Do you ever have a moment of sheer, unadulterated joy when you see a completely new photo of a celebrity you enjoy? That’s what just happened to me when I gazed upon these new photos of Angelina Jolie at today’s Berlin premiere of The Tourist. The bitch is wearing a black velvet dress… with built-in gloves. FABULOUS BITCH. Angelina is TOTALLY ‘80s. It’s ridiculous. All of her style references are from watching Dynasty as a tween, and she’s never moved on from that point. God, I love her. Brad doesn’t look too bad, though – he actually looks really hot, in my opinion. Do you think he had some fun with those gloves before they left for the red carpet? I do. Mm… velvet dong tug. Maybe that’s why Angelina’s hair looks like she’s just spent the past hour getting nailed, you know?
By the way, when asked about her Golden Globe nomination for Best Actress in a Comedy/Musical, La Jolie said that the acknowledgment was an honor and: “we were laughing because it’s the first time that I’ve been in the comedic category so it’s new for me.”
And here’s Johnny. I don’t hate the suit or anything, but I have no idea what that thing is hanging down on his side. Is that his dong sheath? Pleasepleaseplease let it be a dong sheath. As for Johnny and his two GG noms, he said that he is “very touched by the double nomination.”
More photos.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
UGH! That mess is total FUG.
Wow! they are really working it! now that the movie got such bad reviews. Even the Pitt is al smiley, smiley to the fans. Some executive must have got them out there to do some heavy promoting, to at least break even. LOL
Ang’s dress is fab – minus the glove bits…
Why did Johnny gain so much weight? Everyone is losing their hotness 🙁
Wow. What is up with the wonky eye she’s got going on? Other than that, she looks flawless.
JD has a hanky hanging down his leg. It appears to be his latest favorite fashion accessory.
Gah! Angelina looks like a wax figure. O.O;
The close up of her face makes her look absolutely radiant.
I really like the velvet dress. Including the attached gloves. I feel like I should hate it, but I don’t and I’m really scared by that. She looks fiieeerrrcceee. And I will excuse the hair because it’s total sex hair. And if you’re bumping uglies with Brad Pitt, you’d better have sex hair 24/7.
She looks like she’s on something. Medicated. stoned. completely vacant.
I. Can’t. Stop. Laughing at the too-big built in gloves!
I guess Angelina does have a sense of humour. How else do you explain the hair?
I’m not loving the dress, the whole dynasty style is crap, but I do appreciate that it’s nicely fitted.
Glad to see Brad enjoying the sleazy guido look again.
Johnny looks like he was thrown in someone’s laundry hamper before being photographed.
Her make-up looks really good, but why do I feel as though they look like they got dressed to go to two different events? She looks glamorous and he looks unkept. At least he’s not wearing that God awful wrinkled black coat that he’s been seen in lately, but he still looks sloppy to me. The hair, the coat with the sleeves that are too long….I like him much better in a nicely tailored suit with shorter hair. He needs to put a little more effort into his appearance.
@Kiki: Everyone is losing their hotness 🙁
yes everyone, everyday, sad, well not really, such is life; hot then cold and stiff 🙁
I can’t stop laughing at all the stupid comments
Hate that leather jacket on Brad, but he does look handsome in the face.
I love it when they look like they just rolled out of bed onto the red carpet!! HOT!!! the look on her face is hilarious!! They both look like they polished off a bottle of wine on the car ride over!!
Does she have green eyes, or blue eyes, or gray eyes???
Not my most favourite Jolie look. But her face is flawless, as always. Brad looks hot, yum 😀 .
Johnny Depp, well what can you say? 😀
omg. i can’t stop looking at the gloves.
she looks great (though I think I’d like the dress more if it were a bit longer and had a more fitted skirt/bottom), but he looks…um…well, terrible. agree that they look like they dressed for two different events. and I don’t care for that slicked-back-hair look.
also agree that they look like they put away a bottle of wine (or two!) before they showed up. and if I had to do the same thing over and over to promote a movie, I’d probably get a little saucy before I went, too.
That face! She’s in my top ten most beautiful in hollywood just because of that face. I’ll even give the wonk eye & waxy complection a pass here.
