Liz & Dick premieres on Lifetime this coming Sunday, the 25th. Because that’s just what you need for a little post-Thanksgiving holiday: the gift of crack. I know there will be people who are like, “Damn, should I watch the Cracken do her best cracked-out Liz Taylor, or should I watch The Dust Bowl and then Homeland?” Well… I’m not going to make that call for you. All I can say is that the reviews are in and they are hilarious. Apparently, this may be one of the worst TV movies ever. GO here to read the Hollywood Reporter’s review – THR got the ball rolling on bad reviews, and now everyone is trying to outdo each other with scathing critiques.
Anyway, I bring up the Liz & Dick premiere because I keep wondering if Lindsay is going to be arrested (for lying to the police about her June car accident) before Liz & Dick premieres on Sunday. Do you think the cops will give her the Thanksgiving holiday (with turkey and crackberries) and then the sh-t will hit the fan? Perhaps. But there is some good news – TMZ says that LL’s probation is definitely going to be revoked. Because remember, she’s been on probation this whole time.
Lindsay Lohan is about to have her probation revoked … TMZ has learned.
We broke the story … Lindsay will be charged with the criminal offense of lying to a police officer. As you recall, she told Santa Monica cops she was not driving her Porsche last June when it slammed into an 18-wheeler on Pacific Coast Highway. Fact is, she was — and lying to cops is a crime.
Sources connected with the case tell TMZ … when the Santa Monica City Attorney files the criminal case against Lindsay, it will go to L.A. County Superior Court Judge Jane Godfrey for arraignment. At the time Lindsay is arraigned, we’re told Judge Godfrey will revoke Lindsay’s probation and set the matter for a full hearing, on grounds she violated her probation in the jewelry case by breaking the law.
In case you’re wondering, the judge who handled the jewelry case, Stephanie Sautner, will not be involved in the probation violation case. Once Lindsay was sentenced, the probation case gets sent to whatever judge is hearing the next criminal case against LiLo.
We’re told the criminal case will be filed soon.
Well, that actually answered some questions that I’ve been asking all along. Judge Sautner bent over backwards to help the Cracken out, but Sautner isn’t going to have anything to do with these new charges, nor with revoking LL’s probation. And it’s good to know that simply being charged with a crime is enough to get your probation revoked! Here I was, wondering if the California justice system’s motto was “Whatever, dude. #YOLO.” I believe that’s what is chiseled in stone below California’s statue of Lady Justice.
Photos courtesy of WENN and Fame/Flynet.
Yay! Happy Thanksgiving!! This turkey just got stuffed.
Ahahaha, nice.
I’ll believe it when she’s in an orange jumpsuit, sadly this song has been on repeat for a while.
That is pretty much what I was going to say.
A question from a legally ignorant dumbass from the British side of the pond – what’s the deal with California law enforcement? Does it basically come down to how many favours (of any sort) you’re willing to dish out or some weirdly misplaced idea that celebrities can’t go to jail?
Either way it still sounds better than what’s happening over here – we’ve got a bloody terrorist scrounging benefits who can’t be deported because apparently making him face justice would be an ‘infringement on his human rights’.
*sigh* Where are the cracktinis?
@ Amelia
A lot of the leniency found in the California courts has to do with overcrowding of the prisons. They can’t just ship them out to prisons with space because of cruelty/separation from family visitors issues.
Amelia its pretty much that celebrities get special treatment. Basically there are two legal systems one for the celebrities and one for everyone else. They have a lovely law called 3 strik that puts felons in jail for life once they commit three felony convictions. Well people were getting life sentences for shoplifting groceries(they finally fixed it this election that its violent crimes only).
Meanwhile Lilo is running down babies in strollers and commiting grand larceny and nothing happens.
Hello Canada!
It’s actually a budget problem in California. They barely have the money to keep the violent ones in (and sometimes even they are released quickly).
The basic problem is that EVERYTHING in California–like raising ANY kind of taxes–is done through ballot measures. Since no one will ever vote to increase their property taxes, state taxes, sales taxes, etc– California has no money.
Some are working on changing that system, but the problem is that they allow the under-informed public to kinda inadvertently underfund absolutely everything, because the voters don’t LOOK at the whole huge-ass BUDGET before they decide. It’s always a knee-jerk, ‘Not MY money’ vote.
