Months have passed since the second Ray Rice elevator video resulted in his indefinite suspension from the NFL. Rice has since been reinstated to active status and remains eligbile for hire with any team who will sign him. That hasn’t happened yet. There were immediate rumors that several teams were considering taking him on as a running back. The Baltimore Sun notes that Ray has not formally visited with any teams … yet. He still has a pending wrongful termination suit against the Baltimore Ravens. He wants his $3.5 million salary for the entire season. Will he get it?
New video footage has surfaced (courtesy of ABC News) of the Valentine’s Day gone wrong between Ray and his then-fiancée, Janay. This footage picks up after Janay regained consciousness. Janay appears very distressed as she sits in handcuffs. Flanked by security guards, the couple is seen kissing and nuzzling as they prepare to enter separate cars towards the police station. Here’s the new clip:
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This video is nearly as disturbing as the ones that showed Ray spitting on Janay and knocking her unconscious. More than Janay’s apologies and Ray’s insistence that they only had “one bad night,” this third video points towards domestic violence as a repeat occurrence between these two. This is Ray’s pattern — physical violence followed by a “honeymoon” phase. Ray’s publicist says the video only shows two lovers making up after a minor squabble, like it’s a totally acceptable thing. Nope, not buying it.
The Baltimore Sun also points out that Ray shouldn’t have been allowed to “make up” with Janay on the way to the police station. This display of affection certainly influenced what she said to officers. That’s probably why Ray tried to block ABC from releasing this video.
Photos courtesy of Getty, Fame/Flynet & WENN
Despicable!
It was always clear that she had been hit before — It’s all about that $$$$.
What do you mean it’s all about $?
Most likely the perception that she stands to lose as well if he does (if she divorces him, if he’s cut for good from football) because she’s living the high life off his millions and as a result is willing to work to ensure the checks keep rolling in so that she doesn’t have to downgrade her lifestyle either.
There are a lot of women who stay with abusive men that don’t have any $$$$$$ – It’s not about the $$$$$.
What an insensitive and crass thing to say.
ALSO, she could divorce him and take half his sh*t if this was all about $$$, as you so eloquently pointed out. This is not about money, but a cycle of abuse- both mentally and physically. Way to blame the victim. Bravo.
It’s a very ugly, but highly typical, way to blame the victim for the behavior of the abuser. She is somehow ‘equally responsible’ because she stays— whether for money, or no reason at all— but what most people don’t realizte is how mind-altering it is to be with someone who plays these games not only with your body but with your feelings, thoughts, and perception of everything. They have a jujitsu grip on your soul and it takes a long time for women to get out of it, if they can.
“A minor squabble”…whaaaat? A minor squabble is when my bf and I disagree over which movie to go see.
And then he knocks you out to make his point………………… according to the NFL. No biggie!
So Janay lied when she said she did not have anything to do with RR after he punched her unconscious.p, she said she did not speak to him all the way home because she was so angry with him for what he did to her. Saying that on camera, I guess was to make her look good on the Today interview.
It looks like Janay lied about a lot of things. Janay is (1) an abused woman; and (2) someone who doesn’t want to see her current lifestyle slip away,
You should have stopped at (1).
She’s an abused woman. Everything she’s done and said has been to make Ray Rice look good.
She’s a victim. She was told what to say by Rice’s PR team. The lie made their relationship look like a non abusive one with one shocking incident.
And there’s also the possibility that she literally didn’t remember what happened right after due to head trauma and alcohol consumption so she believed what she was told to say.
Demonizing Janay makes it easy to wash our hands of this horrible story. But it seems like she grew up in an abusive home (parents have taken Rice’s side, seeing the behaviors as normal) and has been in a relationship with an abuser since she was a young teen. She has no one outside of this toxic circle. So no, it’s not easy for her to leave. It’s harder than anything I’ve ever done, that’s for sure.
I don’t think it’s about money, I think Janay, just want to love her man and live happily ever after. But when a man physicallly assaults you, this is when you have to leave.
I feel for her, I hope she get the support she deserve so she can get away from Ray Rice.
This totally unacceptable.
A lot of people in abusive relationships fall for this trap. The abuser gets apologetic, and says everything their partner wants to hear. It doesn’t help that, like you pointed out, women in particular are marketed this fairy tale message about love and living happily ever after. I doubt Janay wants to admit (even to herself) how damaging her relationship with Rice has become.
Agree! They’ve been together for a while and I bet he’s great to her 80% of the time. So she’s trying to rationalize his abuse, so that he’s more like the man he seems to be most of the time.
* Note: Even if he was great 99% of the time and abusive 1%, she should still leave. No one deserves to be abused, ever. Just to be clear!
unfortunately, even her own parents are supportive of ray rice and her staying in the relationship.
