Jason Patric scored a new victory in his fight for custodial rights of his son, Gus, age 4. This case is so messy and acrimonious. Jason hasn’t seen Gus in 2 years after splitting with Danielle Schreiber. The two dated for many years, and Jason apparently gave Danielle his sperm the first time they broke up. The agreement was confusing. Even though Jason signed over all custodial rights, he later revealed that he and Danielle only used IVF because they couldn’t get pregnant on their own. They reconciled. Danielle welcomed Jason back into Gus’ life, and they did happy family beach photo ops.
After a second breakup, Danielle told Jason to get lost. Things grew complicated. A court denied him custody rights as “a sperm donor.” Jason launched the Stand Up for Gus foundation to raise awareness for parental alienation. He appealed the case and insisted he was “a willing co-parent.” The appellate court ruled that Jason no longer had no parental rights (sorry about the double negative), and the case went back to trial court level. To complicate matters, Danielle came forward at the 11th hour with allegations of abuse and anti-Semetic remarks. Like I said, this is a total cluster. TMZ reports that the trial court has ruled that Jason is the legal father of Gus, which means father and son shall be reunited:
Jason Patric just won a 2-year legal battle against his baby mama — a judge just declared he is the legal father of 4-year-old Gus … TMZ has learned.
Jason had a baby with ex-GF Danielle Schreiber, and after breaking up, going back and breaking up again, she fought hard against his bid to become the legal father, citing a quirky law.
According to the law … if a man donates sperm to a woman to whom he is not married and a doctor facilitates the insemination … the man has NO claim of custody or parental rights.
The trial judge ruled against Jason, he appealed and the appellate court said the trial judge was off base and sent it back for another hearing.
The second time was a charm for Jason. We’ve learned the trial judge just issued a sealed, 45-page opinion, concluding Jason is the legal father.
The judge ordered Jason, Danielle and their lawyers to try and hash out a custody, visitation and support agreement, but if they can’t the judge will make the decisions.
This case became a rallying cry for father’s rights — enormous victory for Jason.
UPDATE: Schreiber’s rep tells TMZ, “The proposed statement of decision is not intended to be public nor is it final.”
[From TMZ]
I don’t know what to make of that update from Danielle’s rep. Perhaps she plans on appealing this case yet again. I’m happy for Jason and Gus even though there’s a residual unease over Danielle’s allegations of abuse. This case should make interesting waves for other potential sperm-donor cases. TMZ says the trial opinion is 45 pages, so there’s likely a very strict window of cases where this case can set a precedent. Maybe? We shall see.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet & WENN
I think if these abuse allegations are just a ploy in this case, as we suspect, she is despicable. I think to use the legal system in this way is, in large part, what is wrong with the current state of affairs in America. Using hard fought precedent to protect mothers from sperm donors coming after them for parental rights against a father who is able and willing to be in his child’s life is deplorable. Keeping a child away from a parent on either side in this way is selfish beyond words.
Yeah, no. He comes across as a scumbag and a rage monkey plus he’s saying an awful of MRAish tripe.
how so? Can you provide some links/proof? i havent heard a thing about him being abusive until he tried to get some parental rights. please provide your proof of his abuse, I do not want to support an abuser. it just seems to me if he was, we would have heard about it. where can i find this info?
The problem with *some* MRA rhetoric is that sometimes, men *do* get screwed over in family court. The system favors mothers because more often than not, women are not in a power position in the dissolving relationship and it’s easy for the more powerful male partner to take advantage in that way, but occasionally that means that a good and willing father gets the shaft. That doesn’t make MRAs right, it just means that there’s a kernel of something real among all the rest of their dumb beliefs, which is what makes them dangerous, IMO. They can sound relevant, sometimes.
I don’t know if I can post links here but Vanessa Grigoriadis’ Rolling Stones piece heavily details the abuse Danielle suffered. His anger issues coupled with his vile MRA beliefs make me deeply afraid for Danielle and her son, Gus.
Tempest In a Test Tube: Jason Patric’s Brutal Custody Battle
http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/news/tempest-in-a-test-tube-jason-patrics-brutal-custody-battle-20140715
Here Is Jason Patric’s Anti-Semitic Email To His Ex-Girlfriend
http://www.buzzfeed.com/kateaurthur/jason-patric-anti-semitic-email-custody-yuck
If she wanted him as just a sperm donor than she should not have brought him into her son’s life. That makes no sense. The child deserves a father and not to have one temporarily and then have him yanked away.