That dress though. Completely fug.
Does Johnny Depp own a comb??
The white circles is either ghost orbs or snow, and I’m going to say snow and she’s trippin to be wearing that and no coat when it’s COLD out like that,lol. It’s weird, I can’t decide if she looks pretty or kinda weird with that dress on, I think the gloves bother me too,lol. Her face is beautiful, but her hair is kinda messy, maybe it was windy. She is either exhausted or medicated (like people said) :/ I hope just tired. What the heck is Johnny wearing? lol His suit would look cool without the rag hanging out his pocket and thing around his neck, silly goose,lol.
Look at all the orbs flying around this couple! ok it’s snow and she does look cold.
Still: I don’t like the dress and I don’t like the hair. It seems to me her hair is more of a mess with every premiere.
Pitt looks alright I guess, trying to make the most of another wacky premiere.
Depp looks weird and uncomfortable, like he just wants to get out of there and get loaded with Keith Richards.
All that said: no, I could never even remotely pull off a dress like that or any other dress for that matter, but I’m feeling bitchy tonight and I have to spill.
I think She looks beautiful and like she is freezing, hence the glazed look. He looks sexy but way more casual then she does. Now I love Depp as does every female in my family (right lil sis) but lord his outfits are like Brad’s beard hideous.
She is looking stunning lately.
Kaiser this post made me Lol.
Face is beautiful but so not a fan of the built in gloves or the velvet
That dress is f’n stupid. Brad’s leather trench or wtf is f’n stupid. Everything abut Johnny is f’n stupid.
just…UGH.
Those gloves really look nuts! It’s hard to believe an article of clothing can manage to take you down a few notches on the sanity scale but alas!
Awwwww I think Brad looks really good. I am LIVING for the dress with the built in gloves. I have never seen anything like that. Its totally vintage and couture, I love it. Not to mention Angie looks beyond radiant and poised. That velvet dong tug thing grossed me out but I warmed up to it. Totally hawt. Also I didn’t notice but I guess this is the first time Angie has been nominated in the comedic category. Cool.
Johnny looks great but thats like the same scarf he was wearing earlier. If his dong was on his hip I would be weirded out.
*hums batman theme from the 70’s…looks for fingernails on end of gloves*
Her makeup is amazing!Her skin is flawless as always.I love this woman,she’s a goddess!No other woman can wear things she wears and still look fabulous!I can’t even imagine what a showstopper she’d be if she tried to dress well.
I’m not crazy about Brad’s new hair but he’s looking good.He brought sexy back.
As for Johnny,I never understood how women find him hot and sexy.He has horrible taste in clothes and always looks like he needs a shower.His suit is very nice but not the way he wore it.
Jolie dream came true – they grew old together…
I pray that she got fecked so good that her hair couldn’t recover because if it was actually styled that way then I demand her hair person be fired!
I would really love to know what kind of face creme she uses and what foundation-makeup she wears.She looks great 24/7.
She has the best skin in Hollywood.
I’m sad to see that Brads beautiful eyes are dissapearing while he ages.His eyelids are drooping.
Disclaimer: Loons and Hens, keep it in your pants. I am not the enemy.
I’m sorry but I gave her a compliment on her appearance in the earlier post, but my limits are being tested with this look.
Those gloves. Does anyone remember a short-lived cartoon called Home Movies? Her hands look like that (and that’s not a compliment).
Observe: http://buyordontbuy.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/08/hmbrenguirk.jpg
I guess I’m not as caught up as others, because this same mess of hair would be called a drunken catastrophe on any other actress out there. She looks like she got picked up off of the floor, not rolled outta bed.
Brad’s hair is schlacked and coiff’d with in an inch…
Sorry, but no. Guess I’ll go to the “jellis8htr” corner…I hear they serve fruity drinks. It’s cold here, and I need that.
wow it’s snowing. she must be freezing. Her face, body, skin all look amazing. Only she could pull off a bad hair and dress day and still looks 100 times better than the average person. I’m not a brangieloonie but there is no denying that face of hers is flawless.
“I think She looks beautiful and like she is freezing, hence the glazed look.”
