Every so often, John Mayer does something so funny that I forget all of his douchery from years past. This happened yesterday when he posted this photo to Instagram with the following caption: “So good to see my friend Ricky again. It’s been a while.” The Ricky in question is Ricky Van Veen, who is engaged to Allison Williams. Not that you could ever tell whether Ricky is a real person by the degree of photoshopping at work in John’s photo. Poor Ricky looks like a Sims character.
John fares slightly better in this image but not by much. His skin is completely airbrushed, but he left his lips natural. John’s mouth is more realistic looking than Ricky’s Ross Gellar smile. The weird stroke of reality sends the whole image into the uncanny valley. I honestly don’t know what John was thinking by uploading this selfie. He can’t be serious, right? John is a douchebag, but he’s a very self-aware douchebag. This must be a joke, and John is still giggling at his desk because we’re making a big deal over his creepy picture. He’s probably attempting a profound meta-commentary on the ephemeral nature of celebrity. Nice work.
The rest of John’s Instagram account isn’t nearly as weird as the Ballad of Ricky John. He posted a recent beach selfie, and da ladies still go crazy for him. One of the comments read, “You are amazing. You’re an a**hole with women but why you have to be so perfect?” Oh guurrrl.
Photos courtesy of John Mayer on Instagram & WENN
Aaaaaaaaaaahahahahahhahhahahahhhahhahahahahhahahaa!…..
(takes deep breath)
…..haaaaaahahhahhhhahahahahaaaaaaa!….
Oh man. What a tool. That’s all I’ve got to say.
@Joanne_S….Tool sums it up quite nicely.
Ewww, he is so gross, arrogant, and now apparently, vain as well. Tool is a very good description of him.
Except tools are useful…
Not in this case. I have never seen a more self-satisfied douche in my life, except maybe for Charlie Sheen.
And, ugh.
It looks like an episode of Doctor Who, when the mean and nasty aliens have invaded, pinched Earth for themselves, and sent all the humans to live in a soulless virtual reality. GET THE TARDIS!
They look like the aliens from the first Chris Eccleston episode!! The living plastic things, what were they called . . .?
THE AUTONS!
Yes! And women find that attractive? Why on Earth??
He’s terrible, and a douche, but I have noticed before that he can be very funny AND he’s made some decent songs (Clarity, Paper Doll). Remember how he cast this very showy, very thin, old ‘girl-woman’ in the clip for Paper Doll, basically a an old, caricatural version of Taylor Swift… I thought that was supremely funny…
Nah, that was the Prancercize lady. She’s well-known. I doubt him using her had anything to do with Taylor Swift.
lol, I forgot about the prancercize lady.
Back when the song came out, I read this article on the Vanity Fair website (“‘Five Reasons to Think Taylor Sift is John Mayer’s ‘Paper Doll'”)
http://www.vanityfair.com/online/oscars/2013/06/taylor-swift-paper-doll-photos
I think Swift might have been the inspiration for the song after all…
More proof of his sense of humor, the time he dressed up as Captain Stubing (from the 1970s ‘Love Boat’ series) when he performed on a cruise boat: http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-1165446/What-Jennifer-say-John-Mayer-dons-hotpants-sailor-outfit-cruise-ship-show.html
Hmmm… I am spending far too much time proving that John Mayer has a sense of humor, wonder what’s come over me…
He was likeable on the Chappelle Show, but only because the goodwill transferred from Dave.
Ahahahahaha! You are hilarious Bedhead!
Happy New Year! Thanks for the laughs x
I was going to say that the parody would only work with an ass pic, but then I realized…oh, check.
He looks different..thin and old. I like his music though, talented guy but with a big mouth.
Happy New Year to everybody!
Why is the picture a joke? Isn’t it just terrible PhotoShopping? Are we overthinking this?
No way, haha. It’s a joke. He may be a douche with women, but the man isn’t stupid.
Agreed. He was probably messing around with a program, saw this, laughed, and then posted it.
He’s a joker and a prankster. This is meant to be funny, and it is. Bravo, John.
