You know how Lindsay Lohan is made of crack-teflon? Like, legally speaking. She’s been charged with so many crimes and if she was an African-American man, she would have already hit Three Strikes. It’s not just “white privilege” or even “the LA judicial system bending over for Hollywood”. There’s something else at work – and that something is Lindsay Lohan’s long-time attorney Shawn Holley. Shawn has kept Lindsay out of so many scrapes, Shawn has kept her out of jail so many times, and Shawn has outright lied for Lindsay so many times, I thought their crack-partnership would last forever. But according to TMZ’s sources (Dina), Lindsay just fired Shawn. WTF?
Lindsay Lohan has made one of the worst decisions of her life … firing Shawn Holley — the lawyer who has kept her out of jail multiple times — and hired a New York lawyer, who was suspended from practicing law for 5 years back in 1994 … sources tell TMZ.
Lohan is facing criminal prosecution in both California and New York. Attorney Mark Heller is repping Lindsay in the NYC assault case. Shawn Holley was repping LiLo in L.A. in her multiple criminal cases — most recently the car crash where she allegedly lied to cops.
It’s a stunning development — given that Holley has taken heat for being too effective, keeping Lindsay out of the pokey in the jewelry heist case as well as several probation violation cases. And she’s almost magically made some criminal investigations disappear.
Sources connected with the L.A. prosecution of Lindsay tell TMZ … Heller — who according to the New York Times has been called a “menace to the public” by some lawyers — sent a letter to Holley saying he was now repping her on all criminal matters.
Bad timing on Lindsay’s part, because sources tell us … Holley was literally on her way to the courthouse when Heller sent his letter — she was trying to negotiate yet another sweet settlement for Lindsay in the lying-to-cops case.
Calls to Holley were not returned.
I have several working theories – Bedhead helped!
Theory #1: TMZ might have gotten it partially wrong – Lindsay is keeping Shawn for her LA legal issues, and LL hired a NY lawyer for her NY legal issues. The Cracken just seems like the kind of mess who needs lawyers on both coasts, right?
Theory #2: TMZ is dead-on and Lindsay really is this stupid, and Shawn just got played by a dumb crackhead.
Theory #3: Shawn was looking for a way out of their crack-partnership and this story is just Lindsay’s “spin” on a bad situation. Keep in mind – Lindsay still owes tens – if not hundreds – of thousands of dollars in legal fees to Shawn. And all of Lindsay’s accounts have been frozen and Shawn is not getting paid. Maybe she’s cutting her losses, you know?
Confession time… I wrote all of that ^^ last night, and this morning there’s a slew of new info. Let’s do some highlights!
*Lindsay claims “she never authorized her New York lawyer to fire Shawn Holley and never instructed him to send her a letter of termination”. Except for the fact that her NY lawyer made her sign the termination letter. In Lindsay’s defense, she was probably high as a mofo when she did that. So Lindsay is telling everybody that she loves Shawn and she wants Shawn to come back onto her legal team, Shawn is her second mother (ha), etc.
*Before she was fired, Shawn Holley was trying to work out a plea deal for Lindsay in which LL would have avoided jail time by agreeing to “lockdown rehab” for six months. Shawn was literally on her way to meet with the prosecutor and the judge to work out the deal, but Shawn never made it because… you know, crackie. There’s a court appearance (in LA) today.
*Radar says that I was right about one thing – LL owes Shawn more than $300,000 in legal fees. Good luck with that, Shawn. LL apparently hasn’t made any payments in six months. Crack disaster! Oh, and LL’s nnew lawyer isn’t charging her any fees (or it’s a reduced fee) because of the publicity.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
There are so many conflicting reports on the hearing today. Does anyone know if she’s required to be in court? I was under the impression that the judge was going to determine if she has violated her probation and whether to send her crackie ass to jail or not. However, lots of articles say that isn’t the case. I’m pretty sure, at least TMZ said so last night, that El Cracko is still here in the UK. I’ll be watching at 8:30am PST!
Media here in CA are saying only the lawyer will appear in court for her today not LiLo herself.
It’s all very confusing. TMZ, which I normally trust, said she was suppose to be there on their TMZ TV last night as “the judge set a hearing [for today] to decide if Lindsay violated her probation in the jewelry heist case by allegedly lying to cops in the car accident case.”
I so want her to miss it if that’s the case.
Maybe she took the red-eye because now they are saying she will appear at court today. It’s two hours from now so we’ll know soon enough.