Usually when you are cold you look tense and miserable. She looks like she is stoned and ready to fall over she is so relaxed. lol
I really like the velvet dress. Including the attached gloves. I feel like I should hate it, but I don’t and I’m really scared by that.
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Hahaahaha!
and number 28 thats hilarious too!
Old school Hollywood – Angelina is stunningly beautiful, most gorgeous face ever!
A couple of added pounds and she would be over perfect!
She is sooooooooooo stoned ahhaha
They don’t look very put together, but what a stunning couple, and I am not a big fan of theirs
I love the dress, but how would you go to the toilet in it?
huge fan. i love her winter wonderland wardrobe she’s been sporting from white angora/cashmere to the velvet built in gloves. love the dynasty vibe. brad’s looking good and yes, they totally look like they rolled out of bed to get there.
johnny has seen better days in his life!
he was better when he was thin and with his fabolous cheek bones before botox!
only a little time ago he was so hot and cool…now he’s a so puffy face!
I like the dress but not the gloves.
@Sigh “Sorry, but no. Guess I’ll go to the “jellis8htr” corner…I hear they serve fruity drinks. It’s cold here, and I need that.”
I’m crying over here. That’s hilarious!
she’s totally hot.
johnny is just skeevy.
@Emily “I love the dress, but how would you go to the toilet in it?”
That’s what her ASSistant is for.
I swear I thought that hanky was a pair of underwear!!!!
Angie’s velvet hands, ugh!
Ok, I am really not a fan of hers but that bitch could rally wear a sack of potatoes, smear shit on her face and shave her head into a mohak and still look god dam fabulous….
Maybe she was tired of the comments about her hands & arms so she decided “Screw em! I’ll wear sleeves with gloves attached!” So they’re gleeves? Or sloves?
dang, angie! you got nerve- and it’s working for you! brad is fine as usual. johnny, not so much…
I f***ing hate those gloves but
@P.M. that is an awesome conclusion! You have to be right, she’s wearing gleeves to distract the arm and hand critics, and they know who they are with their vein obsessed rants.
Now they’ll have to focus on her dress and her *cough*bad* hair. I’ll take a margarita from the fruity corner please.
AJ’s dress made me laugh like a demented*, this dress is hilarious.
At last Johnny is dressed in a decent way! Well, almost… Love him, though.
*don’t jump on me for saying ‘demented’, I absolutely don’t want to be/sound mean.
WOW!! There is some serious hotness in those Brange pics. They are smoldering!
They both look ridiculous. She had her face squirted full of all kinds of things this week.
All three look a mess and Angie appears to be sooo stoned.
It looks like Brad is wearing the same outfit from the U.S. premiere and probably the last 10 times I have seen him! Doesn’t this bitch do his laundry between the half a dozen kids(joke)? Why does he keep squinting his eyes? Does he think it’s sexy or is he just stoned all the time? I heard he likes weed. Johnny has become guy-liner addicted, I guess they wouldn’t let him wear it in the movie to detract from Hagelina’s eyes,since it looks like that is all the movie is about.
I just remembered my theory Brad thinks he is Clark Gable re-incarnated.
The hair is pretty . Both brad and Jolie. I don’t know what people are talking about? It’s just slicked back. Brad shouldve worn an all black suit. I like what Angie has going on I think she looks radiant. E! Online is dissing Tourist mom cause Brangelina…told them to suck balls. ….lol.
Johnny is a hottie. Shot in the dark but I don’t think any of these 3 love these premieres. They just do it to get it over with and enjoy their partners/coworkers. They’ve been doing this stuff since forever.
Is Brad joking with that getup or is he going through some kind of midlife crisis?
She…..is…..fierce!!! I luv the dress the hair everything she is not cut from a mold and i luv that she does her own thing and she owns up to it all and doesnt live her life based on who approves and who doesnt because lets face ot you cant plz everyone and whats the point of living YOUR life if your living for someone else?! And man brad looks delicious!! I like his lil beard and the all black this couple are unique and i luv seeing them!! And johnny is well….johnny hes effortlessly handome and i love that he does and dresses as he does as well and needs no approval!! TeamBrangie and TeamJdepp
Why does her head always looks so HUGE?
