Guess who got into an cracked-out fender-bender? You’ll never guess.

Have you ever gotten into a “it barely happened” fender-bender? I have. When I was parallel parking several years ago, I put a 2-inch paint scrape on a HUGE PINK SUV that was parked (OVER THE LINE) and the girl behind the wheel freaked the f—k out. I tried to give her my information and she insisted that we call the police because she didn’t trust me and my attempt to calmly and efficiently offer to pay for the cost of buffing out the minor paint scrape. She called the cops and told them I tried to “leave the scene of an accident”. The cop looked over the “damage” (I swear he laughed at her) and he basically told her that it wasn’t really an accident, and suggested that she just take the information that I offered and take me up on my offer to pay.

My point? That’s something that happened to me in the middle of the day, with two sober drivers involved in a minor incident, and even then the cops were called and it became a “thing.” Yet for whatever reason, Lindsay Lohan crashes her crackmobile every two seconds, gets charged with felonies, drives drunk, stoned and crackie, and SHE STILL HAS HER LICENCE. She’s still allowed to drive around. My other point? Crack bitch got into another accident. This time it was minor (she didn’t hit any babies), but she was still allowed to just drive on. No cops were called. The other driver didn’t even get her information.

Call Guinness … Lindsay Lohan was just involved in her 5,412th car accident — but luckily, this one didn’t require tow trucks or ambulances.

Here’s the blow-by-blow: accident-prone Lindsay chose to get behind the wheel of her black Porsche Panamera after a shopping trip in Bev Hills this afternoon.

A short while later, while cruising down Sunset Boulevard, Lindsay tapped the back of a silver Mustang … that wasn’t moving.

A woman in the Mustang says, “We were sitting at a light and somebody hit us.”

The woman says a male passenger in Lindsay’s car apologized and left his phone number … before telling her they had to keep going because paparazzi were following them.

The Mustang’s damage appears to be extremely minor and cosmetic. It’s unknown if Lindsay’s car suffered any bumps or dings.

[From TMZ]

WTF? So “the paparazzi are following me” is an excuse to not exchange information? How is it possible that Lindsay can continue to pull this kind of dumb crackie BS constantly? Did the LAPD simply give her a “Crackhead For Life” pass?

Photos courtesy of PCN.

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55 Responses to “Guess who got into an cracked-out fender-bender? You’ll never guess.”

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  1. RHONYC says:

    can the LA Parking Authority ‘boot’ a person? 🙄

  2. hmm says:

    how does she look at that in the mirror and think “yeah, i look good.”????

  3. Happy21 says:

    There must be some mistake! Lindsay Lohan is the best driver, she would never get into a car accident.

    That being said how does this mess even still have a drivers license!!???? I find it apalling that she even still has the right to drive.

  4. hmm says:

    this trend of long stringy hair full of extensions is so tiresome. this girl needs a bob with bangs STAT!

  5. Roma says:

    She has a straw. In her hand. But homegirl is sober, of course.

  6. eska says:

    I just love this title! <3

  7. Izzy says:

    You have to be effin’ kidding me. How did the other driver not get the license of the car? Why didn’t she call the cops? I’m sorry, but even if it’s minor cosmetic damage, nearly every car insurance policy has a deductible, so this other driver will be out money anyway. It’s ridiculous.

    Now, pass me a Cracktini please!

    • the original bellaluna says:

      Izzy, it would be a waste of time. I doubt Blohan has insurance, and she’d probably wind up trying to sue the other driver anyway.

      I’m in for a cracktini. And I brought my vodka melon balls! 😀

      • Izzy says:

        There you are, my cyber-cocktail buddy! It’s been a weird gossip day for us here at CB, no? I just don’t get all that wound up about Sparkles and his cheating Tinkerbell. Thank goodness The Cracken has come through for us. And thank goodness we don’t drink and drive – unlike The Cracken – so we’ll be safe from her tonight!

        Bottoms up, my friend.

      • the original bellaluna says:

        Word to that, Izzy! I’m not all twitterpated by the whole RobSten thing, but I don’t like cheaters one bit. I also think it’s total bullsh!t that she’s being excoriated while he’s getting the typical “man pass.”

        Bottoms up indeed! 😀

  8. Lucy says:

    Oh thank god the earth is still turning I thought we were in some weird dimension what with the kstew & cruise drama there has been a significant drop in the crackie drama. All is good in the world folks carry on as normal cause the crackie sure is

  9. jen7waters says:

    Oh dear…

  10. Reece says:

    At this point are there any pictures of Lilo that aren’t creepy?

  11. Elj says:

    GAH. Honestly at this point, can’t we just make “Lindsay Lohan did NOT smash her car today while pissed as a sailor” news items?! Because honestly, it would be more apt.

  12. lucy2 says:

    Well, it is a day that ends in Y…

    Seriously, how does she still have a license????? She’s going to kill someone one of these days.

  13. fabgrrl says:

    Who got into a fender-bender? Hm, who? Well, judging by that header picture, I’d have to say….Rita Hayworth? I mean, the beauty in the photo looks *so* much like her! Or maybe Elizabeth Taylor? Or Marilyn Monroe? The resemblance is amazing. Wait, must be someone still alive…Ann-Margaret! She’s still got it!

  14. Jules says:

    Good Lord her face is hideous. She’s only 26?

  15. TheOriginalMaxi says:

    Ugh, I’m really getting sick of this bitch. I used to love her antics, but with everything going on in the world, I just can’t with her anymore. I bet she needed some attention

  16. marie says:

    wow, a post about Dina and Lindsay in the same day, must mean it’s my birthday, but I don’t remember asking for crack as a present..

    so, is “paps chasing me” going to be a thing now that gets celebs out of paying tickets? well, isn’t that nice..

