A very pregnant Busy Philipps appeared on internet talkshow The Conversation, hosted by British photographer Amanda de Cadenet. It was just a five minute interview, but Busy, 33, really got candid and detailed. I have to watch more of these interviews with de Cadenet, she asks very personal questions and in Busy’s case she got very personal answers. I’ve always been fond of Busy, and she just confirmed it with this awesome interview.
On if she waxes or shaves
I love this question. I do get waxed, but after I had my daughter I had this real epiphany. I felt like it would be really f–king weird if I had no hair on my vagina, because I have a little girl and I want her to look at me and think that grown women have hair on their vaginas!On being asked to lose weight for an acting job
I was asked to lose weight by a network for a TV pilot. The conversation happens because you get a job and your agent or manager calls and they say, ‘They are so excited about you. They just think there is no one better for this part and they want you to look and feel your best — they really feel that that could include losing 15 or 20 pounds.You take a beat. I think I was a little crushed. I want to say that I was like 24 when that happened.
On body image
I feel like it’s the last frontier of feminism – the weight thing with women – even for myself. I identify as a feminist. I have so many feminist beliefs – and then I’m so mean to myself about my body sometimes. Or I can be judgmental about other people for their bodies, and I don’t know how to get over it.You will never see my ‘body after baby’ spread. I think it’s disgusting. I think it sends such a terrible message.
[From The Conversation via US Magazine]
On the issue of whether she waxes or shaves, kids don’t really pay that much attention to it, do they? To me it’s a personal choice and I can’t imagine it having anything to do with my kid. It just seems bizarre to take a stand on that for a daughter, but I don’t have a little girl so I have no idea. Busy has daughter Birdie, four and a half, with her husband, Marc Silverstein, and is expecting another girl.
I really like what she said about body image and being gentle on yourself. It’s true and it’s a hard thing to get past. It doesn’t seem to matter what you tell yourself about it, it’s hard not to beat yourself up.
Here’s Busy out in West Hollywood on Wednesday. A site posted just a photo of her baby bump with a “guess who” and I thought she was Jessica Simpson at first. She looks ready to have that baby!
Photo credit: FameFlynet, WENN.com and Instagram
She seems cool. And yeah, I remember being a little girl and knowing Mommy had hair there, and that she was a woman and I was a little girl. It differentiated us. She’s rigt.
+1
i do not understand why women want to look prepubescent.
full respect for her for realizing this and doing something about it now.
🙂 go busy.
Though I don’t think waxing means you want to look prepubescent, I do think society’s concentration on female grooming has gone overboard.
It is such a slippery fvcking slope. I honestly hope I’m dead by the time it becomes the norm for all women to have vajeuvenation surgery to “tighten things up” once they decide they are done having kids. Because trust me, that day is coming.
I mean, where does it end? Women have to be hairless. Perfectly skinny. Can’t gain weight after pregnancy, hell, judging by the awful comments concerning Kim K’s and J. Simpson’s appearance, can’t gain weight DURING pregnancy. Have to have perfectly long hair. Perfectly sized boobs and butt.
It’s insane. Absolutely insane. I for one refuse to play. And if I ever have a daughter, I’m going to make sure to impress upon her that she doesn’t have to play either.
I didn’t know that removing pubic hair makes a grown woman revert back to a child. Bye hips, bye height, bye breasts etc…
It’s the same debate for who are ‘real women’ and who are not based on stupid things like size of breasts, clothing, eating patterns… and now pubic hair to decide who is an ‘adult female’. For pete’s sake!
This notion is so ridiculous. Nobody can see you down there besides your partner (and children maybe). I don’t understand the big deal about, to make such scathing comments about an area covered in two layers of clothing and never seen in public. It’s shaming a woman for making a personal choice and it’s shaming men who have no problems with it or who prefer it as to say they are attracted to children which shames the female partner too btw.
It’s an individual choice and for a feminist like Philipps to make a comment, that is starting to become the ‘norm’ in society, baffles me. The norm changes all the time just like an individual’s preference. Too bad that the internet makes the norm spread faster and shame people for not following it or thinking they are cooler, better or more mature by following it and letting everybody know. Nobody gets hurt by a hairless vagina or a 70s bush vagina so what’s the fuss???
Speaking entirely for myself here, I stay completely bare down there because I prefer the look. I think it looks nicer (both naked and clothed) and I prefer the sensation of nada fuzz during sex. Ehh, to each their own…
@Latisse: Agree.
I think women can make their own choices about how they want their pubic hair, breasts, underarm hair, etc. I have never waxed and never will, but groom. BUT, I find the larger and much more disturbing issue to be the very very high number of younger men (18-25) that would refuse to have sex with a woman with pubic hair. I was just reading about this topic yesterday on either Gawker or Jezebel. That is scary…if a new generation of young men are only wanting women’s vaginas to appear one way – all bare.
Ya I remember noticing that about my mother when I was a little girl too. I also remember being very young and pointing out the differences in my chest compared to my mother’s!
I simply wax my bikini zone not everything. I look manicured but not 12.
Agree – take off just enough so you don’t have hair peeking out of your bathing suit, bikini or one piece. That’s all. That hair is there for a purpose, to protect your tender skin from chafing on underwear or jeans that are tight.
Two stupid arguments.
Ok, I’ve done the wax thing from an airstrip to the whole brazilian it’s all gone. Normally I have it done when it’s beach time so nothing is peaking out and doesn’t look “bin ladenish” down there. But having done this for a few years now, I’ve come to the conclusion that there are 2 things why hair down there is important…
1. It controls the direction of your pee (true story)
2. It provides a cushion when you jump into the ocean from a cliff and it won’t hurt much.
I know i know… my post may sound stupid but it’s true. 🙂
My mother having pubic hair helped me understand that I too would grow pubic hair, and that it’s ok. We’re designing a culture of 12 year olds who want waxing and laser, and men who think pubic hair is “disgusting”. A woman who is removing pubic hair for her own reasons is something I could not care less about. A woman feeling pressured to remove her hair, or a young girl feeling “dirty” by her pubic hair is another issue.
I agree.
I have a 4 month old girl and the thought of her growing up feeling ashamed or disgusted by the fact that she has hair freaks me out.
Ahhh!!! I’m right there with her and her vajay…
I have a daughter approaching puberty and have never given a thought at all about my “personal grooming” – until I realized she’s going to have hair there soon and I don’t want her to feel like it’s a weird thing to have. I would hate for her to feel ashamed of her body’s natural state. So I gave it up, too. Solidarity and whatnot, lol!
That was my thought also. I remember going through puberty and all the weird changes to my body and not knowing what was normal and what wasn’t. It would’ve freaked me out if I hadn’t known what to expect.
I have a four year old and try to be careful about the things she sees mommy do. I ditched the thongs for bikini briefs and I don’t overly manicure myself down there. For me, it’s more about trying to preserve her childhood. We don’t do bratz dolls either, I just don’t want her to feel pressure to be sexual too soon. It’s just my own little battle against the tide.
I don’t have daughters but I think that’s a smart decision. Puberty is hard enough…so to feel that the hair that’s sprouting is somehow unattractive would just add to the angst, I’d think.
Just this morning she teared up about growing up & her body changing – she’s only 10! But it’s a big deal and confusing even though we’re really open. I would never want her to feel that how she is naturally isn’t absolutely perfect!
I will never forget that the day of my first period happened on a very historic day….and I could not get my mom away from the TV. I was embarrassed and in meltdown mode. My big sister figured it out and got the situation under control. Thank God for big sisters. Sometimes!
