I was just thinking to myself the other day, “It’s been a really long time since the Hogans did anything terrible for me to yell at them about.” Normally they only go a week or two, max. But aside from Nick being allowed to drive again (I hope you’re all wearing helmets, Floridians), the bleach-loving family has been pretty quiet lately.

Well, except for Hulk and Linda’s incredibly acrimonious divorce. Just in case you thought these two had toned it down a bit – or you bought into the idea that Linda’s the bigger douche – Hulk says that this whole legal process has made him empathize with O.J. Simpson. And he could have gone the same route.

HULK Hogan is sounding homicidal over the way his wife Linda dumped him, forced him out of his $18 million mansion, allegedly started spending his money at the rate of $40,000 a month and dating “some shaggy-haired pool boy 30 years her junior,” Rolling Stone reports. “I could have turned everything into a crime scene, like OJ, cutting everybody’s throat,” he told the magazine.

“You live half a mile from the 20,000-square-foot home you can’t go to anymore, you’re driving through downtown Clearwater and see a 19-year-old boy driving your Escalade, and you know that a 19-year-old boy is sleeping in your bed, with your wife . . . I totally understand OJ. I get it.”

He and Linda are battling it out in a Florida divorce court, where Linda’s attorney claims she’s entitled to use the car and that Hogan’s claims against her are merely an attempt to control her love life.

[From Page Six]

Hulk has gotten slightly better press than Linda, mostly because she’s dating aforementioned 19-year-old, who’s a friend of Nick’s. Obviously neither of her children are fans of the match either. And as creepy as she is, Linda doesn’t talk to the press as much as Hulk does, so we’ve heard more of his side.

Now it’s clear his side is absolutely insane. I’m sure Linda will be getting a nice little order of protection now. What a dangerous, stupid thing for Hulk to say. We’ve all known anger and rage, but to say you “could have turned everything into a crime scene, like OJ, cutting everybody’s throat,” is just beyond the pale. I doubt he had any public sympathy before, but Hulk just screwed himself out of whatever good will there was. He’s a big guy, too, and obviously strong. Acknowledging that he poses a massive threat to his soon-to-be ex-wife was incredibly foolish – and scary. Never do I want to hope for the best for the Hogans, but I hope Linda gets some security. And makes Hulk pay for it.

Header photo of Hulk and Linda at the 2005 Billboard Music Awards. Images thanks to Pacific Coast News.