Mindy McCready is dead of an apparent suicide at 37


In case you’re not familiar with Mindy McCready, she’s a country singer with some hits in the late 90s, including “Guys Do It All The Time.” She’s known more recently for her tragic personal life than her career, and we’ve covered her occasionally when she’s made headlines. Mindy lost her partner and second child’s father, David Wilson, in an apparent suicide by firearm last month. She denied any involvement in his death, and appeared genuinely sad in interviews discussing her loss. After her partner died, Mindy went on a downward spiral. Her father said in court documents that she “sleeps all day, drinks all night and is taking Rx drugs” and added that she wasn’t “bathing or even helping take care of her 2 children,” Zander, 6, and Zayne, 10 months. She was ordered by the court to attend rehab, which she did for just a day, checking out to attend some sort of outpatient treatment. Unfortunately Mindy is dead in an apparent suicide after reportedly shooting herself, and her dog, yesterday. Her children are in the care of her parents and they do not seem to have been with her at the time.

Country music star Mindy McCready was found dead Sunday at her home in Arkansas from an apparent self-inflicted gunshot wound, the local sheriff’s office said in a statement. She was 37.
Deputies from the Cleburne County Sheriff’s Office were dispatched to a report of gunshots fired Sunday afternoon and found McCready’s body on the front porch, the statement read.

McCready leaves behind two boys, one of whom is 10 months old. The infant’s father, record producer David Wilson, died of an apparent suicide last month.

The singer struggled with addiction and mental illness, often publicly. She appeared in an episode of “Celebrity Rehab” three years ago with Dr. Drew Pinsky, who said he contacted her last month after her boyfriend’s death.

“When I heard she was struggling, I did reach out to her and urged her to go to take care of herself, get in a facility if she felt she needed,” said Pinsky, who hosts his own program on CNN’s sister network HLN.

“Her biggest fear was the stigma of doing so and what people would think if she, God forbid, took care of herself. And this to me is the most distressing part of this story. She is a lovely woman, we have lost her, and it didn’t have to go down like this.”

McCready burst onto the music scene in 1996 with her debut album “10,000 Angels,” and the chart-topping hit “Guys Do It All the Time.”

In the past few years, McCready waged a public battle for custody of her elder son, Zander. She took the boy from her mother, who had custody, and fled with him to her home in Arkansas, saying she had concerns over his safety.

[From CNN]

RIP Mindy. This is sad and useless, but it particularly bothers me that she shot her dog. She must have been in a very deep dark place to have gone through with that. I hope her kids are ok and are being well cared for by their grandparents.

Mindy and her departed partner, David Wilson. (Note that I did not apply the filter on this image. That’s how it was posted originally before either of them passed.)

some photos credit: WENN.com

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163 Responses to “Mindy McCready is dead of an apparent suicide at 37”

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  1. PHD Gossip says:

    Blame Roger Clemens for taking advantage of her beginning at age 15.

    • lexy says:

      That is a disgusting thing to say. How is blaming the living for suicides a good thing to do?

    • Alexandra Bananarama says:

      Playing the blame game is cruel after a suicide. You can’t know what the tipping point was so speculating is pointless.

      To have any tragedy and then to feel like there’s nothing that can help you is heartbreaking. Her poor kids:(

    • michele123 says:

      He has his share of the blame. We go through life not realizing the extent of the impact we have on each other.

    • jwoolman says:

      I doubt that you can blame him for this. Mental illness will come out eventually no matter how serene the person’s history. This is like people blaming Kevin Federline for Britney’s problems, even though the signs of her illness were starting long before she even knew him. Kevin just didn’t know what to do with her as her behavior became increasingly erratic, although he certainly came through for her and their kids when she really melted down later. I don’t know much about Mindy and Roger, but I do know plenty of people who were sexually active at 15. They may be unwise, but it’s not as though they were six years old. In many countries, 15 is the legal age of consent for a reason. Normal people do recover from bad relationships at any age. If she didn’t, it wasn’t because of anybody else but rather just a manifestation of her underlying disorders.

      • rose says:

        ^This

      • Lee says:

        I completely agree that blaming others for someone’s suicide is useless and dangerous but the idea that mental illness will ALWAYS manifest in someone who is predisposed is inaccurate. Genetics often play a significant role in predisposing someone to mental illness, but environmental factors have a massive effect as well and someone who may otherwise have developed bipolar, schizophrenia or depression may end up ok under safe and stable conditions while someone who had a very mild predisposition may go completely over the edge with enough trauma/stress.

        I just think it’s important to point this out since we have little to no control over our genetic profiles but can nonetheless prevent or limit mental illness through interventions on the interpersonal/emotional/contextual level. Plus, the idea that one is doomed to a life of permanent and/or inescapable mental illness with the ‘right’ predisposition can contribute to stigma and is also a devastating idea for people trying to recover in mental illness.

    • DGO says:

      There were rumours about her being sold to the highest bidder when she was just a kid. I often wonder if that was the real source of her problems.

    • Gemini08 says:

      You can’t blame someone for the choices of a 37 year-old woman. Sorry that doesn’t fly. Mindy had serious mental issues and addictions that she was never able to get control of. Roger’s role I’m sure didn’t help the situation but “blame” him. Give me a break. That’s like saying you get a pass to blame your parents for every mistake you’ve made. Adulthood doesn’t work that way.

    • CooCooCatchoo says:

      Y’know, I thought about the whole Roger Clemans affair when I heard about her suicide too. He was so wrong to start things with her when she was 15. She was still a child. I know many people who were sexually assaulted as children, and it set the whole tone for their lives – most are on drugs, self-destructive and have made terrible life choices. If an adult took advantage of my 15 year old, I’d be out for blood. No one took care of Mindy when she was a kid. I blame her parents.

