Colin Farrell has a long reputation of being a bit wild and unruly. Aside from the very public bedding of pretty much anyone he wanted, Farrell has a fairly well documented party past. More recently, however, Colin seems to have become a lot more introverted and introspective, proving to be a phenomenal father to his disabled son, and no longer being seen on the party scene.

In a recent interview, Farrell reveals that he started drinking at 14 and realized a few years ago it was going to kill him.

“It was a fairly drunken life for 16 years so it was a tough life change, but I was dying and I’m one of the lucky ones in that so far I’m out of it,” he said.

“For me there was no choice. I was pretty sick. I went away for five or six weeks and that was a very safe environment and I began to come out of the haze that I had burrowed myself into so deeply.

“I came back into the world and everything was in a degree of focus that I hadn’t experienced.”

[From Belfast Telegraph]

Throughout Farrell’s problems his fame continued to grow, which undoubtedly added to the situation. Although his movies rarely earned critical acclaim they made him a bad-boy sex symbol, a reputation he fueled with his wild ways and which put even more stress on his psyche.

He now claims, however, that during that time he felt he was always on the verge of a meltdown.

“Desperation will allow you to do incredible things in the name of survival,” he told BBC’s Friday Night with Jonathan Ross.

“So much of the work that I did I was struggling so hard to keep my shit together. A lot of my energy was going into trying not to have a complete meltdown. By the end of Miami Vice I was just done. ”

While his career was hugely successful, Farrell says that internally he was “in pain” and that his nature was the cause of much of his behaviour. “I had created an environment for myself, a way of living for myself which, on the outside, seemed incredibly gregarious and vivacious.

“I don’t believe I have any chemical predisposition towards depression, but let’s just say I was suffering from a spiritual malady for years and I indulged it.

“To be in pain, if it’s self-perpetuated, can be very sweet at times. You can feel very alive when you’re in pain, and I also know that from another perspective, like when somebody who I love in my life has passed away.

“There is something incredibly internally vivacious about feeling pain or mourning, even if it’s something as egocentric or self-indulgent as mourning for yourself, or pitying yourself.”

[From Belfast Telegraph]

It’s been heartwarming to watch Colin Farrell turn into a thoughtful man and devoted father. He’s been in a relationship with Emma Forest for nearly a year and says he’s out of the dark cycle he was in and he’s very happy. His recent weightloss was a bit alarming to see, though, and led to speculation he may have fallen off the wagon. Farrell said it was for a role, as a photographer in war-torn Bosnia for the movie, Triage, and that he had done it in a healthy way.

You know what’s even sexier than a bad boy? A reformed bad boy.

Colin Farrell is shown out in NY yesterday, 10/14/08, in a grainy photo below. He is shown in the header at LAX on 10/10/08, credit: WENN