Yesterday we heard a former caregiver to Farrah on Teen Mom’s 22 month-old daughter, Sophia, allege that the girl was being neglected and was worryingly behind on major milestones, like walking and talking. I’ve watched season two of Teen Mom and remember a couple instances when Farrah clearly made some dumb, potentially damaging mistakes with her baby. Many of you pointed out even more stupid moves that Farah made that put Sophia in danger, namely leaving her unattended in the sink (where Sophia turned on the hot water and burned herself) and leaving the baby in the hallway of her apartment building in her car seat. Radar Online spoke to Farrah about the allegations from Sophia’s babysitter, and she says that it’s not true that Sophia can’t walk or talk and that she’s saying phrases and has been walking for nine months. Farrah also denies that Sophia is being neglected at all, and claims that the caregiver is motivated by money.
RadarOnline.com: Why do you feel your caretaker would tell stories like this?
Farrah: To use Sophia to make money from that magazine. It’s really sad that somebody would use a child like this and do this to her when Sophia’s just a baby.
RadarOnline.com: The childcare worker claims you left Sophia with her and on occasions, forgot her? Is that true?
Farrah: I don’t know how I would EVER forget my daughter – I love her and she’s all I think about.
RadarOnline.com: According to the childcare worker, Sophia’s development seems worryingly slow and she couldn’t walk. Can she?
Farrah: Sophia has been walking- she’s been walking for 9 months. That includes when Brittney was taking care of her.
RadarOnline.com: When’s the last time this childcare worker watched Sophia?
Farrah: Brittney has not babysat for Sophia for five months…
RadarOnline.com: How is Sophia? Does she play with other kids, or what were her most recent words?
Farrah: Sophia is doing awesome – she’s healthy and really good – a cute little toddler now. She says lots of sentences, like “I love you” all the time. She loves watching Barney. She plays with the kids in the park on her “park day” all the time. The other day she was with us while we were walking my sister’s dog and she was sharing the dog with all of the kids on the playground. Sophia is very nice child; she knows her manners and she’s very friendly with other kids.
RadarOnline.com: How difficult is it to be away from your child as a working mom?
Farrah: It’s VERY difficult. The first time I had to drop Sophia off at my grandparents’ house, I cried. It tears you apart. I’m always very concerned and looking out for her, also, I just want to say that she always has clean clothes, food and has everything she needs.
RadarOnline.com: Does your mom help now that you are working more?
Farrah: My mom is more involved in Sophia’s life now that I don’t have to work with DHS for childcare. My mom and my grandma help with Sophia a tremendous amount, they’re so supportive.
RadarOnline.com: Do you use a babysitter/daycare right now?
Farrah: The only time I use a babysitter right now is when my mom or grandmother can’t watch Sophia, when I’m at school or working I have to use a babysitter for a few hours sometimes. I have responsibilities and I’m a single parent.
[From Radar Online]
Farrah is kind of clueless and can be very abrasive and snotty. She’s dealing with a lot and I get the sense that she’s doing the best she can. She’s not the worst mom and she’s far from the best, but she’s not mean or deliberately neglectful. I’m glad that Sophia is ok though and that she’s a happy and healthy little girl.
In related news, Farrah recently won a custody battle with the mother of Sophia’s father, who died in a car accident before his daughter was born. Sophia’s paternal grandmother was seeking grandparent visitation rights, which she was denied due to not having any relationship with the girl. Perhaps in retaliation, the woman told Life & Style that Farrah is “a heartless spoiled brat and doesn’t deserve Sophia.” No wonder Farrah doesn’t want Sophia to have a relationship with that woman.
Farrah, the “care-giver,” and anyone else who gives interviews to the tabs are motivated by money. Please don’t insult my intelligence.
At least Farrah is able to drop Sophia off with family members to provide her childcare. She needs to start counting her blessings and appreciate what she has.
My parents sold our house when my son was 3 weeks old (yes, I was a teen mom); I was told there was no Bellaluna’s room at the new house; the only childcare I received from my parents was when I took my college entrance exams. Beyond that, I traded childcare with other single mothers, had a room-mate (who was also a single mother), and provided child-care for money as I was able. I also went through a nasty court battle with the man who almost killed me on many occasions to keep him away from our son, and received almost no support. (It speaks volumes that said son is now 20 and child support is still owed.) I didn’t care – I wanted my son & I away from my abuser no matter the cost.
STOP WHINING AND RAISE YOUR CHILD. These girls aren’t the first teenage mothers, nor will they be the last; and they have a hell of a lot more support (financial and otherwise) than most. Get over yourselves.
glad she responded. team farrah.
