Emma Roberts ’25 things’ is hilariously bland, never mentions domestic violence

Emma Roberts

These are some photos of Emma Roberts and Evan Peters on the set of “American Horror Story” last weekend. To be entirely truthful, I started to write about these pictures days ago and then scrapped the draft (probably to write about Justin Bieber) because the photos alone didn’t seem like enough of a reason to write about Emma. Sure, Emma and Evan were big news a few weeks ago when it was revealed that she was arrested for domestic violence after biting and delivering a bloody nose to Evan and also the next day when Emma’s camp tried to explain the incident away as a “passionate and extreme relationship,” but everyone lost interest in Emma just a few days later when she began to promote We’re The Millers.

Before going any further, can I first say that I’m embarrassed to have been sitting in a theater a few weeks ago while many (and I mean many) people laughed at the We’re The Millers trailer? They weren’t even laughing at the trailer — they were laughing with it. How disturbing. Meanwhile, my brother was completely embarrassed to watch the Jennifer Aniston stripper scene while sitting next to his big sister. LOL. Sorry, kid.

Anyway, Emma and Evan look completely homey and happy in these photos together. I don’t watch this show, but I understand that it’s an anthology where the seasons jump around in chronology, and Evan has played more than one character, including accused serial killer Kit Walker. As for Emma, she’s joining the show this season and will play “a self-involved party girl by the name of Madison.” So these two lovebirds are really putting the whole domestic violence stuff behind them — at least for the time being. They’re photographed hitting craft services together, and then Evan puts his arm around Emma for a little bit of PDA.

Emma Roberts

Emma Roberts

Honestly, I don’t understand what Evan is thinking by staying with Emma, but apparently they’re both into it. As for Emma herself, she’s still gotta promote Millers, and she’s doing so with a “25 things” for Us Weekly. Of course, she sounds entirely wholesome throughout the entirety of this list:

1. In school, I was constantly in detention for being late. Now I’m always five minutes early.
2. I drink an iced coffee with one Splenda every morning to wake up.
3. I still have Steve, my baby blanket. Nobody knows why I named him that, including me.
4. “The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills” and “The Bachelor” are my guilty TV pleasures.
5. I had to wear a school uniform and I loved it.
6. I failed my driver’s test three times.
7. I used to sing along to the Dixie Chicks at karaoke when I was 7.
8. My favorite workout is Ballet Bodies.
9. When I was 12, I cried after not getting the role of Wendy in the film Peter Pan.
10. I want to write my own cookbook one day.
11. My dream vacation spot is Bali or Thailand.
12. I attended Sarah Lawrence College… for six weeks.
13. I love to make pies, especially peach.
14. I went to Minnesota’s Camp Birchwood for six years.
15. I won awards there in tennis, archery and sailing.
16. One of my top books is Joan Didion’s Play It as It Lays.
17. My 12-year-old sister, Grace, is taller than me. I’m so jealous.
18. My favorite movies: Almost Famous and Heathers.
19. I could live off spicy tuna on crispy rice.
20. I’m scared of flying.
21. I attended an all-girls school for one year.
22. I sucked my thumb until the age of 12.
23. I still wear Invisalign because of it.
24. I love to snowboard – on the bunny hill.
25. When I was 16 I pierced my belly button. My mom found out during a family trip to Disneyland. It was not the Happiest Place on Earth that day!

[From Us Weekly]

I drink an iced coffee with one Splenda every morning to wake up…” And the most controversial item on this list just might be the belly piercing. Clearly, Emma’s publicist has vetted this list and then left room for a Goop-styled cookbook one day. What I don’t get is this — Emma is clearly playing a bad girl (that is, a runaway with an attitude) in Millers, so why is her team scrambling to erase the (recent) red marks on her image? There’s nothing here about Emma’s party-girl ways, her consistent visits to blow dry bars, or one solitary scrap of remorse at injuring her boyfriend. Fake.

Emma Roberts

Emma Roberts

Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet

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26 Responses to “Emma Roberts ’25 things’ is hilariously bland, never mentions domestic violence”

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  1. puffy says:

    GET OUT, EVAN!!! I’m so bummed she’s going to be on AHS.

  2. brin says:

    26. I am an entitled bitch who beats the crap out of my bf…oh wait, you already know that.

    • bns says:

      +1

      I hate her aunt and now the dislike is being passed on to the next generation Roberts.

