Sometimes I see beautiful, classy, elegant women on the streets of Manhattan and I think, “Wow, she’s gorgeous. It must take a ton of money to keep up that look.” From the hair to the Botox to the jewelry and the clothes, it’s expensive to maintain a lot of people’s lifestyles. And it makes sense that the classier the woman, the more pricier the upkeep. Which is why even with monthly spousal support of $40,000, Linda Hogan is completely broke. Look at that face! Look at that outfit! Do you think it’s cheap being Linda? It’s costly, amassing an entire wardrobe of animal print tops that complement her orange skin. Frankly I’m surprised she’s lasted this long.

Hulk Hogan’s wife, Linda Bollea, has run out of money — despite receiving $40,000 a month in temporary alimony payments.

During a court hearing on Thursday, Bollea’s attorney asked the judge to set another hearing to discuss unfreezing some of the divorcing couple’s assets for her own use. Hogan’s attorney, however, wanted to see proof that the wrestler’s wife was indeed broke.

“They have to tell me why she’s out of money. They have to show me in bank statements,” Ann Loughridge Kerr, the lawyer for Hulk Hogan — whose legal name is Terry Bollea — told the Tampa Bay Tribune.

Back in August, Hogan — in addition to the monthly alimony payments — agreed to pay some monthly costs, including repair and maintenance to their home. Bollea’s legal team claims that Hogan refuses to pay for cable, pest control, window washing and their security system. The judge told Hogan’s attorneys to pay for those costs, excluding the security system payments. According to the Tribune, that was not Hogan’s responsibility.

The Hogans starred on VH1’s Hogan Knows Best, and Bollea filed for divorce from her husband after 24 years of marriage in November.

[From Us Weekly]

Sometimes at night when the insomnia hits and I can’t sleep, I lay there asking myself, “Who’s the ugliest Hogan?” I could go all night torturing my brain synapses with reasons why teenage Nick’s deep 60-year-old man forehead creases trump Hulk’s nasal labial fold lines. But then you throw Linda and Brooke in there and the arguments could go on forever. It really is one of the great questions for the ages.

If I were the judge I’d rule that Hulk has to pay for all of Linda’s physical upkeep, bare minimum. Yeah she looks like shit, but I wouldn’t want to see what would happen if she didn’t maintain whatever she’s got going on. I imagine it would probably look like one of those figural candles melting. No one needs to see that crap. Hulk should probably pay for some of the other essentials too, but I’d let him off on the pest control. I would love to see which Florida creatures are attracted to Restylane, and what a preying mantis would look like after it gnaws on Linda’s.

Here’s Linda in her best cougar outfit with her cougar bait boyfriend at the Palms Place Hotel and Spa Grand Opening in Las Vegas on May 31st. Photographer: Judy Eddy. Images thanks to WENN.