      • DeltaJuliet says:

        Yes and no. I was drugged and sexually assaulted at 15. And sure I have issues (like everyone does) but I’m a gainfully employed, educated, married woman with 2 kids. You can’t blame one experience for every.single.bad thing that happens to you.

        It’s very sad that she couldn’t cope with her issues and took her own life. It’s too bad she couldn’t get help to be there for her kids but thank God she didn’t take them with her.

      • ll says:

        Mindy did not want her mother to have custody of her children and there are reasons for that. I cannot claim to know what they were but Mindy had her concerns and the courts ignored them. I think that she was into these abusives relationships like the one with her oldest sons father because she was abused as a child. Her mother made this womans life a living hell for years and I think that the boyfriends suicide and the cops acting like she killed him and her depression and her father bailing on her and forcing her into treatment and grabbing her kids again was too much for her. She had no time to grieve, no time to try to get it together and having lost myt husband when I was 26, it takes a long time to get over that and the fact that he commited suicide was another heavy burden and I am sure that she was walking a thin line. SHe has been treated badly by the cops and her parents. Dr Drews Tv show is a joke .No one gets cured from addiction, they learn to live with that addiction and to control it but there is NO cure and these TV shows that profess cure andn take someone in for a month and then turn them lose??are a jokme. Mindy had too much slamming her. Her parents who IMO are worthless and then the cops trying to make it sound like she murdered her BF, her dad dumping her because she slept all day and drank, he was buying her the booze because she wasnt going out to get it, and the mother who’s sole goal in life was to ruin Mindy and take her kids ,the control freak mother..I don’t know how Mindy hung on as longa as she did.I hope to God that the courts give those 2 boys to the oldest sons daddy so they can be raised together and he can keep them away from her family.

  2. Abra says:

    Those poor little boys.

    • Jano1981 says:

      He father filed a document with the courts. among other things he stated she was extremely verbally abusive towards her oldest son, violently unpredictable and not caring for either child. Lets not forget that her partners death is still being investigated. Also she must have felt that her dog couldn’t live without her so she killed the poor dog, what if she had her kids and felt that they couldn’t live without her too?!? Some people are so far gone and with mental illness and substance abuse that the kids are, at least in the immediate future, better off. Sad.

      • T.C. says:

        Good thing her kids weren’t with her when she decided to kill her dog. She would have shot them too before killing herself.

      • It'sJustBlanche says:

        While I have nothing but sympathy for her and her situation (and I do feel some of the things she went through with an older man when she was a teen messed her up and I hope he feels like crap) she did not need to be around those children.

        I hope they’ll be okay and I hope her parents can at least care for them properly. Poor babies.

      • michele123 says:

        I think she thought the kids were better without her. The dog was the last thing holding her back.

  3. paola says:

    I don’t understand: she had problems of addiction and mental illness for years, how could she have a gun? Maybe because I am a foreigner, but I really don’t get it.

    • lisa2 says:

      I’m not foreign and I don’t understand it. Her father (or a family member) said she was depressed after the boyfriend dies. That she had been in bed for 3 weeks, not eating or bathing but drinking and taking medication. I don’t know how she got to the location. Did she drive or walk. If she was depressed to that degree. Was she being watched. Did they remove sharp objects from her reach.

      I just find this whole thing so tragic. Especially for those babies left behind to forever wonder why their mother left them.

      • emmie_a says:

        Her dad was staying with her at her house up until yesterday morning. He tried to make sure she was safe and must have thought she was ok to be alone but she wasn’t. so sad.

        And I agree about shooting the dog. Why take such an innocent creature? Although I like to think my little fur baby couldn’t live without me, I know she loves my dad and would be happy living with him when I’m gone.

      • Meredith says:

        Her father couldn’t force her to get help for her mental health problems or addictions. I’ve heard that once a person makes up their mind to commit suicide, it’s not easy to stop them. They’ll find a way. It’s a blessing get kids were with someone else when she did this. In her state of mind, she might have killed them too along with herself and the dog. Very sad for the family.

    • fabgrrl says:

      Gun “rights” are so prevalent in this country that even those /few/ who are not deemed capable of owning weapons can easily get their hands on them. 🙁

      • BooBooLaRue says:

        sadly it is easier to get a weapon in this country than it is good mental health care. RIP

      • apsutter says:

        Excuse my language but it is f***ing ridiculous how easy it is to get a gun in this country. I can’t afford insurance and all the good things that actually help troubled people are unattainable if you’re poor. Yet, if I wanted to go out and buy a gun I could find one in an instant. I could literally have one by days end.

      • the original bellaluna says:

        Yup. Guns: YES; affordable healthcare: not on your life!! (No pun intended.)

    • TrustMeOnThis says:

      Americans love their goddamn guns. I’ve lived here all my life and I don’t get it either.

    • Masque says:

      There are lots of ways to get a gun. Private gun sales happen every day, everywhere.

      • Isa says:

        Meh. She would have just overdosed.
        Also, she may have not went out and got a gun. She may have owned it for many, many years. I agree she shouldn’t have had one in her mental state. But she did have opportunity to get mental help at rehab.

    • Greenie Djinn says:

      Foreigners need to stop thinking Americans are stupid about guns. We’ve listened to every argument against ownership and we don’t need foreigners to lecture us on the issue. In fact, get a visitor’s visa and take that weirdo Piers Morgan to your country. Keep him there.

      In case you’re not getting it; most American’s don’t buy the concept of “gun violence” any more than we believe assault weapons cause mass shootings. If you buy the concept, please, by all mens surrender your weapons and rights to own. Just stay in your country.

      • Apsutter says:

        News Flash: Most of the people replying are Americans and your ignorance of “foreigners” is astounding.

  4. Hautie says:

    Honestly, I thought the police were going to arrest her over the death of the boyfriend.

    And to assign blame to anyone but Mindy… is ridiculous.

