Kobe Bryant covers the March issue of GQ. I wouldn’t ordinarily care, but Kobe comes in and out of celebrity gossip like the wind. I have the feeling that he’s a big-time cheater, and I also have a feeling that his wife Vanessa just stays with him because she likes the “good life.” Which isn’t to say that Vanessa isn’t above yanking his chain and filing for divorce every now and then. But the real reason I’m writing this up is because Kobe gives some quotes about his 2003 sexual assault charge. Remember that? You can see the Wiki for the case here. The charges were dropped, although the young woman did sue in civil court and he publicly apologized to her without having to admit any wrongdoing. That incident still creeps me out and it’s tainted any good feelings I might have about Kobe’s athletic abilities. Anyway, you can read the full GQ piece here. Some highlights:
Kobe on his ego & whether that deters good players from joining the Lakers: “Does my nature make me less enjoyable to play with? Of course. Of course it does. Is it possible that some top players in the league are intimidated by that? Yes. But do I want to play with those players? Does the Laker organization want those specific players? No. Magic. Jordan. Bird. We all would have been phenomenal teammates. This organization wants players who will carry this franchise to another five or six championships. The player who does that has to be cut from the same cloth. And if they’re not cut from that cloth, they don’t belong here.”
He’s not selfish: “I chose to extend my deal with the Lakers to play with Shaquille O’ Neal and win championships. I knew what I could have done individually. I could have gone anywhere and destroyed people. I gave that up to win championships.” B
On Shaquille O’Neal: “He had years where he was lazy. But during those three championships we won? To say he was a beast would be an understatement. To say I didn’t learn things from him that I still use to this day would be a disservice.”
His religion helped him through his 2003 sexual assault case: “I started to consider the mortality of what I was doing. The one thing that really helped me during that process—I’m Catholic, I grew up Catholic, my kids are Catholic—was talking to a priest. It was actually kind of funny: He looks at me and says, ‘Did you do it?’ And I say, ‘Of course not.’ Then he asks, ‘Do you have a good lawyer?’ And I’m like, ‘Uh, yeah, he’s phenomenal.’ So then he just said, ‘Let it go. Move on. God’s not going to give you anything you can’t handle, and it’s in his hands now. This is something you can’t control. So let it go.’ And that was the turning point.”
Does he have friends? “I have ‘like minds.’ You know, I’ve been fortunate to play in Los Angeles, where there are a lot of people like me. Actors. Musicians. Businessmen. Obsessives. People who feel like God put them on earth to do whatever it is that they do. Now, do we have time to build great relationships? Do we have time to build great friendships? No. Do we have time to socialize and to hangout aimlessly? No. Do we want to do that? No. We want to work.”
He seems… tightly wound. That’s what people always say about Kobe. That he’s basketball and nothing else, that he never really developed as a person beyond the game. As for Kobe’s priest asking him point-blank if he assaulted a woman and asking after his legal team… well, all that made me think of was the fact that a lot of priests have been needing legal representation in the past few decades. And of course Kobe’s big life lesson out of that moment was “let it go.” Ugh. Professional athletes.
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Photos courtesy of Peggy Sirota/GQ.
I somehow remember his attorney in the assault case being FEMALE yet he’s talking about a male attorney here. Goes to show his opinion of women when the one who kept him out of prison isn’t even acknowledged.
Sadly, there are many times when men hire female attorneys to be the “face” of the legal team, but the real work is being done by the men. My guess is that this is what Kobe did. Drives me nuts that women sign on for these kinds of jobs, but perhaps they don’t know the gig at the outset. Regarding Kobe’s emotional growth – remember he went straight from high school to the NBA. The time when most of us are growing up, he was already thrust into adulthood. I’m not a Kobe fan at all, but I do think that emotional maturity is lacking because of how his career progressed. Or, maybe he’s just a douche. LOL!
The woman was the one who handled all direct and cross-examination during the trial. That’s heavy lifting. And he deliberately hired her for the appearance but she did the work and he should be giving her credit.
+1, Lilacflowers. I cannot STAND this guy and all the hero-worship that surrounds him.
It’s lawyer 101 that if you’re going to blame the victim, in a rape case, you need a women attorney. It just looks bad to have a male attorney screaming at a girl who’s been raped , that she was asking for it!
Back door Bryant got away with rape because his fans hounded the poor girl out of town. No one gives his wife a $1 million ring if he’s innocent.
well he wasn’t innocent. he cheated on her and publicly humiliated her.
But funny enough, Vanessa Bryant has a lot of property in solely her name, if she wanted to eventually walk away she would be very well compensated.