I agree. While he was a “sperm donor” at the beginning, they reconciled and she allowed him to assume the role of father in the child’s life, going way beyond what a sperm donor would do. So now she is stuck with the consequences of her action in allowing Patric to take on the role of father.
Still no winners here. Both sides will be using this child against the other instead of coming together for the child.
Both parents here did things they shouldn’t have for selfish reasons. And neither looks like they’ve understood what they did wrong and why it was wrong.
Great the little guy has his father in his life. Too bad it’ll create more unease in his life as a result. And that unease will come from the spiteful nature of the mother and the father.
Exactly. How sad for this little boy.
Amen FLORC.
That’s how I feel as well. I hope at some point, before it’s too late, they both decide to grow up and get along for the sake of the kid.
Hopefully after some time passes (maybe years?), they will get on with their lives and stop being so focused on their failed relationship. Then they will get along OK and the child will be better off.
Many people–including folks on this site–predicted the abuse allegations were coming after Jason won that minor legal victory, so I’m hesitant to call him abusive. I thought the claims smacked of a last-ditch effort for a childish woman to get her way. Until there is something that substantiates Danielle’s claims, I’m happy that Jason is making progress in his bid to see his son.
+1
The fact that at one point she was fine having Jason in Gus’ life, then when they broke up claimed he was just a sperm donor is totally sketchy. This man has been fighting so hard to be in his son’s life, that says something. I’m happy for him. And Gus will one day be able to understand everything his Dad went through to be apart of his life.
Exactly! This case is unique — he WAS Gus’s daddy after the child was born.
They did NOT have a written agreement, so if she wanted to keep him just as a donor she should not have entered a relationship with him again and encouraged her son to call him daddy. You real what you sow.
If he’s ok to be the dad once you’re dating, then why not after the break up?
Also, whether he was abusive her is not the same time as whether he’d be abusive to the child. My dad was abusive to my mom during their marriage but as a father he wasn’t. Awful, but it was the truth. She’d need to show specific examples abusive behavior towards Gus in order to claim he shouldn’t have parental rights.
Any father who abuses the mother of their children IS abusing those kids. He’s teaching boys to abuse women and he’s teaching girls that they can’t hope for better treatment than what Mom got from Daddy.
Missing the forest for the trees. It’s easy to making sweeping statements but my life experience negates what you are saying.
Sure, some men who are abusive jerks are abusive to everyone in their lives. But people do not treat every person they come across the same way! Putting the abuse issue aside — it is true that someone can be a great friend, a wonderful worker, a good brother, and a horrible romantic partner (uncommunicative, selfish, taking their partner for granted, etc)!
So unless there is PROOF that he will abuse the boy and/or now that his romantic relationship with mom is over he will poison the boy with mean spirited remarks about the mom THEN there is room for concern.
That’s probably why the judge ruled this way. If she’d never reconciled with Jason Patric, we wouldn’t be talking about it. But at one point, she let them play happy families and then tried to take it all back when they broke up.
I agree with fairy, a child seeing/hearing a father beat a mother IS child abuse. They should not have to witness that.
However, I do not believe he beat her. It is way too suspicious that she was fine with him and there was no abuse allegations until AFTER he won the first minor victory. Why not share that fact before? it is rare for me not to believe an alleged victim but in this case I do not. She doesn’t have photos of abuse and the timing is way too suspicious to me. I think he should be in the child’s life.
Good for him. There is nothing magical about having a uterus… Fathers deserve the same rights as mothers. The child does not belong to her; he is not a possession. She sounds like an a-hole and maybe this child would be better off with him. Go Patric!
Well said.
Agreed!
Agreed!
While I agree with that, and think that I am pro-Patric given what little we actually know, I will say that while there is nothing magical about the uterus, the one with the uterus is usually the one who doesn’t have the luxury of drifting in and out of their children’s lives. He was happy to initially sign-away any claim to the child, and later became attached. Women who do that are treated to so much more harshly. It seems like men get to play father when it is convenient sometimes, and all is forgiven when they want to come back and actually stay. So I get when woman get angry about that. But even then, I think he should be given a chance here because the circumstances are so unusual.