    She was 37 years old.

    Many people have been in her life for the last decade, desperate for her to dry out.

    She was an adult and made her own decisions. With many of them being very bad decisions.

    • Seagulls says:

      Lots of people make terrible decisions when they’re made through the lenses of mental illness and addiction. I feel terrible for her, her dead boyfriend, their families and her children.

      There are few tragedies worse than suicide.

      • gg says:

        Mental illness is an internal hell and isn’t usually mitigated by practicality, common sense, or even compassion. It’s a free-for-all inside a mentally ill person’s head.

        This makes me very sad. I feel like deep down beyond the addiction and mental illness she had a beautiful soul.

    • Gemini08 says:

      She also struggled with mental illness for the majority of her life. I don’t blame anyone for what happened to her but I also “get” what mental illness along with addiction can do to a person’s psyche. There is no blame here. Only sadness because this woman left behind two small children who now no longer have a mother and this will one day have to be explained to them. Many people with mental illness turn to drugs and alcohol mainly because they go undiagnosed for so many years. This seems to have been what happened to Mindy. By the time she actually did start getting help she was addicted.

  5. truthful says:

    She shot herself on the same porch that her boyfriend did..so sad

    RIP

    and peace to her family and children

    • Hautie says:

      I thought her boyfriend was found in their closet. Not the front porch.

    • Jen says:

      That makes me wonder if she shot her boyfriend because of issues in their relationship…like he was wanting to leave and could not live with what she did and short herself. Either way, she only has to worry about her soul.

      • Gemini08 says:

        No, I think this woman was sad and depressed and on drugs and alcohol and was in a co-dependent relationship with someone with the same issues. She suffered from mental illness and addiction and simply could no longer cope. So sad for her two little boys.

  6. Para_meid says:

    Leann’s friend…they have a nice pic 2gether.Rip

  7. Pont Neuf says:

    Poor lady – I know several people who have had to deal with depression and severe mental problems, and no matter how hard they try, if they don’t have an extensive support network of family and friends, plus intensive therapy, they can never overcome the illness that’s wrecking their lives. Apparently, Mindy didn’t have a good relationship with her family and appears to have been quite isolated. Rest in peace.

    I hope that her children can find a safe, loving home that will help them to deal with the effects of so many tragedies.

    • jwoolman says:

      Ultimately, no network of friends or family or therapists can help if the person can’t deal with it on the inside. People always like to tear themselves up when this happens, wondering what they could have done to prevent it. But the buck stops with the individual, unfortunately, even if the situation is more than they can bear internally. I don’t know her particular diagnosis, but with bipolar individuals the risk of suicide is actually highest when they’re feeling a little better (so people close to them would think the danger had passed ). In the depths of a depression, they think about suicide but typically can’t gather the strength to do it. But once energy returns enough, if they can’t take that dark despair any longer and see no respite from it – that’s when they may kill themselves to stop the pain once and for all.

      • Lee says:

        Yes, unfortunately the risk of suicide also increases for individuals suffering from major depression as they begin to recover for exactly the same reasons you stated. This is one of the many reasons why it’s so important that there’s a better mental health system in place so that medical follow-ups can be carried out regularly. Prescribing someone anti-depressants with no supervision may actually increase the likelihood of suicide in some cases.

        I know very little about Mindy (nothing aside from what I’ve read here over the last few months/years) but as someone who has both lived with and extensively studied mental illness (and works in a related field), I’m glad that, at the very least, such a tragic event can open up a dialogue. Still, so sad.

  8. swack says:

    RIP Mindy.

  9. Jen34 says:

    Very, very sad.

    I am grateful that her children weren’t with her at the time. The outcome could have been more tragic.

  10. T.Fanty says:

    You know, people love to drool over Lohan, Leeann, or whomever the latest trainwreck is, but this is where they end up. I’m not judging anyone, but we read so much about people’s messed up lives, but what we joke about is someone’s day to day existence, and can become unendurable. i don’t think it hurts us to remember that once in a while. I hope her children are okay.

  11. marie says:

    sad situation for her kids and family left behind.

  12. brin says:

    Very tragic but not surprisng. And as an animal lover, I’m with you, CB…why kill the dog?

    • bettyrose says:

      My first reaction to this was that she wanted to protect her dog from mourning her loss. I know that sounds screwed up but it was probably done out of love for the dog.

      • the original bellaluna says:

        Or she was worried about who would take care of him/her, and didn’t want him/her to be left alone or at the mercy of strangers.

      • foobie says:

        I agree. I think it could also be that she chose to destroy the last thing that could stop her from taking her life, so there’s nowhere else to go from there but onward to her own death.

        The thought of intentionally killing off all hope (literally killing in this case)…

        It’s awful. 🙁

      • michele123 says:

        Foobie – I was thinking the exact same thing.

    • Mauibound says:

      Maybe she was thinking no one would care for the dog after she was gone, mental illness is cruel no matter if its depression all the way to the other end of the spectrum. People suffer and I wish it was handled so much better

    • curegirl0421 says:

      I had a friend who did the same thing; his dog was his best friend, his only real touchstone – his family had lost meaning for him, but that dog was like his other half. He shot the dog first, then himself – it was really shocking, but not surprising. As one other poster said, I’m glad her kids weren’t in the house. RIP Mindy I hope you find the peace in death that you never found in life.

    • Hakura says:

      I immediately thought that perhaps, in her warped state of mind, she viewed it as ‘taking the dog with her.’ Maybe, after isolating herself from everyone (except the dog) for so long, she did it just to know she’d have someone loyally waiting for her, on the ‘other side’.

      Once she’d done it, she probably felt there was no turning back, that she had ‘no choice’ but to go through it. Or even simply, because she didn’t want to go alone.

      It brings me to tears even typing/thinking that, it’s so painfully sad.