TMZ is saying she’s not going to be there and Shawn is only going to tell the court she’s been 86’d. With no counsel and not showing up herself to enter a plea, she’s going to have another warrant out for her arrest. This trick. She just doesn’t care anymore, does she.
“El Cracko”! Hilarious!!
Bwahahaha! That is hilarious!
El Cracko lol lol good one. Lindsey is a female so in Spanish it would be La Cracka.
I can’t believe Lindsay is so dumb to fire her lawyer. With all of her crimes and serving just 3 weeks of jail, she should be kissing Shawn’s butt all of the time. Also don’t trust a lawyer who would work for publicity. That says a lot about him.
She may be a crackroach, but she’s not a stupid crackroach (well…she is, evidently, but anyway-)
I don’t think she fired her willingly.
Over New Year’s we were sitting here, cracktini in hand, watching Lindsay transition into her new career as a professional party guest (read: prozzie).
I think it’s crack-cash flow problems, personally.
Does anyone remember a few years ago, when Shawn tried to drop Lilo and courts decided she *had* to represent her? Is Lilo’s delusion giving me a distant contact high or did that happen?
No delusions, it definitely happened. Holley quit in July 2010 because Ms Cracktastic was (is) an uncontrollable client.
I know TMZ said she’s probably going to show up because she is still listed as LL’s lawyer but I really hope she doesn’t.
That happened.
Holley is incredibly skilled at her job and in no way a fool. I was under the impression Holley put an account aside that lindsey had to put x amount of $$$ into to guaranteed she got paid.
Lindsey would get whatever was left over if and when she and Holley were no longer attorney client.
According to Radar the NY lawyer was sanctioned and not allowed to practice law for 5 years do to a slew of issues. So, the two are a great match.
Dumb twat
Good for Shawn, and will probably suck for LL.
Good luck to the dumb ass.
Run, Shawn, run!!
I hope it’s true just so Lindsay can finally do some real time. Can’t see how she will get away owing her lawyer that much money Lindsay has seen her in court I don’t think she would be a good enemy. Hope Shawn stays fired and Lindsay finally get’s some well deserved jail time.
she’s an idiot, I hope it bites her in the butt.
Thank you Kaiser for making me laugh this early in the morning. I savor slowly any Lindsey Lohan post written by you. I love the way you dissect Lindsey’s shenanigans, and the way you make awesome jokes. Your comptempt for everything cracken is delicious. I will miss these when they throw her in jail for 6 months.
When they lock her up (fingers crossed) we’ll get good stories leaked from the jail, count on it!
amazing that another plea deal was in the works. Forget if she was a black man, if she was a man period she would have been in jail this past year, with another year to go, at least..
The Sheriff really does not want the Cracken in his jails.
She hypnotizes the judges with her firecrotch.
If she isn’t the best PSA for not doing drugs, I don’t know what is.
Lindsay’s problems are not drugs, but one or more severe personality disorders. There are many actress who use/ depend on drugs, but they lack the crazy that drives LILO to act like an entitled delusional maniac raising hell everywhere she goes and creating drama with every single person who crosses her (and sometimes she goes after random people who did nothing to her as well, because she’s paranoid and self- centered and thinks very thing is about her, for example snatching people’s phones and attacking them for taking pictures of her, which she does all the time)
Perhaps her severe personality disorders and paranoia are a result of taking drugs.
I’m sure the drug abuse does not help but I firmly believe she has some mental health issues going on as well. She’s an extreme narcissist and probably has some form of a borderline personality disorder. Her behavior is so erratic and self-destructive it’s hard to explain away as just drug abuse.
I agree. Just from what she tweets and her denials and her family. Girl has substance abuse problems, but she also definitely has mental issues.
I firmly believe Hollywood actors should be required to go through psychological treatment to prevent the side effects of fame and fortune from reaching their brains. Lindsey became an entitled brat early on. Her parents did not help.
@Elceibeno ‘…from reaching their brains’
What brains???
On top of being a drug/alcohol addict she’s as dumb as a rock. No hope here. For Shawn Holly’s sake, I hope she get’s away from this sleeze fest. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to be associated with this loser.
I bet if Shawn doesn’t take her back, she is going to make her life miserable. As in banging on all the doors in Shawns office, threatening her, etc. Didn’t Shawn try to quit a few years ago but couldn’t? Run shawn, run!!!
Not to be superficial or anything, but the difference in Lindsey’s appearance in picture 2 and 3 is striking. It’s like the reverse of the frog prince story, she went from being a Disney darling to a bloated toad.
