I was actually holding these Jennifer Aniston stories yesterday because I thought that Jennifer would definitely attend the People’s Choice Awards. I mean, that’s her awards show, right? She has at least a dozen People’s Choice Awards and she’s like the poster girl for that kind of awards show. But that was before the #Cake was washing over all of us and we were being caked into submission. This year, Aniston is too important for the People’s Choice Awards. This year, it’s Oscars or bust!
Speaking of her Oscar campaign, please read this amazingly bitchy Slate piece on Aniston and Cake. Slate isn’t saying that Aniston is wrong to work her campaign like a pro, they’re just saying that if this year wasn’t so “fallow” for Best Actress nominees, perhaps Aniston’s Cake would have been laughed out of the conversation long ago, because it’s not a very good movie. This line in particular is amazing: “It’s astonishing just how transparently Cake’s awards push has epitomized the grotesque caricature that awards season truly is.” Word.
Meanwhile, Aniston spoke this week about her bravery in doing the most difficult scene ever in Cake. The difficult scene was… putting her head under water. Really.
We all know Jennifer Aniston has a banging bikini body, but don’t be surprised if you don’t see many pics of her frolicking in the ocean or in a pool.
“I basically have a real fear of going underwater,” she said last night at a special screening of Cake, her much buzzed about indie in which she stars as a woman who suffers from chronic pain and a prescription painkiller addiction after surviving a horrific accident. Her fear made filming some scenes in the movie quite scary because her character’s treatment includes water therapy.
“I was a kid and I was riding this tricycle around a swimming pool and I drove my tricycle into the swimming pool and I didn’t let go and my brother tried to [help me],” Aniston explained. “So, I can’t go underwater and no one will believe me. I honestly can’t.”
The Friends star cracked that one pool shot in Cake took about 30 takes to get right. Not only is Aniston up for a Golden Globe on Sunday for her work in the movie, but we wouldn’t be surprised if her name is among the best actress nominees when the Oscar nominations are announced on Jan. 15.
She went without makeup for the movie and put on some weight for the role. Fake fake scars cover her face and body. It’s the kind of part she’d been “dying to do for years.”
Aniston said, “It’s like a catch-22. It’s you know, ‘Please let me play this part. I know I can do it.’ But then they won’t give you the part because they don’t know if you could do it. So, it’s hard,” she continued. “You have to just wait for that wonderful brave human being who sort of says, ‘This is interesting to me and all of us to take [the] risk and be bold.'”
Much brave. So Oscar. Very Cake. I get that some people have had traumatic experiences in the water and those scars can last a long time, but does anyone else think this is weird specifically for Aniston? I mean, she loves the beach. She loves tanning by the pool. She only vacations in places where there’s water. And all this time, she’s terrified of putting her head under the water.
Last thing: Fame/Flynet released some photos of Jen and Justin Theroux in Cabo from Monday and LOOK. The JORTS made an appearance!! This honestly made my week.
Photos courtesy of Fame/Flynet.
#JORTSFOREVAH!!
Lol at the Cake Doge Meme
Take a note, Christian Bale!
Jorts + commando = schwetty balls. Yuck.
Oh no, you had to go there. Where’s blue marie, she has something to say about this. Also, did dude laser ALL of his body hair off, or what?
Ask and you shall receive.. Oh great, you only summon me for buttermilk nuts.. Bisquick hammocks for everyone
YASSS!! I love it when my summoning powers work. Be glad I didn’t forcibly summon you to the horrible song I linked yesterday, that of course, I’m still singing. You should, however, google Carl Poppa (seriously, do it) because it’s my life goal to get everyone to Jiggy Jar Jar Do!
Ha ha ha, I hate you for that.. The guy in the next cubicle stood up and gave me the WTF stare, so I threw in a dance move to really throw him off..
Dur Dur Dur Dee Dur! Sweet baby Jesus, I’ve watched it at least 13 million times already.
Yes nasty, I see zero evidence of boxers or briefs peeking out as men seem wont to do these days.
totally nasty. he really is a never nude…he even has the jorts!
He should just pose for Blue Boy magazine and get it over with.
How did she get her hair wet here?
http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/09/25/article-1061771-0133993900000578-116_468x328.jpg
Come on, Abbot. Something about willful suspension of disbelief and stuff.