  13. Daz says:

    Just thank god she didn’t have the kids, other wise it wouldn’t be just the dogs life she took with her

  14. Elisabeth says:

    she shot the f’ing dog? jeez

  15. Jennifer12 says:

    I’m sorry for her pain and wasted life, but what she put her sons through is horrendous. She never took care of the older one, became verbally abusive to him the past year, and could barely be bothered with the baby. I don’t understand why this woman had children. And why shoot the dog? I’m sorry for the tragedy, but she never seemed like a good person and was a truly terrible parent.

    • Jennifer12 says:

      And, would like to add: Pinsky claims she didn’t want the stigma of taking care of herself. Yet no one questions why she wouldn’t take care of her children and why she felt no stigma with that.

    • foobie says:

      I’m guessing it’s post-natal depression on top of all the terrible suffering she was already undergoing.

      I’ve had it and there were some moments when I couldn’t bear to look at my baby, let alone care for him.

      • Jennifer12 says:

        I’m not sure that’s correct. Her older son was five when his brother was born and she had little interest in caring for him. I guess it’s possible with the little one, but my gut feeling says this is a woman who liked the idea of having a baby, but had no concept of how to be a day-to-day parent. But maybe it’s possible? I say no because her issues were so well documented.

    • Dena says:

      As mentioned so many times, I hate that her mental and emotional problems drove her to this. She had to have felt really alone, perhaps scared and truly unhinged I am guessing.

      I read that her eldest son’s father beat the crap out of her just before finding out that she was pregnant with his child. He served 30 days for that or something like that. While that is not a good reason to abuse a child (sins of the father), in life, that unfortunately happens.

      She really seems to have had a tragic life relative to some people.

  16. some bitch says:

    This is so sad. The state of America’s mental health system must change.

    • Ok says:

      Honey she is an addict. No matter what is available to a person in terms of help, you have to want to do the work to get better.

      Nothing will help a person if they are not willing to help themselves.

      And the idea of mental health being a stigma…….??? This is not the 1950’s.
      Citing some sort of stigma of society is just another excuse that a severe addict uses to still keep drinking and drugging.

      • vvvoid says:

        Her addiction was a symptom of her mental illness. It’s true that an addict has to want help to fully benefit from it, but by no means is it true that there is no way to help someone actively using drugs to become gradually more ready to give sobriety a try through therapy.
        I was gradually becoming ready for rehab via therapy for 2 years leading up to when I actually put myself in rehab. It’s a process. The therapist does not have to insist you quit using drugs before he can help you. Instead he can use talk therapy to begin the process of bringing you back down to reality, without any pressure.
        I say this as a recovering addict with a degree in psychology and someone diagnosed with borderline personality disorder [something people have theorized Mindy had for years].

      • Meredith says:

        The stigma is still there. I am a lawyer and have been let go or not had a contract renewed at jobs after I disclosed my depression. Once I was fired by the human rights officer at a social services agency. I don’t disclose now unless I’m past the probationary period. Then I’m safe. Pretty sad.

      • gg says:

        I went to a shrink for severe depression and my employer found out and sacked me. Employers don’t care why you are going to a shrink, they just consider you a risk and want you out. They only want healthy, single-minded robots, not human beings, at MOST (but thankfully not all) places.

      • some bitch says:

        Thanks for sharing your experiences vvvoid, Meredith and gg. I’ve struggled with depression and it’s something I wouldn’t wish on anybody. It can be debilitating and I feel like I lost two years of my life due to depression. There definitely is still a stigma attached to mental illness and addiction and it impedes people from getting help when they need it, and also harms people living with and managing mental illness.

        I live in Canada, and both the ability to access and the quality of mental health care (especially long term) must be addressed now. Society’s attitudes regarding mental health and addiction are something that will hopefully continue to evolve.

    • Greenie Djinn says:

      If anyone wants to do some finger-pointing, please read up on “SSRI suicide”.

      The mental health professions are prescribing SSRI anti-depressants like candy. The particulars of the case fit other SSRI suicide/murders. If she was on SSRI’s then there is a fair chance that’s what caused the suicide and the ‘shooting the dog’ aspect. It could have been worse if the children had been at home. The presence of a gun wouldn’t have made a difference, like that lady in Texas that drove into a lake with the children in her car.

      Also, two weird things came up:
      1. A website claiming she had been treated by Dr. Pinsky happened to mention that five of his patients have likewise committed suicide.
      2. This is the second self-inflicted shooting in the same neighborhood. The sheriff’s website lists a suicide at the same street but the house number is not mentioned. It happened on Sunday 13th, so it’s not the May suicide of her significant other. The person’s name is not mentioned.

      • shady says:

        Joey Kovar and Mike Starr, both from her season of Celebrity rehab died in the last two years, but they weren’t ruled suicides, I think they were accidental overdoses.

  17. Miss so and so says:

    This is beyond sad. The thing is she has been a hot mess for a long time. She either didn’t get help or refused it. The fact is that no matter how much you want to help someone THEY have to want it or it is useless.

    As to how she got a gun in her state. The chances are that it isn’t her gun, meaning she didn’t buy it. Guns are common… and before you all start in with the take all guns away… she was going to kill herself one way or another.

  18. the original bellaluna says:

    So, SO sad. Those poor little boys. Mindy, RIP.

  19. cw says:

    Was she under investigation for the death of him? I thought she was
    they have to know – it’s easy to tell if he shot himself or some else did

  20. Lisa says:

    How sad for those kids. The baby has no living parents. Anyone know about the father of the older child? What a mess.

    • Miss so and so says:

      The father of the older one was just on the Today show. He seems normal I am not sure how much he was involved in his life. He did say that he hoped the two boys would be raised together

      • Lisa says:

        Thanks, wonder why older child was put in foster care if bio dad could step in?