Agreed! There are so many single moms out there wishing a father wanted to be part of their kids’ lives. It’s just all around yucky. I hope this boy gets to have both his parents in his life.
sure just like Jian Ghomeshi fans blame the victims and until there’s enough women (nine and counting) relating similar stories of abuse to stand together. Why is it the woman who is painted as a vindictive, shrill woman who will scream abuse to gain her objective. Maybe she decided she had nothing to lose, perhaps she spoke about the abuse when she had little or no alternatives. There are scores of articles on the internet to why a woman does not report sexual abuse. None of us were in the relationship, none of us witnessed what happened between them. So none of us should point fingers..
No, but this is one woman saying this, and Jason Patric has nowhere near the power and influence Jian Ghomeshi wielded. Patric’s court case was publicized widely enough that if, as appears to be the case with Ghomeshi, there had been a pattern of abuse, women would have been pouring out of the woodwork – as they have been in the Ghomeshi situation. It’s not the same at all.
It’s a sticky situation. I was reading something yesterday where the author of the article basically said it was a long time coming for Jian Ghomeshi and you could tell that by how many people came out of the woodwork after the initial Poor Jian phase. Basically, what he said was that when someone is that horrible that once something breaks, it implodes very quickly. In this case, there has been nothing. It is he said/she said. But he definitely has enough evidence in the videos of her pointing to him and saying Where’s Dada? to prove that he was more than a sperm donor. As to the abuse and all of that, until some other evidence comes about, it is really hard to say in this case. Abuse can be so hidden. Look how long Jian Ghomeshi got away with it. In Jason Patric’s case, who knows? Before all of this he struck me as arrogant, even though he was my teenage crush. But is this case of vindictiveness or one of abuse? I guess we may never know.
Yeah, but relationships are different. Nobody believes the woman, and Patric here is is not only semi famous, he comes from an Old Hollywood family. There’s definitely a power imbalance.
because she didn’t mention any abusive actions by him until he tried to get some visitation/custody rights. seems pretty convenient. she had him donate his sperm instead of using an anonymous sperm donor, is in a relationship with him, has him around the kid and calling him daddy. then they break up, jason tries to get parental rights and all of a sudden, he’s an abusive a-hole? gmafb. that smacks of a vindictive beyotch using anything to gain a footing in a custody battle. he was good enough to be daddy when she was fu&cking him. now that they’re broken up, he’s not?!
Rosalee — to be fair the women were anonymous during the beginning of the Ghomeshi shit. They weren’t suing him. When you’re going through legal battles and only bring up the abuse after you start losing some of those battles, it does looks suspect. Nothing about the women in the Ghomeshi shitstorm seemed suspect to me. Those women were not trying to gain anything other than to be heard at that point. Some of them ended up being approached by reporters, rather than reaching out to the media themselves. I followed that early on, and believe me, I was infuriated at all of the comments in regards to these women. It made me so angry, and so sad. I stood by those women from day one.
I don’t think this case can be compared – at least not exactly. The thing is, this woman – if she was absolutely against him being in the childs’ life due to abuse, could have pushed that from the beginning to protect her son. I know that abuse cases are difficult because victims are afraid – and I am in no way saying that she was not abused. But she has made the abuse claim look suspicious given that it was only brought up when he started winning some things – and if she is an abused woman, her lawyers suck. I feel like that is something that would have been asked when getting their ducks in a row for reasoning why she didn’t want him in the childs’ life. If she was abused, I hope she is able to get the counseling necessary, and can find a way to get him out of the child’s life. If she was not, I hope he gains as much access to the child as he wants.
Totally different. Jian was the very definition of a missing stair. Everyone knew about this guy and what he was doing and it was ignored because he was so powerful and had the ability to completely transform someone’s career. Jason Patric has absolutely no power in HW and has barely acted in five years. And if this woman had come forward with this before he pushed for his parental rights I would be taking her side more than I am.
I’m happy for the child. He will grow up knowing he has a father who loves him and is part of his life, not a hole in his little heart.