You’re right, mimf. Her hair is wet from the crystal teardrops that rained down from heaven because the Lord knew -he knew – Jennifer would one day deliver a performance so mighty it would forever change the way we look at, eat, and cherish the pastry food group.
#truestory Watch the clip in the Slate article and report back immediately.
Oh heavens! It was like watching La Traviata turn into Pegasus before my very eyes! Oscar? How about the Congressional Medal for the IMPOSSIBLE!
Nah, it just changes the way I look at my pharmacist. He’s never showed me how to smuggle illegal narcotics across international boundary lines.
They got it all wrong. You put the valium in the high blood pressure meds and reseal. Duh.
Really? You hold your head back in the water…. Face never gets wet!
She goes to the beach a lot, and hangs out by pools a lot, for someone afraid of water…
I don’t think she likes to swim. She just likes to show off her only asset.
See my post below with links to photos of Jen and John Mayer in a swimming pool looking very relaxed, happy, and ‘wet’ from head to toe. Either she’s lying now or those photos are from a staged Photo Op, because it looks like her head has definitely been under water in the photos.
Jenn is not afraid of the water per se, just of being submerged beneath the surface.
She’s obviously learned how to swim since she was a young child.
If she wins an Oscar for this role in this terrible movie, it will be the biggest joke in the history of the awards show. Look at the other actresses in their roles that are being considered, I mean this seriously is a joke.
If she wins, and sadly it is very possible she will now, then there is proof you can buy an Oscar as opposed to actually earning the trophy.
To point out an Oscar going to actress for a horrible movie.
Meryl Streep.
She won for that tragically awful “The Iron Lady”. When there were three other actress that year… who had done stellar performances. Streep won for that dog of a movie.
And I before anyone gets all touchy. There are other actress who deserve some attention. Than another Streep nomination.
Plus I want to see Aniston get a nomination… just to see how bad the tabloids will behave. You could not ask for better gossip fodder than Aniston getting that nomination. Then have either Pitt or Jolie get nominated for their pictures. (Selma and Unbroken)
My gawd it would be weeks of meltdowns here at Celebitchy if Aniston makes it.
I am not wearing make-up today. My hair froze this morning because it was still damp when I went outside into the subzero weather. I have a scar on my lip from a fall off my slide and one on my chin from an ice skating fall. Where is my Oscar?
Good lord, for that you deserve Oscar, a Golden Globe and a lifetime supply of Aveeno products for sure!
Can you sing? EGOT ( Emmy , Grammy. Oscar, Tony) or bust!
Was the water mixed with Tequila? Should have been easier to put her head under for a while, less traumatic. JT is yummy Cake.
I’m sorry. I just can’t separate the adult Jen with the child Jen. I just imagine her as a grown woman riding this little tricycle around a pool with Justin jumping out of the pool room trying to scare her into falling into the pool.
My mimosa business failed because I daydream about celebrity scenarios too much.
Lol Potataho. Potatohontas. Pocatater! (I could do this all day.) Seriously tho, you must know that no mimosa business will ever fail in my presence. Ever. #2drunk2fail
Not to stick up for JA because I could not care less about her, but I almost drowned as a child and I have a very real fear of the water and yet I go to the beach and I hang around my father in laws pool. It’s not so much the fear of looking at water or being near it. It’s more the fear of being over your head.
Good Lord, people with a fear of water still shower and stuff, you know.
yeah, I was going to say…
not her biggest fan, but I will defend her fear of water as it’s a real thing. I was a lifeguard and swim teacher for countless years and I’ve seen first hand the panic attacks that can result of just stepping INTO a pool as well as a small child that has a fear of putting their face in the water. I’ve taught adults that had NEVER stepped near a pool before and were afraid to even STAND in 3 feet of water.
so, while I have my doubts about the oscar-worthiness of her role, I understand her fear.
Same here, I am the youngest of 8 and was always quite a bit smaller than the older ones, that loved to pick on me at all times, but more so in the water, because I wasn’t as strong a swimmer as them, especially one of my sisters that used to regularly dunk me under water “for the fun of it”…
Now, I don’t go in any further than my knees if I am in water I cannot see the bottom of (rivers, lakes, ocean) Or into a pool unless I hang out on the sides of it, or in shallow end unless I am with my husband and I am 41.
