Gwen Stefani on Gavin: ‘My biggest accomplishment is my marriage so far’

Gwen Stefani covers the October issue of Marie Claire, and these are some pics from the cover shoot. I like that Gwen did a more “athletically” styled cover, although some of the shots are more traditional gown and dress pics. Can we talk about Gwen’s face for a moment? I think Gwen is being tweaked. I’ve thought that for a little while now. She’s always seemed perpetually youthful to me, but over the past year, I really think her face has changed and gotten kind of frozen and waxy-looking. And I don’t think this shoot is convincing me otherwise, Photoshop or no ‘Shop. You can read the full MC piece here, and here are some highlights:

On rearing two high-energy boys just a few years apart in age: “From the moment they wake up, they start beating on each other. I never knew they would be so physical. They’re just starting to play real well together, but with a lot of fighting. They do look out for each other – especially the little one, he really loves his older brother.”

On what her 10 year anniversary with Gavin Rossdale represents: “A miracle…my biggest accomplishment is my marriage so far. Because it’s hard, everyone knows it’s hard.” She continues: “[Marriage] is something that I always wanted to do successfully. It was a dream of mine. I like the official-ness and the family-ness of it all, having the same name and making decisions together.”

On her relationship with husband Gavin Rossdale: “[Our relationship] is better than it’s ever been. Like, we’re learning about each other all the time. He’s an amazing dad, he works so hard – I can hear him writing songs through the wall, and it is at a much quicker pace than me!” Above all, she adds, “He balances me out. And he – he never stops liking me, which is awesome! It makes me feel happy, that someone likes me as much as he does.”

On having a third child: “I really, really, really wanted one about two years ago. And it didn’t really work out. So…I feel good with what we’ve got. Everything works out how it should. You can’t plan anything, right? You can try.”

No Doubt’s new album Push And Shove: “My favorite record. I mean, your favorite record is always the last one you did, but it really is—it’s a really great record.”

Being a mom and a rock star: “I was definitely swimming upstream,” she says, “trying to balance everything that’s been going on with having kids and a family. There’s no way to do all these things.”

Working on the new album: “I would be up all night because my second baby [Zuma, now 4] didn’t sleep, and he had a lot of ear infections. Then I’d wake up in the morning and do my workout, which I always felt I had to do, and then meetings for my three clothing lines, and then hang out with my kids, take them to preschool, da-da-da. And then at 4 o’clock, I’d be like, ‘All right, I’m out of here, I’m going to go to the studio’ and try to write a record. Sit on the couch [with my bandmates] and be like, ‘Let’s do this now because I’m missing time with the kids; I could be having dinner with them and putting them to bed.’ It was really hard.”

Balancing: “Every day I fail at something,” she laments. “Every day someone is suffering because I’m doing all these things.”

Downsizing: “I’ve got myself in a lot of trouble by not saying no.” The solo career? Buh-bye. Her weight? She’s got a new approach: “This last year I kind of stopped working out. I think my body just needed a break. And so I did that, and focused more on feeling good as opposed to beating myself up.” She’s even eased up her efforts on her L.A.M.B. (Love, Angel, Music, Baby) fashion line. “I have learned to delegate. It still looks awesome, but did I pick out the buttons? No, I didn’t. I missed the last two Fashion Weeks because they were when school started; I can’t miss the first week of kindergarten.”

[From Marie Claire]

I think she does back and forth from being admirably honest to being a bag of neurosis. I like this statement so, so much: “Every day I fail at something. Every day someone is suffering because I’m doing all these things.” God, do you know how much I prefer that kind of statement to what most Hollywood moms say? But what do you think of Gwen citing her marriage as her “biggest accomplishment”? Wouldn’t most moms say their kids? No judgment, it just seemed a little weird to me. Also: Gwen is confirming a miscarriage a few years ago, right? How sad for her.

Photos courtesy of Marie Claire’s slideshow.

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56 Responses to “Gwen Stefani on Gavin: ‘My biggest accomplishment is my marriage so far’”

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  1. David says:

    Wow crazy hot abs.

  2. bella says:

    L.O.V.E. her
    that’s it

  3. hannah says:

    Maybe she meant that she couldn’t get pregnant?

    • Diva says:

      That’s how I took it. I like Gwen but hearing celebrities talk about the balancing act w/ work and kids irks me. It always sounds “woe is me”. When the means and resources they have their “balancing” is nothing compared to the average person. Anyway I’m excited for the No Doubt album.