  17. T.C. says:

    Someone take away her license before she kills. Girl is dangerous to everyone on the road.

  18. Cathy says:

    Ahhhh Cracken, between you and your mother Medusa it’s being quite the day. Cracktinis all around. Make them doubles.

  19. Dawning Red says:

    What’s with that lipstick and eye shadow? She looks like a 40 year old who has just discovered her mothers makeup kit.

  20. Gem says:

    Only a few hours ago I was browsing on here and thought ”Things are pretty quiet with Lohan lately”. Just popped back on now to see this!! Good old Lindsay, never letting us gossip hounds down!

  21. Karen says:

    She should have business cards made with her insurance information and her attorney’s information and keep a bunch in her glove compartment, her purse, her assistant’s purse, give a couple to her crack dealer, bartender, Marmont concierge, basically everyone responsible for her care and feeding. They can just hand them out and move on to the next cracktastrophe.

  22. Dana M says:

    This woman is a dangerous! Get her off the streets before she harms someone. Set her loose on an island somewhere far away.

  23. OrangeBlohan says:

    It wasn’t her fault! That car that wasn’t moving was in her way! MOVE THAT MUSTANG!!
    When are you people going to realize that everyone is out to get her. They have even stolen all of her mirrors!!

  24. laurie says:

    Look at her jawline in the last pic. Is she bulemic too??

  25. midnightmoon says:

    When I was a kid (eons ago-the 60s) we used to buy these red wax fake lips. Now I know why Blohan’s mouth action in the pic on top looks so familiar. And weirdly, to me, that’s the best her lips have looked in years. Am I having some sort of psychotic break? First Douchey John Mayer looks good to me, now THIS?!?! Time to go do a cleanse. I’m obviously all toxed up!

  26. Pku78 says:

    She WILL eventually cause some serious damage, kill people with one of these “accidents”. When that happens, I hope the family/victims sue the H3LL out of the city of LA for allowing this dangerous individual out over and over again! When people get hurt due to this b*tch the city will be responsible for it.

  27. LindyLou says:

    It is not a matter of “if”, it is “when” she kills someone while behind the wheel. I feel sorry for the future poor victim(s) of this out of control mess. My guess is this will happen soon. Look out LA motorists!

  28. Bess says:

    The driver of the other car must be an idiot. Why wouldn’t she call the police and get all of Lohan’s information right there? For all she knows, the assistant could have given her his barber’s phone number.

    I am shocked that Blohan received less than a “slap on the firecrotch” for running into that 18-wheeler. She hit him, tried to flee the scene and then lied to the police.

    Why hasn’t she been held accountable for this???

  29. Black Pearl says:

    I think the only time the authorities will do something about Lindsay is when lives have been lost (maybe not even then)

  30. DANDILION says:

    Lilo is in training mode.. baby steps,.. probably wants to play the role of Princess Grace Kelly and must drive obsessively to learn all Grace Kelly’s exceptional driving skills when she played in To Catch a Thief with Cary Grant., but alas Grace’s death happened on a treacherous twisting mountain road on a route that she often used and plunged down the hillside. Um.. that driving skill story didn’t turn out well in the end Lilo..

  31. serena says:

    Why the fuck she still drives??
    Does she enjoy getting in accident? Is that the new crack fun for her?
    She’s insane.

  32. connie says:

    You know how someone started a petition to get Christian Bale to visit the victims in CO? Somebody should really take the time to petition LA to finally hold Lilo accountable for some of her actions & revoke her license. You know, the entity that actually has a responsability to others and enforcing laws? Maybe THAT would do the trick, large scale negative publicity (although, I don’t kid myself)

  33. erika says:

    I’m making a PETITION TO PENALIZE HER!!

    I’ve had it, seriously, seriously! i’m pissed! i have HAD it with this B****T!

    I told you guys last week, I’ll create a petition online, get millions to sign it, to send to the Los Angeles/CALIF court/police/ etc.,

    to DO YOUR JOB WHEN IT COMES TO LILO?

    i’ve had it!!!

    WARNING: I don’ care where you LIVE if you get into any crack altercation with a cocaine HUSSY YOU DAMN WELL call 911!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  34. skuddles says:

    Let me guess, the brakes failed again right? And of course no way of knowing if Blohan was even sober…

    Porsche’s crash inspection crew must be running practice drills daily.

  35. Tiffin says:

    There are no words to describe her so I won’t even try.

    In the third picture, it’s the first time I can clearly see that her nose is collapsing.

  36. ZenB!tch says:

    That pic needs to go in the Best LiLo pics file for future use.

  37. dread pirate cuervo says:

    How does this potato head continue to get car insurance? & who is renting her cars? She shouldn’t be able to drive a Schwinn must less an actual car.

  38. the original bellaluna says:

    The Mustang driver probably knew it would be worthless to get The Cracken’s info, unless he/she wanted to be on the receiving end of another frivolous lawsuit. I doubt she even has insurance at this point.

    LA County must have received the best beejs in the business, because they have given Blohan the (car) keys to the city.

    *waves to my ladies* I need a cracktini. STAT. (please?)

    • Sugar says:

      I’m convinced an entire “crackmanuel” has been written & passed out to the entire force LILO911-WTF to do if a LILO call happens on your shift.

  39. danielle says:

    I can’t believe they haven’t suspended her license. She’s one accident away from killing someone. the la system needs to get this d-list celebrity off the streetsbefore she kills someone.

  40. Zooyork says:

    Her lips make her look like a drag queen.