Cele|bitchy | Why Celebritiy Marriages are Doomed

Cindy Adams has the highlights of an upcoming Glamour magazine article she wrote that unveils the reasons behind most celebrity breakups. They’re typical but interesting:

The “X” factor. As in excess. Too much of everything. Twenty mil a movie, plus points plus a hunk of the marketing, overseas rights, video rights, DVDs, Oscar goody bags, etc.

Second “X” factor: sex. Too many gorgeous bodies. A preacher says, “Do you take this woman?” whereupon Brad Pitt tells Jennifer Aniston, “On second thought, I’ll take that one.”

On a set, they’re serviced like racing cars. At home, tough for any spouse to compete with wardrobe, makeup person, hairdresser, assistant, script girl, gopher, director.

Playing assassins and action heros, living, breathing and working in drama and fantasy, they need that same breakneck excitement in their personal lives.

The ego factor. When one’s career eclipses the other, you’re talking “Danger – TNT.”

Adams says that New York-based celebrity couples fare better, and cites examples like Matthew Broderick and Sarah Jessica Parker, and Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. Based on some of Parker’s recent statements, we’re not so sure.

In “The Evolution of Desire: Strategies of Human Mating” evolutionary psychologist Richard Buss outlines the reasons why people stray: men need to spread their seed and woman want a well-off man to provide for them. These are prototypical gender-based strategies that people use to increase their chances of passing on their genes to offspring.

Jennifer Aniston had yet to bear biological children for Brad Pitt after four years of marriage so he moved on. According to anthropologists, four years is the average amount of time that a childless relationship lasts.

When looked at from an evolutionary perspective, it’s not surprising that Hollywood marriages don’t last. There’s a lot of temptation around and not much of a stigma attached to divorce.

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