Ugh Brad looks squinty and doofusy as usual. Angie’s dress is cool though…very unique.
She looks like Elvira. Whats up with the hair…wind tunnel?
Is her forehead growing? Seriously.
I love the dress, except I expected to see a whip at the end of one glove.
I love the velvet Onesie,……….or should that be Glovesie. What the hell kinda dress is that?!
Seriously, Angie…..GET a better STYLIST!!!
She more often than not, disappoints on the red carpet. She always seems to be a little “Laurence Welk” in the dress/gown department….and lately hair too, with the pouffy bangs ,cinderella updos, and heavy eye makeup. Ughhh!
Her makeup looks good though…
I like the way Johnny Depp is dressed. Brad looks too slick, not in a good way either.
I totally echo Kaiser’s *squee*. Angelina looks FABULOUS. I don’t know what some of you are looking at, cause the bitch looks HAWT! So does Brad.
I don’t think Johnny looks too bad either. I like his green accents on a grey suit. Although I will admit Colin Farrell does it better. Maybe it’s just too much hair/goatee going on.
I’m thinking she just looks that way cause Brad’s pinching her butt again! Or she’s mentally reliving them banging on the way over. Gotta get some time in while the kids are away!
DD, I am ROTFL!!!!! 🙂
Hmmm: I love the dress, except I expected to see a whip at the end of one glove.
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You know what? I can totally see Angie playing Catwoman if they ever do another remake.
Im sorry to the brangaloonies, but I don’t find her at all attractive, her hair is a mess and she looks high as a kite…
That is one of the strangest dresses I’ve ever seen.
Not a velvet fan, and the gloves are just bizarre, but at least it’s not a sack.
Jolie said, “Wow, I can’t believe I was nominated for a comedy. i didn’t know the movie was a comedy”.
Welcome to Aniston’s world, Jolie!
100% FUG. Straight up FUG, all the way around. Fire your stylist, Jolie.
Pitt appears to be stoned out of his mind and Jolie, well, not real sure what she is on. Something for sure!
micah: ‘love the velvet onesie’ bahahahahaha!
they look ridiculous! you have to take yourself waaay to seriously to walk out of the house wearing that without laughing
Haha, I can’t imagine what that thing looked like on the rack.
I wonder if she bought this one and the white housecoat gown in a set designed by Donna Martin.
I actually like the dress and she and Brad together any where is always a win win win IMHO..
They just make a very attractive couple. They have IT. and whether you like them or not the WOW thing is always with them. When they are at any event it is just them and no one else..
Love the shoes too.. she has been working them.. I like the hair, but I would like to see it a bit shorter. But I like them and enjoy seeing them together.
The woman is breathtaking, I bet they had a quickie in the limo.
Pot and ‘ludes in the same photo. Amazing. Juxtaposition for sure…
brad loves and fcuks angie so she can wear a sack and he is happy
what a bad dress, love the dress where did Jolie get it! why don’t they make this dress so that regular people can afford it.
The comments are why i love this website, LMAO !
all three look nice, stylish, love them! Good role models, good hearts, good people,good actors. Love them!
The Tourist wasn’t starring Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie so I don’t get why Brad is even there. Depp should be more prominent in all this promotional stuff.
Death warmed over. That’s all.
WAY too many posts of them! Tone it down.
Tired of seeing Brad’s pill popping face.
Heh, they do looked stoned. Probably smoked a joint on the drive.
Damn Angie loving the dress and gloves. And brad aint that bad either 😉 LOVE THEM.
she is whacked on something….I love her, love that dress with the gloves!
I’m a fan of both of them but something here isn’t right… Look at her eyes, at the pupils. Girlfriend is on some good sh*t and I doubt it’s whats in Brads’ pants. Brad doesn’t seem happy at all and they don’t seem like they’re giving off the “Haha I’m getting some of this tonight” vibes like they used to.
I don’t think any of them look good here, in fact, they all look strange to me. Crash is right, angie looks toasted.