      • Elo says:

        I believe that he was the one that beat her up really bad and almost killed her about 5 years back. I think that is why her parents have the child. What a tragedy.

      • Hakura says:

        @Elo – God, these kids just can’t win, can they? =( They certainly didn’t hit the parental lottery…

  21. DIANE says:

    When I saw the headline this morning, I thought, well, she finally did it. We’ve all been watching her self-destruct for the last 20 years. I feel bad for the dog.

  22. Lolly says:

    I can’t believe she was so young. I absolutely loved her song “Oh Romeo” when I was a kid, I still have it on my ipod.. I hope she’s found peace. RIP Mindy

  23. KMB says:

    I am a longtime lurker to this site but felt compelled to comment on this story. Mindy must have been suffering terribly, and her children will only suffer further. I agree with other commenters that she may have been suffering from postpartum depression or psychosis. Other illnesses such as bipolar can also be worsened by having children (as in my case).

    I suffer from treatment-resistant bipolar II disorder so I know how difficult a situation like this can be. Even using prescription medication as given by your doctor can react badly if it is not the right one for you. Alcohol, drugs, celebrity, and exploitation could not have made things better.

    Mindy McCready should have sought reputable therapeutic help. She should not have shot her dog. She should not have abandoned her children. But she was ill. I feel a lot of sympathy for her and for her family left behind.

    Also there are no words to describe my hatred for Dr. Drew.

  24. Miss You Enclave24 says:

    She was so tragic

  25. Shelly says:

    I felt really sad when I heard this news last night. I was never a fan of her music, but I saw an interview with her once years ago, and she seemed like a lost soul in a huge amount of pain and just deeply vulnerable. I used to volunteer for a suicide hotline, and let me just say that her also killing her dog is not that unusual. I had a caller once who specifically told me that he was also going to have to shoot his dog before he shot himself, because he said there would be no one to look after his dog after he was gone, and he felt it was the the only option to ensure nothing awful happened to his dog. It sounds terrible to the rest of us, but in the depths of their misery, it makes perfect sense to them. We were able to get help sent to this gentleman, so none of that happened, but a person who is suicidal is not thinking like a person who’s not.

    • Hakura says:

      I can’t express how much I admire your taking on something so difficult & emotionally draining, purely in an attempt to help someone (& not even being paid to do it, giving your time on top of everything else).

      I just can’t see how some people are able to do it (work a suicide hotline). It’s constant angst & a huge weight/pressure on your shoulders trying to speak to someone in that state. There’s got to be a -lot- riding on you, every time.

      But major kudos to you, for everything you did while volunteering. =)

  26. poppy says:

    so tragic. abuse, fame and fortune and addiction. we see a lot of that, we can’t and won’t look away, like a terrible accident that is about to happen or is happening in slow motion. it isn’t a surprise but tragic nonetheless.
    wondering if she wasn’t surrounded by yes men and the hangers on if something more could have been done for her or by her. maybe she would have hit rock bottom sooner. maybe had some tough love straight away and spent less of her life in a downward spiral she could have turned it around? infuriating to think of all the enablers riding the gravy train. awful.

    sad to think about the babies she left behind. praying for them both.

  27. poppy says:

    crimes of the heart is a play that became a movie where the mother hung herself with her cat in the basement. she was scared to die alone so she hung the cat. apparently not uncommon. pitiful.

  28. fabgrrl says:

    Sad about the dog, but at least she didn’t take her kids with her, which seems to happen all too often when parents commit suicide. That, or leaving the child/ren alone for someone else to *hopefully* find (happened to a friend of mine at 6 years old). Geh!

  29. Leigh_S says:

    For those who ‘don’t get’ her behavior regarding the self-care, child care and taking the dog with her, they are CLASSIC signs of major depression.

    I’ve been to many of these depths, still suffer occasional bouts and constant (treated) anxiety. The stigma of mental illness is very, very real. Letting an employer know you suffer from depression or similar mental illness gets you labelled as weak, unreliable, delicate, unable to cut it and many other career limiting (or eliminating) labels that would never be applied to someone with a non-visible illness like diabetes, asthma or heart problems.

    Deep major depression is paralysing, and it feeds on itself.

    Nothing you do is right, so you do nothing and feel worse because you are useless. You look at the world through an invisible wall of pain, disconnected and locked in your head. Your body is a robot that you aren’t even able to work correctly as you look through its/your eyes.

    You can’t see an end to the pain, mental and physical. Every minute of everyday is a struggle, a performance of normalacy and you are EXHAUSTED. Words of encouragement are like a rope that floats in and out of reach while you are too tired to care about grabbing on.

    You look at those you love and hate yourself for letting them down, understanding the burden you are to them all. You look at your animals you know what will happen to them when you are gone … they will end up put down. You take care of them until your last shred and then?

    • MacScore says:

      Oh Leigh, my heart really goes out to you. One of the worst parts of depression – as it seems to be in your case – is also having the clarity to see and describe what is happening, but still being powerless to change it. I do hope that you have loving and supporting friends and family around you. I hope you will experience joy again.

      • Leigh_S says:

        Happily, I’m not in that place now but the experience never fully leaves you and never stays gone forever. I have the gift(?) curse(?) of being able to build a picture of it from the inside out and hoped in this case it might help people see Mindy’s actions with a little more kindness.

        Even an animal will chew its leg off to escape a trap. How do you escape the trap when it is inside your skull???

    • vvvoid says:

      Expertly put, Leigh.
      It’s something I struggle with too. My depression is the result of borderline pd, but it’s the same nightmare.
      It’s not something anyone who hasn’t experienced it can truly understand. It’s an abyss of abject misery for no particular reason. If you can’t figure out WHY you feel the way you feel, it’s so hard to go about fixing it. And more often than not, there is no specific why. It’s biological.