From my own personal standpoint I’m going to come down on Jason’s side here. I have a complicated relationship with my father and my former step-father who were never really present. So, to have a father that wants to fight to see his child and be in his life makes me sympathetic. My brother in law who was divorced a few years ago has been cut out of his children’ s lives by the mother despite his repeated attempts to remain in their lives. She changes numbers, moves without telling him, tells the kids horrible untrue stories about him to the point that they don’t want to see him anymore. She even keeps the kids from seeing their elderly grandmother. Unfortunately he cannot afford to fight her in court on all of these things. She’s done really deplorable things to him just to be spiteful. And who loses in the end? The children do. That’s the most despicable thing to me. I’m a divorced Mom and thank goodness my ex and I can co parent peacefully for our child’s sake.
I do not know the particulars of the case, but in any circumstance I can not see that man wanting to be a father to his biological son who has only one parent (right?) could be a bad thing. I do not think he would want to be a father this much if he did not love Gus.
I think having more love in his life is a good thing for Gus.
His mother sounds selfish. She wanted to parent alone but when she got back together with Patric she encouraged her child to call him daddy. You can’t have it both ways.
Father and son have bonded now. It’s not a clear cut case. She should have gone to the sperm bank if she wanted the father to have zero involvement with the child.
My ex is a complete deadbeat who hasn’t spoken to our daughter in a year and hasn’t seen her in 2 years by his own choice. So to see a father who is willing to fight this hard for his child makes him very sympathetic to me. I don’t know all the details of their case or relationship but it appears that she wanted him in the picture when it was convenient for her and out of her life when it wasn’t. I think it is very telling that she didn’t come forward with her allegations of abuse and anti semitism until after he started gaining ground in their legal battle, it absolutely makes her look suspect in my opinion. I see no reason why the man shouldn’t be allowed to be a father to his son.
I agree. When they broke up, she said she would allow him to see him, but she didn’t want him to have legal rights as the father, and that’s when it went downhill.
The thing is she’s the one that had him in in her life with him being the baby’s father, being called daddy, and a relationship. He says he was in the child’s life from it seems like the beginning. The child looked to him as his daddy. You can’t unring the bell.
I do admire the fact that he fought so hard. Jason isn’t some big movie star making a lot of money, far from it. The fact that he has spent probably a fortune fighting to be his father speaks to how much he cares. That can only benefit the child, to have a strong father figure in his life.
A lot of times these guys fight just to screw the mom over. They use the kid to maintain a hold over the woman. I wouldn’t be surprised if he gets what he wants and promptly hands the kid off to a nanny….or the classic “second wife/girlfriend.”
yes, that’s it. the fact that she used him as a sperm donor instead of an anonymous one, shows she obviously thought he was alright at some point. he was alright enough to be in a relationship with her and act as a dad to the kid. but she cuts him off from contact and he’s the bad one trying to control her and screw her? yeah, no
And sometimes, women are the as*hole in the story and fight just to screw the father over.
Equality is Equality. Let’s not be unfair.
Normally, I would be against this since there was a contract in place, BUT she allowed him to father this child for a time, probably let the kid call his “daddy”… if he wants to be a father to his son, then that’s better than the alternative.
There is something really creepy about Patric. I don’t believe his story, but I’m not surprised so many here do. Women are not given the benefit of the doubt.
In custody situations, women were almost always given preference and the benefit of the doubt until very recently.
That is not entirely true though. Pre-20th century in the case of a divorce, men were actually given custody. And the reality in most cases, men agree to whatever custody plan is in place. If a man doesn’t have custody, there is usually a reason like abuse or some other legal problem. Although even if there is abuse, sometimes a man is still given partial custody, sometimes with tragic results.
That’s only recent and men have only themselves to blame. Whoever did the most childcare gets custody. Most men still do very little childcare, but even so when they fight for custody, they get it. And men are more likely to lie when they allege abuse by the mother.
When kids could be used as unpaid labor in times past, THEN fathers got custody——always.
@merritt. ” pre-twentieth century divorce “? Was there such a thing? My recollection is that divorce was hard to get prior to 1950’s. There aren’t very many cases of 19th century divorces, are there ? How do you know the statistics on those? In the 1890’s My great, great grandmother left her husband’s home because he was sleeping with the help, and she couldn’t get a divorce nor could he divorce her. He claimed she had mental problems. His wife and kids lived in the same small town and shunned him. It’s not until she died that he got the son and daughter back. I’ve been told this story many times and I’m curious about your info.