Why would her daughter know or care about this?
So her daughter doesn’t have to feel insecure about every little thing and feel like she has to wax everything the minute she gets hair there.
Why would she know ? because when they are little, kids see their parents naked, either in the bathroom or in the dressing room. My kid saw me and sought it was poop, and I said no, it’s hairs !
Why would she care ? because her mother will be her very first image and example of a woman… so she will build her idea of what a woman is arround that, and more after, but this, first
I approve 200%. I am one who just trim the lenght, no shave, no wax. I don’t want to look like a kid, and it fuc’ing hurts, man !
My man just have to live with it and I think he is really OK
I agree with you. Kids totally notice these things and I also think it’s a bizarre message to send to little girls about a woman’s body. Plus, for those who say your kids don’t need to see you naked – unless you have a nanny those kids are totally going to see you naked. I try to keep mine out of the bathroom but it’s almost a guarantee that a crisis will arise when I’m in or getting out of the shower!
LOL at the poop comment. I can believe it. When I was a teenager, before I stated shaving, my little cousin walked in on me in the bathroom and said, “Eww, your butt is black!” I explained to her that it wasn’t actually my butt, and it wasn’t really black either, and that Grandma’s bathroom door doesn’t lock, so it’s always a good idea to knock first.
I think the choice in and of itself isn’t a big deal, but it sounds like Busy’s decision is part of broader philosophy about healthy body image that she hopes to pass on to her daughters. Good for her!
(Anyone else remember when Amanda de Cadenet was married to John Taylor of Duran Duran? He was dreamy. Still is).
Simply put your daughter don’t have to see you naked. If she wants her to know grown women have hair on their vaginas she could just tell her. She could say that some women like mommy, likes to groom while others don’t, it’s a choice.
Plus by the time that girl starts to grow pubic hair she will most likely already know how it works.
Every kid sees their parents naked, especially when they’re young. My sister’s three year old is with her all the time. She sits and plays while my sister gets dressed, and yeah, sees her naked. It’s pretty normal.
I vividly remember seeing my mother’s hair. I was pretty much eye level with it tho I don’t remember the conversation. And my kid sees me naked all the time. I don’t know anybody whose child lets them pee in peace. We also shower together cuz im lazy like that lol.
The real issue I have is we are potty training now, and I’ve gone back to using pads during my cycle, and when she saw it she asked me if I pooped and I was like “Nooooooo, now she’s going to poop in her pants forEVA!”
It’s kind of unavoidable sometimes. I’m not saying I would ever walk around naked just for the sake of it when I have kids, but sometimes kid will walk into the bathroom on you…or what happens if you take them to a public pool. Lots of naked women there in the changing room.
Kids notice things like that. I remember asking my mom why she had hair “down there” and I didn’t. She said “because I’m a full grown woman and you’re still a little girl”. I also remember thinking that I couldn’t wait until I was a full grown woman so I could have hair there too. Kids do wonder about it.
Yeah, she’s cute and funny.
I’ve always thought it odd when woman go completely bare down there. The upkeep has to be exhausting and painful all to look like a prepubescent little girl. It always creeps me out when men prefer it that way too. Weird (>_<)
It’s not about the look, it’s about the feel – has nothing to do with looking “young” or like a kid – which is obviously disgusting. It’s just much, erm, more slippery in the nude.
Haha! Now that I get that 😉 Still wouldn’t commit to it full time though. Lord knows we have enough to pluck and shave without worrying about removing every last strand of hair in the nether regions.
ITA. The whole area is more sensitive. I do it because I am extremely hairy and things get really out of hand. My hair growth cycle is too fast and shaving became pointless and not to mention the hair bump that put me in the hospital. I leave a triangle or landing strip because the bald look is just too much. My skin and my husband appreciates the grooming.
@Snarky Why is it odd that some women perfer to be hair free down there? Is it odd that there are a few women in the world who likes to have a bald head? Maybe they just don’t like hair on certain parts of their bodies, it has nothing to do with trying to look like a little girl.
What if I thought it was odd that some women perfer to not mow the grass. That wouldn’t be very nice would it, it’s a personal grooming choice that’s all.
I personally felt much better when I started shaving, mainly because of issues related to menstruation. But to each her own. Doesn’t bother me.
Although I am a bit bothered that this seems to be a legitimate interview question!
I’m completely bare. I don’t do it to look prepubescent, and I don’t do it because I feel pressured by my man or porn. I personally like the way it feels. Plus, I like to have nothing in the way when my BF is, ahem, southbound.
That is the stupidest argument ever.
Children do not have breasts or hips or narrow waists. But apparently shaving their pubic hair makes adult females weird fetishists…
Do you shave your legs?
Why?
What about your armpits?
I always thought it was a stupid argument too. Having hair down there isn’t what separates you from being a child.
Agreed lex. It is ridiculous to think that one shaves or waxes to look prepubescent. It is a choice and everyone have their reasons.
I don’t think it’s odd to be bare down there, if that’s how you choose to be. Yes, the upkeep can be annoying, so that’s why I’m at the point now that being “bald down there” is now a special treat for my fiancé lol. Luckily I’m with a man who likes a nice lady garden haha :D. However, I find being bald really increases pleasure (especially for oral sex), so it’s a nice treat for MYSELF every once in a while as well. I think most grown men know they are looking at a WOMAN’S vagina when it’s bare as opposed to a little girl.
Anyway, I get what Busy Philipps is saying. My mom was and still is a nudist lol. I saw my parents naked as a child often, and yes, I think that’s a good thing – how else is a kid going to truly learn the differences between an adult’s and child’s body? My mom’s comfort with her own body and not being ashamed of being naked around her husband and kids really helped me to learn to be happy with my body as I became a woman.
I like it both ways, but never felt like a prepubescent girl when I shave/wax and have never done it because I want to look and feel like a prepubescent girl.
The first time I realized I was growing hair down there, I thought it was awesome. 😀 It made me realize I was becoming a woman.
It doesn’t bother me a lot if I’m not shaved/waxed all year long, but I do remove the hair often.
I do it because it makes me feel “cleaner”. I don’t mean for that to sound offensive and gross, but for me it’s more comfortable and fresher when the hair is off.
TMI, I know. But there you go.
Precisely – I started growing pubic and underarm hair a few months before I got my first period… It was very exciting as I knew I was growing up!
It’s funny how removing pubic hair is considered creepy by people who find completely normal to shave their armpits’ hair.
This said I also find that women grooming expectations are becoming far too demanding
I do think that it is important to set an example for your kids that makes them feel comfortable with their bodies. I never really considered this issue myself, as my daughter has many years left before puberty, but I remember when I got hair on my legs and wanted to start shaving and having that conversation with my mom. I’m not sure, but I don’t think the Brazilian was as big a “thing” then. I do, however, remember a girl in school who didn’t shave her legs at 11 who was getting made fun of horribly. I just don’t like the idea that little girls feel obligated to groom their body hair starting at such a young age; the more we can push back against that the better.
I like her and have since F&G. And I like that she speaks her truth to her situations. All around I think she is a good egg! Congrats on the new baby girl!
I love Freaks and Geeks, and I love the phrase “good egg” 🙂
Never mind.
yea, it’s weird. I’m all for trimming for hygiene purposes? But looking pre-pubescent is just twisted. Besides, a lot of the guys that go for that pr0n fantasy don’t necessarily manscape. I say: “try it on yourself first, see how you like it”. Especially when said hair starts growing back and gets itchy as hell.
