Here’s a good question: is Jennifer “Perpetually Unlucky In Love” Aniston the kind of person who tries to do “set-ups” for her single friends, but only when she has a steady boyfriend? I bet she is. I bet she’s the girl who – as soon as she’s got a boyfriend – is the one saying, “Oh, I’m so sad that you’re single. I should set you up with Random McBeefcake.” Maybe I’m projecting, but I’ve known plenty of passive-aggressive girls like that. Anyway, there’s a report (which is probably BS, but it was too good to pass up) about Jennifer wanting to set Gwyneth Paltrow up with a mutual-ish friend: Orlando Bloom!
Jennifer Aniston is trying to set Gwyneth Paltrow up with Orlando Bloom. The former ‘Friends’ actress – who is engaged to Justin Theroux – wants to help the blonde beauty find love again, following her split from Coldplay frontman Chris Martin, and thinks she and the ‘Lord of the Rings’ actor, who split from wife Miranda Kerr last year, might be a perfect fit.
A source said: ”Now that she’s found love, Jen wants the same sort of happiness for all her friends, so when Gwyn pointed out that Orlando was hot, she started to play matchmaker.”
Jennifer is hoping to host a dinner party which both singletons will be invited to, and they’ll be joined by a number of couples too.
The source added to heat magazine: ”She’s not a pushy person so she’d never do it without the go-ahead from Gwyneth – but if Gwyn says yes, Jen’s planning to throw a little dinner party at her house. ‘She’ll invite a few other couples so it’s a party instead of a set-up. The last thing she wants to do is put them in an awkward situation.”
I want this to be true just because my new happy place is imagining the look on Gwyneth’s face when she realized that That TV Girl was trying to set her up with Miranda Kerr’s remainders. HOW GAUCHE. Obviously, Gwyneth’s next (official) boyfriend is going to be someone rich. Not necessarily someone with their own celebrity profile or anything, but there will be lots and lots of money and it will be someone who feels at home in Dame Gwyneth’s elite circle.
Also: this is just a note for our friend Stacie, who adorably geeked out about this story. She pointed out that Gwyneth banged Viggo Mortensen back in the 1990s, so if Goop banged Orlando, that would mean that “she’ll have slept with two of the Fellowship.” Next stop: Elijah Wood!!!
(PS… I didn’t notice it before now, but Orlando Bloom and Peggy Olsen have the same bob haircut.)
Photos courtesy of WENN.
The Viggo rumor needs to die, now. And you better stay away from Samwise, Goopy!
and no Frodo either!
She can have Frodo, he’s kinda whiny. 😉 Actually, her and Sauron would make a smashing power couple.
She can’t have have Legolas either. Give her Pippen.
Ummmm…isn’t the Necromancer from The Hobbit technically Sauron? And well the Necromancer is voiced by Benedict Cumberbatch which means Sauron is too good for Goop. So no. No Sauron for Goop!
Stay away from Mr. Frodo!!
But she can have Viggo if she wants…
Oh dear, Middle Earth has gone to sh-t. Again.
I don’t think I’ve ever seen an interview with Elijah. What’s he like? Woul he be a match for Goopy?
And no, she can’t have Pip.
@ Tatjana, no he wouldn’t be.. he is my precious
Well damn it all to hell; she can have Smeagol. Now that’s a match made in Middle Earth Heaven. I can just hear Gollum saying to Goop. “I’ll lick it for some precious”
Lol V4Real, I think you nailed it.
And nice work, blue marie. 😀
Yes it does because it’s making me side-eye him hard and I don’t want to do that.
You know what I took away from this article? “Random McBeefcake”, that’s what! This is totally going to be my (male) drag name when I do Halloween this Oct. I”m going to tell people my nickname is “Randy”, cause that works too. Help me-I’m mentally a 12-yr.old boy.
She can have a ring wraith. They can go on cleanses together.
Perfect. She already almost looks like one.
Poor Orli, he just got rid of Goop Light and now people are trying to set him up with the Grand Goop? What has he done to deserve this? Goop has been with Viggo?? Damn, that makes me think just a little bit less of Aragorn 🙁
No don’t believe it! My precious…I refuse to believe it.
