Vanessa Hudgens is pretty innocuous. The worst thing that’s ever happened to her was that unfortunate incident in which weird, oddly-posed naked photos of her came to public light. After that, she’s pretty much been striving for Disney homogeny. But Vanessa, like her boyfriend Zac Efron, is trying to break free from the wholesome Disney image. She’s doing it with a surprisingly funny interview in Self.

First, Vanessa claims to be “in love” with Angelina Jolie. Vanessa says, “Everything she does, I adore.” That’s sweet. Much like Reese Witherspoon and Miley Cyrus, Vanessa is using Angelina’s name as an all-access pass to de-saccharine her image and let Hollywood producers know that she’s available for more hardcore roles. Or Vanessa could just be a Brangelunatic, whatever makes sense.

The funny part of the interview comes when Vanessa starts talking about her legs and feet. I don’t want to destroy the beauty of Vanessa’s imagery, so I’ll let her words speak for themselves:

Brad Pitt better watch out – a hot celebrity has a thing for his baby mama!

“I’m in love with Angelina Jolie,” Vanessa Hudgens tells the May issue of Self. “Everything she does, I adore.”

Celeb crushes aside, Vanessa is moving on from her dancing and singing days in High School Musical, and is looking forward to her next movie challenges.

“I’d like to do an action film where I could kick someone’s ass,” she reveals. ” I want to be strong and empowered. I want to shock everybody.”

She even has a secret weapon to help her take on the role of a butt-kickin’ tough girl – her “really strong legs”!

“I inherited them from my dad, who has tree stumps for legs, basically. I’ve got big calves that look good. When I wear heels, it looks like I’ve worked out my legs a lot, which is why I love them,” she says, adding, “I also have a big, big big toe. I call it my goat toe. I can climb anything.”

From OK! Magazine

Alright, “goat toe” is cracking me up. I’ve never heard anyone describe their feet/toes with goat imagery, but it totally works. Powerful, literary, hilarious… Vanessa’s memoir will be called My Left Goat Toe. The cherry on the goat toe sundae is the last sentence though: “I can climb anything.” I seriously cannot stop laughing… I just have this image of Vanessa and her goat toes, climbing whatever she sees. Vanessa, please do more interviews!

Vanessa Hudgens is shown at the premiere of 17 Again last night in LA. Credit: Juan Rico/Fame Pictures