It was snowing in Berlin with temps in the teens. Angelina is out there without a wrap in a Versace, Brad looks great, and Johnny looks good like Johnny always does. You need to see other pics from the premiere, everyone was in big thick coats and hats and warm furs. Angelina is COLD, later puts a matching wrap to the dress on, she still manages to smile and do interviews. Brad is there supporting her as he always does. They are in love and it shows, no need for any boosting substances as some want so badly to believe. Happiness is contagious.
All these couples breaking up the last few days and Angelina and Brad are going strong. That’s life.
now i don’t wanna p-off ‘love angelina’…but contrast this pic with the ‘mr. & mrs. smith’ premiere and these too are looking
super worn-out! http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,1069785,00.html
like they have both cancelled the hotness out of each other. 😮
please, oh, please don’t do voodoo on me l.a.
lol 🙂
I always feel bad for Johnny Depp in these types of publicity things. I know how this is going to sound, but he’s more into the ‘art’ aspect of acting, and always seems SO uncomfortable with the ‘glamorous’ scene.
Thus he dresses like a complete douche and hides behind a HAT, SCARF, GLASSES, long stringy hair and a beard. He even puts that damned hanky down on his legs to detract attention from his face. I totally believe that if he could get away with it, he’d put a cardboard box over his head.
He should just skip it. xD Let the poor guy be. He’s very talented, and for some reason, completely endearing to me, even in his hermit-like tendencies.
oh Kaiser, why cant you just state the obvious about the Brange body language…? Brad has his usual “Get Me the F– Outta Here!” face. He can barely keep the charade ;-/
yea – she is one hot mofo bitch to say the least
my girl crush forever
Yea they look way stoned – right on!
I actually like her hair and makeup, but that dress. Ohhh, that dress. Anyone who used the word ‘fierce’ to describe that dress, go to the fashion corner NOW and think about what you said.
Brad looks greasy and ridiculous.
Im loving the dress and gloves, brad dont look bad either. Now if only i can get that dress in a reasonable price in a size 0?????
Jeez you guys are something,i was laughing hard reading all your comments,i guess that’s why this site is called celebitchy.I love angie dress,she looks fabulous,same for brad,as for johnny, well i dont know what to say.
She’s so pretty!
She really is a fabulous bitch. I want that dress too.
Why is it that men like Depp and Pitt can show up to events wearing outfits that look like they were pulled out of multiple, random dumpsters and almost never get critisized for their ridiculous fashion choices, but women always get ruthlessly attacked for every aspect of a red carpet look?
I think that the dress is beautiful and that AJ wears it well. I like the hair, too, and the makeup is perfect. However, I do feel that she keeps getting thinner and thinner and that her size 0 body now looks frail and unhealthy. Maybe it’s time for AJ to see a therapist who specializes in eating disorders. Is Pitt blind to this? If your partner has this type of problem, I think that it is your moral obligation to try to get them into treatment, even if they are resistant and/or in denial.
Where is Vanessa Paradis??.Something’s not quite right with Johnny……he looks…sad….
whoa, the dress is wrong thats its right
theresa: Have you seen how men dress in real life? They’d show up to their wedding in jeans picked up off the floor if they could. Unless they look completely ridiculous, it’s an A for trying at all to not look like ass.
As for Angelina. Boy howdy. This woman has truly outdone herself. I can’t even. Anyone who thinks that dress is anything but something a dom would wear in a San Francisco sex club needs to be reprogrammed.
I’m off to the jellish8ter corner for a cosmo with an extra shot.
EDIT: How DOES she go to the bathroom in that thing? I’m presuming the gloves come off some how. And her hair is a wind-blown mess. Like she rode there with the windows down. You are NOT bringing back the 80s formal wear Angelina. It isn’t happening. Watch her show up to the next event wearing a mullet dress with biker shorts.
she looks stoned, aren’t the 2 stars of the movie supposed to pose together at a premier?
@RHO: Wasn’t that photo taken like six years and six children ago?
I adore this dress, even though (or probably because) it’s totally ridonk. She looks like an eighties supervillain. I want this in AT LEAST three colours.
lmao at the “looks like she just got nailed” thing. She does, and very happy about it too. Why does she have to suffer the cold in such clothes while the men get to wear jackets and layers and all? Is that vanity or do they just not make outrageously priced designer warm-wear?