I’m sure a google will give you clearer info than what I can type….but I have communicated the basics, anyway.
Cheers! We love Canada–America’s big toque!
Aarrrghh!! PRISON OVERCROWDING IN CA IS REAL!!! The Supreme Court of the US found that the overcrowding violated the 8th Amendment protection against cruel and unusual punishment (Coleman v. Brown.) The suit was brought because people were dieing as a result of overcrowding and resultant insufficient medical care.
The Court mandated that the prison population be decreased. The prisons sent their lower level offenders to county jails. Those prisoners became the highest level offenders in the county jails. To stave off their own overcrowding, the county jails reduced the terms of their lowest level offenders.
Because of financial issues, new jails are not being built. The overcrowding is due to a number of other factors including the 3 strikes law AND illegal immigration. Approximately 15% of people in CA’s penal system are here illegally.
Can we stop with the overcrowding is fake comments!
@Ahoyhoy:
California is taxed ENOUGH!!
The state gets enough tax revenue, the fools in Sacramento waste too damn much of our money. (High-speed train to nowhere,etc.)
Maybe if Jerry Brown and the rest of the gov would quit spending like drunken sailors, we could afford to keep Lohan in jail.
Well, even if she can’t get her life in order, at least she is getting her hair in order. The red looks great. Now, if we can just do something about those lips and those shoes.
Exactly what I was thinking. The wrinkles have reduced. The double chin is gone/not so prominent.If only the lips go, she would be back to the mean girls lindsay
You might want to amend that statement after you see the pictures from her getting off the plane last night…before they get photoshopped to hell and back….bloated , triple chinned ..(no chin lift band on) and grazed eyed with a keeper guiding her like shes blind….thats the real Lindsay…Lohan…
Can she get her cheek implants removed? I assume that is what is going on in there?
I just want to take her away from L.A., throw her in the bath for 24h so she can scrub all the gross away, get clean from drugs/booze, take some acting classes and come back better than ever! One main step: separate her from every single person in her life.
It’s so sad to see the destruction of this young girl :o(
The pics in the DailyMail are so awful – this woman is really sick and should be hospitalized – so sad
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-2235694/Lindsay-Lohan-probation-revoked-lying-police-car-accident.html
Dear GOD! My eyes!
Oh my goodness those pictures are awful! She looks so bloated in the face! It looks like she went on a major alcohol binge the night before.
Sweet fancy Moses, those pictures are horrifying. She really does appear to be spiraling downward, but how far could she possibly have to go?
They have chin lift bands?? :O 🙂 Good tip for when I need it
ok, i get it. she went on a bender because she knows this’ll be her last opy to do the Crack Jive because deep down inside she knows she’s going to jail.
and CA Jail system? I KNOW you’re overcrowded, but how about this…let Moesha or Latika leave early to start hooking again and LI
That was my first thought, too: AWESOME!
whatever dude, yolo — lol thats why i come to this site. love the humor. and im sure shes gonna cry and sob her why me about how this is unfair and not her fault. whatever. i defended her for a while but im over her whole personality.
Well, it’s not a holiday until a Lohan gets arrested.
“Here I was, wondering if the California justice system’s motto was “Whatever, dude. #YOLO.” I believe that’s what is chiseled in stone below California’s statue of Lady Justice.”
I love the visual the statement above invokes! LOL
Would you all like a cranberry garnish on your cracktini ladies? *shake shake* 😀
That sounds crackalicious! Happy Thanksgiving! *clink*
*sits at the bar, head in hands*
Make mine a double with a shot of your strongest Crack-spirit.
I think, just this once, I’m going to go full Cape Codder Cracktini because this truly is a festive occasion.
@Eileen, sounds delicious! Once we’re done with this round, may I offer up a selection of eggnog with rum and a splash of crack juice…
Hit me, Ladies, with EVERYTHING you’ve got!
Happy Skanksgiving to you ladies as well! This is my first holiday without my kiddos so I will probably surface from it as bad as Bloathan.
I’m flying to visit my parents and sister and they are crazy-partiers!
Yes but eileen, you drink for a bit, then stop. And don’t start again right away. Therein lies but one of many key differences between you and The Cracken!
