I put this in the links yesterday because I didn’t feel like going full-on Goop, but here we go again. Gwyneth Paltrow is all over the place this week. She’s apparently in the new season of Lisa Kudrow’s Web Therapy, where Kudrow plays a terrible therapist doling out advice via web cam. Kudrow has actually gotten some really great actors to guest as “patients” including Lily Tomlin, Meryl Streep, Alan Cumming, Jane Lynch, Steve Carell, and many more. Apparently, Gwyneth is playing an angry, petty yoga guru/New-Age healer type. Should be good! There’s also this video that Tracy Anderson posted of her friend Goop doing some kind of dance-exercise. I’ll admit, Goop is pretty coordinated. If I tried to do this, I would fall down.
Right? There was also a video this week of Gwyneth and Chris Martin having dinner and she lovingly stroked his cheek or something. I have no idea why people continue to make a big deal about Chris and Gwyneth’s relationship post-uncoupling. They have dinner together all the time. They’re successfully co-parenting. And Gwyneth doesn’t care for Jennifer Lawrence, so of course she’s keeping Chris a little bit closer these days. But of course, Goop is still getting some from a lover on the side. Shhh! Don’t tell anyone.
Gwyneth Paltrow and “American Horror Story” producer Brad Falchuk are openly a couple when they circulate among Hollywood VIPs, insiders say. They are “openly dating, but behind closed doors,” said an insider, who added that entertainment pros know them as a couple. “They go to private Hollywood parties together.”
Paltrow and Falchuk — who also produces “Glee,” on which Paltrow has guest-starred — reportedly spent time together over the summer in LA and the Hamptons, and went on a Utah vacation after Paltrow “consciously uncoupled” from her Coldplay hubby Chris Martin. (Rumors had also burbled before that Falchuk was regularly traveling to London to spend time with the Goop guru.)
Politically correct exes Paltrow and Martin were seen out for a family dinner Wednesday in LA, and she was affectionately stroking the singer’s face as they parted ways after. Perhaps having a new man is part of the reason Paltrow seems so unconcerned with Martin’s dating much-younger Oscar winner Jennifer Lawrence? Reps didn’t get back to us.
It’s sort of shocking to me that Gwyneth hasn’t gotten any amount of crap for “homewrecking” Brad Falchuk’s marriage, not to mention her own. I mean, I feel pretty confident that Gwyneth and Chris were both screwing around pre-uncoupling, but from what I’ve heard, Brad and his wife did not have the same kind of open-marriage agreement. As for Brad and Gwyneth being “openly dating, behind closed doors”… sure, okay. At least we know they’re still together. For now.
Photos courtesy of WENN.
Openly dating, but behind closed doors. Hm. There’s a joke in there, but I’m too brain dead to figure it out. Abbot, requesting backup immediately.
Open dating but behind closed doors … I don’t even know what that means!
Someone please provide a goop-life translator, asap!
I know, right? I’ve exhausted my snark reserves on this one. I did watch the IG vid tho and giggled. Is that like Britney Zumba Hop?
translation: “i don’t want the peasants judging me for homewrecking, as that image would not be congruent with the one i cultivate (being a calm, cleansed, higher-level human). “
It must be some super secret celebrity club that has closed doors. You have to show your “do you know who I am?” card to get in. I hear the mozzarella sticks are lousy.
Obviously it’s behind Sliding Glass Doors since everyone knows about it.
(This is only funny if you get my reference)
zing!
YAY!
Somebody got it!!!
😎
Good one!
Conscientiously inconspicuous.
It’s as clear as mud…
I want to know where all the eyebrow police are today. Stay away from Rene Zellweger, and look at that dude committing a felony frown.
ETA: behind closed doors, but openly, says sex VIDEO/tape to the cloud, if you ask me.
How can you concern yourself with eyebrows when there is choreography that must be perfected?!
This tape will be better curated than a hurricane of humming birds consciously corrupting a coreopsis, while an ethereal wind blows around a plethora of plantations. And ‘That’s good thing’.
She can sure keep her stuff on the down low when she wants to. People always thought it was Chris who engineered that but now we see it was really Gwen.
This guy creeps me out because he looks like that Kardashian bestie Cheban.
Oh yeahhhh Like a Pretty Cheban with a Chin
Every time i see this guy’s name, I think of Bill Haverchuck from Freaks and Geeks. I really wish she were dating him instead.
Anyone else feel like they are going to consciously couple again soon? I mean I don’t know many exes that move across the street, throw birthday bashes and don’t file for divorce or separation no matter how amicable. I don’t even think Chris and Jen are even a thing (we have no evidence to say they are just a bunch of crap that gets proven false over and over) and I honestly think they are trolling the media at this point.
@Alex: You know, I agree with you…all signs seem to point to Martin and Paltrow getting back together. As much as I refused to believe that Jennifer Lawrence is serious about Martin, I do believe they have or maybe now, had been dating.
I mentioned down thread that I hope that their relationship would be over by the New Year…now I’m wondering if maybe they have already broken up. Here’s hoping! LOL!. Am I alone in believing that the whole stroking the face thing was staged?…Paltrow saw an opportunity, right?…and ran with it.
This whole quadrangle is just plain odd. No divorce has been filed for, but they are “uncoupled”. If I were Lawrence, I would run. Maybe Martin is just being a good dad and trying to be nice to his “spouse”, but if I was the girlfriend, I would not like all of the loving public gestures that make it look like they are still “coupled”. Paltrow seems to have all the cards–read kids– and she is keeping him on a short leash while she still has her “closed sliding glass door” side piece, and does not want to look like a “homewrecker”, but a loving mother and generous Ex. Lawrence has a big film to promote and maybe she does not want her relationship or lack thereof to be the biggest topic of discussion. Who knows what is really going on, but I just find it strange on all sides.