I’m sorry but you only have to watch one episode of that show to see that Farrash had issues and is a really shitty mother.
Lots of crappy moms love their children, or at least say they do, but they’re still crappy moms like Farrah.
Farrah should never have had a child, she’s not a good mother at all.
She should have found someone to care for the baby.
Um you can see that Farrash is a “heartless spoiled brat” by watching that show.
SOooo not team farrah. I’ve known a few “moms” like her in school and Farrah is far worse than any of them, b/c at least they grew up.
team grandma!
BTW The forgot part the baby sitter said could have easily been farrah forgetting what time to pick her up, which I won’t snap at her about because as a former baby sitter when i was 14. That did happen. Mom’s liked to sneak an extra hour . . .
but she’s still a crappy mom
Poor girl. It’s a hard job being a mammy at any age, and as any mother knows there is a tremendous amount of guilt that comes with a baby. You constantly question whether you are good enough. You question if you should be home, or out earning a living. Are you spending enough time with them, are you providing enough..etc etc…
If you are lucky you have a supportive partner to reassure you and support you, but this girl seem to have nobody helping her, and those she has asked for help are pointing fingers and criticising her. How is this of any benefit to Farrah or Sophia??
No baby comes with a manual and its a hard and sometimes thankless job and only she can know if she is doing all she can.
Us mothers should stick up for each other.
Farrah is my second unfavorite, my first is Amber. Funny it used to be the other way around. However, I do think Farrah has taken some necessary steps to becoming a better parent. I’m glad she’s in therapy and hopefully that will help a lot. She clearly sees that she has issues and wants to make changes now. I don’t know if her “I’m a great mommy” act now is real or for the cameras. Who knows with reality tv anymore.
i remember reading what to expect and it talked about grandparent/parent relationships and it said something like “in this cold world we live in, why would you want to keep ur child away from someone that wants to love them?” even if the baby’s dad’s mom is not perfect she obviously wanted to be in the childs life… i think that is so cruel and selfish of farrah to keep sophia away from her grandma esp. w/ these circumstances… lil sophia is all that woman has left of her son… so sad
I remember when teen pregnancy was all about Spike on Degrassi.
I’ve always felt Farrah is pretty self centred and not maternal at all, but she does seem to be trying. As an adopted child whose mother was 15 when I was born, I’m just grateful she gave me up to be raised in a stable home. This isn’t a knock on those who were teen moms, it’s just watching these shows are a “could have been” moment for me.
@ Bellaluna–
Keep that judgment for child support alive, girl! I know a lady, her children are in their 20’s, and her ex-husband has owed something like $20,000 in child support since the last one was 18. Well, his mom just died, and all the money HE was going to get is now going to go to my friend. People that don’t pay child support make me so mad! And absentee parents who show back up and expect all the rights tick me off, too!
@Megan it isn’t always that simple. People can really do a number on kids.
I wonder if those licensed childcare providers will face any backlash for their interview. I would think that a child’s records are confidential.
@ manda –
Yes, my judgement is still in effect for him. The most disgusting thing about the whole mess (not including the abuse I suffered) was him standing up in court when the judge asked if paternity had been established, and him saying he was “proud to say this child is his”; then when the judge asked if support had been established (it hadn’t) he asked “What’s the state minimum?” WHAT A BASTARD!
And at the time, the minimum was $125/month.
Thank you, Roma, for your honesty. More pregnant teens need to do what your birth mother (and Caitlynn & Tyler) did. Kudos to her, your parents, and you. God bless.
Did anyone watch the episode when the DNA tests come in? I swear Farrah seemed kind of relieved that Sophia was proven to be Derek’s kid. I know some people think she looks just like Derek, but I think she looks quite a bit like Farrah, and I think there was a question in her mind, however small.
I don’t think Farrah is the worst, but she’s way too careless.
Applause to you, Bellaluna!!!! As far as the “teen moms” go – the $60,000.00 that they’re reportedly being paid can’t be overlooked. These young women have a lot more than most teen moms do and still they’re being portrayed as “struggling”. I do think it’s sad that society has seemingly become so nonchallant about teen pregnancies – I wonder if it will ever reverse it’s self?
per yesterday’s post, maybe I am wrong then about Sophia having a developmental disability — so retract. ; -)
I honestly think that she is not the worst mom on that show. She is motivated and has her own place. Anytime I have seen her on the show, she seemed to be loving.