  4. gee says:

    Maybe she means her marriage is her biggest accomplishment because she has to work to make it work? Like, weren’t there rumors that they were going to split a little while ago?

    • SHump says:

      THIS. I have three kids, and I wouldn’t call them an accomplishment. They aren’t things I did. They’re people, and I can’t take *that* much credit for who they are, IYSWIM. My marriage, that is something I work at, consciously. It’s a two person job and it DOES take work. I feel where she’s coming from. Calling your kids an accomplishment would (to me) feel like it sort of devalues their autonomy.

    • LadyJane says:

      The absolute best thing you can do for your kids is look after your marriage. ‘Mom’ and ‘Dad’ is their world. And if that falls apart, it scars them for life, and destroys their security. I know there are a lot of couples out there who are in a marriage they shouldn’t and it is better for the kids if they split. But in non-abusive situations, it just takes 2 people willing to be grown-up and prioritise the marriage for the family and the children to thrive. THAT is an accomplishment that anyone should be very proud of. It isn’t said enough.

      • megan says:

        Thank you, great comment! I’m newly married, no kids yet, but my husband and I have both agreed that while kids are obvs quite important, we are not going to overschedule, overstimulate, and overspend on our children to the detriment of our owns needs as adults, humans, and partners.

      • Aotearovian says:

        Well said. How I see it is – the two of you brought these people into the world. They exist BECAUSE OF YOU, TOGETHER.

        That’s huge, and that means you have a responsibility to each other, unto death – whether your marriage endures or not – to be good and kind and respectful to one another, because of the people you made.

    • LadyJane says:

      (sorry – duplicate post)

  5. Brown says:

    I really enjoyed that interview. Seemed really genuine. And her body is CRAZY.

  6. bns says:

    Good for them if their marriage is in a good place now because for a while the cheating rumors were loud.

  7. Suzie says:

    Love her, but the blonde hair is really looking fried. I’d like to see her go a more natural colour.

  8. TheOriginalKitten says:

    “Get in line and settle down..”
    That song always gets stuck in my head.

    Definitely ‘toxed as hell but she’s still really pretty imo. I’d kill for her abs.

  9. jc126 says:

    Nice interview, but I totally disagree that “everything always works out as it should”. Totally disagree on that.

  10. DeltaJuliet says:

    I kind of get what she’s saying. Like, I’m so proud of my kids and in some ways they are my biggest accomplishment. But my marriage is MUCH harder to make work. The kids, I just love them automatically and forgive them no matter what. The husband? That’s harder for me. So I guess I am proudest of the fact that we have made it to 11 1/2 years without killing each other.

    That sounds awful lol but it’s totally the truth.

    • chichai says:

      I took it as that when she said marriage, she meant everything with it including the kids. Being a mom always came to me as a full time job as well as a wife. Now putting that on top of all the business ventures and her music, my hat goes off to her.

      I am not saying that other lovely ladies here do not do the same thing if not more, I am just saying that I do admire that she works hard for what she has and appreciates it all. I really cannot say the same for other hollywood mommies.

    • Lindy says:

      I agree with this completely! That’s why Stefani’s comment made sense to me. (Also just hit 11 years–mostly happy, but yeah, it does require self-awareness and effort. Not in some drudgery way, like toiling and straining. But in making small decisions every day to try and make the relationship happy, or checking your own hang-ups and desire to be selfish at the door, that kind of thing).

      I do love her honesty about how hard it is to balance and juggle, and how you will always fail at something (and that’s ok as long as you’re trying and succeeding some of the time). But I also do sometimes get frustrated when I hear celebs with tons of money complain about balance–I mean, hell, if THEY have a hard time and can easily pay for the support and extra resources that I can’t, then what chance do the rest of us have?

  11. what?! says:

    I remember Christina doing an interview about talking at length about her husband and her “wonderful” marriage in cosmo a month before it was officially over. the blind about Rossdale is making me wonder if the same thing is happening here.

    • Cam S says:

      @ what?!:
      I know what you mean. I will NEVER believe a word celebs say about their relationships again. Katie and Russell, Nic and Jessica, Tiger Woods and whatshername, even Tom and Katie ALL GUSHED over their marriages right before the end.
      Just don’t discuss it, if it isn’t true.
      It’s almost gotten to where red flags go up if I see in print that they are gushing over their marriages. Sad.