So, I say YES! that fear is real.
wow, CJ…that’s too bad.
if you haven’t, consider taking a beginner adult swim class at a local facility (YMCA or a gym?…) as it will make you feel more comfortable and confident. even if you don’t actually go deep in or swim with your feet off the ground, it’ll help with your comfort level while in and near the water.
I had one woman who was deathly afraid of the pool and wouldn’t let go of the wall even in the shallow end and by the end of the course she was treading water in the deep end (8 feet). it’s certainly an individual thing but it might help…that way, even if you choose not to swim you won’t panic if you fall or get pushed in.
Yep, was going to say something similar – I didn’t have a near-drowning experience but I start to hyperventilate if I go out to far and the water is close to my face. I still go to the beach, though, (not my favorite place, but I go), I just “stay in my lane” when I’m there.
With that said, I hope she doesn’t even get nominated for this film. I really really hope. Ugh, I picture her being insufferable if she even gets nominated. Ugh!
Me too. It’s crazy, I know. I almost drowned twice as a kid, and now just the idea of having my head under water paralyzes me with panic. And yet I was raised in SoCal and have always been a beach girl. Oddly, I know, I’m far more scared of/panicked by pools than by the ocean. I can play in the small waves and have even used a boogie board in very shallow waves (somehow I have convinced myself that the waves will always bring me back–rip-tides, anyone?) , but I can’t leave the shallow end of a pool. Can’t. Frozen. I’m ashamed of my fear and most of my RL friends don’t know about it and would be shocked because of my beachy lifestyle.
Now I’ve at least told my CB buds: I’m a chickenhearted coward who can’t swim because she’s afraid to let go. Actually, I can’t even float. Have tried a couple of times and sank like a stone. Dunno why. Phobias are so weird, make no sense at all. 🙁
she looks super glamorous in that pic
Von Brow gives me a case of the skin-crawling schkeeves. He’s sucking in his stomach and examining it before heading out in front of cameras. I see little tiny dogs on leashes and moobs in his future.
Dude you know who has the most amazing moobs eva? Ben Affleck. I watched Gone Girl last night and must have pressed the rewind button about 17 hundred thousand times during the shower scene. We are talking Grade A Extra Large Cage Free Moobs. Not gonna lie, actually I better just stop writing now.
Hahahhaha
I have to watch that movie now, just for the moob action
Thanks for the vivid visual, mimif, I almost lost my lunch.
We’ve seen that picture of her before, haven’t we? Just this side of Married to the Mob with the hair and outfit. My 15 year old daughter rejected that top at Forever 21 as “too old lady” although that similar style and patterns are everywhere.
Ewww – look how low Justin’s shorts are???
Both Justin and Jennifer are exhibitionist narcissists – aren’t they?
As for this Oscar campaign – I am not going to waste any more time talking about it. Jennifer has proved that with bribing, buying Oscar bloggers, having a powerful media agent – you can buy the Oscars. She is and will never be in the same league as the other women currently fighting for a nomination.
If she gets nominated and even wins – the academy will lose credibility and respectability around the world. Infact I am willing to bet that many people will be astounished and laugh after hearing about her nomination.
And thank God for media to call out on Jennifer’s desperation and lack of talent. Now if they will only call out on her lying and home wrecking personality….
Yes the academy will likely spontaneously disband forever from the force of the sheer egregiousness, a travesty of worldwide proportions. I mean how dare anyone say a positive word about her?
For crying out loud, I’ll give this woman an Oscar, a Tony, a Pulitzer, a Super Bowl ring, a Congressional Medal Honor, the Nobel Peace Prize, not to mention a dry towel if she’ll just go away already!!!
Hear, hear!!!
Zzzzzzzzz
That is all.
I honestly have to ask, when did this movie come out, and where? cuz it has not played where i live (metro area of 1.5 million ppl) & i don’t know anyone who has seen it. has anyone who reads Celebitchy actually seen it, either?
From what I’ve heard/read, “Cake” came out in one theater in LA for a week…..for its limited release. We’ll see if it ever goes into wide release. But I don’t know anyone who’s seen it.
