And now for the latest in the ongoing saga of Trace Cyrus (22) and Brenda Song (23). I swear, this thing reads like some kind of Greek myth. Zeus made a goat-boy named Trace and told the goat that if he impregnated a human female, he would be turned into a real boy. Artemis is somehow involved in The Goat Tragedies too, I’m sure, since she is the goddess of all of the woodland creatures. Anyway, back in August, everybody was like, “Hey, Trace Cyrus knocked up his Disney girlfriend Brenda Song.” Everybody sent congrats to the couple and everything was fine. Then, Brenda’s mom came out and was like, “Brenda’s not pregnant by Goat-Boy, she never was pregnant and it’s insulting to say that.” And then Brenda and Trace stepped out together looking loved-up and coupley, but it’s still unknown about the phantom pregnancy. The possibilities: she was never pregnant, she was pregnant and miscarried, she was pregnant and had an abortion, or she’s still pregnant and she’s lying to her family.

So, I don’t know what to make of this development: Trace proposed to Brenda and she said yes. Trace tweeted: “I am very excited to say, last week I asked my girlfriend Brenda Song to marry me and she said YES! We are both very excited to be engaged!” Shotgun marriage? I don’t know. By my calculations, IF Brenda is still pregnant, then she’s probably about as far along as Beyonce. Which means…? I don’t know. In recent photos of Brenda, she’s been wearing layers and covering up her mid-section. There’s no obvious bump of mystery, but you can’t really tell either. Let’s just congratulate them on the engagement. For now.

Photos courtesy of Fame & Pacific Coast News.