Sometimes, Ke$ha reminds me of Our Beloved Raccoon McPantless. There’s a difference between the two wildly inappropriate drunk children though. Raccoon is all angsty and teenage and “look at me, I’m SO SHOCKING” and she’s earnest in her efforts to be thought of as the most hardcore pantless raccoon EVER. Ke$ha, on the other hand, is also kind of angsty and “look at me, I’m SO DRUNK” but she does everything with a wink and a nod. I guess what separates them is that Ke$ha knows it’s all a joke, and she’s in on it. She gets that pop music is inherently dumb, and she’s having fun while it’s her turn. As I’ve said before, I’ve grown to like Ke$ha because she gives good interviews and she actually seems like she’d be fun to hang out with. Now I can add a new layer to wanting to get drunk with her – she knew “everything” about sex since the age of seven. And she’s been taking care of herself since she was 14. Oh, and she wants her mystery father to be Mick Jagger. Good luck, Ke$ha.

Kesha’s mother taught her ”everything about sex” before she was seven years old, because she wanted her to be responsible. Kesha knew “everything about sex” before she was seven years old. The ‘Tik Tok’ singers’ mother wanted her to be responsible and so from a young age encouraged her to act like an adult.

She said: “I knew everything about sex before I was even seven. My mom left me at home when I was 14 with a credit card, and a box of condoms and the keys to the car and said, ‘Don’t get pregnant and don’t drink and drive’. I had to be responsible for myself.”

The singer also warned that her live shows have a particularly adult theme – including the audience being showered with Kesha condoms – and that her fans should expect to be “visually and sonically violated” by her shows.

She added to Britain’s The Times newspaper: “I’m not a babysitter. My balls are on the table. I’m very upfront with who I am. There is sex. There is alcohol. The kids are gonna figure it out someday.”

Kesha, who has two brothers, was raised by her mother in Nashville, US, and doesn’t know who her real dad is, so she pretends she is the offspring of the lead singer of The Rolling Stones.

She added: “I talked to my mum about it. She has a sketchy memory. I don’t really care. I’m going to pretend like my dad is Mick Jagger and proceed.”

[From Contact Music]

See? I mean, it’s a completely different vibe than Raccoon McPantless, although both are guilty of saying dumb stuff. And, for the record, I do think Ke$ha has a way with words. She might not be book smart, but she’s incredibly quotable and she might make a half-decent lyricist one day. Today, however, she’s a hot mess. Bless her.

Photos courtesy of WENN.