That’s why you get laser hair removal. It doesn’t itch.
It is not about porn for me – I’ve always preferred it.
It has nothing to do with looking like a child… it seems you are the weird one.
I don’t see many children with fully formed woman breasts, do you?
I don’t believe women keep things bare down there for the purpose of looking prepubescent but you can bet the farm some men do like it because it has a bit of a taboo connotation. I think there is pressure to be bare from men and from society at large and that’s where Busy is coming from. I don’t think she thinks it’s bad or gross. She just feels she has a broader issue to address with her daughters.
Just becaus eI find it weird, doesn’t make me weird. But I guess you failed to grasp the real problem. How in our society women bare is so deeply rooted in p0rn and what it means for women.
Oh and BTW Lex, why are you going through this article attacking anyone and everyone that doesn’t quite agree with it? You posted the exact same thing on several posts already. We get it.
I LOVE Busy Phillips. So much to love on with her.
Unfortunately pubic hair on women (and men) is almost extinct and certaintly by the time her daughter grows up it will be more the norm to be hairless.
I, personally, miss the bush days. Infantile genitalia really disarms me. Even just a shaded triangle in front and everything else cleaned is more attractive to me than hairless.
I was married for a long time and somewhere in that marriage pubes became a thing of the past so that by the time I became single again and started dating I was completely SHOCKED to see nether regions bare!! I think it’s especially odd on men…hairless dongs just don’t seem sexy!!
🙂 I’m an old fashioned hair loving hussy I guess, and I’m a dying breed in my 30’s!
Hairless dongs, LOL! I couldn’t agree more. Hairless men skeeve me out!
Heh – quite the shock to reenter the dating pool!
But maybe Justin Theroux will change the hairless dong trend – check out the picture on the Justin post today. He’s showing off the hairy goods.
I’m not sure pubic hair is almost extinct. Waxing everything is more popular than before but I think there are way more people who keep their pubes. Pubed-folk just tend not to talk about it as much or take as many pictures of their bits..Not saying that everyone who waxes talks or takes pictures, but those who do talk and take pictures wax…
I’m with you on the hairless dongs, it creeps me out!
Pubic hair goes in and out of fashion all the time. It’s not like this is the first era of people who have gone bare. Cultures have been ridding themselves of all hair for centuries
My husban owns a very male-centric business and I’ve been privy to quite a few hairless find discussions. Apparently it makes the song appear larger, since the first few inches of the base aren’t obscured by a pube fro.
Damn, autocorrect butchered my post!
@mort I love that hair fro! 😉
I like Busy a lot.
The weight/acting thing was discussed on that actress panel yesterday too, I bet 90% of actresses have been told that, unfortunately.
When did it become appropriate or interesting to ask about someone’s personal grooming in an interview? Busy is a talented woman – is there nothing else better to ask her?
Ugh, agreed! It’s like the time the interviewer asked Hilary Clinton about her outfit. Luckily, Hilary slapped her down pretty quickly by saying, “Would you ask Harry Reid who he was wearing?!?” Still, though, I’m tired of women getting these bullshit non-sequiter questions, instead of ones that are actually apropos of what is actually the subject at hand.
I agree with you both (and Amy Tennant above.) Why is this being asked in so many interviews? Of both women and men?
Love Busy and totally agree with your comment.
The weirdest thing to me is how polarizing the To Shave or Not To Shave argument is.
I swear, it’s worse than politics.
Like who gives an eff what people do with their privates? Shag rug or hard wood floor-it’s a personal choice.
Why does one have to be *better* than the other? It always seems to generate so much outrage and defensiveness on either side of the fence.
I so agree with all of you. I don’t even know why this is a debate and why women have to choose a side.
I agree! I don’t put women down for having a bush or trimming or whatever. But when people start saying women look like prepubescent girls and men that are with them creeps it annoys me.
I absolutely don’t judge women who choose to wax (although one time I did go and unintentionally ended up completely bare and felt very odd, did not personally like it at all). I think how you choose to groom or not is no one’s business but your own. However, the problem I have is the expectation that women be hairless: legs, pits and now down South. I think there is a lot of pressure to conform to that, especially when many men have there first contact with the naked female form in porn films where things are waxed, bleached, enhanced, etc.
She’s awesome, would be a great friend I think. I get what she’s saying about body image, because I’ll catch myself doing the same thing. At times, the things I think about myself I would never say to or about anyone else.
I love her!
I really like her but I don’t think waxing has anything to do with her daughter. I grew up with my mom waxing and it never hit me like that? Like I never even really thought about it until I was older and asked her at like, 14, and she told me to do what I was comfortable with. I’m due with a girl in 3 months, and I wouldn’t stop waxing just because it’s a ‘good example.’ It’s all about preference.
I just hope her next daughter will have a normal name. But I like her, I do kind of think little kids wonder about stuff like that so..
I think it’s good for kids to have some idea of what’s normal, bodywise, in adults, in kids and how genders differ. I had a painful conversation once with Son Number Two when he was about three:
“I’ve got a willy so I’m a boy.” Yep.” “”Daddy’s got a willy so he’s a boy.” “Yep.” “My brother’s got a willy so he’s a boy.” “Yep.” “You haven’t got a willy so you’re a girl.” “Yep.”
This ended the list of people – three boys, one girl – he’d seen naked but he moved on regardless.
“Nanna’s got a willy so she’s a boy.” “No! Nanna is a girl! She hasn’t got a willy!” “Oh! So it’s not just you, then?” “No!” “Oh, I thought you were the only one.”
That kinda brought a tear to my eye. You’re the only girl in the world to your son. That is so lovely. I think maybe this is why we have kids..for special moments like that.
When I was 5 I drew a picture of the sun and it had glasses on it. Because my mom wore glasses.
When My daughter was 7 and started losing teeth she told me that she “saw” the tooth fairy and she was a beautiful fairy with red hair. Just like me.
Kids are awesome.
I hate to say it, but I think he was more along the lines of “Oh, my mother isn’t a weirdo mutant after all”!!
LOL!
That’s hysterical!
ha, little kids are unintentionally funny.
ITA with her about the constant judging of women, by the world, by each other. easy to beat yourself up and bash others. unfortunate.
as an aside, how is it even fair the older women get, the more hair they have and the opposite is true for men? smh.
Yes they pay attention!!! My niece who is 9 has seen me change. She went and told my mother that I don’t have any hair on my who ha and neither does her mother.
TMI!
TMI!!
TMI!!!
😯
Hair on the vulva, not hair in your vagina!
It’s never gonna catch on so don’t bother…
P.S. Maybe she does have a hairy vagina.. how would you know?
Lmao Lex
Poor woman…..that’s a VERY difficult region to wax!
It’s actually the mons pubis – but everyone refers to the entire female genital region as the vagina these days.
Always sort of annoys me – but you’re not gonna change people
It annoys me, too, but what are you going to do? I say pudenda, but I’m not sure that’s exactly right, either.
Yep pudenda is also correct. I remember (fondly) the days when nobody chatted about any of these regions on television.
Actually, it’s more precise to assert that pubic hair grows on the vulva, rather than just the mon pubis.
‘Vulva’ is more of an all encompassing term:” The vulva has many major and minor anatomical structures, including the labia majora, mons pubis, labia minora, clitoris, bulb of vestibule, vulval vestibule, greater and lesser vestibular glands, and the opening of the vagina.”
I know that people tend to use ‘vagina’ as short hand for all of the female genitalia but I always point out the misnomer. I mean, we give enough importance to male genetalia to consistently differentiate between the penis, the scrotum, the testes, etc; why do women’s bodies get the bumdeal?!