      • Christin says:

        And just think…Auntie’s antics were barely starting at age 23. I think it is a bit funny that bland niece is acting up just as Auntie prepares to make a comeback this fall.

        I hope that someday Vera can wear a shirt in public that reads, “Julia Who-lia?”

  3. Holly says:

    Even in that 1st pic (and more so in the 5th) she really is just the picture of health isn’t she?

    Pale, gamey, no muscle mass anywhere, cig in hand and looking like a hooker after a seriously long meth bender. To be rich and famous…!

    • Meaghan says:

      She looks horrible, which is weird because based on that dress isn’t she filming? Shouldn’t she have hair and make-up teams?

      That dress is WAAAAAAAAY too tight, I can almost count her pubic hairs individually it’s so tight.

    • aleks says:

      just because someone is pale doesn’t mean they’re unhelthy.

  4. Andrew says:

    I honestly laughed with we’re the millers trailer too…I think it’ll be funny, and Emma seems to fit the part. They really do seem happy together so whatever, I’ve given up on caring about celeb couples and I’ll just focus on worrying about my friends’ sometimes crazy relationships. ;P

  5. Talie says:

    I’m pretty sure Julia Roberts uses her power to cover up Emma’s behavior–she seems to keep a close eye on her.

    Interesting that she went to college for 6 weeks, she probably should’ve stayed longer and got some of that partying out of her system.

  6. Esmom says:

    C’mon, you don’t really think she’s the only one to submit a whitewashed/fabricated “25 things” list? Being bland and innocuous is what that list is all about, no matter who the subject is.

    Anyhoo…I hadn’t seen it before, but Evan’s kinda cute.

  7. kiki says:

    I read this as a reminder that she is still very young and “still figuring things out”.

  8. Birdie says:

    I really cannot stand her, I hate that she’s going to be on AHS (I was disappointed at first just because she’s such a meh-level actress and now because I know she’s also a horribly violent person who passes it off as being “passionate”) and I hate that she seems to be getting a free pass with this domestic violence sh!t. Not ok.

  9. Keats says:

    Ok I am the most boring person ever and I’m pretty sure I could come up with 25 more interesting facts about myself.

  10. Mr. Stinky FishFace says:

    *Sigh* I love Evan. That is all.

  11. ZigZagZoey says:

    Wow, beyond boring!
    She cried because she didn’t get a part…WTF!
    She went to some college for 6 weeks? WTF!
    And LMAO that she loves the movie Almost Famous…Describes her perfectly.

  12. Nerd Alert says:

    Yeah, supes boring!

    Favorite movie is Almost Famous? It’s a good movie, and the lead, Patrick Fugit, looks JUST like an older version of her boyfriend Evan. Actually, when he made Almost Famous, he looked like Evan does now. Like, that’s who I thought she was with at Coachella:

    http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0297578/resumephotos

    Also, I’m starting to think their “domestic violence” thing was just super rough sex. A “source” told me that he likes that. Anyway, he was really good in AHS S1.

    And I can’t wait for new season of AHS. And for Season 2 to go on Netflix; they should really tell people when new stuff is coming. NetflixNews or something.

    • Rose says:

      @Nerd Alert I’m curious, can you elaborate on what this “source” said? Does he like to dominate or be dominated? Does getting punched in the nose count as hardcore sex these days.

  13. Tig says:

    I watched the first season of AHS- love Connie Britton- once her character left, so did I!

    Was he on show the first season? If yes, was he the creepy kid who maybe was a ghost? TX- too lazy to look it up!

    If they are fact into ” rough sex”- prob should stay out of hotels, or find one with sound proof walls!

  14. Relli says:

    You know what I learned from this list… Emma Roberts and I have more in common than i would have ever thought. Stars they really are just like us!

  15. Kristine says:

    I have a major crush on Evans thanks to AHS. Why is he with her? She isn’t even attractive and she’s an abuser. Date meeeee. The only abuse I will inflict on you is massive amounts of sexy time.

  16. Norman says:

    I don’t know how she got into Sarah Lawrence College but was academics part of the deal? And if so was six weeks worth the tuition?

  17. ParisPucker says:

    she is a yawn, so why expect more other than a punch in the face?

  18. tinyfencer says:

    Is she stubbing out her cigarette on the ground with her foot in that last pic? How disgusting and entitled can you be? The world is not your ashtray, young lady.