Raise your hand if you were or are a perfect parent.
Hint: My hand is not raised.
I was 24 when I had my baby girl and here are the following dumb things I did:
1. accidentally smashed her hand in the car seat thingie and didn’t even realize it until we got where we were going (she hardly whimpered, but there was a damn dent in her hand when I unlatched it!)
2. accidentally smashed her pinkie in the latch of the swingie thing when she was two weeks old
3. Put her in the center of a full-sized bed when she could sit up but not crawl, turned my back and bam, she had gone from the center of the bed to the floor
4. thought it would be better to give her those liquid vitamins while she was SLEEPING and she turned blue and I picked her up and got her breathing again (dumbest one out of all of them)
5. ran out of diapers and had to wrap her in a BATH TOWEL (at 10 months old, mind you) and take her to the store that way (no one home to watch her at the time)
6. when she was two, she started crying in the middle of the night, but I figured she would just go back to sleep. She did, but the next morning, I saw that she had a nosebleed and there was blood everywhere. I was horrified that I didn’t at least CHECK on her.
I was a grown woman, married, had a college degree, was a high school teacher.
My point is, none of those things are any better or worse than what we’ve seen with Farrah and she was 16 or 17 when she had her baby. EVERY new parent makes stupid-ass mistakes, if you say you haven’t, you’re lying.
The thing is, no one was around documenting my mess ups on film and then airing it for all the world to comment on.
She’s no better or worse than the average mom and has actually come a long way since the baby was born.
I’m not the founding member of the Farrah Fan Club, she has more growing up to do, but really, the mistakes she has made have been common new dumb parent mistakes.
Teen pregnancy won’t stop until we realize that children are not responsible enough to be sexually active. We have to remind them to do their homework and yet think that telling them to wear a condom will make them do it?
It’s not a morality thing – it’s a maturity thing.
I’m not saying I never made mistakes – every new parent has; if they say they haven’t, they’re lying. However, there are certain “common sense” things you do not do:
Do NOT leave the baby unattended in the bath; in the car; on the changing table; on ANYTHING said child can fall off of, set on fire, etc…
My issue is this: If you’re grown enough to have unprotected sex without thought to the consequence, don’t have the audacity to act surprised when you end up pregnant! And don’t whine about how you’re still a teenager – AGE DOESN’T MATTER WHEN YOU’RE A MOTHER, HONEY. YOU GAVE UP EVERYTHING WHEN YOU DECIDED TO KEEP YOUR BABY, SO SHUT UP AND RAISE IT RIGHT OR ADOPT IT OUT TO SOMEONE WHO CAN.
NO FURTHER DISCUSSION REQUIRED.
Team Farrah!
I really disliked Farrah during the first season of 16 And Preggers, but in the latest episodes of Teen Mom she seems to have really, really grown into being a young mom. She is well on her way to being an ADULT.
So all the people who say she’s a terrible mother and whines, I think you are being kind of mean and judgemental. Yeah, she was bratty as a teenager and had a kid. But guess what? She adapted and had to grow up quickly.
I think she’s doing a good job. Keep your chin up girl!
@ LBees – Please see my above comment.
This caregiver shouldn’t be watching anyones children! So what if she did have some disability? Is it the caregivers job to “out” this information? My son has multiple developmental disabilities & believe me it has nothing to do with parenting! At 3, he is nonverbal & in a wheelchair, legally blind & cannot crawl or sit unassisted. He saw all the best doctors, had every therapy known to man (still gets therapy), surgeries and more but nothing can ‘fix’ him into somebody he is not. It took years of going through the stages of grief ( including denial) to come to terms with it. Although he has never, ever stayed with a caregiver, I would have been livid if someone had spoken publicly about his developmental issues and attempted to attribute blame to it! What a horrible human being! Anyone caring for children should know better!
Anastasia, thank you!!! Finally someone has admitted to not being perfect and making so stupid mistakes with their children! You know we all do it too!! I have a two year old and I can say I pretty much did all those things you did. One time I put her in her carseat, forgot to buckle her up and didnt realise it until we were at our destination! Gaaaah! And I was 27 years old then! Its not easy having your life displayed via snippets of reality tv and I think all the ‘holier than thou’s’ need to realise that.
By the way, my child is now 16 and survived me just fine, despite my stupid mistakes. 🙂 Like any parent, I learned and got better.
“Do NOT leave the baby unattended in the bath; in the car; on the changing table; on ANYTHING said child can fall off of, set on fire, etc…”
Grown women (and men) leave babies/toddlers on beds, couches, etc ALL the time. I can’t blame that on age b/c I know to many moms in their late 20s and 30s who have done this and had a baby/toddler fall.