I don’t wax for anyone else but myself. I don’t even think of pre-pubescent children when i do, and i really don’t know how people made a connection to this although i understand it somewhat. I like how it feels, i like how it looks but yes, the upkeep is tiring.
Get laser (not IPL). It’s excellent.
Saving up the money!! Although to be honest, i switch back and forth between liking the hair and wanting to get rid of it altogether. If i do get laser, it would be for my armpits!
Well, it can be really weird if your body changes, especially if you’re mentally still a child. While I was in some ways quite precocious (like reading books for 14 year olds when I was 9) and also the first girl in my cirle of friends to get my period ect., I was not at all interested in things like boys, kissing, sex ect. It was definitely weird getting hair ect. I knew this meant that my body was changing from a girls body into a women’s body, but I feel like it could be even weirder if your mom didn’t have hair down there. I don’t say that women shouldn’t shave because of their daughters, but you probably should think about what your going to tell your daughter when she’s going trough those changes why you you shave down there and it might be difficult to explain to child while she should be ok with now having hair down there if you’re not ok with it.
Finally! This is awesome. She made the connection between the P&rn industry and the horrible trend of waxing off women’s pubic hair. The world is obsessed with exploiting women, the younger the better.
No pubic hair makes women look like weak little girls; we’re told to be as thin and small as possible like weak little girls, we should be painted in makeup to look like flawless plastic dolls, we should adopt small breathy voices to sound compliant and sweet, etc. Women are now afraid to breast feed because it might make their breasts sag (and everyone knows breasts are for men) some even have unnecessary c-sections for fear of stretching out down there (since even vaginas are made for mens’ pleasure).
Women wax themselves painfully and expensively “clean,” get breast implants, etc. but don’t realize it came from the p&rn industry, makeup companies, etc. exploiting women into thinking this is our main value and youth (weakness, inexperience, gullibility) is attractive in women.
People who claim they chose to wax themselves completely bare are deluding themselves into thinking it was their idea. Men who like that look give me the damn creeps, and some people would go so far to say that that preference reveals pedophile tendencies, but again, I just think they’ve been influenced by p&rn and the world obsession with keeping women small and weak and compliant and they’ve been trained, like women, to think that’s attractive.
And YES, little girls take all this in and YES it matters.
Really? I started shaving because I didn’t like getting hair caught in the adhesive of a pantyliner. X(
I kid. I actually think you make a really good point.
THANK YOU @RunsWithScissors! It NEVER, EVER in my life occurred to me to “groom” my pubic hair (just like it has never occurred to me to find a way to see up my nostrils and “groom” my nostril hairs . . . or my ear hair). I happened to see a few minutes of a show called “Wife Swap” featuring a wife from a very rural, wood-burning stove powered house family vs. a billionairess. Rural wife was shocked that all the billionairess did all day was essentially “work” on her appearance. However – we’ve invented so many necessary tasks that women must do to look good that it IS a fulltime job to do them all.
well stated & agree. both my son & daughter showered with me when they were toddlers. my parents especially my mom raised me unintended to be ashamed of my body (because of her strict religious upbringing) & I wanted nothing like what I experience for my two children but for them to love their bodies.
I disagree completely. I had never seen porn or the “ideals” when i started removing body hair and my mom is a hippie-rarely even shaves her legs to this day. I can’t stand the feel of body hair-even though it’s completely light on me, I still shave/wax my body and have since a teen. I am fully a woman.
I don’t find youth/teenagers attractive/sexy. They look unfinished. I don’t buy into the rhetoric that we get pushed into being little girls and meant to seem weak.
But that’s your opinion.
Enough is enough, seriously. I wouldn’t make any nasty comments about anyone with a 70s style bush, so I expect a “live and let live” attitude when if comes to my hygiene choices, but perhaps that’s asking too much. I like the feeling of being bare. I did it before I ever had a BF or ever watched porn. I’m not deluding myseld at all about this–I did it because *I* wanted to, thankyouverymuch. I live in the Southern US, where I’ve been able to wear shorts on Christmas Eve and summers are downright boiling. I feel that being bare is more hygienic, and I like the way my underwear/bathing suits look.
Furthermore, I completely disagree with your comments on men either having pedophile-like preferences or wanting to keep women small and weak. My BF is almost as big of a feminist as I am. He could give a shit if I am rocking a bush or bald. He lets me think for myself and has NEVER made a comment on my pubes either way. I get it if you like a certain look, but don’t put others down for their preferences. You’re trying to make women feel ashamed of their preferences, and it’s not cool.
That’s a myth – that its good hygiene to shave – its actually the opposite -I suspect you are American? Yanks seem a lot more worried about ( and rude about) hygiene than Europeans – in fact the shaven porn look came from America, Euro porn was still relatively hairy for a while
@Georgina: I’m clapping right now. I don’t know where this supposed conection with porn comes from but I can say in true honesty that I have naver shaved myself thinking about anyone BUT myself. I don’t get how is it right to be so judgemental about someone’s prefference over something as pubes.
I’m so sorry for offending you, I honestly am not putting anyone down for how they choose to keep their pubic hair, lol, I’m just saying that our choices aren’t made in a vacuum and whether someone watches p&rn or not, the historical influences of how women’s bodies are valued are inescapable and we are deluged with these messages from the day we’re born.
We should choose what we want of course, but I think we should also stop and ask WHY were choosing it.
If a girl (or a boy) was left completely alone to raise herself on a deserted island, I highly doubt she would grow up to feel compelled to repeatedly RIP her pubic hair out by the roots. (or curl her eyelashes, or go on a diet to be skinny, or wish for bigger boobs, etc. etc.)
With all that extra time she’d have not worrying about her looks, who knows, maybe she would build herself a boat 🙂
But how can you say you’re not putting anyone down for their choice, and yet state that their own choice is rooted in delusion, one to make them potentially appear weak? =/
Historically, women ARE praised for characteristics that make them appear weaker: being very thin, delicate, docile, compliant, young,hairless, easy to dominate, etc., as well as having hyper-“sexual” characteristics like large breasts, etc. that are associated with fertility and being a good “vessel.”
I’m NOT saying women who strive to fulfill these characteristics are weak, I’m saying that we should question WHY we strive to fulfill these characteristics and acknowledge how ingrained these biases are and the effects they have on us. I do think it’s naive/delusional to think that society has NO impact on our decisions and that in a vacuum we would make the same (often painful) choices.
I also think that men who prefer a certain beauty aesthetic don’t necessarily want women to be weak, it’s that they are influenced just as much as women are by the media and a very long history of praising women for particular traits. I think we ALL need to start questioning this stuff more.
Actually, during a certain stint in history those that were thin were looked down upon. It was a sign that they were laborers and weren’t apart of a certain class.
And, yes society has and does continue to affect certain trends; I’m not going to disagree with that. But I think where offence is taken within your initial statement (which is what I was/am trying to convey here) is where you state that THEIR personal choice is a delusion, and in fact not their choice at all. Honestly not trying to pick a fight, but when that’s said it appears as if our thought process and decisions are not our own, that we can’t think for ourselves and offence is taken.
Chutzpah – In the west, pron may have helped spread the look as indeed it did VHS , but the bare look is and has been a staple of many African and Arab cultures for centuries.
And as a matter of fact, the pron industry adopted the look so that they could get a better and clearer shot [pun unintended]. It certainly wasn’t about making the female weak and childlike as someone upthread has postulated, and the African and Arab societies that still go bare aren’t doing it for those reasons.