That I’m sure he paid for and she wanted in her name to keep him in line and keep her future secure. Smart move by her.. or her lawyers
Yes I am saying he did pay for it, and what she was rumoured to get in case of divorce was several properties and whatever else. I think he did this after the case ,maybe she was going to divorce him and he had to give her some reassurance.
I am not saying he did it, not saying he didn’t. BUT it really bothers me when people say “he’s KOBE! He doesn’t have to rape anyone!” Let me tell you- I have hung out with pro athletes/ famous people and they never hear no and think they deserve what they want when they want it. I have a friend who was given date rape drugs by a group of professional hockey players. I’ve been treated aggressively by a professional athletes. Frankly, in my experience they are worse than normal men.
not saying he did it. But if you think just because he’s Kobe so there’s no way.. Think again.
Yep. I was practically raped by a “good looking” rapper and yet, people think he’s this great guy. No. He’s an entitled predator who preys on people and gets away with it.
I think he did it. Would you publicly apologize for raping someone if you didn’t do it?
Totally. Combining the sense of entitlement with the professional strength, adrenaline, and testosterone doesn’t produce choir boys most of the time.
I agree. Same goes for fraternities. I am so glad I was never part of that environment when I was in college, for just this reason.
Athletes are worse than normal men because they have more confidence, their ego is through the roof. The only way a confident man will also be a nice person is to have a great education (formal or non-formal) and a healthy amount of self-control, but in LA I doubt this package is possible.
I offer no excuses for athletes’ or celebrities’ shitty and abusive behaviors toward their fans but people need to understand the difference between the professional and the person behind it. If there is a nice person attached to the professional, then approach, if not, stay away and be satisfied with their work.
I agree with you–to a point–but it borders on victim blaming to say a person has to differentiate the two. Who hasn’t wanted to meet their favorite celebrity? How many would turn down an opportunity for an outing or one on one with them?
These men are predators first and athletes second. The rapper I met seemed like a really nice person–despite his upbringing–and he made me feel really special as I interviewed him, offering to get me food, seeming interested in my career and life.
Then like a switch, it turned off and he became this monster. I can’t blame myself.
I would actually say that it’s pro athletes with tons of money. In Europe it’s soccer players. Same thing. But the ones who are on an Olympic level but don’t make obscene amounts of money because their sport just doesn’t pay that well? They seem much more well-adjusted and sane. It’s always the highly paid ones who end up surrounded by scandal etc.
littlemissnaughty- I would tend to agree. The $$ and celebrity that really messes with people.
You hit the nail on the head, but I want to take it a step further and add that people/fans have a hard time separating any celebrity’s talent from the person behind it – be it musicians, actors/actresses, sport figures, political, etc. There seems to be an misunderstanding or naivete that a person’s talents define them as a whole. They do not.
Darren Sharper is an example of exactly that. As gorgeous as that man is, he’s drugging and raping women.
I’ve had a bad experience with a college athletic star who wasn’t use to hearing no either. He just couldn’t believe I was turning him down and was telling me he had worked really hard on his body and hadn’t got laid for a while so I really couldn’t turn him down for sex. He even knew I had a boyfriend but when I reminded him of it he was like so what.
@TX so agree with your comments. Spot on. In my younger days, I saw some/heard alot of similar stories. I am not saying all athletes are like this-but there is quite alot of this going on. “Sense of entitlement” doesn’t begin to cover it.
Actually, he admitted he did it.
So, he has no time for relationships and friendships but somehow some woman out there married him…a guy that openly admits that all he wants is to work (points for honesty)!
I don’t care if he is a cheater, I am starting to believe that women have lost their minds. The only women that stay in a bad marriage for the “goods” are those that don’t trust themselves to get the “goods” through their own work or that simply don’t want to put in the work – either way, it sucks to be an opportunist and it’s great to be good at what you do.
Vanessa was still a teen-ager when she married him. The woman has had so much work done on her body that she resembles an inflatable. She accepts large pieces of jewelry to look the other way when he cheats. She has absolutely no self-esteem and it is sad.
Being a teenager was an excuse years ago, but at this point, she’s an adult making adult decisions – not good ones, but they are her own. I’m sure she loves him, but still – No doubt she likes the lifestyle afforded a professional athlete’s spouse.
I wonder what he’ll be like once he’s “too old” to play ball. Phenomenal athlete but I wouldn’t want that kind of life, even for millions. He can learn something from Magic who has dedicated his life to charities.
He is getting too old to play ball. He should have left in a blaze of glory yet he will have a couple a bad seasons. Ego.
