It’s tearing up my heart… that Lou Pearlman, the sexy hunk of man meat who created ‘N Sync, the Backstreet Boys, and the New Kids on the Block has been sentenced to 25 torturous years in prison for stealing more than $300 million from a variety of investors, including his friends, family, business associates, and the elderly. He even bilked Justin Timberlake out of some well-deserved cash. And Chris Kirkpatrick. And we know he needs every dollar he can get.

Legendary music mogul Lou Pearlman, who created the boy bands Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync, was sentenced Wednesday to 25 years in prison for stealing more than $300 million from investors. But Federal Judge G. Kendall Sharp, in Orlando, Fla., said he would reduce the jail time by one month for every $1 million Pearlman returned to the investors.

Pearlman bilked thousands of people out of millions of dollars in an investment scam that went on for decades, authorities said. His victims included “his family, his close friends and people in their 70s and 80s who have lost their life savings,” according to Sharp.

Pearlman pleaded guilty in March to two counts of conspiracy, money laundering and using false statements in a bankruptcy proceeding. Pearlman, 53, had sought to delay the sentencing so he could launch his latest musical creation, the European pop band US5, in the United States and Asia.

During his music career, he also managed the bands LFO, Take 5 and O-Town. Both Backstreet Boys and ‘N Sync previously filed suits against Pearlman because they believed they were not receiving a fair share of the bands’ profits. Those suits were settled out of court.

[From People]

Because what better reason to postpone sending a criminal to prison than launching a new boy band? Sure, sometimes people get a little grace period for some traumatic surgery or the death of a family member. But what could possibly be more important than launching the next LFO?

Ordinarily I would say that getting to buy yourself a month less of prison isn’t fair. I think a lot of celebrities would have gratefully ponied up $1 million to spend 30 days less in the slammer. That means that if Pearlman somehow returned all the money he stole, he wouldn’t serve a single day. But considering some of his previously reported predilections, something tells me Lou will make his time in prison work for him.