the abuse I went through not because of it. I would never dream of hitting my kids like that. No child EVER deserves that.
I do think there is a difference between swatting a behind (although I won’t even do that) and being abusive.
However there is never a reason so hit a child in the face or hit them with an object. Just b/c someone turns out doesn’t make abuse okay, it just means they were able to overcome it. My brother was not and continued the cycle of abuse. His infant daughter paid the price for that cycle.
Re: spanking v not spanking – depends on the parents, depends on the kid(s).
I personally think a slap across the backside of a naughty toddler doesn’t do any harm when it’s your own kid and if you’re comfortable disciplining this way. But I can see how bad this would look to a stranger / passerby / observer in public who only sees this one snapshot of your parenting and passes judgement.
Gatsby, it is actually against the law to “scream at a fellow human being”-it is disturbing the peace, along with emotional abuse. And I think if I screamed at my 3 year old…screamed at him, like I get so pissed off I SCREAM at my child…well that would be worse to him, hurt his heart more, and prob. scar him worse than a little pat on his bottom. I think SCREAMING at a child is over board, but if that is how you want to take care of your future children (God Forbid you become a parent, bc you obviously have no clue how to parent) than so be it. Lets see whose child ends up in therapy, and whose child is well rounded and just a good kid.
I don’t swat my son’s bottom (which is covered by a pullup) because I’m “irritated” and “frustrated”…I do it because it gets his attention. Me telling him 1928320981 times before hand to STOP doing what he is doing, and explaining to him why it is wrong, or dangerous, or what have you doesn’t work, or get his attention. So yes, if I have to swat my kid bc he is trying to stick my keys he grabbed off the table into the electrical socket, well it’s gonna happen…
Nobody is calling you retarded. We are saying you are closed minded. Stop talking about parenting when you obviously AREN’T one.
Gatsby- no one is “demonizing” you but your arrogance is rather off-putting. It’s quite egotistical to think that *your* parenting style is the only way to raise a child.
You have your way, I have mine. I am in no way a failed parent or a backwards weirdo, merely a part of the 88% of the rest of the world that shares mine.
Sally- yes, 24 (I think) European countries have banned corporal punishment, which has a very “inclusive” definition and includes extremely physically abusive forms of punishment. It guess is easier to ban it all together than have gray areas?
Would you do it in public, in front of a stranger? If not, why?
Would you do it to an adult?
Does it bother you that children who are spanked tend to be more violent: http://www.nydailynews.com/lifestyle/health/2009/09/17/2009-09-17_spanking_in_early_childhood_leads_to_violent_behavior__new_study.html
Oh don’t bother with GatsbyGal. She is a bottomless bag of contradictions. She doesn’t know which end of herself is up.
*just another freakin’ backwards weirdo*
Denise do you actually think “people who don’t spank their kids usually end up with a Lyndsay Lohan on their hands”??? Now, I’m used to your illogical comments, but this takes the cake. Think about that statement. Really. You’re saying parents who don’t use corporal punishment have drug addicted, alcoholic, spoiled children.
BTW, “turning out fine” is not a justification of how one has been parented. I know tons of people, and I bet all of you do to, who suffered horrible upbringings, yet “turned out fine”. For every person who was spanked but “turned out fine”, there’s one or more who weren’t and they “turned out fine” as well. It’s just not a good way to make that argument. IMO, It’s about matching your personal philosophy with your child raising. I don’t have an opinion either way in terms of spanking. I think the most important thing is consistency so that punishment, in whatever form, is done with some thought process behind it so it’s not erratic and reactionary.
It is illegal to “pop” anyone in the face, let alone children. If “popping” your child in the face is not child abuse, than I don’t know what is.
And I always thought an “ass-whooping” was when one person beat another one up. If you beat up your child, you are a child abuser. And an asshole.
I was raised in Africa.I had a loving Mom that will give everything to make her children happy. However, as a kid, I got in trouble and got wipped and smacked with anything close by. Alot of kids get spanked. I am an adult, don’t smoke, drink or do drugs. I never for once felt abused, I lost my mom couple of years ago and I still say she was the best mom anyone could ever wish for. I am from a culture that stress dicipline and love.
@Crash2GO2 – Which I suppose is all part of being 24. But don’t even get me started on some of the comments that you’ve made. I know I’ve shook my head and wondered “WTF” at things you’ve said plenty of times.