Hahah that’s true Izzy!
fingers friggin crossed, hopefully they toss her in and lose the key..
Christmas comes early this year. Good tidings of great joy which shall be to all people!!!!
So that’s why Black Friday is early;)! Lol someone tipped em off that Christmas was early and Lohan was getting arrested. The gift to the public is the freedom to walk in public w/o fear of being ran over, sued after she attacks you/ steals your camera, or just in general tired of her cracksapades.
Again- GAH! the shoes! im starting to feel really bad for her, honestly. (ducks and runs back behind the tree) Thats a horrible background, personal life, parents (yowzer). I mean, she found out on national tv about her half sibling then had to crawl back to the crack den that everyone makes fun of her for. pretty tragic story in general—cue the “intervention”music.
btw-#yolo- new cali state moto, hilarious!
Her home life sucks, she didn’t choose to be born into it but she was and THAT is the area where she’s a victim.
All at the same time she’s an adult now and her actions are having consequences on other people’s lives.
I feel bad for the chick sometimes but she NEEDS jail time, she needs a few years locked up, she needs to know she can’t behave this way.
Not everyone gets lucky on the genetic tip but that’s why we have a legal system, to teach people what their parents failed to.
Yeah, I don’t know if any one here watches teen mom (hey I’m stuck in bed for a hot minute, don’t judge) but Amber got 5 years for failing out of drug court and she is really cleaning up. Last season before she CHOSE jail she was dealing with a bad substance abuse problems and just like Lindsay could not avoid fights, drama and legal issues- I actually thought MTV should be charged with something because they were filming her driving around soooooo pilled out of her mind, while talking on the phone.
I don’t remember her home state, and although 5 years did seem like a lot, she chose this because she realized she was not able to stay out of trouble and she believes that jail time saved her life.
You know, I would feel bad for her if this wasn’t the billionth time she’s done this dog and pony show. She has shown consistent disregard for the law and she needs to held accountable. Having a shitty childhood and crap parents can only get you so far.
I know so many people who’ve had crap parents, myself included (my dad was a raging alcoholic who, when my mum left him, decided he wasn’t going to pay the mortgage and our house was almost foreclosed on), but that doesn’t absolve them of responsibility as an adult. Everyone knows basic right from wrong but she chooses to say, “f–k it” and do whatever the f–k she wants. She doesn’t deserve our pity or our sympathy. She deserves to be laughed at and ridiculed because maybe, MAYBE, the pressure of being the butt of everyone’s jokes will help her change.
totally agree with you but not going to argue the semantics of LL vs victimization at large. yes, youre right but her life has been pretty shitty too, regardless of where the responsibility lies. empathy is not the same as allowance.
crack-coladas all around. i need a drink before the fam gets into town.
*swizzle, clink*
I hate to be insensitive but I think it may be what she needs, to actually do some time. She has the attitude that she’s untouchable and it’s getting old. It’s sad because she was such a good actress.
+1 Yes. Let her spend at least a real month or two behind bars..see if that perks her up
I think it is so strange that she has been blasted in the press for years and it has had no affect on her. Shame hasn’t worked at all. I think her family and her genes have just destroyed her brain. I can’t understand how someone who looked so cute and normal nor all that long ago can look so bad now. Drugs and alcohol have taken such a toll on her.
In my opinion she deserves every bad thing that has happened, and will continue to happen to her. I hope she will finally pay some servious consequences. Otherwise, I am going to have to say that the legal system that keeps letting her off with a tap on the wrist is on the take, or something. How/why else, would they keep letting her get off so easily?!?!
Oh, don’t tease me this early in the morning with this little tidbit from heaven. Next you are going to tell me there really is a Santa and TMZ always prints the truth (as they know it).
Last word from me on this person today.
If and I say IF she is sitting in jail on Nov. 25th I will watch her crack drama, Liz and Dick. Other wise I will be cleaning my cats litter box as I always do when La Lohan is on the telly.
Cracktail time!
Fingers crossed someone will finally put 1 and 1 and 1 and 1 and 1… together, all those times the Cracken lied, obstructed justice, and lied some more and put her away for a time that actually will have to be served in full, followed by a few months of community service.
she’ll probably post bail and be out in 5 minutes again, awaiting the new trial.