    • Erinn says:

      I know how you feel. I was diagnosed with clinical depression three years ago. All I wanted to do for quite some time was sleep, and cry. I still go through the occasional bout of that. I’m my own worst critic… and I constantly feel like I let others down because of it. It’s an awful feeling, and it really does feed on itself.

      I’ve been a lot better in generally, but I still have a major anxiety issue. On the bright side, the days where all I want to do is sleep and cry have dropped significantly.

    • the original bellaluna says:

      I have no words…so thank you for articulating so well.

    • I Choose Me says:

      Thanks for sharing your story Leigh. It really puts things in perspective for me.

    • Mrs.Stan Smith says:

      That was a terrific post Leigh_S and I understood everything you said.I suffer from p.t.s.d,clinical depression,panic disorder and have tried to take my own life dozens of times.I have not tried to kill myself in over 10 years but as a suicide survivor I can tell you that everything you wrote described how I felt too.Suicidal depression is an awful thing to go throguh but you can’t really explain it to people who haven’t gone through it.I have bad days but for the most part I am lot better now and I hope you also found the right therapist and medication and are doing okay.

    • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

      Pretty much. I have BP, so I’ve been there and to other, um, ‘interesting’ places. People say they won’t judge you but they do, which is unavoidable but they also punish you for it. It does rather feel like you’re getting the ‘are you on your period’-style treatment pretty frequently from people who do know. Also, that your concerns or what-have-you aren’t valid because they’re just the rantings of a sick person. That’s frustrating, to have EVERYTHING about you viewed as unreliable, you know, until it’s convenient for people not to do that.

    • Hakura says:

      @Leigh – I literally got goosebumps reading your post. You described, in every way, how I feel with my own depression. Every last symptom mentioned feels like it was *me* listing my own experiences.

      I was diagnosed w/severe depression this last year, even though I know I’ve been suffering the symptoms for 10 years. I’ve never talked about this before, bc I’m so ashamed of it, but… I’m 26, but my life seemed to just *stop* after high-school. I’ve struggled to make myself get up & do what I need to, learn to drive, get a job. But it becomes so overwhelming so fast, you feel intimidated & give up.

      I’m finally being treated, & think I may have found a med that helps. Truly hoping. I don’t wish this on anyone. It’s hard to even talk about, but it is what it is.

      Although I’ve never been suicidal, it’s not at all hard to understand how Mindy could have reached that point. The intense painful depression can drag you under, even for no particular reason.

  30. Barb says:

    “RIP Mindy. This is sad and useless, but it particularly bothers me that she shot her dog. She must have been in a very deep dark place to have gone through with that. I hope her kids are ok and are being well cared for by their grandparents.” – Yes, CB. Agreed 100%.

  31. LeeLoo says:

    This is so sad. Mindy obviously suffered from mental health woes for quite some time. While I understand what it is like to be in a dark hole that is difficult to get out of, it was a very selfish decision on her part. Her kids are now going to grow up without a mother and a father. It’s just sad all around. I feel for those kids and I hope they are in a safe place.

  32. aims says:

    Mindy was a very sick, disturbed women. She was on a crazy path. She was destructive to herself and to those associated with her. As a mom, my worst fear is to leave my kids prematurely. Im not depressed, and so I don’t share her mindset. But, the real victims here are those boys. They were born into an insane environment, and they’re the real ones who are going to need a lot if care and guidance. Particularly the youngest, it seems that both his parents had mental health issues.

  33. apsutter says:

    Wow this is so sad. She was big in the 90’s when I was young and my mom and I listened to country music together. It’s terrible when a person can’t seem to get out from under their demons. RIP Mindy

  34. Madriani's Girl says:

    This just makes me so sad. This poor woman was so troubled. RIP, Mindy.

  35. palermo says:

    Wasn’t she considered a possible suspect in the death of her fiance’, an alleged suicide? Maybe she killed him, we will never know now. She hasn’t been in her right mind in years. Hate to say it but her kids are probably going to have a calmer life without her. I hate that she shot the innocent dog.

  36. Kim says:

    Mental illness is just as bad as physical illness.There is no difference between cancer and depression.If untreated both can be fatal RIP Mindy all the other Mindys who feel there is no hope.

    • jwoolman says:

      Mental illness actually is physical illness. It just has a direct effect on behavior because that’s what happens when the brain is the affected organ. We’re still in a very primitive stage of understanding and treating mental illness and so it seems different from other physical illnesses- but basically it’s not. We just know a lot more about setting broken legs than fixing physical and chemical processes in the brain that are out of kilter. Nobody gets blamed for not being able to walk on a broken leg, though.

  37. snark says:

    I wonder if she was on antidepressants at the time. They can be horrible for bipolar people…these are the ones who often get suicidal after being on them. They do not work well (or at all) for people with this disorder many times, and can REALLY make things worse. Mindy was allegedly abused as a child, and then by Roger Clemens at age 15 (who has an affair with a 15 year-old?!) It really effed her up royally, and she spent the rest of her life trying to medicate away the pain. In doing so, she messed up other things in her life, so it became a vicious cycle. More mistakes, more medicating. So very sad all around.

  38. Agnes says:

    I’m so sad for her babies. Terrible.

  39. Dawn says:

    This is so sad. I don’t know much about her music but I have heard about her life for some time now. She has been very messed up for sometime. My co-worker just said to chalk this up to yet one more failure of Dr. Drew. I didn’t know she was on his show but I do know I don’t like him. Thankfully someone had the sense to take her children.

  40. Onyx XV says:

    How selfish.

    • michele123 says:

      Damn – do you know nothing of depression? You think this is selfishness? This is despair and I hope you never feel it. I hope nobody has to feel it and if someone does I pray that someone can be there to help them through it.