Runs with Scissors – Historically, thin women is a recent female development, and that only in the west. Historically, women have been bigger, and lots of cultures outside the west still celebrate bigger women as the ideal.
Hi Sera and LAX, thanks for your thoughtful responses, I get what you’re saying, I think I stated it badly in my initial post – to me, obviously it’s a choice (some wax, some don’t, and as far as I know, there aren’t any pube police who take that choice away from most women) but in my opinion, it’s a delusion to think that choice is made in a vacuum and isn’t influenced heavily by society, that’s all I meant, and I’m sure some would argue that they would have come up with the idea of ripping out all their pubic hair entirely on their own.
Also, as far as history is concerned, just in my lifetime, we went from most everyone having natural hair to most women having little/none which coincided with the ubiquitous free access to p&rn. Does anyone really think there’s no connection there? P&rn and the objectification of women trickles down to the mainstream in too many ways to count.(Bratz dolls and thong underwear for little girls anyone?)
I’d also like to point out that the thin look isn’t only for western women, when I lived in various countries in Asia and Europe women were just as concerned with being thin as they are in the west.
Also historically even when thinness wasn’t the ideal, other “weaker” traits still were. (I’m not even going to get into the foot-binding thing.)
Also you mention that the bare look is and has been a staple of many African and Arab cultures for centuries. But my question would be WHY was it a staple?
I really have no idea, so please forgive my ignorance if I’m off base here. Is it really so far fetched to think the look is linked with being young and hairless? Hairless means prepubescent, so it wouldn’t be a sign of fertility, but it would be a sign of virginity (innocent, docile, child like, inexperienced, etc. which are “weaker” traits.)
Whether people agree with Busy Philipps or not, I love that we’re at least debating stuff like this!
Others within the thread have already made that argument, and I suppose we’ll never really know what could have happened will we? As for choice, it is your opinion, but I am curious…if that were the basis, can that not be said for choices in music, food, other tastes and so on? Even our preferences in the most trivial things like Coke or Pepsi? Or does it only pertain to certain natural dynamics?
As for choice per grooming, I don’t know about Arab & African countries but grooming like that has been traced back to ancient Egyptians and Romans. They practiced it as a form of cleansing; to have hair of any or a certain type was seen as something only a slave or one of a lower class would have.
For the entire issue at hand, a woman should do as she pleases without getting flack for it either way. Now if only that could be practiced.
I started shaving as soon as I got hair down there. Waaaay before I ever saw a porn or anyone bare.
And no one has ever told me how they prefer pubic hair. My husband honestly doesn’t care as long as it doesn’t get in his way.
You seem to have gotten carried away with yourself. Removing ones pubic hair came LONG before the porn industry.
Ancient Egyptians considered it to be uncivilised to have pubic hair.
You seem to have a lot of misdirected anger… Im sure you’d love to think all women are little man pleasing drones but really, there are a couple of us who think for ourselves.
@Runs with Scissors
I truly think that you have some good points.
On the other hand, the body hair removing can be a choice of pure personal aesthetics.
I was maybe 10 years old and had a female teacher, creamy white skin with a very lot of rich dark hair, and long, long dark hair under her arm pits, and I was absolutely grossed out.
I am pretty much body hairless, armpits and legs, and started to shave as soon as some hair grew in my armpits.
Funny conversation: explaining to 16 year old daughter that in the “olden days” thongs and string bikinis were mainly worn by strippers! Thanks so much Victorias Secret!
VERY well said, and thank you! It is doubtless young girls (I am 39 myself) will not agree, but it is up to the older generation of women to share wisdom and lead by example. I daresay that I thought and said a lot of things as a younger woman that I do not agree with at this point in life. Looking through the rear-view mirror gives you some perspective. There are lots of things that I did (i.e. being a touch promiscuous) that I thought at the time, “I am taking control of my sexuality” but that I now see as a young girl being taken advantage of. And I regret some things.
I for one am tired of the over-sexualization of our society in the U.S. and the way that women are perceived and treated now that p@rn is the new norm. It used to be that it wasn’t available 24/7 on the internet and men had to suffer the embarrassment of slinking into a adult bookstore to purchase it….but alas, no more. I lament the loss of innocence and what civilized individuals used to act like. I did not have to grow up looking up to the likes of Paris Hilton — her booze-filled club nights at 15, slinky attire and a sex tape while still a teenager. I idolized women who made a difference, who were important, who had a real voice. My parents encouraged me in this.
And I do apologize if I come across as emotional about it, because I suppose I am. I feel strongly about feminist issues and even more so now that I have a young baby girl to nurture and protect. Each and every day, I strive to do everything in my power to raise her in an emotionally healthy and supportive environment, where she loves herself, her body and knows her worth as a human being. I think also that I have had a recent epiphany that (some) men view women as beings existing for their pleasure – in the wake of the 3 girls being held as sexual slaves up in Ohio. That story in particular has made me highly emotional over the hyper-sexualization of women that permeates our society.
Gosh, and thank you for reading — if any of you still are!
For the record, I am well manicured, but by no means bare. And still pretty and petite at 39, with a baby and a full time job as an attorney! 🙂 So hotness does not equal bare…in case anyone wanted to shout at the screen “hush up, old lady…you are probably ugly and old and fat and that is why you feel this way”! Uhm….no!
in case anyone wanted to shout at the screen “hush up, old lady…you are probably ugly and old and fat and that is why you feel this way”!
Anyone who does that is either 12 or Amanda Bynes 😜
You make excellent points, as does the original poster, and I have to +1 this and add a bit – and do the obnoxious but necessary thing of writing that I’m 38, married, thin, pretty so that the ‘you’re obviously a fat, lonely, Yeti h8r!’ idiocy stops before it starts.
Young women have been sold a bill of goods about using their sexuality as a primary kind of power in all kinds of environments where that simply wasn’t appropriate before 2000 or so. I’ve been in a variety of corporate firms and have seen very smart women use their appearance a hell of a lot more than their J.D.s in ways that are just incredibly depressing and surprising. Accordingly, though, you have this additional ugliness where they argue with great passion that dedicating themselves to the culture of the body – to constant upkeep – is empowering, and a way to value themselves. It’s a crock of s&it, and leads to obvious anxiety and envy.
“Female Chauvinist Pigs” by A. Levy (herself a young woman!) should be required reading for this thread, as it neatly summarizes how the porn aesthetic permeates our society, and influences choices and behaviors of those who’ve never seen or heard images of people having sex. You do not need to actually be a porn consumer to have the values of porn and specifically the highly narrow aesthetic (thin, big-t!tted, generally white or if not white, at least, long-haired, young) valorized by porn surround you. Because it does.
Women who hit puberty around the time when you could WiFi your way to endless porn can’t conceptualize of a time, really, when porn was very much a hidden (though always hugely profitable) element of our society, and less important at dictating cultural values.
Believe it, or don’t, but yeah, wanting zero hair from beneath your eyelashes on down does NOT make you cleaner or healthier than other women, and you may like it for many reasons, but it’s not a choice made in a cultural vacuum. I saw a dermatologist – a renowned one, in NYC, earlier this year – for other reasons, and talked to him about some skin irritation, and asked him what *was* the best bet for exfoliating before hair removal, which I do every once in a while. And he said (and he’s maybe 35 or so), that they’re all bad. All depilatory methods, **including IPL and other lasers,** will fail some patients. They won’t work full-term, the hair *will* come back, especially for a significant number of women in peri and full menopause (which could be 35-40 for many), and for waxers/shavers, there is no sure-fire way to avoid rashes, bumps, and ingrowns. But he’s probably a h8r, amirite?