I liked the dress, very elegant and classy. I can see them throwing back a couple drinks before the premiere. You know booze does hold off the freezing temps, especially when one must wear a dress. So happy about the three nominations, swoon!
I don’t like the gloved dress, but the silhouette is good, like the black dress from yesterday’s posts.
My god, this woman is freaking gorgeous!
And I think the dress looks fantastic (minus the gloves).
Depp looks amazing too — love everything, including the hat with those holes.
Angie is beautiful as always, Brad is handsome as always,, love what both have on, and Johnnny,, Love you too.
Brange looks completely wasted. Look at her pupils in the closeup shot–huge. Wish they would get it together.
Is it just me or she has lost more weight on her face?
She is looking like Jacqueline Bisset lately.
Brad looks smarmy. Johnny looks ridiculous. And Angelina really should get some bangs to cover that forehead.
Mopsie; “she looks stoned, aren’t the 2 stars of the movie supposed to pose together at a premier?”
Can you imagine the headlines if Angie and Johnny were posing together…scandalous affiars non stop! Hence thats why!!
From the guido Brad, to the is she wearing gleeves or sloves? comment I am dying. You guys are hilarious.
I’ll say one thing for Angelina, bitch knows how to keep people talking. And yeah I totally think they got their stroke on before showing up. Maybe that’s why she looks so ‘relaxed.’
To notpretentious, I think she has gray-green eyes, with flecks of gold.
JD looks like a hot mess as usual. Where’s Vanessa? Did they break up? I like that AJ is wearing outfits that Elise would wear. Oh yeah I just heard from a good source that the next breakup is David and Posh. No pics together since September .The source gave me the head’s up on Ryan and Scarlet last week but I didn’t believe him .We will see.
like the dress, love jd look but brad looks dirty and in need of a bath sorry.
The first and fourth pics (where Brad’s hand is resting) make it look like there are bat wings on the elbows of her sleeve/gloves. That would have made the ensemble TRULY FABULOUS, but I guess it’s just B’s hand/cuff.. I was kind of hoping it would be even crazier than velvet glovesleeves.
the close-up gives us proof that she’s injecting her upper lip with fillers. and I don’t understand why. even a “h8ter” like myself can admit that her lips were gorgeous from birth. there’s no need to mess with them, yet there she goes…
You must have your Brangelooine glasses on:). These are two people worth more than many countries, and this is what they come up with? Her hair is atrocious, that dress, no offense, really should have stayed in the 80’s and Brad Pitt took a page out of either a)Euor trash or b)Scott Disick’s fashion pages. They look asinine!!!! Love Depp’s suit tho
I think all of the jetsetting every five minutes is catching up with them. That has to be hard on your sleeping schedule; I don’t care who you are. The body needs the proper amount of sleep and nutrients or it ages before its time.
At their young ages, six years shouldn’t show up so visibly.
Is anyone else out there sick of these two smug faced assholes???
Cosign Craig!
Love her dress, love her whole look. Brad looks very German to me in these shots. And poor Johnny. He looks so much better in jeans. Suits are not for him.
My God, aren’t Jolie and Pitt tired of themselves ?
I see, she has a wonky eye in the making too.
They are such a joke.
The more time goes by the more it looks like Brad Pitt is turning into Benicio Del Toro. I fancy them both btw 🙂
Wow. 130 posts and no mention of She Who Must Always be Named, For Some Reason. That’s a personal best for many of you! Kudos – Mary Jane and fruity drinks for everyone!
Her face is gorgeous as always although I wish she would lay off the botox/fillers a little. Whoever did her makeup is fantastic – beautiful colors esp on her eyes & lips. And Im glad to see she has put on a few pds. But that hair?? and that dress? So matronly? She looks drunk?
Dress. Want. Love. Must. Have. Can’t. Even. OMG.
On a second look at this dress I’ve decided I WOULD wear it…..to spice things up as a bondage costume for my man that would be complete with handcuffs & a riding crop.
LMAO at the bitter Loonifer snarky comments. Loonifers really need to get laid.
Dorrie: Take back the grass and mimosa from Sami. She/he just couldn’t help herself/himself.
@Hamm: 😆