      It’s also sad that these days 10 years is considered a long time to stay married.
      I hope they make it to “til death do us part”. They seem a lovely couple

  12. RobN says:

    If I were a rock star, married to another rock star, and managed to stay happily married for ten years, I’d call it my greatest achievement, too. That successful marriage is better for the kids, too, so it’s not like they’re being disregarded in some way. Coming from a happy home is a big head start for kids.

  13. Isa says:

    I love that statement. Because I feel the same way. Everyday I fail at something. Getting the kids 3 healthy meals, keeping my house clean, playing with the kids. Working full time and going to school full time. Being on celebitchy instead of cleaning up the scrambled eggs underneath the high chair.
    Anyway maybe she feels it’s more of an accomplisment because of how hard she has worked at it?
    Also, I kind of read it as they didn’t even try. Or they did try and she didn’t get pregnant.

    • Lindy says:

      You totally made me laugh with the scrambled eggs comment. I am waiting for a client meeting (remote–working from home) to get started, procrastinating on Celebitchy, and looking at a crust of toast from breakfast that my 3-year-old tossed on the floor. I swear I’ll get to it! It’s just… yeah:)

  14. Lilou says:

    A couple years ago, she really looked pregnant…. Like 4 or 5 months pregnant. And then nothing…. It was weird because it really didnt look like a weight gain….

    So I guess she did have a miscarriage, which is really sad….

    • littlestar says:

      I remember that! She was wearing really billowy, sack-like clothing, and everyone was speculating she was pregnant. She definitely looked 4 or 5 months pregnant. Very very sad, she must have had a miscarriage :(.

    • TQB says:

      I agree, and I suspect this happens a lot more than we realize. Yes, sometimes people start preggo rumors because someone actually ate a full meal, but there have been others based on women showing many outward signs, only to go nowhere. How sad to have to deny rumors that you wish were true.

    • Dana M says:

      Yes, I too think she was pregnant, I saw pics of her belly. Def looked pretty far in her pregnancy. I feel bad for her or anybody that has experienced a miscarriage. They suck!! And having a broken heart forever about it is not easy in the aftermath, but gets better with time. Having The other kids will help ease the pain but the achiness is there, always.

      I love her! Her old songs remind me of my college days 🙂

  15. Jess says:

    I’ve never been a big fan of hers but I like these excerpts (esp the one about failing at something every day). It does seem odd that she said that her marriage was her greatest accomplishment, but having just made the decision to separate and seeing how that’s hurt my kids, I can actually appreciate now what she means by that. If you can make your marriage work that’s a huge plus for the kids. Plus, while your kids are (or may be) the greatest thing that happens to you, maybe it’s too egocentric to say that your kids are your accomplishment (as they are their own individuals).

  16. littlestar says:

    I absolutely love Gwen Stefani, so you won’t catch me saying anything bad about her :). I saw No Doubt on TV last week and holy hell! Her abs were freakin’ amazing! Definitely inspired me to work out a little harder.

    Also, I’m sad that her solo career is done :(. Her two solo albums were awesome – whenver I listen to them, I’m instantly transported back to my university days.

  17. liliwoman says:

    I took her statement on not having a third child, as it just didn’t work out…like either the timing was wrong, or she couldn’t get pregnant. Also, I don’t think her kids would be her greatest accomplishment quite yet. Like Gee said, it’s work. Her kids are her greatest love? but not her greatest accomplishment. I think they had some troubles back a few years ago, when he sprung the long-lost teenge child on her..that would do it for me! Love them both..they are the coolest looking couple. Hope she hasn’t had work done, but yah, her face is pretty tight!

    • Jayna says:

      True. I think when your children are graduating high school or college and you see the young adults they are becoming that that is when your hat and call it your greatest achievement or one of them, that you helped created and nuture and guide your little ones to adulthood and are proud of the young adults they have become or are becoming.

  18. Bengalcat2000 says:

    I have a toggle watch from her L.A.M.B. collection about 5 yrs ago. It was a bit expensive but so worth it as it’s something I can wear for many yrs. Always get tons of compliments on it. Love her, love her style.

  19. Chatcat says:

    I wanted to find something wrong with this interview but…I didn’t. I actually found it refreshing from a woman’s standpoint and exceedingly refreshing from a celebrity woman’s standpoint.

    “Every day I fail at something,” she laments. “Every day someone is suffering because I’m doing all these things.” I’ve never seen/heard it summed up so well. Thanks Gwen~

  20. Turd Fergussen says:

    She looks INCREDIBLE. So lovely, especially when she’s not made up all to hell. Natural beauty, that one.