@Yup
Thanks for pointing to Ariel Levy. Good reading.
The discomfort I feel when reading about women = girls = the sexiest = the hottest and watching entertainers acting like glamorized prostitutes on stage, has finally a name: raunch culture.
Levy put into words what I could not really name.
Totally agree with you. We can thank porn also for causing some women to think their “lips” are too big and undergoing painful surgery. I don’t think some younger women think of any of this, but it is important. Men watch porn and then judge and criticize our bodies. P.S. If I ever saw a hairless male “down there” I would run screaming from the room. I do a neat trim and if somebody doesn’t like it they can kiss my ass. Supposedly the hair holds in pheromones, which add to the sexual experience.
I live in the American South. It’s hot. It’s humid. It’s sticky. We wear shorts and love to go to the lake. I take it all off. More daughter has just started to notice that I don’t have hair while some of her babysitters do (changing at swim) as well as some older friends starting to develop.
I told her it was a matter of personal preference. I did it bc I got hot. I told her anyway was ok as long as she was happy and comfortable w it. I told her we were all beautiful.
I get mine waxed if I want to wear a bikini and go to the beach, I don’t want to have to worry about a pubicgate incident. I’ve never made the connection to the porn industry/ looking like a little girl before, it just seems polite not to flash the hair if you’re in a swim suit.
It’s a bitch to upkeep though! Ingrown hair follicles are the worst.
Bikini crotch spiders!
Get laser (not IPL). It is a miracle worker for ingrowns. So much easier than constant shaving/waxing. Do not skimp out and go to a really cheap place – do some research and pick somewhere with good results.
Your comment really got me thinking: why is it rude to see the body in it’s natural state?
I remember being about 8 years old and going for swimming lessons at school. Our instructor was one of the grandparents who volunteered. She was in her early sixties, rounded body, totally fun and comfortable with herself. She had a huge pubic bush which used to hang out of her costume. I only noticed it when a little boy in our group pointed and giggled. I didn’t have any thoughts about it :it looked a bit wire-like to my prepubescent self but I knew we all would grow it someday.
In my teens, I didn’t see any porn on the internet but I was used to seeing swimming costume ads, lingerie ads, Baywatch, etc. Costumes, and everyday underwear, got smaller and more revealling, year by year. So, I suppose bikini waxing escalated in response.
Reading this entirely thread is making me consider cultural conditioning and societal influence, both implicit and explicit. I don’t really have an eloquent summary comment: I just worry about what my nieces’ generation is exposed to on a daily basis and how this impacts on their body image and separate sense of self-worth.
I’m sorry but why do celebs feel the need to talk about the state of their biscuits? I don’t care to know if they are waxed, shaved, bedazzled, pierced or whatever. Too much info. Keep something private. I hear what she’s saying but keep that to yourself. No need to let everyone know.
She was asked directly by the interviewer – and being Busy, she answered directly.
But I agree, enough already with all this personal information. Ask about the person’s career for heavens sake.
Agreed.
Bizarre? Yeah, your down there is a personal choice, but we’re still trying to DE sexualize children and it IS weird to be waxing yourself bald as a grown woman. Groom, by all means, I do. But your hair is there to protect your bits!
Protect them from what exactly?
Pirates.
Biscuit bugs, crotch critters, and dust.
Lmao at pirates.
I guess my underwear is good enough protect. I never had any problems with anything listed above.
Can you get biscuit bugs if there’s no Forest for them to live in?
Since this is sex ed 101, I’ll refrain from thinking you’re dumb re: underwear protects you better than what automatically grows in for you. A lot of yeast infections are directly related to overheated bits/underwear made from anything besides cotton. However, your hair remains around your bits and your eyes to trap things like dirt and bacterial particles which can lead to vaginitis/yeast infections.
Wow. I said it was good enough, I didn’t say it was better. But thanks, I already knew what hair is for. I’ve never had a yeast or any other type of infection so my underwear seem to be doing the job.
Amanda de Cadenet is happening. Love the show.
Also, I started going bare at 12. In the mid 80s – before it was cool. I didn’t like it poking through my swim suits where people could see it.
My friends tried to shamed by saying I looked easy.
Women have GOT TO STOP tearing each other down. That’s the lesson we need to teach our daughters.
That seems to be to be rather an inapt story, and a poor analogy.
Mean teasing by kids in the 80s isn’t analogous in any way, shape or form to girls, young women – to anyone female alive in this world – being given the constant message that the natural state of her body is not only ugly and gross but unhygenic and unhealthy. That a woman who doesn’t shave/wax/laser is dirty, lazy, and not sexy, unlike a woman with bald labia. This thread is full of that nonsense, unfortunately.
nobody said that not shaving is nasty. most people are stating their opinion. just b/c you decide to go hairless or not, it doesnt have anything to do with porn. you’re reading too much into it. like the other poster, some people do it b/c they feel more comfortable.
Good god, could these celebrities find something else to talk about besides pubic hair? Is this really the way it is in Hollywood? Your entire revved around what you eat, what you wear, and where you wax?
Grooming is personal. Most people get that. Shaddup about it! Read a book or something!
Yes, children do notice these things. I had the exact same epiphany that Busy did
I always find it interesting where people draw the line. Leg and armpit hair are also signs of an adult female who’s gone through puberty, but an awful lot of people who have issues with waxing your junk take that hair off without a second thought. As an adult far more people are going to see your bare legs and your underarms than your vulva, so surely removing hair from those areas is going to be more influential.
For many women a slight mustache, possibly even a bit of a beard if you’re really lucky, are quite early signs of aging. Will the anti-brazilian brigade be eschewing vanity and letting that hair remain on their bodies so that their daughters can see the natural aging process in action?
I wax it all off and have done so for yonks, since back when porn was all about the massive bush. Trust me, no one, at any time since I began waxing, would ever be able to mistake me for a pre-pubescent girl, not even if they were looking at me through a vat of vaseline. I started doing it because at the time I was living in a hot climate with unreliable water availability and in that situation you want to get rid of anything that traps sweat. I kept doing it because it improved my sex life and because it made me feel fresher and more comfortable. Not cleaner or more hygenic just to be clear, just a lot less sweaty and damp.
Yep people get awfully crazy throwing accusations around about how we’re all secret paedophilia fetish anti feminists who only want to please men.
But you are and its sad you cant see that.
Wtf Kim?!
I actually hate my armpit hair! A bush doesn’t bother me in the least, but I’ve always detested my armpit hair >:|. So much so that I’ve been getting laser hair treatments on them. Freaking amazing that I won’t have to worry about shaving my underarms every second day now! If it wasn’t so pricey, I’d be getting laser hair removal on my legs as well…
@Jess – pubic hair is *usually* removed to meet modern sexual norms, unless you are just talking about bikini line and keeping things tidied up down there. Leg, underarm and facial hair is removed because hair in these areas can be visible to everyone. So even though all are technically signs of an adult woman, only one has a sexual connotation- different kettle of fish. Yes, I know some women like yourself just prefer the feel of bare, and would do it even if they were to abstain from sex or even if huge bushes came back in vogue but I bet they are in the minority.
I agree with Busy. Kids are sooo curious, they do pay attention to such things from a very young age…they don’t usually see other women’s vagina’s and I just think it’s good for them to have something to differentiate down there.