This is not photoshop. Its probably one of those crazy beautifying apps that you can use. They are lots of fun and this clearly was in fun lol
Well, i woulnd want to have him as a boyfriend but as an affaire, of course. he is hot. who cares if hes a d-bag if you can have some fun with him. As a woman, we should also have some fun and be d-bag ourselfs some times and not always seek for THE ONE 😀
i had an amazing affaire with an d-bag, the se.x was amazing, i didnt care for him for a minute. that was years ago, i do not regret it, it was an amazing time. i was never interested in him as a person for love. he is still a d-bag as i hear but who cares? he is still hot and if you dont take these people serious you can have amazing fun with them. the people around him know hes a d-bag so who cares.
Well i have no words i hope its a joke. No one can seriously use the “blur” tool like that and not be trying to be funny.
And i am a john mayer apologist because he makes amazing music and him playing the guitar is one of the best things. IMHO he is really REALLY great at making music. His personality doesnt bother me much hes a douche just like the next guy until he finds a woman that will keep him on his toes. Just like most guys like him.
And one of my favorite songs by him is Edge of Desire!!!
Agree! I also love his music, he is so freakin’ talented. My favorite is his live performance of “in your atmosphere”. Wow.
And, Mozart was a bit of a douche as well — so I can forgive J Mayer a bit of douchery.
Bwahahahahahhahahahahhaah This Sh!t Looks like a romantic Oil Painting of Sims done on Velvet, then Shot through Barbara Walter’s greased Camera Lens
LOL. It’s just so ridiculous, even my cat could do better than that.
Did anyone ever watch the short-lived John Mayer show? Say what you may think about him as a person, but he is hilarious. Unfortunately for John, sarcasm doesn’t translate so well to print.
I have never understood the appeal of John Mayer. First, 90% of the time, when his mouth opens, douchery just tumbles out. Then his music is blah: no real profound message, the actual music/tunes are all bland. Every time one of his songs comes on the radio I’m just *dying* for it to end. And finally he is not (I’m sorry) especially good looking either! He’s not ugly, but he’s nothing OMGAMAZING either. I don’t run with models or really any particularly “beautiful” or high-powered people, and I would still say in my circle of friends/acquaintances there are numerous dudes who are as attractive as Mayer.
Bottom line: I don’t understand how this guy is such an apparent ladykiller. He must have some crazy in person pheromones because nothing about his public persona is attractive.
I’m with ya. He must have a big d*ck
I used to really like his musician know, I know, I was angsty. But I never found him attractive. I guess I’m the opposite of most. 🙂
the only thing I can think of is that this is some meta commentary on the ridiculousness of PS and its total abuse and misuse. Or else that bitch is so crazy he thought this looked good.
The Captain Stubing outfit was hilarious. Check out the Daily Mail photos for a good laugh. The photo at the top is quite amusing too.
People are complex, and most human beings are a mixture of good and bad qualities that get expressed more or less in different situations. In other words, John Mayer can make me laugh out loud at his jokes, and I will appreciate and enjoy his jokes…but he is still a douche.
I dunno why but I think of him as James Franco more creepy cousin or something. Both are so sketchy on social media and just so weird. I’m surprised they haven’t collaborated on something yet.
This pic CAN’T be serious. He looks as if he’s channeling Rob Pattinson in Twilight. Even the hair looks right ! I don’t know who the Ricky guy is supposed to be. Just a generic vampire, I guess.
I’m sure it’s supposed to be a joke, but it’s one I don’t get. Photo manipulation… is a thing? So he did it? Haha? I have never understood anything about this guy, though. I don’t find him funny, talented, attractive, or even douchey enough to get angry about. He’s said some things that SHOULD send me into a rage, but I can only yawn.
The only interesting thing about him is his dating life, and that is only interesting in a head-scratching way. Why do all these attractive, successful women go for him? Is it because he’s boring? They can project whatever they want onto him because he has no personality? He’s like Ethan Hawke’s character in Reality Bites, except not good-looking.