Man, I wish I could let someone give birth then have 3 years of fun then get to still have legal status over my child.
You make it sound like he was not in the kids life at all. He was. The kid was calling him dada or something similar to that. I’d agree with you if he had handed over the sperm, and ditched – THEN wanted to be involved. But they were together as a family for some time before they broke up again and she cut him out.
exactly.
He did initially ditch, which makes the story more complicated. Not arguing against the result, only the point that he immediately took responsibility and started playing dad.
What do we all think about the “quirky law” that created this whole situation? (Quirky law: If the parties are not married, the boyfriend/partner/whatever is treated like a sperm donor, not a contributing partner to the fertility treatments)
That law is the root of the problems in the case. There has to be a way to protect legit sperm donors but in this case she tried to have the best of both worlds – he was a father when it worked for her and a sperm donor when it did not. It would be interesting to see how the judge maneuvered around that law in the decision. Maybe based on legislative intent. I can’t imagine the law was intended to be used as she used it here.
That’s not what the law says, according to the article. If a guy hands over sperm and a doctor implants it or whatever, THEN he’s a sperm donor.
And the fact that they weren’t sleeping together at the time and have broken up repeatedly makes me wonder.
He was a sperm donor. There was a contract, and he did sign away his rights. This is not the case that they were boyfriend/girlfriend at the time of the pregnancy.
From what I read, I thought that he had donated while they were together and going through fertility treatments together. Then, after they split up, she used the donation. I think if he made the contribution while they were together, that really changes things.
Definitely a unique situation, I think I’d be completely on her side if she hadn’t gotten back together with him for years and encouraged the father/son relationship. That’s what makes her seem vindictive, plus they were together for so long before they did the IVF, why would you go through that to have a child with someone who was abusive? I can understand if she got pregnant naturally, but she went to great lengths to have his child after they were broken up, and when they got back together she had no problem letting him be a father. Jason definitely gives off a creepy vibe, but the dude obviously loves his son very much and hasn’t given up, she should just let it go and work out a peaceful agreement.
My daughter’s father chose to not be in her life for 3 years, when he came back I had to put my anger and resentment aside and do what was best for her, and I decided to be friendly and help him see her as much as possible. It’s been another 3 years and they have a great relationship, we all get along and even vacation together, sometimes you just have to let things go for the sake of your child.
Jess – I’m sure it was difficult, but you took the high road and made a better life for your child. I wish more people would be like you. You are truly a great mother. 🙂
Thank you so much BJF:)
I agree Bjf. Jess did a wonderful and selfless thing.
You’re a great mom Jess. My mom had to face similar issues with her father, and with the sperm donors of her kids. My grandfather was a shitty father–she told me that she felt like she was invisible when he was around–and there were SIX kids. He never asked her how her day was, what she learned at school, etc. She said that she felt like she didn’t matter to him at all. But he was an amazing grandfather–she put all of *that* aside, and let him be a grandfather to my older sister (he died when I was a baby). And my older sister is dealing with the same thing–but she’s still holding onto what her dad didn’t do, and it’s ruined whatever relationship my nephew and his grandfather could’ve had, because she’s constantly bringing up old shit.
I think you’re really understanding. I can’t imagine doing the same–although if I was in the same situation, I’d try to be the same. I’m still dealing with the fact that my douchebag sperm donor is/was only interested in talking to me AFTER he didn’t have to pay child support anymore (and for only 6 years, as opposed to 18).
That sounds like a tough situation with your sister, but it’s understandable as well, it’s so hard to let go sometimes, maybe she’ll get there eventually. When I start thinking about the past I remind myself that my daughter deserves better than what I had and I try keep myself in check.
And with your ex…ugh that makes me mad even reading it! Money is such a huge factor and stressor when it comes to caring for children, some men just don’t see that and they resent giving us money, makes no sense. Hopefully he’s at least being nice to you!!
You sound like a great mom. You put your daughter first even though it must have been difficult.
You guys really made me smile, thank you all for your kind words, I needed them today!
I’m happy that this child will have an active, loving father. I hope his parents can learn to erase the bitterness and rage for the emotional health of their son.
i think they both sound equally selfish and both acted poorly
a rich guy traded his sperm and then it got complicated
I am happy anytime a man wants to be a father and is committed to doing so.