If post-altercation tenderness and kindness are the most loving moments of a relationship, it makes psychological sense that the women forgive the bevahiour, or at the very least excuse it.
I cannot image the roller coaster an abusive relationship is. I hope everyone in this situation is able to get the tools and strategies to develop healthy expectations of themselves and each other, and that awareness continues to grow.
Yes, very disturbing. She’s clearly upset and distressed but doesn’t have the clarity to see the situation objectively and realize it’s not Ray she should be seeking comfort from. Her willingness to go straight into his arms again seems to point to a pattern of abuse. So sad.
I couldn’t see the video for some reason, but I agree that the fact that she wasn’t really shocked at what happened speaks volumes about there being pattern. Sad.
I think janay sees herself as a “ride or die” kinda woman. she will stick with him no matter what, he’s her man. and i think because she hit him too, she sees herself as a mutual participant, not a victim. but it’s obvious they are in a highly dysfunctional relationship. I hope young girls watching this play out don’t think this is a normal relationship. and it’s sad that janay seems to think it is. i just hope one of them ends it before something worse happens.
…like him getting a new contract for starters, cause it’d mean all this tour of Pandering paid off
I wish people would stop labeling her as a gold digger, who’s in it for the money. Janay, a clear victim of domestic violence, has been brainwashed into staying “true” to her man. Many women never leave their husbands. My Aunt didn’t. She stayed with him until her untimely death. Anyone who believes that incident was a one time deal is fooling themselves.
Agree completely.
I agree with you completely. Like I saide above,she just loves her man regardless, but sometimes, when someone gives you blows, you have to leave for sake of your own life. I am just glad that they have any children yet, and I hope not.
I hope she gets the support she deserves from her family and friends.
Yes, they do already have a daughter together – a toddler. I do beleive, though, that money plays into this. How can it not be an incentive to stay when that lifestyle is dangled in front of you like a carrot? I understand many victims of DV stay regardless of their status in soceity, but many stay because they don’t want or don’t know how to be independent. Living large is something she’s used to, so it does play into her decisions. They certainly haven’t laid low and attemted for Ray to find an alternate career. No, she’s doing interviews fighting for a new contract for him and that is all about money. I’m sure he’s feeding crap on the side that if his football career is over, it’s somehow her fault, but neither of them even consider a different life.
I think money is a factor, but not in the sense of greed. Rather, I think there is an overloading sense of responsibility on her shoulders. She’s been told repeatedly that it’s her fault that he lost his contract. Its her fault when they can’t pay their bills. That sort of financial burden is terrifying for anyone, let alone a woman who is systematically physically and psychologically abused. I was in an abusive marriage for 5yrs (although I was thankfully never knocked unconscious in an elevator). I spent the last 2 of those years trying to figure out how to get out, mostly out of financial fear and afraid that i wouldn’t be able to maintain custody of my daughter (I was stuck on a midnight shift at work). Guilt and fear are tough to overcome, and abusers make it as difficult as possible to break away.
@lolalulu, I agree. There are not many resources available to women leaving a marriage, much less women leaving an abusive relationship who are already incredibly vulnerable. I think this is especially true in many areas in the U.S. where it seems that there is a segment of the population that are opposed to providing funding, programs and supports for those in need (not those in want, but really in need), so there are few resources. If she has grown up with domestic violence, she probably has no idea that what she experiences is deviant from the norm.
+100000000000. And I’m so sorry about your aunt.
Oh COME ON, how irresponsible can the media be? This is literally textbook abuser behavior. Assault followed by enforced comfort, creating psychological dependence on the abuser. The fact that so many people are probably unaware of how abuse dynamics work just infuriates me beyond reason that they release this shit without explaining how and why it works.
As unacceptable as everyone says their behavior is (and I’m not arguing that it’s unacceptable), I think you really have to be in a similar situation to understand. So many people are making judgement against these two and you are not in their relationship.
I wish people would stop trying to infer anything about Janay and her motives from these videos. It is just victim bashing. Sure it looks like she may have lied to protect him and she is the picture of what happens when the abusers makes up right away with the abused. Still since I have never been knocked out cold by a man who you have been with for a long time and had a child with, I am not sure how I would react either, whether it was the first time or the thousandth time he hit me. I think with such a serious issue to come to some of the conclusions even this article does is just counter productive and leads to nasty comments not just about the abuser but about the abused, since she has decided to stay, and that is just wrong.
The comments she is a gold digger really upset me. Just because she stayed and married him, most women even in abused situations stay and it is not just for the money. She was with him when he was young, and now who knows what kind of career he will have or money for that matter? She has decided to stay and marry him, and I hope for her sake and her child’s she is one of the few where it works out for her.
Cycle of violence on full display. Wow
Yes. It’s textbook. And unbelievable to witness in real life. And in video. Damn.