I have a weird fear of falling, so I never left any of my kids on anything.
@Anastasia and @Bored I agree with you both 100%. No mother, or father, is perfect. We are human. We make mistakes. I wish more parents told expectant parents that mistakes will be made. It’s not helpful to judge and criticise. What would help is encouragement and understanding that sometimes parenthood is overwhelming. I can’t believe how many people are picking on a girl who was (practically) widowed at 17 with a baby on the way!!!
I wouldn’t have been able to handle that, and I had my children when I was 24 and 26….
Why isn’t she working to co-parent with “that woman” who, if I read this right, is the CHILD’S grandmother, and also the mother of the DEAD father. This is tragic. (Does the dead father have any rights? I mean, this baby could heal these warring factions.)
Reading this all I can say is W.T.F.
Seriously, how careless can you be with your own child(ren)?!?!
Thanks to Anastasia for posting her “mother-of-the-year” moments on here.
It’s so easy to judge but it’s hard to be a parent, even when everything is going for you (money, partner, family support etc). My hubby and I (sorta) joke that we should start a therapy fund for our girls instead of paying college.
“Why isn’t she working to co-parent with “that woman” who, if I read this right, is the CHILD’S grandmother, and also the mother of the DEAD father.”
Why would she ‘co-parent’ with a grandmother? Farrah is the parent and the one responsible for Sophia.
Besides would you want your child around someone who bad mouthes you to magazines?
“Stormie, who originally told HollywoodLife.com that she would only give an interview for money . . . . “
Anastasia, you just made my day. I would love to see a website devoted to mistakes our kids survived. Thanks for your honesty, it’s what makes you a great mom!
I just want to add:
Team bellaluna!
Ok, I will address the comments about “new parent ignorance” (for lack of a more polite term):
My oldest son (who is now 20) managed to obtain my keys and shove said keys (my mailbox and laundry room key) into an outlet and blow out the power to the entire apartment building. Thank God he was “grounded.” Shit happens. It doesn’t mean you’re a bad mother, it just means you need to anticipate the un-anticipatable. And sometimes you just can’t.
NEVER UNDER-ESTIMATE THE DESTRUCTIVE FORCE/ABILITY OF YOUR CHILD. YOU WILL ALWAYS BE SURPRISED AT THEIR ABILITIES. There is no lesson more valuable than this. TRUST.
So you guys don’t think I’m a totally judgemental bitch, my oldest actually survived these moments:
Pulling out the kitchen drawers in stair-step succession so he could climb on the refrigerator (a 24.6 cuft fridge, no less) and get into all the things in the cabinet above that he shouldn’t have, including the my acrylic liquid (I did my own nails);
Plugging my mailbox key in one opening and the the laundry room key in the other opening of an electric outlet and knocking out the power to an entire apartment building (try explaining that one to the manager & the power company);
Managing to have such a close relationship with hazardous materials on a regular basis that the Poison Control Centre greeted me by name when I called their 800 number.
NEVER TAKE ANYTHING FOR GRANTED WHEN IT COMES TO YOUR CHILD. THEY ARE SMART, CREATIVE, AND A BABY’S BRAIN IS THE GREATEST SUPER-COMPUTER IN EXISTENCE. RESPECT IT.
About the grandmother: you don’t know what the relationship’s like, or what the grandmother is like.
I have a friend who chooses not to have a relationship with her mother. People tell her she’s awful and heartless all the time, that her mother is older and she’ll regret it when she’s gone. My friend is too polite and too private to tell them this, but the reason she doesn’t talk to her mother is that her mother is miserably abusive and has serious mental issues – not only did she allow her brother to molest my friend as a toddler/young kid, she also threatened her with a knife more than once in her teenage years.
I’m not saying that that’s the case with the grandmother; obviously, that’s a pretty extreme example. I’m just saying, not every family member is a warm, loving positive influence just by virtue of being related by blood.
Aww, thanks buenavissta! My Mom actually sent me an hysterical e-mail a while back about all the things kids born before the 90’s “survived” and it was so true! If I can find it, I’ll post it. It’s definitely worth the read!
I’d love to see that too bella, we survived all sorts of things before we had kids lol
@ Chickadees –
It went on about how we didn’t have car seats; didn’t use seat belts; climbed over the front & back seats of cars; survived without video games, computers, cell phones; child-safety locks, outlet covers, and TVs that were heavy enough to crush us if they feel over; actually WENT TO OUR FRIENDS’ HOMES to see if they wanted to PLAY OUTSIDE; stayed out until dark without having to text message our parents, etc… I’ll ask my Mom to re-send so I can post it.