All I know is that I’m rooting for Brittney. I think it’s sad she has mental problems and everyone just seems to be waiting for her to fall. Why can’t we just root for her instead?? Go Brittney go!!! I think it would be hard to escape Hollywood intact and unscathed and I’m sure she is doing her best. I spanked my kids sparingly and they are fine. I was spanked sparingly as a kid and I turned out fne. Maybe if more people spanked their kids we wouldn’t have so much flippin youth crime!! Seriously!! Don’t even get me started on this topic….
A little well deserved ass whoopin , is a parent’s right to bestow on their child when necessary.
Sorry, don’t agree.
Yes, there are times when you are overwhelmed (yesterday in London for me, with my 3 and 6 year old, the youngest who was grabbing at the Picassos, big no no…)
I think a slap, whoop, whatever, stuns them and what does it teach them?
It’s manipulation and it teaches your child that when all else fails, give a little pain.
There are other ways to get your point across rather than causing your child some physical pain, even if only momentarily.
Dont’ beleive in that kind of discipline and never will.
Where I live spanking is also illegal. When my kids were young I found it very difficult not to hit them when they played up(I was spanked as a child). However, because it is illegal here I had to take a deep breath and a step back and use my head to find an alternate form of punishment. I have raised two well behaved, polite kids who never feel the need to resort to violence against another person.
This whole thing has gotten really out of hand. I got sucked into it, too- my last comment was pulled. I will (try to) say this, though: I love how all the “smart people” can’t seem to tell the difference between a smack on the butt and a beating. Debating or arguing with some of you people is aan exercise in futility, precisely BECAUSE some of you people obviously do eat crazy pills. Apparently you buy ’em by the ton and eat ’em all day long. It’s the only excuse I can think of for the likes of you. “Lazy parenting”…. well, at least no one can accuse YOU o fbeing lazy, what with being the measuring stick for all humanity like you are. It must be exhausting to judge others so furiously.
Maybe you should buy some of my bathtub crank- you know, for energy. I’ll be sure and send it out after I’m done with all my illicit inter-family breeding and feeding the racoon under my porch. Also… Passerby… what’s wrong with racoons? What are you, a bigot?
I may be back-wood or whatever, but at least I ain’t no whining sissy.
And for the record, Gatsby, I didn’t call you retarded, because that is wrong and hurtful to retarded people. We had this discussion on Celebitchy. Jeez.
Trillion
If you have no opinion on the matter, than why bother commenting at all?
You’re calling my comments or thinking illogical yet you compare spanking to corporal punishment? lol.
A slap on the ass, is far from corporal punishment. That’s an extreeeeme term, for extremely sensitive people.
@memyself thank you i could not have said it better.
i mean everyone as a person has the right to not be harmed, and there is a great story that tells all on why you should NOT even smack your kids a little.
its from astrid lindgren you can find it here: www neverhitachild.org/never1.html just a short story but it says so much
kids need discipline not spanking but it seems this is often mistaken
Here ya go Denise:
“Corporal punishment is the deliberate infliction of pain as retribution for an offence, or for the purpose of disciplining or reforming a wrongdoer, or to deter attitudes or behaviour deemed unacceptable. The term usually refers to methodically striking the offender with an implement, whether in judicial, domestic, or educational settings.”
How’s your logic now?
@ Trillion
I know what corporal punishment means. I still don’t believe that a spanking with a hand, constitutes corporal punishment. I’m speaking of a spanking done with a hand,not an excessive spanking and definitely not with a weapon, yikes. My logic is still intact. I don’t buy into these double- think terms.
No your logic is not intact at all. You said that people who don’t spank their children usually end up with a drug/alcohol addicted and spoiled child a la Lohan. Explain the logic in this absurd statement. It is one of the silliest assumptions I’ve read. Let’s see if you can defend your hyperbole with some reason.
If Britney spanked her child with a belt, that would be, by definition, corporal punishment. (who said anything about a weapon?) I wouldn’t believe this guy, however, without some kind of back-up.
@Denise – Yes, it’s obvious you don’t buy into anything to do with thinking. That’d be too hard on you, I suppose. Which is why you believe spanking is acceptable.