Man leave her alone. I have a crazy ass relationship too and guess what? I’m not leaving my old man for anything. Some relationships are more volatile than others. Should people be hitting each other? No. Have I hit my dude before? Yes. Would I again? Nope – these were mistakes.
People make mistakes and then they’re branded abusers for life, give me a break.
Every couple that gets into a tussle doesn’t end up like Nicole and OJ – give it a rest.
This video makes me understand their situation better. They need some couples therapy and that’s it really. People are such hypocrites when it comes to assessing the quality of someone else’s relationship. Let them live
You get the love you think you deserve.
That sh*t made me want to vomit. Janay is a victim of domestic violence. Ray is a woman beater. They have the classic patterns of behavior. Someone up thread said they thought she was a ride ir die” kind of woman. I guess so. I hope with all my heart she turns into a “bye, bitch, I’m outta here and taking the kids, go f*ck yourself” kind of woman. Good luck, Janay.
Why is the victim handcuffed??!! What am I missing here? She just regained consciousness after being knocked out. This is horrible. She should have been sent to the hospital to check out her head trauma.
Making up after an assault is typical abuser behavior- makes you stick around for more punishment thinking that the man actually is sorry
THIS. Why wasn’t an ambulance called?!? One of the security guards saw her unconscious on the floor! Her arrest is appalling. Way to further victimize the victim.
I was wondering the same thing. Why was she not given medical treatment? If they wanted to arrest her, that could have been done AFTER a doctor checked her out. I mean damn, she was out cold on the ground ! I think they arrested her because she was seen hitting him as well (she hit him first I think, not that this gives him any right to knock her out though).
So is this part of the police playbook? You take a couple that’s just had violent fight and you put them next to each other in the elevator? A small constrained space with no exit? They had the smarts to show restraint, but what if it was a couple with poor impulse control? You could have had one or both partners severely injured right under police supervision – very bad. Any cops out there? Is this a breach of protocol?
I believe her when she said it was one of the worst days of her life. She wanted to spend valentines day as a couple, but she ends up with a group of friends and they dont talk to each other the entire trip. Then he spends most of his time with his friends or on his phone and the minute she tries to get his attention he spits on her, punches her, she gets knocked out, wakes up, they are both handcuffed, he’s out of work, the entire world sees a dark side of your relationship, you are forced to take responsibility for being a victim and now you have to sit back and wait for monetary redemption, plus raise a child. That’s a Huge load to carry every.single.day.
She’s in an abusive relationship and I don’t think it is ALL about the money but maybe that has a part to it, not in a she’s a goldigger way, but maybe she feels like she needs him and is dependent on him in order to live comfortably. It might be a factor but it isn’t why she is with him.
oh man this is just so sad… I can’t imagine living like this. My husband would never ever ever ever ever ever lay a hand on me. And if he didn’t, I certainly wouldn’t be nuzzling him after. It breaks my heart the stuff women put up with in this world … And then some people say we don’t need feminism 🙁
As a feminist, and a woman who grew up in an abusive home with an abusive father (who seriously mentally, and physically abused my mother and me), this is definitely signs of serious domestic violence and has most definitely happened more than once. That being said, yes Janay is a victim, but this isn’t some case of Ray Rice big bad monster who gets 100% of the blame, Janay poor victim 0%. As a child of a bad situation my mother gets some of the blame for staying. She was a consenting adult. Now do I hold her 50% responsible, no. Do I know my dad systematically took from her, isolated her, and did what abusers do, yes. But my mother did not protect me. Janay is not protecting her toddler daughter either from abuse or from growing up in a home where a woman is inferior. I feel for Janay and know she is a victim, but she is also an adult. Ignorance is not a good enough excuse. It took me telling my mom I would run away if my father ever hit me again to get my mom to leave. It took my dad holding his foot above my 9 month old sister sitting in her car seat, saying he could crush her whenever he wanted, for me to snap. I thank God my mom left. I also have told her she takes part of the responsibility in my shitty childhood. I don’t have the same feelings toward her as I do my father, but my mother let me down as well. She didn’t do it on purpose. She didn’t so it willingly or as some antagonist, but none the less, she let me down. As a mother myself of two young girls, and a son on the way, it is my responsibility as their mother to protect them. Just as it is my husband’s. just my two cents. Not victim bashing, but hoping that Janay gets to talk to someone who makes her see the big picture a lot better than she sees it now.
Good for you Mikeyangel for breaking a cycle. I imagine it was not easy.
I wish Janay would get a vision of herself as a powerful woman and protective mother. Like a lioness with her cubs. That she would mother herself in that way and extend that care to her daughter. What a painful experience this must surely be, but also an opportunity for a new life. I hope doors and windows and new avenues and new ideas open to this woman.
This makes me so sad. Domestic violence breaks my heart.
How could they have let them enter the same elevator and touch each other???? How hard would it have been to make them take separate elevators…