What’s the deal with crapping all over the paternal grandmother in the article. Why shouldn’t she have a relationship with what could potentially be her only grandchild? Why wouldn’t she badmouth Farrah if she’s blocking that?
@Anastasia- We have many a picture of me wrapped in T-shirts in lieu of diapers with my dad (that never seemed to happen to my mom…).
The best story ever is my mom’s when she was doing the single parent thing before she met my dad: My brother was around two and he got an angel-food cake pan stuck on his head. Mom vaselined it, greased it, tried everything. Finally she had to call the fire department. They managed to cut it off with no casualties besides the pan. The real kicked was about a year later; she had moved to another house in the same town, and my brother (this is a constant theme in his childhood) stuck his head between the railings of the stairs. My mom finally called the fire department, and when she apologized, they said “Don’t worry, this is nothing; we had to cut off an angel-food cake pan from a kid’s head once.”
I have a lot of issues re:shitty parenting, which is why I have actively made the choice to not have children of my own at this point in time.
I don’t watch the show, but I’m not impressed with Farrah’s “response” to the state-funded caregivers. As a nanny and an elementary school candidate (for “urban”/underfunded public schools) – people who look after other people’s children aren’t in it for the money. We’re in it because we believe in giving every child a chance at a happy life.
So I don’t know how a girl who earns $60K a season for squirting out an infant gets off accusing an overworked, underpaid state babysitter of trying to make money off her child (*cough*hypocrite*cough*), but I do know that Farrah comes off as a very, very ugly person.
And she ought to be ashamed of denying her child’s paternal grandparents visitation rights. Such an ugly, petty, spiteful little girl.
Ps – And I don’t care if Farrah has a shitty mother, it doesn’t excuse her petty behavior. All the more reason to wait to have children – see my comment re:shitty parenting.
haha anistasia! my daughter was about 1 1/2 yrs and shoved a broken piece of glass up her nose! i was 30 and she was m,y second baby! we arent perfect, ive never seen the show but it would piss mee off if someone said malicious things on my parenting, besides if you feel they are in such danger call cps
When a child was sick. I was cleaning the bathroom. Left TV show Jerry Springer. It wasn’t on long but glad he didn’t pick up anything on the show. The child was only two at the time. My boyfriend drop his daughter cause he was tossing her in the air. She was fine and only cried a little.
@I am Legend,
as a grown woman, the grandmother would not be badmouthing Farrah if she ever hoped to have a relationship with her grandchild. She should probably realize that nothing productive would ever come from further alienating herself from the one person in control of her granddaughter’s life.
My parents never babysat and I never lived with them after I was 17.
That’s just the way it was. It wasn’t cruel, many grandparents do not want to raise more children after their own have grown. Some enjoy it, some don’t.
I always thought it was odd when I knew a young adult that lived with their parents.
P.S. My stepfather had to pay his back childsupport off with monthly payments from his social security. That could not be hidden (he claimed self-employment) most of his life and did not report any income.
@Leah! all of these stories made me smile, but yours made me laugh out loud! To add mine – both me and my son’s dad (we aren’t together now) used to have long hair and occasionally it would get wrapped around my son’s toes. One time, it happened to where I could not get it off, so I had to take him to the ER. After a hour of waiting (and bitching at the receptionist, asking if my son’s toe would be amputated because we had waited so long), we got called back. The doctor had to take a blade and cut the strand of hair to get it off, and the entire time, my 3 month old is screaming, to where a security guard who was walking around looked in the room we were in. The security guard told me he could relate, it’s happened to him with his kids, but apparently, hair could also get wrapped around little boys penises!!
BTW my son is now 8 and as normal as can be expected, with me as his mom. :p
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I have 3 kids, and I am 30. I NEVER left any of my kids alone in a sink, high above a tile floor, with water running and the hot water knob right within reach with no safety on it, while I went into another room and sat down on a computer. And I had my first kid at 18. I did once leave my first daughter in the tub while I walked to that hallway, 9 feet away, completely in full sight of her the entire time, to get a towel out of the linen closet. The biggest mistake I have made so far is when my son was 2 and slid out of my bed onto the carpet in the middle of the night while we were both sound asleep. He was fine, just surprised, and I was horrified that he slipped out from under the bed rail that I had on the bed for safety.