  21. Ailine says:

    She’s awesome. I love her look. She’s not afraid to experiment with fashion. She’s honest in her interviews and in her songwriting.

  22. alys says:

    I understand her statement about her marriage. Marriage is tough, even the good ones take lots and lots of work.

    Remember she discovered Gavin had a bisexual relationship w/ Marilyn in his 20’s (Marilyn is a male) and discovered his goddaughter was actually his daughter.

    How hard must it have been to weather the above trials in a marriage?

    Think about it. Biggest accomplishment? Damn straight.

  23. yellowshaba says:

    She looks somewhat tweaked but honestly not in a nicole kidman obvious kind of way. I’ve always found her face exquisitely beautiful..

  24. Jayna says:

    Actually, I see few great marriages and that’s what the children see. Great parents or parent (if not close to the other patent) but not necessarily great role models as far as an example of devoted mates. To be raised in a home where they are still crazy about each other with a lot of love and respect for one another is a great gift to the children.

  25. Gia says:

    I’ve always found her kind of ‘meh’ so nothing much to add here, but I get the feeling that she is pretty obsessed with her husband…and I mean in the way that she would turn a blind eye to certain behaviour that would otherwise cause friction in a marriage. Read: boning other dudes. Because, you know, Gavin used to be gay.

    • ZenB!tch says:

      +1

    • Emily says:

      Yes! That! That! That! I’ve read sooo many blind items and non-blind items about the hoops she has to jump through in order to “keep her man” and the things she’s had to tolerate and yeesh… It never reads to me as working on a happy, functional marriage as much as it reads like she’ll put up with anything to keep him.

  26. amie says:

    Gwen does a great job at promoting the image she wants others to see and based on the comments above, she’s clearly succeeded in convincing everyone….

    Call me a cynic, but I don’t believe any of it. I almost fell off my chair laughing when she said she let her workouts fall to the wayside. Anyone who believes that probably believes in the tooth fairy. And as for the supermom image – dream on. She implies that she’s singlehandedly dealing with the kids and managing all the inherent challenges and crises, but never once does she mention the harem of nannies she and Gavin use — even when they are out as a family, at least one nanny is there to do the “heavy lifting”…heck, I’ve even seen pictures where Gavin stood by and let the nanny lift the stroller up the stairs to their London home.

    I digress, but you get the picture.

  27. cyndi says:

    I call BS on this — a lot of the quotes sound like something you’d expect from the likes of Jennifer Garner — a “real” hands-on mom, not a diva like Gwen STefani.

  28. jeanne says:

    Knock it off with the faux self-deprecating remarks, Gwen!!! “Every day I fail at something,” she laments. “Every day someone is suffering because I’m doing all these things.”

  29. emmieapricot says:

    I love her. She seems real and down-to-earth — and she’s gorgeous and super stylish!!

  30. mek821 says:

    I totally get the marriage cooment. Marriage takes work. I’ve been married for 24 years and it takes consistent effort. My daughter, on the other hand, is a joy and a gift. Of course parenting is work too, but it doesn’t feel as optional as marriage. And I would never take credit for my daughter, but I will take (half) credit for my marriage as an accomplishment.

  31. ZenB!tch says:

    I think she looks different because she isn’t wearing the ridiculous make up and of course she is photoshopped but that isn’t her fault. The ridiculous make up is.

  32. floridaseaturtle says:

    I respect her for naming her marriage as her greatest accomplishment. She appears to be devoted to her children as well, as does Gavin, at least by photo ops. Good for them. Truth is, we all will win and fail at parts of both marriage and child rearing. That’s just a fact. But to me, committment and sincere intentions will never go fully unnoticed. Btw..LOVE the B&W pic. Just wow.

  33. Kosmos says:

    I’ve always loved Gwen for several reasons. Always thought of her as being true to herself, having a great sense of flair and style, having confidence and being able to have a successful marriage with someone like Gavin..that can’t be easy in the music world. But sometimes you find out that the person you so admired is not so nice, or not who you thought they were, so I hope she’s the real thing.

  34. misstrishm says:

    In my next life I want to come back looking like her. She’s so beautiful and her abs (WOW).

  35. Bex says:

    Marriage has to come first, ’cause honestly the best thing you can do for your kids is give them a happy home–and that starts with a happy marriage.