  41. KellyinSeattle says:

    As someone who struggles (since age 15 and I’m now 44) with very, very severe depression (ECT treatments included), if a person is severely depressed, they cannot see a way out…Just like one cannot fathom what it’s like to be depressed when one isn’t, it’s impossible for a depressed person imagining feeling well….I made a pact with myself and God since I had a son to never, ever, resort to that no matter what…it’s a tragedy.

    • Amanda_SB says:

      Kelly,

      As someone who has also suffered from life-long severe depression, I completely relate to what you are saying. I don’t have kids, a husband or pets, so I have to take it day-by-day. Unless you have experienced severe depression (and in my case, also a “mood disorder,” as my Dr refers to it), you have no idea the depths of despair that someone suffering from this goes through. Stay strong, and if you can’t do it for yourself, do it for your son. My parents are the only thing that have kept me going.

      • KellyinSeattle says:

        Yes, I can relate; mine is a unipolar mood disorder and keep on trying, Amanda. I’m a school teacher and can’t teach because I have to have electro-shock treatment so often. It’s definitely very disabiling and has a lot of stigma to it…..

  42. Happy21 says:

    I find this so incredibly sad I just can’t say anything more than that. Mental illness is awful :'(

  43. Shira says:

    I have no idea who she is but am just so pissed off she shot the dog. Why the hell?!?!?!?!

  44. LittleMissy says:

    Killing her dog seems an act of evil to me

  45. jwoolman says:

    It was so lucky that her children weren’t there. Suicidal parents too often decide to kill their children as well, as an extension of themselves, hence killing the dog as a substitute child. Men seem especially likely to also kill their wives along with the kids before killing themselves, but this does raise some questions about the unresolved “suicide” of her younger child’s father. Did she have a rock solid alibi at the time he died?

  46. d says:

    Very sad. What a downward spiral she was in; it really did seem like it was only a matter of time, unfortunately.
    I think she did kill her boyfriend, in some kind of haze and the knowledge of it and knowing she’d be found out tipped her over the edge. That the end was coming – prison, no more drugs, etc. AND maybe she’d have to face her demons while in prison – I think it was too much for her. I think she just gave up. Very sad, she had such a terrible life, severe problems that I wish she would have gotten help for.
    I agree with what people here are saying about depression. I had a friend kill himself and I think he was also in that mindset of thinking that killing himself was a very rational thing to do, the only thing to do, never mind that he had kids (who would never know how much he was suffering) and that his friends would miss him. Ug.
    IDK. I guess at least she’s not suffering anymore. That was always evident to me…she was a tortured, suffering soul doing terrible things to herself and other people. And yes, addiction makes you a monster too sometimes. Blah.
    I hope those kids get proper care and are brought up in a good environment now.

  47. squirrelbait says:

    when i read about this last night, it made my eyes well up with tears. not to get all AA on y’all but addiction really does lead to jails, institutions and death, compounded with mental illness is a dual diagnosis that sadly many cannot overcome. please do not think i am coming from a place of judgement but rather first hand experience. even though i am coming up on 7 years sobriety there are days when my depression rears it’s head and i feel just as dark and lost as i did when i was using. my depression is something i’ve fought since i was a child and will have to fight probably my entire life. it is so sad when someone gets to the point where they just give up because drugs can no longer kill the pain and has just pretty much killed their soul. i’ve lost many people this way in my life and it really is a wound that never heals. sad situation all around.

    as for dr. drew…i have mixed feelings on him. i read a lot of hate for him on the gossip blogs, but it is true there is still much stigma attached to mental illness. i was in rehab many many times before getting clean and he was my doc at one point. it was before all the tv stuff it was back when he was just the head addiction doc at a local facility. he was good, didn’t bullshit and helped me a lot. i admit it makes me cringe to see his hln show, he comes across as very opportunist. eh…who knows! not my place to judge 🙂

    • Melissa says:

      I’m glad to hear that you had a generally positive experience with Dr. Drew. I’ve always liked him because he seems so straightforward and like he has a true understanding of addiction. As someone who has watched the disease of alcoholism rip through my dad’s side of the family until there was literally only a few people left (my father, both of his parents, one of my cousins and an uncle all succumbed eventually to alcoholism-related heart attacks, cancer, alcohol poisoning, etc) I fully understand that once the disease sinks it’s teeth into you, the majority of people don’t make it out. Even with rehab, most relapse and it isn’t their physician’s fault. I’m glad you sought treatment and pray for continued strength!

  48. janie says:

    So sad.

  49. ramie says:

    Sad for the kids. But they will probably be better off cared for by family members.

  50. snark says:

    I’ve posted this on other threads when we’ve been talking about depression, and I’m not going to tell my story here-it’s similar to many above (strength and solidarity, ladies!!). The thing that actually HELPED me after many different antidepressants didn’t, was a smart therapist who tried lightbox therapy. It’s a Vitamin D giver, and it worked. I then began 10,000 IU a day of Vitamin D3 and in 3 years have not had one more day of depression. PLEASE, please, if you are not having success with antidepressants, or, like me are bipolar and they actually make you worse, give it a try. It will not hurt you, it is good for your heart and studies are coming out about it’s cancer-preventative abilities. It was nothing short of a miracle for me, and I, like many of you, had struggled for decades. I cannot recommend it highly enough.

    • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

      I use one and…I’m glad it’s working for you. I’ll still have faith, as it’s a tool in an arsenal and nothing is lost by not using it.

      • snark says:

        I feel like because taking the D3 supplements is easier than sitting in front of the box every day, compliance is more likely. I did both for quite awhile, then just stayed with the D3 supplements. I do try to get at least 15 min or so a day of sun if at all possible. Discovering the lightbox and Vitamin D was a lifesaver for me and I hope you find success on your journey 🙂

    • Cirque28 says:

      Thank you for bringing this up. You inspired me to dig my light box out and start using it again! I know this won’t be the answer for everyone, but people who are struggling owe it to themselves to just give these simple, relatively inexpensive methods a shot. It’s amazing how much better some of us will feel by taking Vitamin D, fish oil, getting enough sleep, light, exercise, good food, etc.

