Back in January, I slowly convinced myself that Jennifer Aniston was knocked up. The tabloids helped me out, of course, but I also found it odd that Aniston seemed to “disappear” (sort of) for several months, and in the very few shadowy paparazzi photos of her, it was almost like you could see a shadowy bump. Anyway, it turned out that Aniston was not pregnant and she actually thinks we’re “very narrow-minded” for constantly concentrating on the state of her womb, especially when she metaphorically points to her womb repeatedly every time she promotes a movie.

So Aniston has pulled another disappearing act over the past few months – I don’t even remember the last time we had access to new photos of her. So, in lieu of actual, verifiable information about Aniston, the tabloids are just speculating once again that she’s pregnant. In Touch Weekly is calling it this week – and their evidence includes Aniston guzzling carbs and non-alcoholic beer. *clutches booze pearls*

Jennifer Aniston is a creature of habit. So it was a little shocking when she skipped her usual salad and wine combo at LA restaurant Il Covo, where the star, who lately has been the subject of pregnancy buzz, dined with friends on May 11.

“She drank sparkling water, a Diet Coke and a non-alcoholic beer,” a source tells In Touch. Then the normally carb-averse actress polished off “an entire basket of bread and a pizza.”

[From In Touch Weekly, print edition]

First point: that sounds more like she was stoned and hungry rather than pregnant. Like she smoked a blunt and decided to devour a basket full of breadsticks and a whole pizza. Second point: I thought even diet soda was verboten when you’re pregnant, correct? The baby/pregnancy sites basically say “Maybe you could have a diet soda, but try to avoid it.” Third: from what I’ve heard, Justin Theroux is very, very clean-living. No drugs, barely any alcohol (if any). It’s always weird to think that someone with his past drug issues (he used to be a hard drug user), who is now living a clean life, ends up with Aniston. She’s a boozehound and probably a stoner too. Maybe she’s trying to change. Or maybe she’s pregnant, God knows.

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.