What I don’t understand is WHY would anyone WANT to raise their hand to their own child? And for those who will argue, “I didn’t want to spank my kid,” then why did you? You gave into your baser emotions and figured, hey, a smack on the butt has to be easier than actually coming up with a better way to teach your child not to misbehave.
I’m with @MeMyself all the way. Physical punishment only teaches a child to behave with the threat of pain. That’s just not right.
Some people just don’t want to be bothered with thinking. And if you follow certain people’s comments on various topics here, there’s definitely a pattern…
i believe every kids have different characters, some children are easy to handle, you talk to them and they listen. but some are difficult and you need to do more action/way to make them listen.
i think every parents have their own right how to raise their kids as long as you know the limit. and i am sure most parents do what they have to do because of love.
all parents want their kids to grow good, only with different way.
i dont have kids…but my mom raised me with discipline (spanking, etc). i grow up fine. i dont hold grudge to her, i know she love me n i love her. because of her way of bring me up that i never do drugs, never do criminals, respect to the elders n i full of love towards others.
but yes i do admire parents that can raise their kids without any form of discipline like spanking and their kids grow up wonderful also.
but please dont judge harsh to other who choice to discipline their kids with their own way. it is not easy to raise children. THUMB UP for ALL MOMMIES!!!!
@ Trillion
Since u require so much explanation, I’ll at least try.
You know those kids that you see at supermarkets or toystores, you know the ones, that are throwing insane tantrums. Well their parents with their soft voices and their adult logic , which does’nt work on small children by the way. Well I’m sure Lilo was one of those. Well noone knows for sure, but in essence the jab at her was a joke.
FYI a belt is a weapon
So I get your logic, if we don’t have the same opinion on a topic than somehow my logic is flawed.
@ GatsbyGal
It seems that you may still be sore about being called out on this thread, so I’ll tread lightly.
Wisdom comes through experience,which is obviously something you’re lacking on the topic. I can respect that you are against spanking. What I don’t respect is your logic on parents who decide to spank. You cannot judge these people, because you are not a parent, and you have never been in their shoes. I’m sure the parents (on this thread at least) do not abuse their children. I’m sure they don’t go around spanking their children everyday. Say what you will, but I myself, do not believe a spanking constitutes abuse, so sue me.
@Denise – Why can’t I judge them? Because I don’t have their “experience”? Fuck that, I can judge plenty. You don’t have to be a chef to say whether or not a certain dish is good or not; you don’t have to be a painter to know a piece of art looks like crap; you don’t have to be a trained singer to tell someone’s voice is falling flat.
GatsbyGal:
i disagree with you… no we cant judge others specially if we dont know them and their situation. dont judge other by the cover.
we can disagree by their action but no judging.
i am a teacher, kindergarten and elementary school teacher. i dont have kids but i dealt with many children with my 11 years of experience. really gatsbygal…it is not easy to be a parent or dealt with them.
it totally different seeing others with having one yourself. yes, you dont have to be a chef to know the food good or not BUT for parenting…you need to experience it first
I don’t think spankings are abuse.
Hitting, popping, or tapping a kid in the face is not spanking. It’s abuse.
Spanking didn’t work with my daughter after she hit 3, so I stopped using it. Spankings in our home were administered to keep hands off the oven door and fingers away from electric sockets at other people’s homes and situations like running from mommy toward a street…when she was in danger, she got spankings for misbehavior.
For the annoying crap, I used a squirt bottle. I’m not kidding. She went through a tantrum phase that would knock Job to his knees. She was loud and it was constant. It was humiliating, frustrating, and absolutely a nightmare to parent.
I got a squirt bottle and set it to mist. I carried it in my purse. Whenever she would screw up her face and throw her head back to scream after being told “no,” I’d mist her face.
Some of you probably think THAT is abusive, too…but it wasn’t. She’s fine. And it worked. It taught her that there were consequences to pitching fits, and that prompted her language development.
Dealing with, “but I WANT that, Mommy,” is so much easier and productive than dealing with blood-curdling screams in the shampoo aisle because you won’t let a toddler lick the cap of a hairspray bottle. or pull bleach into the cart.
People who don’t have children should really just acknowledge that they don’t have any idea what they’re talkign about and refrain from being judgmental. People who do have children should understand that not everyone’s momma does it like your momma did…and that’s okay.