NEVA! Did not happen! Lies, lies, lies …sob…
Well it has to be Aragon because Orcs doesn’t taste too nice, don’t they, precious?
Well that was before he was King and just a murder for hire. As you can see that didn’t end well for him so I like to think he was born again as King Aragorn which washed him cleaned of all that Goop.
I dunno. There might have been some leftover Goop in the Land of Mordor.
ew!
I think after all the time spent with Miranda Kerr poor Orly deserves someone a bit less egomaniac and not so self centered.
I know i’m saying something celebrities probably have never heard of… but Goop how about some time alone? That might help!
p.s I’m DYING to read the post about Kim Kardashian’s last shopping spree with her pimp mother. She’s is wearing somehting out of this world. Truly amazing. Baffling i’d say.
I was going to say, isn’t it a little soon?
Yeah I was thinking too soon as well, but if it’s been over for a while (years?) then maybe not so much.
Well, that’s true. What am I talking about, she was already dating other people when she was married. Lol
@Paola – and I want an article on the one with Kimmy Kartrashian buying all the Vogues she can find just the other day. You would think she wouldn’t want anyone to are that her Klan had been artificially jacking up sales numbers.
Yes!! But how many copies should she buy to actually make a difference in the sales numbers?
That’s crazy! I can imagine Kanye driving a rented pickup and just loading it up with the stock of every bookstore/newsstand in a 30-mile radius of wherever they live.
Ha ha ha, oh I needed that laugh this morning. No way is this true, I think Goop would think he’s beneath her.
Viggo denies, denies, denies that ever happened and I choose to believe the lie because.. *shudders*
Okay I’m only going to post one more time here lest I seem a touch *obsessed* but no no no Viggo. I mean, he’s Viggo. No. Also: why the ffff am I singing some go Ninja song, blue marie?! 😛
Ha ha, I’m sorry about that but that dang macaroni commercial gets me every time. Damn that Vanilla Ice!!
(Give me a minute and I’m sure I’ll move on to some equally annoying song.)
I think Goop is too snooty to go for him – I imagine she’ll be on the hunt for some kind of corporate billionaire type guy.
I think so too.
I wonder if she’ll end up dating some billionaire that a lot of other Hollywood actresses have dated/
OF course, darling. Let’s not be gauche!!
But it is funny to think that (if it were true) Jennifer thinks she deserves Orlando Bloom.
That one fine day, she sat down and thought about who Goop was as a woman, and thought that her equivalent was Legolas… How. gauche!!!
I can imagine that conversation…*Goop bitch face*, and then Goop responds with a bitchy, “Thanks darling. You know what I keep asking myself?! How did you and I both date William? …. Oh, sorry, I forgot you call him by his nickname… I meant Brad, darling. How did that happen, I honestly don’t get it. *chuckles* Aaah, Jennifer, get it together, I love you!!”
Goop doesn’t business with the small, darlings!!
I read that Orly and Liv Tyler got together. To me (based on totally superficial stuff) they seemed like a good match. But apparently not?
I didn’t know that Goop and JA were pals…wasn’t Goop engaged to Brad for awhile before getting with JA????
Jen invited Goop to her Christmas party last year so I would say they are at least Hollywood friends. Also Goop and Brad were over before he got with Jen, why should there be any hard feelings between the two of them.
YEah there’s a collection of them….women pushing 40(I’m 40 too) who were all cheated on/dumped by Hollywood players and actors. They get together regularly and trash talk and plot everyone’s demise.
Of those, Aniston and Goop at the least are far from having clean hands in the area of keeping one’s hands off men in committed relationships. Yuck.
Exactly!!!
Then again, Mrs Pitt!!!
Gwen dated, William Bradley, don’t you know?! Not common old Brad… Let’s not be gauche!!
Well, Justin and Orlando are friendly……
Come to think of it aren’t Goop and Justin friendly through Iron Man as well?
Its six degrees of Goop!
And Kevin Huvane is Orlando’s US agent…….
Was it even a full year between Brad’s emotional breakup with Gwyneth in June 1997 and his ‘blind date’ with Jennifer in early May 1998?
They are both repped by Stephen Huvane. So there is that connection.
Ah, just imagine….the bland and the blonde.
Which is which?
