I hate ridiculous lawsuits more than I hate anything else in the world. Or until I think of something new to hate tomorrow. A woman is suing Victoria’s Secret for an eye injury she sustained while putting on a thong. She says one of the little metal decorative pieces – or a fastener used to attach it – scratched her cornea. She’s unclear how it happened – I’m assuming there was some sort of ricocheting involved.

A Los Angeles woman is suing the lingerie-producing giant Victoria’s Secret over a thong gone wrong. Fifty-two-year-old Macrida Patterson, who works in parking enforcement for the Los Angeles Department of Transportation, says she suffered a scratched cornea after either a pendant or a metal fastener snapped off a pair of panties and struck her in the eye.

“It does seem sort of unbelievable at first,” said Patterson’s attorney, Jason Buccat. But, he said, his client’s injuries will “affect her for the rest of her life.”

Tammy Roberts Myers, a Victoria’s Secret spokeswoman, said the company had not seen the lawsuit and had no comment.

[From ABC News]

Sometimes these embarrassing “how could anyone possibly do that?” type injuries sound dumb but actually have merit. When I was in school one of the lawyers from the infamous McDonald’s hot coffee lawsuit spoke to my law class.

When he explained the whole thing – from the cup’s flawed design to the coffee that was routinely kept hotter than boiling – you saw that the case really was legitimate. And then he showed us pictures of the woman’s injuries, which still make me sick to this day. The boiling water left wounds in her thighs that were inches deep. So I always try to keep that in mind when the media latches onto some seemingly stupid lawsuit.

That said, this sure sounds like bullshit. I think that if nothing else, this lady needs to get a new lawyer. He comes off as an idiot, repeating the same trite phrases over and over again. I really wanted to smack him and hold a pillow over his head after about 20 seconds. And his whole “We just want to make sure our client is taken care of” thing – dude you’re suing over a thong injury. Don’t act like this is just about your client’s health and well-being. You’re here for cash and 10 seconds of fame. And now you’ll forever be known as the thong lawyer. Well played.