  51. F5 says:

    Dr. Drew strikes again, man is friggin Grim Reaper..

  52. Stacia says:

    She shot her dog(RIP poor lil buddy)…which means that if her kids would have been there with her she may have killed them too. So now one of her kids is motherless and the other has no parents. I find that selfish.

    • Jo 'Mama' Besser says:

      Before I had a closer understanding of mental illness, I would have reacted that way. Now my scope of perspective is drastically broader and it’s just not that simple. It’s not. I’m not saying it’s noble or the right thing to do, but there’s more going on than just ‘selfishness’. And remember that an ill mind isn’t going to come to the same conclusions.

  53. Andrea says:

    Some of these comments disgust me above. Clearly the general public does not understand mental illness and maybe every school should teach it (the warning signs etc). The US is sadly far behind on taking care of mental illness and until we do a major overhaul more suicides and mass shootings will occur. May Mindy rest in Peace finally. I always loved her music.

    • LeeLoo says:

      What I think is the worst part is that no one was there to actually get her the help she needed. Despite all I know about mental illness and having dealt with addiction and depression myself I always was able to recognize when things were going downhill quickly and I needed more help. The fact that Mindy was so far gone that she couldn’t care for herself and didn’t have anyone around to tell her she needed more help than what she was getting is disturbing. I also feel it was negligent of the treatment facility to cut her loose after 2 days. I still think it was a selfish move on her part, I can’t imagine being so depressed and suicidal that I wouldn’t imagine the devastating effect it had on my kids (if I had any) or the rest of the family. I just can’t empathize with that. Although I’m sure many people can.

  54. Patrice says:

    PHD Gossip: That comment was absurd and a perfect example one of the biggest problems within American society today: Always blaming one’s own personal problems and actions on others totally forgoing taking any personal responsibility for the ways in which we CHOOSE, as adults. to live our own lives.

    Mindy had many skeletons in her closet and demons in her life long before Roger Clemens ever came along. How anyone can place blame on someone else for another person’s suicide is mind boggling to me, nevermind when the recently deceased was in their 40s and had lived a whole life full of ups & downs since her teenage years.

    The thing about the dog infuriates me-she could have taken him to a shelter, given him to a friend, anything else-but I hope Mindy has finally found the peace now that for whatever reasons, she couldn’t in life. My heart breaks for her little boys 🙁 RIP Mindy. What a tragic end.

    • DGO says:

      She was only 15 when Roger Clemens came along. He was a grown man with a wife and children. He had no business getting with her in the first place. If she already had problems prior to him coming into her life, he compounded them.

  55. Dana says:

    Does anyone know why the father didn’t have custody of the older son she was abusive toward? Is he a druggie too?

  56. skuddles says:

    I was shocked and saddened to hear this news as well, but then I began doing a lot of reading and realized MM was a very angry, destructive, and selfish woman. Investigators have never fully concluded exactly what transpired when her BF David Wilson died of a gunshot wound just one month prior. Speculation is that he killed himself, yet the investigation remains open. There are rumors MM suspected him of cheating on her. I find it rather suspect that she killed herself only one month later. Guilt? Fear of being found out and having to spend the rest of her life in jail?

    Shooting the dog was just vile and unnecessary. And really makes me wonder if she would not have shot the children too had they been present. According to her father, who was well acquainted with her emotional state this past while, she was very verbally abusive to the oldest son. Thankfully, he had been taken away just days earlier when she was forced to go into rehab.

    • kitkerenina says:

      Wondering that myself. She was under investigation by authorities, and was called out for claiming boyfriend’s death a suicide too soon, at least to my understanding.

  57. stinkyman says:

    Tragic. Maybe my imagination is working overtime but I wonder if either of these (David Wilson’s as well) are suicides at all. The fact that she would kill her dog is hard to believe let alone leave her kids motherless. Maybe both these people were murdered over some drug or revenge thing that we will never learn about.

  58. Melissa says:

    I think it is ignorant to blame Dr Drew for this tragedy, and its a shame that so many people are doing so. The unfortunate truth is that a shockingly high percentage of addicts (even those who have sought treatment at some point) relapse and even eventually die from causes relating to their addiction/mental illness. As far as post-rehab death statistics go, Dr Drew’s patients fall into some sadly very normal statistics. All he can do is help those who have the desire and/or capacity to help themselves. Besides trying to help the addicts themselves, he brings awareness of the harsh realities of the issue to the public so people can understand what their friends and family members go through when trying to kick an addiction, and maybe even convince a few not to get themselves into that lifestyle in the first place.

    • Cirque28 says:

      Yes. I’m not pro-Drew or anti-Drew but I don’t think it’s correct to say all of these untimely deaths are his fault. Did going on Celebrity Rehab help Mindy or hurt her? Who knows?

      A friend has been to rehab several times and he’s lost so many rehab pals to overdoses and suicides. He says sometimes the people you meet in rehab get out and die while you’re still there, e.g.: someone will say, “Did you know Gary passed away?” and you think, “But he just got out on Friday!” It’s a sad reality. Many addicts won’t even see their middle years, much less old age.

    • squirrelbait says:

      ^^^^^
      this is sad but a completely true fact of recovery.

  59. Bird says:

    I just want to give you all a big hug – your words have truly touched me.

  60. God Rest Your Soul Mindy says:

    God rest your soul Mindy and God protect your children.

  61. JL says:

    So sad, that little baby will never know his parents and the older one will have painful memeories.

    Dina Lohan, take note – Jamie Spears, count your blessings for having commonsense.