It’s kinda hard to have sympathy for a Playboy Playmate after a breakup. Sure you know they’re distraught and despondent and you want to be there for them (and by that I mean sitting in front of the tube watching Girls Next Door while yelling at Hef), but it’s hard to summon the appropriate amount of empathy for tiny waisted, big boobed, tiny brained women. You know they’re going to be dating some C list celeb by the end of the week – worst case scenario maybe a “sorta hot in a rugged way” football player. But ultimately a bunny is going to rally, and a hell of a lot better than the rest of us.

But Holly Madison is still working her tears.

“I wanted everyone to know, because I don’t like to pretend,” she told E! News of her decision earlier this month to come clean about her breakup with Hef. “You know, I wear my heart on my sleeve, and I want everyone to know what I’m thinking.”

While the rumor mill has been consistently buzzing about a possible romance between Madison and unlikely celeb chick magnet Criss Angel, the Playmate is maintaining that the only relationship she has with the Las Vegas illusionist is a platonic one. “Oh my god, we’re friends,” she said at Monday night’s Bowling for Boobies breast-cancer fundraiser. “I like him, but we are too busy. We’re not, like, dating or anything.” Nor are they likely to anytime soon.

“I’m not looking for a guy right now—I’m in love with myself. Everybody should be in love with themselves.” And while she’s clear about the fact that she and Hef are no longer an item, she’s not one to kiss—or not kiss, as the case may be—and tell. “I’m doing really good. I want to let Hef talk about [the breakup] for the next couple weeks…I’m being quiet, but I’m doing really good.”

To prove just how good she’s doing, Madison is getting ready to take her permanent leave of the Playboy Mansion, particularly with the next generation of girlfriends nipping at her heels. “Well, I do have my own place,” she said. “So I’ve got a place to go, but, you know, I’m kind of, like, in limbo right now.”

She doesn’t, however, begrudge her replacements, the arrest-prone Karissa and Kristina Shannon, despite the fact that their recently uncovered checkered past came as quite a surprise. “Well, I worked with them on their Playmate pictorial and obviously I need to get better at doing my background checks, right? You know, we ask on the application, ‘Have you ever been arrested or convicted?’ and they said no, so I took that at face value, but if Hef doesn’t care, than who am I to care, right?”

[From E! News]

I hate to admit this but I actually really like Holly. She’s just a little different than the other girls. It’s nothing spectacular, but you get the sense that there’s a little bit of self respect or class or… something. I don’t want to say intelligence as that’s not quite the right word. But if any of Hef’s girlfriends had to perform open-heart surgery, I’d go with Holly without a second thought. What a way to put it.

Holly will obviously be able to move on right away and snag a guy without a problem. I’m sure she’ll be married and settled with babies just like she wanted in a few years.

Here’s Holly Madison at the 4th Annual ‘Bowling for Boobies’ fundraiser presented by the Busted Foundation at Lucky Strike Lanes in Hollywood yesterday. Images thanks to WENN.