Yes my glass is half empty. Blame Lohan 🙁
Part of her deal with the last judge was the waiving of bail if she violated again. I don’t know if having a different judge will matter or not. Now I’m off to Urban Dictionary to find out what yolo means.
hope you are right and the judge will stay consistent.
And I’m had to look up Yolo in the urban Dictionary too XD
It’s be nice if they threw her mom in with her.
Ok the other day there was a post on K stew or r patz hanging out at a club and it mentioned Gavin, the assistant who Lindsay tried to blame this on, who was at the same table (!) and a bunch of super cool people (too cool for the twilight couple, I remember being pretty surprised) who came in and hung out with them. so what’s his deal? And how much must Lindsay hate him right now?!
I asked in the the post but alas, it was stirictly twihards, nobody cared about Gavin’s curious presence.
The bad reviews might actually save her life.
No matter how good an actress she is, she’s not going to get hired if she is difficult to work with….
She’s become a caricature of herself, and notorious…That’s not the kind of fame she hoped for, I’m sure….
I see what you’re saying, but unfortunately the opposite is proving to be true for this idiot because people see the publicity resulting from her crazy and they decide it’s worth the risk-Lifetime is a perfect example. She may have been a nightmare, but they’re going to cash in come Sunday because people want to see the rain wreck. Will it bring her big studio jobs? Probably not. But it IS keeping her in the headlines. Bitch is like cockroach-she lives through everything.
Let the countdown to crack tweets (CONSPIRACY! PEOPLE WANT TO SEE ME FAIL!) begin
Another booking, which means another mug shot for the scrapbook. Seriously, there has got to be a book somewhere with her mug shots.
We were doing mugshot T-shirts but if this trick keeps it up, we’re going to have to switch to tents.
Like they will do anything to her. She will end up in there for a minute or two then she will be back on double, secret probation. 😉 she is the Teflon Cracken!
But, your Honor, it’s Thanksgiving!!! How many hours will I have to be in here?
Newsroom.com has photos of her getting off the plane in LA last night and if you want to see what Lindsay looks like without the makeup and the chin lift bands and the photoshopping go look and a bloated faced triple chinned grazed eyed full fledged /alcoholic/addict who is having to have a keeper guide her like shes blind thru a crowd of papz and not happy at all about them being there…..bet thats a first….
can you post the link?
I was just going to post something about the p-shopping of these pics. they used shadowing to hide her other chin. too funny
She might do a whole 10 minutes in jail. Yeah that’ll teach her!!!
Please. Nothing is going to happen to her and she’s not going to jail.
Exactly. Jail didn’t work. House arrest became house parties. Needed her hand held to finish community service. Parole didn’t keep her on the straight and narrow. Released early from the UCLA mental ward. Sneaks out of rehab. What can they do to her?
Her double chin is still there.. she’s just watching RuPaul’s Drag All Stars and learning how to CONTOUR a little better to hide it. God, that girl is only in her 20’s.. she’s going to have a turkey neck by the time she’s 30.
Good. Maybe she’ll come out without face spackle, that horrific spray tab and realize she better off. To echo someone post from last week, can these hooker platform heels just die.
This gal will not see the inside of a jail cell. Well, for maybe like 36 hours, reduced to 24 for time served.
Then she’s back to being the Great Craken. Tremble in fear, drivers of the black roads of LA. Cry to the heavens residents of NY. She will be in your presence soon and nothing short of the Elder sign will stop her. That which is dead cannot die and even in strange aeons, even Lindsey will lie.
(On a completely unrelated note, how does she walk in them heels? For serious. I’d bust my rear end in those.)
TMZ is always dangling “Lindsay’s going to jail” carrots. They oohh and aahh over how she’s *really going to jail* this time. No, she isn’t. She never does. CA will keep letting her off, she’ll keep making bad headlines and we’ll keep making cracktinis.
I’ll believe when I see it. But one can only hope.
What are we going to do with ourselves if she goes to the joint for awhile? The site won’t be the same without the daily crackie updates. I worry
Yeah, right. I’m calling bullshit.
