Ke$ha has a new interview with Vanity Fair, which is good for several reasons. First of all, whatever you may think of Kesha’s music or think of her as a celebrity, you should be able to admit one thing about her: the chick gives a great interview. She has a gift for soundbytes and little humorous interview-friendly stories and revelations, and she doesn’t take herself too seriously, which also contributes to her being a great interview. Second of all, the VF interview means that somebody is taking her seriously. And that’s a good thing, because she’s really not the most offensive pop act out there, and in my opinion, a little Kesha every now and then is a good thing. The full VF interview (plus review of her new album) is here, and here are some highlights from the piece:

Eric Spitznagel: On Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve, you told Ryan Seacrest that your resolution for 2011 is “to not be a douchebag.” How’s that been working out for you?
Ke$ha: Thus far, I think I’m doing a pretty decent job. I’m not saying I don’t f-ck up here and there. But for the most part, I think the douchery has been kept to a minimum.

If you’d cut back on the douchiness a little earlier, do you think you would’ve had a better chance of getting a few Grammy nominations this year?
Who knows. Probably not. But it’s not that big a deal.

You don’t want a Grammy?
Of course I do. I was disappointed that I didn’t get nominated. But I’ve only been around for a year. I’m friends with the Black Keys, and they were nominated for the first time this year. And they’ve been around for a decade. That’s like half my life. So I really can’t be a brat about it. I plan on making a lot more records, and hopefully one of them will be Grammy worthy.

On Glitter: The glitter’s not really a choice. When you’re around me, you’re going to get glitter on you. It infuriates a lot of people who hang out with me. They get glitter on them and it won’t come off for days and it ruins their game. But I think it’s incredible.

What’s your glitter budget for a typical year? It’s got to be in the thousands, right?
Honestly, it’s pretty exorbitant. It’s probably more like a few thousand every month. If you come and see a show of mine, there is no shortage of glitter. By the end, everyone from the back of the auditorium to the very front is covered and potentially choking on glitter. I am shooting glitter from glitter guns and out of every orifice in my body. It’s really a big part of what I do. It’s my goal to cover the planet in glitter and take the f-ck over. I can’t do that if I don’t have a sh-t-ton of glitter.

Wait, did I hear you correctly? You’ve got glitter coming out of every orifice?
That’s right. I’ve found glitter in places that will not be named in this interview.

You might want to mention that to a doctor. Would you describe it as a glittery discharge?
No, it shoots out. And it’s coming from everywhere on my body. Let’s just leave it at that.

If your songs are to be believed, your life is one big lost weekend of alcohol poisoning and recreational sex. But it’s all just a metaphor, right? It’s like when Bob Dylan sings about working on Maggie’s farm. It’s not a literal representation of your life, is it?
Everything I write is based on something I’ve personally experienced, or things that my friends have experienced that I just find horribly entertaining. One of my favorite songs on my first record is about this bitch who stole my car. I also did a song called “Dinosaur,” which is about old creepy guys with bad hairpieces who hit on me in bars. I think dinosaurs are the male equivalent of cougars.

I guess. But calling somebody a cougar is much closer to a compliment than calling them a dinosaur.
I mean it as a compliment. I love dinosaurs. I love creepy old dudes. I love that they have so much self-confidence, despite having no evidence whatsoever to back it up.

What about that infamous line in “Tik Tok,” where you brag about brushing your teeth with a bottle of Jack Daniels?
What about it? I do that all the time.

When something like that happens, what’s going through your head? Are you like, “How’d this bottle get in the bathroom? What the f-ck am I doing? Oh my god, what’s happened to my life? I’ve got to get my sh-t together!”
Absolutely not! Jack Daniels is an anti-bacterial and it’s way better than morning breath. Let me put it this way, if you wake up naked in a bathtub and you have the choice between rinsing out with Jack Daniels or trying to make out with some dude with morning breath, I would recommend picking up the Jack.

There’s also option C, where you catch a cab and go home and spend the rest of the day doing some serious self-reflection.
[Laughs.] That’s no fun. I think Jack Daniels is underrated as an antiseptic. Two nights ago, I was in Dallas for the Super Bowl — I played a pre-Super Bowl party — and I was with my hairdresser. He said he wanted a tattoo, so I whipped out my new tattoo gun. It’s really loud; it makes this whirring noise like some scary electronic mouth drill from the dentist. He got really freaked out and said, “No, no, no, just give me an old school tattoo.” So I whipped out a sewing needle and ink pen, and I gave him this tattoo. And he was like, “No, first you have to sterilize the needle!” And all we had was some Jack Daniels. We just kind of soaked it for twenty seconds. And the man still has an arm. He didn’t get gangrene or any sort of diseases.

I’m less concerned that you’re using whiskey as an antiseptic than I am that you own a tattoo gun.
It’s great! My manager got it for me as a Christmas present.

Have you actually given anyone a tattoo with it?
Nobody will let me. Whenever I whip it out, they’re like, “I was just kidding!” They sober up really quick.

You’ve claimed that the dollar sign in your name was meant as a joke, because of how ridiculously poor you were early in your career. But now that you’re rich, can’t you get rid of it? It’s not exactly ironic anymore.
I don’t care, I love it. Looking back now, over the past year, I’m so happy that I decided to keep the dollar sign. It’s the American symbol for money, which is one of the most powerful things in the world. And now, because of me, it’s also a symbol for glitter, debauchery, and youthfulness. I love that. Whenever I’m walking by a bank and I see a big dollar sign, I just have to laugh to myself.

What banks have big dollar signs outside? Do you have an account with Scrooge McDuck?
You know what I’m saying. A dollar sign isn’t just about money anymore. It’s also about glitter guns and whiskey. I really feel like that’s the ultimate subversion. I get off on stuff like that.

[From Vanity Fair]

I had to stop because I wanted to put all of her quotes in! She’s so funny. My favorite lines are “I think Jack Daniels is underrated as an antiseptic” and “I love creepy old dudes. I love that they have so much self-confidence, despite having no evidence whatsoever to back it up” and “I am shooting glitter from glitter guns and out of every orifice in my body”. She’s magnificent.

Photos courtesy of WENN.