As for Chris and Jen we haven’t seen anything that points to a relationship at all. Some well place sources at places no one ever sees them at? Plus the inaccurate stories has me believing this was a whole lot of nothing. I mean the media was spinning its wheels over the hottest new relationship and it baffles me that no one has caught them on an actual date (and the plane pics don’t count those were a clear set up). Yet we see Chris and GP every time they are together (including at their houses) and Jen alone quite a bit lately? So something is off here
If they were a thing it couldn’t be more than casual because I doubt Jen wants to deal with his baggage and she just got out of a serious relationship. And for me Chris and GP’s super closeness has me thinking they will get back together OR some great woman would have to be ready to deal with this mess. And I don’t believe that’s Jen.
Alex, if it’s just a PR relationship I’m really excited how they will announce the split! 😉
I think it’s the opposite. I think Gwynnie & Chris are so, so over each other and probably have been for a long time. Ever been in a long term relationship where you start seeing that person more as your brother than your lover? I have, and we stayed close friends, but the thought of ever being romantic with him grosses me out! They fell out of love, grew apart, and aren’t attracted to each other anymore.
Yeah, because that’s the goopy m.o. Open closedness. Uncommitted marriage. Non-smoking smoker. Meat eating vegan. Family focused homewrecker. Unenlightened enlightenment.
It makes the eyes cross doesn’t it? So much pointless subterfuge.
she is the reigning queen of “do as i say, not as i do” and always has been.
i loathe to think of how (hypocritically) bossy she is in real life since she manages to be 100000000% insufferable publicly with her “helpful” decrees.
i bet she holds her crown on with eyes closed and both hands clenched tight.
It’s called hypocrisy. Definition: The practice of claiming to have moral standards or beliefs to which one’s own behavior does not conform; pretense.
Gwyneth didnt or doesn’t get attacked for wrecking a relationship for the same reason Jennifer Aniston doesn’t. They both share the same of agent Huvane.
Huvane is notoriously known to blackmail publishing houses to make sure his clients don’t get any diss about personal lives. If they attack one of his clients then he will withdraw interviews privileges of his other clients.
It is known that Gwyneth wrecked Brad’s marriage and that has been brushed under the robe.
Jennifer publically wrecked Justin’s relationship and even posted pictures of them together. And yet she has been given the glove treatment by the media.
I didn’t know that Gwennie stole Brad from another woman when they were dating. Details, please…
Gwyneth is starting to look like Ruth Madoff. No more tanning for her, geez
Damn you Tracy Anderson. That actually looks fun!
Nah, still see Jonathan Cheban. God knows I need help for even knowing who that is.
Good Lord does Goop have a smug looking mug or what?.
Also, yay to Kaiser for reminding people that Goop broke up Falchucks’ marriage. Goop doesn’t care for Jennifer Lawrence? (which is more than likely true)…well, I get the feeling that Jennifer Lawrence doesn’t give a flying f— at a rolling donut what Goop thinks. Though, I really hope this relationship whether serious or not, is over by the new year.
They look alike- both look so pinched around the eyes- bet they’re both neurotic.
…..is this code for ‘no anal yet’ ?
Lol so wrong. I think it’s code for, we have mutually decided that until my feng shui apple orchard has been fully harvested by the ethically sourced brown people, he will not be putting it in my pooper.
Hahahahahaah
OH.MY.GOD. LOLOLOL.
I’m almost thinking their “open marriage” was going to be exposed, so she opted for the false “conscience uncoupling”… But they are still very much married, sleeping together, and keeping everything the same – except NOW the press can’t say it’s “cheating”
@SEAPHARRIS7: Yes, that is exactly what I believe is going on.
This is by far the most interesting theory I’ve ever read about GP: that she and CM are in an open marriage, each of them fully understanding that the other will have sidepieces from time to time, but still living with one another (or in the same compound/residence or whatever) and having the same marriage they always did. This makes both of them much more interesting, and — not progressive, but non-normative — than I thought they were.
that actually makes tons of sense. they knew someone was going to come out with a story so they beat them to it, but never filed for divorce. then they can publicly reconcile when it is convenient for them or for PR or when another story comes out. interesting.
God, I cannot hate this woman. On the contrary, I find her amusing.
goop will always come out on top. I’ve said this before. always.
@NEV: No….she will catch a lot of heat for breaking up a ten year marriage. Falchuck and his wife have children as well. It will only add to people already loathing Paltrow.
She’s been looking quite smug lately.
As far as I am concerned, there ain’t enough locks in the WORLD to keep them away from my eyes. He looks like a member of The LiveEvil Doll Club, slithering down off the shelf in the middle of the night to eat aw hamburger or something. Also, awesome dance moves, G. If one of Brit’s backup backup dancers twists an ankle, you are so in.
Jen G and Jen L both aged better and look fresher and younger in their forties than Ben Affleck’s first love, Gwyneth.
It is pretty impressive that she managed to use Martin Lawrence to deflect from her own missteps, which is why I commented to a friend awhile back that I dearly hoped the whole “gluten free” commentary by Lawrence wasn’t intentional shade but just a badly thought statement. Because Paltrow? Like her or hate her, she knows how to play the game, and she’s been in it a long time. I don’t know if Lawrence is at that level or even has it in her to be that level of bitch. (For that matter, is any man really worth it?)
So, Gwynnie…should I vote for Evan Falchuk instead of Martha Coakley?
Gwen has no dignity or honor. Terrible that she wrecked this man’s marriage and hurt his wife and children like that. Karma is a bitch tho…she’ll get hers.