Ugh. I’m a Christian, but I hate that old saw that God won’t give you more than you can handle, like God sits up on a throne and doles out heartache on the basis of what each individual can take. What kind of jerk would do that? And why? And then how come so many people commit suicide? I don’t think God is a puppeteer. He’s there to comfort you and give you strength when life gets ugly. Because it does, at one time or another. And you can take it because you don’t have any choice, except to end your life.
I want that priest to travel to a trash dump in Bangladesh and tell the children living there that it’s probably only because God knows they can handle it. Curious how God thinks people in certain parts of the world can handle so much more than people in Western countries.
^this!
Exactly. That sentiment always drives me crazy and I tend to go on a rant about it whenever someone says it in front of me.
Well said, I have always disliked that phrase ( God doesn’t give you more than you can handle), too.
That’s beautiful, GNAT. Really eloquently stated.
@GNAT, right there with you. I hate when people say that to me because of my special needs daughter. I handle it because I have to, it’s my life and my daughter and there is nothing else I can do but handle it because I love her. Usually these people also say something along the lines of “I don’t know how you do it.” or “I don’t think I could do it.” It’s like, I have no choice, this is my child, wouldn’t you do the same for yours? Sorry this was totally off topic but I had to comment.
I hate that phrase so much. Like what exactly is the alternative to handling the situation? Dissolving into a puff of smoke?
Yeah..I followed the case back in the day.
1) The girl claimed that she was disheveled and distraught when she left his room. Her own boss wrote a letter to the judge refuting that. The boss in her letter stated that the girl had no bruises.and was not disheveled and finished her shift and cashed out her drawer as always.
2) in the accusers rape kit exam, They found evidence of dna from 2 different men after she was allegedly sexually assaulted by Kobe.
Now I’m not saying it’s impossible for a rape victim to have sex after rape, but ….
3) it got to the point that the state crime lab, the prosecutors go to for evidence, testified for he defense!
4) once it became clear that the case was a shambles, the accuser refused to testify, not wanting to expose herself to media scrutiny (or be doubted as a liar). After that, DA had to drop the charges.
The civil suit was about keeping the details of their one night stand from getting out.
to your second point: it is possible for her to have sex before the assault, tho.
That is true. ..except that the crime lab ruled the dna deposits were after kobe.
I know Kobe is a big time athlete but I don’t think he has that much pull.
I always believe the victim first. From your initial statement to anyone (including bosses, coworkers, friends, etc.) you’re dragged through a horrible circus of finger-wagging. It leads to guilt, shame, and self-doubt.
1) So a famous, privileged athlete is accused of sexually assaulting a woman. If you’re a manager, you kind of want celebrity clientele to stay at your hotel. There’s plenty of motive to refute the woman’s claims.
2) Yeah, it’s not uncommon for a victim to have sex with someone else as a method of making sex seem like a healthy, wanted act, under their control, and on their own terms. Another reason is to “wash” away the previous assault.
3) Again, power pulls strings. Also I’m not entirely clear on what you mean by this declaration.
4) Do you know what they do to you on the stand if you’re stating that someone raped you? The prosecutions eviscerates you. It’s awful. Sooo many people decline to testify for this reason.
Please I think you should stop watching CSI , no crime lab would be able to tell in a 24 period which is when she was tested with rape kit and the if they found different trace specimens of DNA in what order it was place in her vagina with the 24 hours.
And because that statement is made up and I don’t remember the facts of case, all the rest of what you posted I’ll take with a grain of salt, FACT is he paid her a settlement and publicly apologized to her.
I’m with Annie. Sorry, but if memory serves me correctly, he never denied they had sex. He claimed it was consensual. She claimed it was not and that he sodomized her. I have wondered if perhaps she was up for sex, not back there, said so, but he took it the way he wanted it anyway….which would be rape.
Any person who pays off an accuser is suspect in my book. He had the means to fight back legally – far more than the accuser, and yet he chose to publicly apologize, pay her off, and give his stupid wife a giant ring on T.V. That smells horribly of guilt.
Bruises usually do not show up immediately. When I bruise, it takes a good two days to reach full, colorful glory.
Do I find it super-annoying when people speak in questions and answers? Yes. Do I think Kobe does it because he can’t actually express himself? Yes. Do I think he’s an ego-monster and probably a rapist? YES.
Answering questions with questions is intellectually lazy. It’s also a stall tactic – gives the person more time to come up with a valid answer w/out the obvious awkward silence.
Got away with rape like Juice got away with double murders, just need to have truck load of money and fame it seems!
Because if there’s anything that Catholic priests are known for it’s handling sexual assaults well.