It was only out for a “qualifying” run – same as Still Alice, which will not be released until later this month. Cake will be released January 23 in a limited run. Also, the movie is not up for any awards – it is her performance in the movie that is – which is what I thought the awards were about. I have read numerous comments about how good her performance was and I find it hard to believe that she paid all the voters in SAG, GG and critics choice to nominate her.
@Virgilia Coriolanus …
I tried to respond to your query about “Cake’s” qualifying run last week, but for some reason my posts were being deleted.
“Cake” was released on December 31st for its 7-day qualifying run. When i Googled it the only place I could find the film showing was at the Rolling Hills AMC 20 in Rolling Hills.
Honestly, I hope she gets nominated and wins, only to read the comments here. It would be so much fun. The Oscars are a joke anyway, why not make it a big one.
Okay, let’s try this again. My other two posts disappeared.
“I get that some people have had traumatic experiences in the water and those scars can last a long time, but does anyone else think this is weird specifically for Aniston? I mean, she loves the beach. She loves tanning by the pool. She only vacations in places where there’s water. And all this time, she’s terrified of putting her head under the water.”
I don’t believe her for a minute because I remember seeing these ‘loved up’ photos of Jennifer Aniston and John Mayer in a swimming pool. They are both wet from head to toe so obviously her head ‘did’ go under the water at some point … unless the photos linked below were staged photo Ops:
http://www.celebitchy.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/foolingusheader.jpg
http://blog.emitations.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/07/john-mayer-and-jennifer-aniston-pool-kiss-3.jpg
Seriously? Oh, my…. Let me explain. When one is in the pool, you can throw your head back and wet your hair, NEVER putting your face underneath the water. You can ALSO splash “pool” water on your face. Hopefully, that clears all your questions about how to get wet in a pool, without going under water. Try it….
Oh my … the blind Delusion is strong with this one.
She looks amazing in that picture.
It is comical that people are slamming a person, and her performance, on a movie they have not yet seen…. There was a fabulous article in the NYT yesterday about CAKE.
Don’t know why my post was deleted, but basically: If she gets a nomination, good for her, although I highly doubt she would win.
Love her hair in that pic!
I can’t slam her for having a phobia. Lots of people have weird fears. While we see pool pics of her all the time, I’m not sure I’ve ever seen a pic of her in the water. A lot of people who can’t swim or are afraid will go to the beach or pool and just not get in water over their head. Don’t find it all that odd.
The woman was ‘in the deep end (for her) of the pool with John Mayer when they were dating. It was covered here at “Celebitchy.” Jen was wet from head to toe so her head must have gone under water at some point.
http://www.celebitchy.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/05/foolingusheader.jpg
OK, had not seen that when I posted. Not sure it really proves anything other than she got her hair wet in the pool. I won’t slam anyone on a fear of something. There are a lot of things to slam her about, but not this.
So now she needs to win because she bravely got her head under water??? In addition to bravely going “ugly”?? I tell you, she is stretching this thinner and thinner every day. It’s not so much that I don’t like her – she was fine in Friends and as long as she keeps playing herself/Rachel, she is fine… but this whole story of selling herself as a “serious” dramatic artist, please… enough.
I am not shading her fear – I happen to share it. But I would never assume I deserve an award, a promotion, or some other distinction if I choose of my own free will to do it.
On one hand I empathize with her desire to move from the rom coms that have been her staple – she may look great and dress twenty years too young all day long but the reality is that at some point the romantic lead roles will dry up for her, like any other starlet who has coasted on looks and tabloids. What irks me is that she is attempting to reinvent herself not by doing the heavy duty work – acting in smaller parts to prove herself, doing theatre, improving her skills… but by shameless self promotion, and the same tired hair/makeup/Cabo /tabloids stuff she has always done.
Here’s the scenario: even if she wins an Oscar this year by sheer will – how would that positively impact her career? This type of movie – which by the way, no one can see, no one wanted to distribute it, and was released in one theatre in one city… this is not what her fans like usually. As for people who want serious drama – by all accounts this is a crummy movie whom none of her co-stars are even remotely promoting. No one in HW is going to take her any more seriously after this. You’d think someone in her circle/business would have been able to better advise her.
His jean shorts make me think he’s a never-nude.
Marley & Me.
Seduction scene with Owen Wilson. Jennifer Aniston strips off & dives into the pool.
I wonder how many takes that took her? No mention of any phobias with that film release. Curious.