Cali jails are too full of people with medical cards who were busted with pot. They don’t have room for crackheads who repeatedly crash their cars into other people and consistently violate the conditions placed upon them by the court.
Then let’s throw her in a lock-down rehab for 8-10 months. The kind with no outside influence for the first 3 months. Does Calif have these kind of institutions?
The ‘Hollywood Reporter’ review is the funniest thing I have ever read~ my cheeks hurt from laughing. I seriously may have to open a couple bottles of wine & watch this cracktastrophe of a movie!
In honor of Lindsay starring in this Lifetime crackfest, I think they should rename it “Liz and Anybody’s Dick”.
Kaiser, I’m curious: When Liz & Dick premiers, will there be an open post so we can do real-time comments?
That THR review was classic. This POS is gonna suck so hard! I can’t wait!
I posted above that the overcrowding in the CA penal system is very real. Can we please stop with the notion overcrowding is some fake excuse for releasing celebrities.
One of the main reasons that LL skates has to do with legal representation. I unwittingly rep’d a client who was charged with a traffic misdemeanor. Armed with advice from a criminal law atty, I negotiated it down to a traffic ticket. My client could not have done that on her own.
As I watched other cases, I was quite surprised by the number of people who chose incarceration over probation and fines. These were all dui cases. (my client’s was not!) It may be that the economy plays a part as well.
You certainly seem very knowledgeable so I take you at your word. My question is, is there ever a time when, through your numerouis offenses and probation violations, you ever get moved up on the list of those who actually must serve some time, even for non-violent crimes? Why on earth would someone with sufficient funds to post bail ever obey the law if they were not inclined to do so? It sounds as if there is no chance this cow will ever actually pay for a crime unless there is death or serious bodily injury. Is that basically the case?
I would like to understand something. LL has been arrested for possession and DUIs on multiple occasions, theft, and God knows what else, yet she has never spent more than a few hours in jail. They say this is because of overcrowding. But there are women in the same jail sentenced to 30-,60-, 90-day periods for traffic violations or for stealing food to feed their kids and THEY have to serve their full sentences. I don’t get that. I also don’t get how the California Penal System uses “overcrowding” as an excuse to cut this skanky, lying crackhead loose when she wouldn’t be in gen pop anyway. She would be segregated which means there’s no overcrowding. I’ve yet to hear Steve Whitmore explain THAT one!
This is a quote from LA County District Attorney Steve Cooley “I am telling you, police officers are going to be hurt, some killed,” he said. “There will be more officer-involved shootings, more confrontations with people who should be in prison but are out.”
OVERCROWDING IS REAL AND EARLY RELEASE APPLIES TO EVERYONE!
***steps off soapbox and grabs a cracktini***
God she’s disgusting. Trash. A complete waste of oxygen.
Hahahahaha! Her being in a locked cell for Thanksgiving and Christmas would be awesome.
If the cops want to release people they can release non-violent offenders picked up on mj charges.
She’s a danger on the road and one day she’s going to kill someone.
You know who jail time improved? Paris Hilton. I think Lindsay needs a dose of that medicine.
How did it improve Hilton? The night after she got out, she went on Larry King and straight-up lied about her drug use. She made all kinds of statements about how she was going to help people now that she was so enlightened, which she never did. She still does drugs, sleeps around, still makes racist comments, still lies, and does nothing but party. Exactly how has she changed???
Well, she stopped acting like the law couldn’t touch her after that. Maybe she didn’t change her behaviour, but she stopped blithely flaunting it.
The person who really benefitted from jail time was Robert Downey Jr.
Didn’t Nicole Richie clean up after jail? I think she only did a day or two, though, perhaps someone could help me on that one?
Don’t get my hopes up! She always seems to wiggle out of the cuffs and back onto the streets.
They put some kind of colorant on the part in her hair, didn’t they? To tone down the contrast.
I really like red hair on her, but this shade is a bit overwhelming against her fair skin.
She should have went to jail a lonnnnng time ago.
Off topic/ Is it just me or does she look like Rose McGowan in the 2nd pic?
YAAAAAAAAWN! YUP, OKAAAAAAY….
Nothing will happen. Some lame-ass judge will be lenient with this ‘celebrity’ once again, and once again she will rub it in their face in the media.
she brought it on herself…