I am rolling my eyes at the people who are equating waxing your hair off down below to wanting to look like a young girl. That says far more about you than the people who are actually doing the waxing.
I am completely hairless because I think it is unhygienic to have full hair down there. The same reason that I have my armpits waxed. It has nothing to do with wanting to look like a child, it is personal preference.
Hilarious. Unhygienic to be in a state that is natural for an adult female? In what way exactly? It’s fine to say that waxing doesn’t mean you want to look like a little girl. I don’t believe it does. I think waxing or not is a matter of personal preference and that is all. But to say not waxing is unhygienic is not only untrue, it’s idiotic.
Way back when they used to shave all the hair off prior to women were giving birth. This was supposed to be for sterile purposes. This practice was discontinued when “someone from the AMA” decided that leaving the hair in place is no risk to a safe delivery.
Thank you! A lot of women on this thread desperately want to believe that, though, and to act like getting your pubes waxed or lasered off is a choice made in a vacuum — and that *they* are under cultural assault. For just being too pretty in the pube area, according to current norms! It’s so HARD when mean women with ‘giant 70s bushes’ (“I’m not criticizing, though! Just sayin’!!!!”) say, well, norms have changed. So hard!
It’s the same badge of duh worn by some women in the weight threads: “It’s JUST as hurtful to call a woman skinny as it is to call her fat!” And it is. On Mars. But not on f&cking planet Earth.
Im rolling my eyes that you bought into what men want as being what you would chose to do. You arent doing it for hygiene you are doing it for a man- be honest. There is nothing unhygenic about pubic hair – absolutely nothing. Waxing makes you look like a 5 yr old. No grown woman is hairless (unless they have some rare medical condition) so it is completely unnatural to shave your entire pubic region.
I’m rolling my eyes at your comment. So now a woman that waxes can’t think/choose for herself?
Yea a lot of things we do is unnatural, like dying your hair or shaving your legs or armpits. Makeup is unnatural. It’s not a big deal.
@ kim
why dont you be honest? you obviously have problems with women that wax for some reason. maybe you need to search yourself as to why you feel you’re the judge and jury for how women groom themselves. are we wrong for taking a shower too? Do you think we take showers for men? why dont you not worry about other people, worry about yourself. what anybody else does is none of your business.
I just can’t with people on this post who act like it is disgusting and unhygienic to not shave or wax to baldness. Did you really just equate waxing off all your pubes with taking a shower?? Really?!?! Just, no.
I never, ever heard of being bald down there compared to prepubescent girls until I came to this site. The people that make that connection creep me out.
Me too. I never thought about that or porn, that’s just ridiculous to me.
I assume you are young and were born into the porn culture of today that says no pubic hair for a woman is normal. Its not. It is porn star and pedophilish to want a woman to have no pubic hair. Look at Playboy up until the late 90’s and all the women had ALOT of pubic hair and were considered the sexiest women around. The switch came when sex tapes and porn become commonplace. Women need to be honest they dont shave themselves for themselves they do it for a man. Come on we wouldnt even shave our legs or armpits if it werent for men-haha!
Yes I am young. I started shaving before I ever saw pr0n or let a man near there. I continued to shave even when I wasn’t in a relationship. My husband has no preference as long as it doesn’t get in his way. It is normal for women to not have pubic hair. It’s normal for women to have pubic hair. I think it’s normal for women to do whatever they want with their pubic hair and I’m not going to judge them!
Public hair is not the only thing that separated women from children.
I don’t care what anyone does to themselves, but I’m going to agree with her.
Growing leg hair didn’t faze me as a child (My own child has pretty dark hair and she’s definitely not old enough to shave). Arm pit hair– didn’t bother me too much.
But, for some reason, growing pubic hair — I felt weird, like, I was really alone and some kind of freak.
I would imagine that growing up now would be confusing. Fake boobs, fake noses, extremely skinny women, no pubic hair…how could a teen or a preteen even be able to know what is normal if they don’t have someone in their life to guide?
Well the guide could just tell the girl that pubic hair is normal. Grooming is normal. Do what you want to do!
Why is that a legitimate question in an interview?
She is not a sex therapist or psychologist, so can you imagine a male actor or any other professional being asked about his grooming habits?
Well, men used to be asked the boxers or briefs question. There’s just a lot of stuff out there these days about people’s business that should probably have stayed their own business.
Getting rid of all your pubic hair can raise your risk of infection. Not to mention the rising number of shaving accidents…
Personally, I find the hairless look a bit gross. It looks way too juvenile to me, and it’s uncomfortable. During a humid, hot summer I find talcum powder works just fine for keeping fresh. The only guys I’ve ever had object to body hair were (unsurprisingly) in their early 20s and incredibly inexperienced. Porn is a bad teacher, kids.
I have read that talc powder down there can cause ovarian cancer. I don’t know if that is a myth or not, but you may want to try a talc free powder. Talc is related to asbestos.
Didn’t know that, thanks for the info!
The stuff I use right now says it doesn’t have any talcum in it. Corn starch is good for keeping skin dry and cool if you’re concerned about reactions due to fragrances or ingredients!
So glad someone in Hollywood is seeing the feminist issue in suffering intense pain just to remove hair from one’s private area. It’s time this stupid, painful practice was ended!
I just want to say I don’t care if you shave it, wax it, tweeze it, pluck it, comb it, braid it, twist it into dreadlocks or dye it with grape kool-aid and call it Purplesaurus Rex.
wow a sane person! nice to meet you! stupid how nuts this thread is1
For the real Purplesaurus Rex look, you might need some yellow dye also. Recipe for the unfortunately discontinued Purplesaurus Rex kool-aid: mix 1 part grape kool-aid with 1/2 part lemon kool-aid. Just thought I’d share.
ROFL! Thanks!
The other day my two year old daughter said to me, “you have a vagina beard!”
Haha! I love that description.
I wax once or twice a year just for the beach. It has nothing to do with adult movies is just easier to bath without the worries of hairs going out of control down there.
Oh and my boyfriend once told me that he is interested just for the “joy hole”, not the surrounding areas, that’s my territory and if i want to torture myself with waxing it was up to me. he just wants it clean and fresh
Now this is a role model! She is so right. Men who like no hair on womens vaginas strike me as pedophiles. What man wants a grown woman to look like a 5 yr old! Waxing is ok to keep neat but waxing it all off is so porn star and classless. Be real – no woman waxes all the hair off for herself. It hurts, it a pain to maintain, ingrowns are a bitch, etc. And the body after baby spreads are disgusting and send a terrible message. We need more actresses like Busy! Love her!
I prefer bare myself and have been grooming since puberty hit, long before I even thought about men sexually. Now that I have a bf I prefer us both bare and that doesn’t make me a pedo. I just don’t like hair, facial or pubic. My italian bf is bearlike without grooming. Pubes in my mouth are a turn off and I didn’t learn that from porn, just experience.
@Kim: “Be real – no woman waxes all the hair off for herself.”
You know, unless she DOES! A woman’s grooming preference doesn’t automatically have to equate to a man’s wants.
When I was in my late teens/early twenties, I shaved my legs only in winter because otherwise knee socks were more uncomfortable. Once I realized I was just allergic to the wool component and switched to cotton, I gave it up. Can’t remember when I gave up shaving arm pit hair, probably sooner because shaving hurts… Turned out my high school French teacher was right, it comes in coarser and more plentiful if you shave it. Mine became softer and thinner as time went by after I stopped in both places. A male friend told me that he wished his wife didn’t shave her legs – her stubble hurt him sleeping next to her!