I’m calling BS. First off, are Jennifer and Goop really even friends? Goop was once engaged to Brad Pitt; do they sit around and Brad-bash over carb-free, wheatgrass mojitos or something?
Also, I was really wishing and hoping that the rumour about Orly and Liv Tyler was an actual ‘thing’. I think they’d be lovely together.
Agree. How random. Typical tabloid nonsense quoting mysterious “sources.” Nothing rings true about the story.
As I said above I think they are Hollywood friends. Jen invited Goop to her Christmas party last year which she attended with Chris Martin.
Why should it matter if they both dated Brad? Goop and Brad was over before Brad got with Jen. Not all women are catty like that. It’s not like Jen and Goop were friends back then and Jen started dating her friends’ ex.
Oh contraire! Nothing like a mutual ex to bring 2 catty women together. They can bash the ex and the new gf!
Exactly…. Balls, they might have already done that.
On the contrary… They sit around eating a hot plate of air, while Chelsea mixes up some drinks, an they all gather around the fire place and engage in Angie-bashing instead. Angie is so gauche, don’t you know?! Lara Croft and all, darling!!
Don’t be gauche!!
I imagine that’s not a huge problem in Hollywood. Haven’t they all dated each other? I’m betting it’s like a small town, where if you won’t speak to any of your exes or any of your exes’ exes, there aren’t many people left to talk to.
I can’t see Jen and Gwyn being terribly close, but I doubt it has much to do with relationships that ended years ago. I just struggle picturing a childfree pothead and a pseudointellectual organic foods mom having much to say to each other besides industry talk.
This was my conscious uncoupling wish: a GOOP and Orly hookup. Watch that clamoring bag of bones we call Kate Bosworth explode.
More pictures of Aniston chasing that Oscar by fugging up. *eye roll* The woman plays Rachel in every damn movie she does.
I think the only movie I have enjoyed her in was “Horrible Bosses” and that’s becasue it wasn’t an Aniston movie.
Yeps, me too. That was surprisingly good. (I also hate Friends, but I usually keep it in secret since I’m surrounded by a hardcore fan base).
I know what you mean, minime. One of my aunts has all of the seasons on dvd AND every time she watches tv, she’s watching reruns. I never found the show all that funny, and was perplexed as to how a show that is set in New York doesn’t have at least two of the ‘friends’ as minorities, or at least some semi-regular/supporting roles.
The only movies I enjoyed of hers were way back…office space and good girl. Against type and right after Friends ended. After those 2 she went back to being Rachel.
Hell no. If this is true, orly needs to run for it.
Now the Peggy Olsen remark was absolutely amazing ! LOL
Ridiculous
Gimli could show Goop a good time.
YOU’RE ALL MISSING THE BEST CONNECTION!!!! Chris Martin banged Kate Bosworth -what – 2009/10?? Kate Bosworth was desperately, hopelessly, swooningly in love with Legolas for five years- waiting for the ring. Goop banging Orly would be a not-so-subtle dish served cold revenge tactic, and the cherry on top of her divorce proceedings.
Someone up feed pointed it out through the 6 degrees of Goop.
I don’t see it as passive aggressive to set up your friends, even if you like doing it when you are in relationships. I actually wish more of my married friends would do that four our single friends.
It can be a little passive-aggressive, depending on the person and the motivation. I’ve had some proposed set ups that were pretty obviously motivated by a desire to do coupley double dates rather than try to fit a single friend into a schedule, and some others that seemed a lot like a friend justifying her choice of spouse by insisting others around her date very similar men. Other set ups are well-meaning attempts to introduce people who genuinely might like each other.
Elijah would NEVER.
Sean Bean might. I have the hots for him in a bad way, but he seems a little Gerald Butler-esque in his standards, or lack thereof.
As for Orlando Bloom — I can’t imagine. Their combined lack of charisma might cause a singularity that swallowed all of Hollywood.
Orlando Bloom is a certified ho. He f——s anything/everything and cheats on anything/everything simultaneously. Maybe he would be a good match for Gwyn.
You’ve got any receipts for this? And anything? Are you saying he’s bisexual? I’m only asking because this comment was added in an already dead post with no proof whatsoever. Miranda Kerr fans seem to be spreading these kind of rumors all over the place after her career did an amazing dive into desperation.