Bloated toad. Haha.
Awesome recap, and a great start to any day! The looming spectre of jail for the cracken. 🙂 It’s like victory!
I remember way back when the since-recused Judge Bad-Ass was presiding,
Shawn Holley tried to quit this bitch but the judge wouldn’t let her. I bet Shawn went home immediately this morning, framed the letter and broke out a blender of cracktinis for herself. I sure would have! $300,000 in never-to-be-recovered fees is a small price to pay for freedom!
*raises glass*
“She’s been charged with so many crimes and if she was an African-American man, she would have already hit Three Strikes.”
it doesnt matter what race you are, if you arent rich/famous you would have been in jail a LONG time ago with lindsay’s rap sheet. do you thin Rihanna or Beyonce would have been treated any differently?
Jay Z is a convicted felon and yet he is always up and about with our President. Martha Stewart went to Prison but you’d never guess it based on her product popularity. Crimes dont speak, money and influence do in this world and its sad because there are soo many good people who deserve a second chance or even one chance to make it right again.
You forgot one thing…Jay Z and Martha Stewart are very talented and very very very wealthy. Lindsey Lohan is not. Her level of fame is not even a respectable one shes only famous in the tabloids.
Except the numbers of black celebrities (rappers, football players) who are charged and given jail time still outnumbers white celebrities, not to mention those on both sides who are charged tend to face more significant jail time when they are African American.
Jay Z hasnt been in trouble with the law for like 2 decades so i dont think he is a good example. He did his time and is now reformed for a great many years. Martha Stewart did go to prison didn’t she? So again i dont think its the same, you dont hear about Stewart repeadtly getting in trouble. We should be able to forgive and forget if someone makes mistakes and are able to learn from them and rehabilitate themselves.
There are plenty of black celebrities who have been punished far more for far less. No one’s making this up to be cute.
Lindsay, when money gets tight, cut bak on the blow and the limos, not the legal defence.
I’m guessing Shawn is doing Lindsay’s legal work pro-bono…she gets really good press out of it being known as a kick-ass attorney. So, I doubt she’s rushing to charge her. TMZ covers her like a rock star.
Attorneys expect to be paid. I seriously doubt she did this pro bono because when she was hired she had no way of knowing where this lawyer-client relationship was headed. Lindsay no doubt owes her big bucks but Shawn may just continue to let her slide on it because it is so high-profile and good for her legal rep.
Or is it good? Cause if Lindsey kills someone one day everyone will be pointing at her mother and the lawyer that kept her out of jail. I mean that goes with the profession but Lindsey Lohan is not everyone’s client
She needs serious therapy for her mental illness and to get away from the Hollywood zoo for at least a year, but she is broke and can’t afford it. And she has no family support system. Imagine if Britney didn’t have her family to pull her up those few years back.
There are milions of people who have NO family support in life. Who are left alone and lonely in this world, without a soul to light their way, to ease their burdens, to share their triumphs and failures.
They are hard working, dedicated, honest, and caring for others. They learn from their own mistakes or the sh-tty cards fate dealt them, and try to live by paying it forward, so others do not ever have to suffer what they suffered.
This A-HOLE is a dumb, spoiled, entitled jerk whose narcissism is the only guiding light in her life. There is nothing else in her head but ME ME ME!!!
She had all kinds of support, from many other celebrities, from directors, from actors, from journalists, from judges, who all tried to help her off the selfish trip she was on. She squandered every offer of help, every ounce of good will, each time biting or pissing on the hand extended in help and support.
It is time to stop blaming everything in this idiot’s life but her own actions and choices. She is not a kid anymore, and she’s been given so many opportunities that would last others several lifetimes. She is a lazy, delusional fu@kup who will never ever amount to anything anymore. She’s turned into a has-been way before she ever reached her full fame potential. Her greatest con was convincing scores of fans that she was talented and dedicated to her craft.
Now we all know that every single thing she ever said was a lie, every single plan a delusion, every promise an empty word to get herself out of crap of her own making.
It is time to kick this nobody out of our collective psyche. Since the courts will not do justice, we should. There is nothing she fears more than insignificance. Let her crawl back into a roach infested hole that is her life, and live us all alone.
My GOD that was the most brilliant, in depth, strong ass rundown of the blow hard Blohan I have EVER read in print or internet EVER.
it’s so simple isn’t it? she’s a self entitled talentless shit, who pisses on others and every hand that tried to feed her, solution? IGNORE.
just like mum used to say about bullies and loud brats “Just ignore them honey, they’ll go away.” and it’s true.
