Scarlett Johnasson must have stolen my list of imaginary eligible men I would hook up with if I weren’t already engaged.

I am not pathetic. If Ross from Friends can do it, so can I.

First she goes out with Josh Hartnett, then Justin Timberlake. Now she’s been spotted this Easter weekend in NYC with Ryan Reynolds. Here’s what People Online had to say about them:

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds spent a busy weekend in New York City together.

On Saturday night, the pair were seen getting close at the Manhattan restaurant Odeon. “They were in a good mood,” says one eyewitness who saw them laughing and smiling.

“They were definitely holding hands,” says another observer. “They were a cute couple!”

I don’t want them to be a cute couple! I have loved Reynolds since he was Berg on Two Guys, a Girl and a Pizza Place, and I doubt Scarlett would appreciate the Berg-ness in Reynolds that has obsessed me to the point I had to especially subscribe to the ABC channel on Sky just so I can get my fix. I was only forced to do this after my fiance refused to let put up my Ryan Reynolds poster in our room.

Speaking of Scarlett, she was voted as having the “sexiest body in the world” by Glamour magazine. The magazine states: “With curves to rival Marilyn Monroe’s, Scarlett embraces old-school Hollywood style and exudes body confidence”.

Dammit! As long as people keep voting her the hottest thing since Tabasco sauce, she’s going to continue swiping my pretend boyfriends. I am going right now to my journal and officially shredding my list just in case she sees Cillian Murphy is on it. I might even grab a Barbie out of my daughter’s room and use it as a Scarlett voodoo doll. Just in case, of course.