This is plain and simple:
If you want a sperm donor go to the sperm bank.
If your don’t want to be a father keep your sperm to yourself or get a vasectomy. Done
Danielle’s an idiot. What does she think her so will think when he’s older? Does she not think realistically?
I cannot see how any person can be on this woman’s side. She uses her boyfriend for a sperm donor, has a relationship with him, allows him around the kid and then tries to play the he’s just a sperm donor card. well if he was just a sperm donor to you, why would you have a relationship with him and allow him around your kid? SHE established him as a parental figure in the baby’s life and now she wants to rip him away from the baby? Disgusting, she should be ashamed of herself. as long as it benefited her, she was okay with him being in the baby’s life. NO ALLEGATIONS OF ABUSE. until the custody battle, how original. she’s a p.os. imo
AGREED! You forgot to mention that there were no allegations of abuse UNTIL He started MAKING GROUNDS in the custody battle. It’s not even like she brought that out from the beginning, only when she realized she might lose.
Look, I sympathize with her. But she set this up. She dated a man on and off who was an asshole to her a lot of the time and stayed with him for years. She claims he abused her. At one point he even did treatment to help his sperm so she could get pregnant when they were together and this was when she said he was horrible to her. She was co-dependent on him. She was trying to have a baby with a man she said was abusive and treating her awful. They broke up. She’s going to have a child on her own, and had a sperm donor picked out. He writes her a letter stating he wanted to give her that gift. He had a girlfriend. He wasn’t to be the father. Yet during the first year of the child’s life she allowed him to see him when he would visit. Then he wanted to get back together and she willingly jumped back in again with a man she said has major issues and admitted she had the child call him dada.
She is the one who opened all of these doors for him to be a legal part of the child’s life and now have to give up some custody to him for visitation. She has her own issues she needs to look at as to why she stayed involved with him, and choosing to use him as the sperm donor and still have him in her life after the child was born. If she really wanted to be a single parent, then she should have used an anonymous donor. She comes from a very wealthy family, so was able to fight this. But ultimately, it was the fact that she let him in the child’s life as a father figure and she just can’t undo that. Her son will hold it against her later on too if she does. The baby has a father who he knew and was bonded with, who is his biological father. She wants the world and her child to think Jason is awful, so that she can stay a single parent. I don’t know where the truth lies, because Jason disputes a lof of her allegations about him and says it’s just to keep him from the boy and win the case.
Ultimately, it’s about the best interests of the child, and the best interests is to know his father and have him be a part of his life.
Yeah. She needs to find some humility. As someone above put it she can’t “unring the bell”. He may be a jerk with issues BUT SO IS SHE. And guess what, neither of them is the first or last to have a child and realize it’s more than just bliss. It’s also sucking up what you want for what is best for the babe. And in this case she needs to understand that HE IS THE DAD. She acknowledged and championed it and can’t just decide he isn’t bc it no longer works for her. It’s not about her anymore. It’s about the boy!!!!!!!! Grow up, I say, to BOTH of them. Stop fighting in court and put that money in a trust so the boy can go to college (and a therapist)!!!!!
I’m very happy for him.
Re: the update from her lawyers. They call it a “proposed statement of decision,” which sounds like the judge has not issued a ruling yet, Frequently, a judge will indicate to the parties which way he intends to rule and then he’ll ask the prevailing party to draft a proposed decision. The judge will review it, cut out the parts he doesn’t like, add anything he thinks is necessary. So the document that TMZ has seen was probably drafted by Patric’s attorneys and has not been signed by the judge.
What the mother doesn’t see as she is blinded by her own personal anger is that the child will grow up to resent her for taking the father out of his life. This is in the news- and it will be public knowledge so soon enough (if she succeeded ) he would find out and know he had a dad that his mother didn’t let him see …and this father wanted him.
Let me get this straight. Unlike what she had initially leaked, Patric never actually signed anything relinquishing parental rights – instead she used genetic material from their attempts at IVF. She had a baby, they got back together, and now she’s trying to call him a sperm donor. And now she has paid an incredible fortune in lawyer’s fees trying to pull this legal shenanigan; she’s going to be lucky if she doesn’t end up on the hook for his fees as well.
Don’t encourage your son to call a man Daddy if he is only a Sperm Donor.