Her biggest nightmare isn’t dying (cuz she’s trying to gaurantee her spot in the Marilyn Monroe More Famous Dead society, so ignoring her? It’s the most brutal abuse…
I am sure Shawn will show up today because I bet if she was just fired, she is still listed as her attorney. They will offer her the deal, Lyndsay will take it and avoid jail. Again. Watch. 🙁
I agree, maybe. I think Crackie would prefer to take jail because it’s shorter and she won’t have to do the rehab and therapy “work”.
Shes an idiot!!!! Shawn was the only thing that kept her ass out of jail. This should be intresting. Crackhead isnt going to tone down her crackness anytime soon, so we all might get what we want. Her ass in jail. Also, what an ungreatful cow, this is a women who saved her so many times and she stiffs her. Shawn worked her ass off for her, what garbage.
I smell desperation, I’m just not sure who it’s coming from.
Wow! Her lawyer saved her a** so many times. That is f**ked up for her to be fired. Now, I hope that Lindsay will finally be forced to serve time in jail that she rightfully deserves…
Well, we can all hope. But I don’t see the crackenmonster being put in jail. Shawn will show up and work her magic and the crackenmonster will walk free again.
This girl is the effed-up golden child of our times. No one, NO ONE holds her accountable.
No kidding. This idiot has never been told no in her entire life, even when she breaks the law there’s always someone there.
1) Shawn is probably throwing a party right now to be rid of Crackclient supreme.
2) I bet Lindsey owes Shawn a ton of money in unpaid legal bills and maybe this is a preemptive crack strike before it becomes public Shawn dumped her.
3) Shawn may have been going to the courthouse to remove herself as Lilo’s attorney.
Those are my guesses on the matter.
There are two things that you never want to do on the cheap and two people you never want to not pay – accountants and attorneys. I have a feeling she is going to regret firing Shawn.
Hopefully, Lindsay will be sentenced to jail for at LEAST six months and this time she won’t squirm out of it. If she goes into withdrawal in jail the crackhead should get the minimum amount of medical attention required to keep her safe but should be expected to tough it out like so many others. Spending a year in a psychiatric facility might do her some good too… otherwise, I get the feeling the last footage of Lindsay’s life will be of her convulsing on the sidewalk like River Phoenix.
I can’t watch the live stream at work.. someone give me updates!!!
Shawn showed up for her – she skated again, at least for now…
You’re the best!
ohhh Jaysus Christay….
this is the reason i could NEVER ever be a lawyer, tragically, I can argue my way out of a trash basket but I can’t argue on the behalf of a piece of trash basket case such as the Crackroach…
There is a way we could get HoLo in jail and that is a UNIFIED PRAYER/Moment of silent persuasion. Seriously! On the eve of her court case/or morning of if we all took 3 minutes of silence and just prayed/wished (for the non religous) HoLo’s butt into jail.
ThIS could PUT her in JAIL! What do y’all think? If we combined our energetic thoughts we could power over the energy in court in LA!
What do’y all think?! siton the toilet in the ladies restroom, in your car, take a 5 min break and go for a walk. 5 MINUTE ENERGETIC /TIME OF PEACE!!!
She really is one of the least intelligent people on the planet. She’s one of those people, though, that thinks they’re actually quite savvy and a brilliant artist. She’s not, of course, but I wouldn’t be surprised if she thinks she’s pulling some kind of clever move for whatever reason.
How much do you want to bet that when she gives her next interview, and when she blames “the people she’s surrounded herself with” for her problems (as usual), Heller or Holley will be one of the ones listed as “bad influences”?
What gets me is when she talks about how excited she is to work with someone, or how much she idolizes someone or how brilliant she thinks the work will be, and then she shows the people who have given her work, help and opportunities no actual respect, and then badmouths them or treats them like crap after she screws things up. like, she kept talking up Liz and Dick like it was great work. But then in her interviews, she badmouths Elizabeth Taylor, we hear about her saying that she thought the script was weak after the bad reviews came in, and then her badmouthing her coworkers to Paul Schrader in that NYT article. Then talking about how exciting it is to work with Paul Schrader and Brett Easton Ellis, then treats the whole project and her coworkers like crap. Now she fires Holley, who has kept her out of jail for the most part and worked wonders for her.
It seems like she really hates the people who are good for her, who truly help her, and yet clings to the people most toxic to her, like her mother. It’s almost like some kind of subconscious masochistic thing at this point. Like she’s trying to destroy her life.
Boom