Now I’m essentially hairless in those places (and almost so in the area under discussion) but can’t recommend the method. A few years ago I was sick and couldn’t eat much for a couple of months. The hair on top of my head sacrificed itself for the greater good and died so other parts could live on the scarce supply of nutrients, coming out gradually in combing. Felt like a shedding cat. New hair was growing in at the same time, once I got on the right antibiotics. But apparently the hair elsewhere decided not to grow back, except for stray facial hairs that drive me crazy since it feels odd and I pluck at it ( like biting nails).
Anyway, my utopia would let everybody do what they want with various types of body hair. Comfort is probably the key point for most people.
Precisely! If we only lived in such a place! But more importantly, glad to hear that you’re doing better! 🙂
Maybe someone should send these pics to Kim Kardashian. See, a woman can be very pregnant and still look nice and comfortable at the same time.
i disagree on the looking nice, at least in the red dress. that is way too tight and looks weird on a pregnant woman. next thing you know, we’ll see preggo women wearing bandage dresses. that reminds of the tight green dress kk wore.
I created an account just to comment on this thread. First of all, genital grooming is something that should not be discussed on TV. Ever.
Secondly, some people here have strong opinions, and that’s fine; however, if you’re going to accuse someone of being a pedophile (or closeted pedophile) or a victim of the Great Pr0nification of America, you should probably back that up with some data. We don’t know each other here, so it’s a tad offensive to read the assertion that going bare increases a WOMAN’s own sexual pleasure and then accuse her of being subservient to a man’s whims. *That* strikes me as anti-feminist.
On the subject of hygiene, here is some food for thought: http://www.bloomberg.com/news/2013-01-13/brazilian-bikini-waxes-make-crab-lice-endangered-species-health.html
Carry on.
Thank you! And your screen name is fitting. 🙂
I don’t think it sends a terrible message, but I am tired of baby after body spreads. Mommy-culture generally makes me want to puke.
I’m not sure what you mean by Mommy-culture, but as a Mommy I feel a little offended by that comment 🙁
Sorry, let me clarify! A couple of things: One, the hype over celebrity moms, as if they should dictate what regular people do. Like, I’m supposed to care what kind of stroller Kate Middleton will buy when she gives birth? I won’t even be able to afford it!
And the whole obsession with baby bumps, which is a pretty vile term to begin with. Halle Barry isn’t my sister. I don’t care if she’s showing or not.
If you google, there’s a short post about it on The Cinephile’s Wife blog (second page of results) that talks a bit about women who build their identities around being a mom. That’s what I’m really getting at. Suddenly the CEO of her own company is being introduced as “a mom and a CEO,” not “a CEO with children.” It’s this emphasis on being a mom first, and a woman second. The fact that mommy-blogger is now a career option is a good example!
i never saw my mother naked. if i had, i would probably have wanted the opposite of whatever she had.
the second mine grew in, i shaved it off. i hated the way it felt, like an oddly placed sweater. and i was about 11 so i was not influenced by porn or a man.
i wax it all off now. i cant imagine letting it grow in. but i also cant imagine telling someone else what to do with her area. unless i am having sex with you, it’s not my business.
Hair grows there for a reason. You can interrupt biology all you want, but if you shave off your eyelashes, you got shit in your eyes.
I can’t imagine what would possess anyone to ask such a question in an interview. Stupid…
That’s what I’m saying! Who cares?
Why this person famous? I have no clue what movies/television this woman has been in and she is in/on many magazines and internet sites. Is shy really this popular?
She is an actress and she has been in Freaks and Geeks, ER and is presently in Cougar Town with Courtney Cox. And yes she is good at her craft. And that is why she is known. And on top of all that she is one cool chica!
What is classy about discussing your privates with the public?
The obsession with body image and everything that goes with it is really just a symptom of sexual obsession. When I look at what some people put themselves through, in their quest to achieve the perfect sex life, I think that life would be better for them if they put their efforts into overcoming their obsession with sex instead. There’s more to life than copulation…..just not much more. Kidding. 🙂
I’ve never waxed. I guess a little afraid of the pain that would ensue, but I usually shave a little bit during summertime, when I know I a going to the beach. Don’t want any hairs sticking out of my bottoms. Personally I dont get the whole “If you wax, then you want to look like a child” argument. We shave/wax our legs and armpits. Is that because we want to look like children as well?
We just had this scenario come up but um..from a male side ..my son is 11 and starting puberty and well told me that he was manscaping and I was shocked bc well he has lil hair but wanted to look like his father..so it is a very real possible conversation and observation..so my husband decided to be more natural so our son knew that was a natural process…
What amazes me is the lack of knowledge about hair removal in general.
Waxing was developed by the ancient Egyptians. It’s not like it’s something new. There are many religions and cultures around the world that have been removing all of their body hair since ancient times, including pubic hair.
18th century French women removed all of their hair and pierced their nipples as well. Said nipples were then also adorned with jewels and showcased OUTSIDE of the decollage of the dresses. 18th century American women used a very nasty homemade version of Nair to remove body hair.
I have a 20 year old daughter and whatever her grooming habits are are not my business. She knew that women have body hair everywhere and started to shave her armpits and legs when puberty hit because it was itchy in dance tights. I am bare down there thanks to laser as all of my body hair comes back ingrown. You have not lived until a group of those come in ingrown and get infected and you end up having to go under the knife to have the cluster removed. Yes, it does happen.
As to young men not liking pubic hair, my 11 year old son is also aware that women get hair there, thank you to the public change room at the pool. He asked when he was 3 why the one woman in the change room had hair there and I did not. It was explained in the manner a 3 year old would understand and life went on. If he grows up to want to remove his hair or prefers a woman bare, that’s his choice, not mine.
Explaining that hair is natural is good. Stating that those of us who are bare have something wrong with us or that our significant others like prepubescent girls is rude and judgmental. Perhaps everyone could teach their children that how they would like to wear their body hair is as much of a choice as how they like to wear the hair on their head and that it is no ones business but their own.
I have nothing against waxing, shaving, wearing make up etc but be honest girls if you knew a man was never going to see it would you be waxing it entirely? I would not wax at all if that was the case and i think majority of women feel the same way. Perhaps a few women would do it for themselves and i have no problem with that – its the expectation that women should be completely hairless all over: arms, legs, pubic area) that is the problem.
some people do not like hair and some do-a little waxing can be nice and actually taking hair off legs and Vagina was a form of keeping woman young as HAIR meant sexy women before we got all crazy over the decades. I think she is doing what is correct for her daughter and I must say being close to 40 I am one of the last few girls who sneaked peaks at playboy and saw natural breasts and vagina!I know what real breasts look like and so I never had that issue as t why mine aren’t perky the day before I conceived my son. Reading books on beauty and WOmen is very empowering you like ‘the beauty project’ where they study the anthroplogical development of beauty in societies , there was a time we hardly bathed! I am happy to do a nice bikini wax even when I am not is a physical relationship because I have a lot of hair and it is my preference. I do not judge anyone for what makes them feel groomed etc I sometimes wonder why a woman may put herslef under a knife but who am I to be rude about it. I do not subscribe to hedereosexist iews on beauty in all every part of my grooming or dressing routines. Keep in mind all the waxing today requires actors in nude scenes in period films wear Mirkins (a pu$$Y toupee) and their origin was actually to create a bigger bush to hide std and for looks.also breast surgery and teeth veneers make it harder to cast for period films .so things change at least now we can maybe see lumps and bumps /j/k