As a child of bitterly divorced parents, I’ve always found it’s best to communicate all parenting issues through lawyers, subpoenas, and things delivered via a process server. I fully plan on working out all family issues with my future husband that way, even though I intend to remain married. It’s just normal to me to make sure everything’s in writing and signed by a judge. I consider this healthy.
Britney Spears has another way of going about it, and I can’t really argue that her way is any more irrational than mine. Brit relies on frozen pizza and awkward conversations to get her point across. Her point being, “Back off bitch.”
Britney Spears has reportedly confronted ex-husband Kevin Federline’s girlfriend Victoria Prince about her relationship with the star’s children.
The singer apparently invited the couple for a dinner party at her house in Calabasas, Los Angeles, and issued Prince with a warning about her involvement in the two boys’ lives.
“Britney is still not happy that Victoria has been spending so much time with her sons,” a source told Heat.
“She wanted to make sure that everyone understood that she was the boys’ mum and it was going to stay that way.”
Despite the warning, Spears is said to have been in a relaxed mood during the evening.
“It was Britney’s idea to have the meal. She gave the housekeeper the night off, so it wasn’t a fancy meal – just frozen pizzas and some leftovers,” the source added.
“She thought it would be helpful to meet Victoria and get to know her a little.
“The conversation was a bit rocky at times, and there were a few awkward silences. But afterwards Britney seemed more relaxed.”
[From Digital Spy]
I can’t say I’m surprised that Britney’s not happy about Victoria’s close relationship with her sons, since it’s been reported for quite a while. But it does sadden me. A good mother should be glad her children have a person in their lives that clearly loves and cares for them. And it also says something positive about K-Fed’s maturity that he’s picked a woman who has a deep fondness for his children.
That said, I’m sure it’s natural to be envious and feel like your position is being threatened as your sons’ mother. And because Britney doesn’t have custody of her boys, I’m sure it’s a sore spot with her. There’s what we “should” feel and what we do feel, and while she “should” be happy for a good person looking out for her kids, it makes perfect sense to feel like it threatens her own maternal role.
Here’s Victoria with Kevin and Britney’s sons this past winter. Images thanks to Fame Pictures .
Actually that sounds like a pretty sensible and mature way to communicate! Certainly less likely to inflame hostility (not to mention less expensive) than official & legal communications.
Someone rightly pointed out on another thread that Victoria seems far more loving in photos with the children than Britney every did/does.
She really looks like a loving and caring mother should be,unlike Britney who is always smoking in the presence of her kids.
That’s gotta be hard to see her kids bonding to another woman and seeing her care for them like she’s the mother. Especially when brits own actions got them taken away. That can’t feel good.
I don’t think it’s approiate for Kevin’s new girlfriend to be acting like a hands on mom. I understand Britney’s point of view. I don’t think its a “beautiful” thing that the new woman is so involved with the kids.
I understand blended families are common today. Heck, I’m part of a blended family! (I’ve had 3 stepmoms). But the stepmother isn’t THE mother. Her relationship with the kids are contingent on her relationship with the father of the kids. I think she’s playing ‘happy family’ in hopes of pleasing her man, but if he were to break up with her tomorrow she wouldn’t be able to see them.
My point is, TREAD CAREFULLY in establishing a relationship with your significant other’s kids. It’s bad form to act like you’re their mother when you’re not. You wouldn’t want someone to do that you.
I don’t understand why women thing it’s okay to disrespect other women. They’re dating the guy, and think it’s okay slight the ex. Well, the truth is if he’ll treat YOU the same way after you break up too.
Oh for crying outloud…..get off the damned soapbox about people smoking! There are OTHER things to worry about in life without worrying about OTHER people’s PERSONAL choices!
Sammy are you retarded???? Smoking isn’t a “personal” choice when you’re subjecting your kids and other people to harmful second hand smoke. Get informed before you make stupid responses you halfwit!
I think it’s great that the girlfriend has an affectionate relationship with the boys. In all honesty, young children really depend on the consistent warmth and nurturing that should come from a mother. If their natural mother can’t provide it, it’s great that they can get it from another mother figure, be it a grandparent, aunt or unfortunately significant other of the father.
Look at how the boys are cuddled into her arms. Kids need that, not once a month or even a week, but several times a day. It doesn’t usually come naturally when it’s a nanny type figure because they may be instructed to maintain a certain hands-off approach.
I understand that the kids may be heartbroken should the father break up with the girlfriend and that relationship is severed, but that doesn’t mean that it shouldn’t be allowed to flourish during their time together.
Ivy I think your opinion may be clouded because you have had too many stepmothers. I think the children benefit from the love and affection that she is giving them. That is most important.
She’s not a skank like their momma. Lol.
How do you NOT comfort a child? The girlfriend appears to only be doing the decent thing here. Mature mothers would recognize this. But yes, boundaries need to be respected.
You know, this right here shows what divorce is for kids: people flitting in and out of their lives stemming from one parent or both. Most of the time, one parent is stepping up to do the job of two. So what if Kevin has a little help from a girlfriend? Maybe Britney should stop the tour and try to snag all the time she can get with her boys.
Every child benefits from having as many loving, well-bonded caregivers in their lives as possible. Like it or not, Victoria is a significant part of these children’s lives and how wonderful for them and for their families that she loves them and cares for them deeply. I’m sure they get the same love and care from all their caregivers, including their father, mother, grandparents, Shar Jackson, their nannies and their bodyguards. The more love and care they get, the better!
i think Prince just want to show she likes the kids so much. Kids are brits and they are famous. Of course she has to show everyone she loves them. if she not carrying them with those sweet pose, others might tell her shes also rude to the children.
I agree with Britney because shes still there as a mom, Kevin is not a widow. only divorced. and the kids still got the mom. Prince should make a distance. shes putting much picture that shes taking over Brits place.
And one thing, if the Kids arent Spear’s should this woman also handle the kids the same shes doing now?
I saw some of this girl’s pictures without make-up, i should not judge the book by its cover but as much as i dont trust britney, the more i dont trust this woman as well… as you know shes not a family.
I would understand the Giselle Bunchen story because shes alrady married to her guy and treating the kid as her own. but not this spears situation.
Prince, leave Brits kid alone. flourish your relationship with Kfed first or get married with him before taking over the shoe of being step mom. youre just a gf.dont invest too much emotional attachments to the kids. the family has issues, dont be a crowd. Too many cook spoil the broth.
Well, it couldn’t hurt to have another parental figure offering love and hopefully decency given that Britney blurts about her poony hanging out while on stage. Also, reports discuss the difficulties caused by Brit’s mood disorder so if there are others there who are less challenged psychologically, then all the better for the boys. Britney obviously loves her children but will probably never be 100% stable and will always need extra support.
My question is “Is she as loving and affectionate to his other children?” I’ve never seen pictures of her and his other children. Is he ever even with them?
i feel like this Prince woman is also enjoying being pictured with Britney’s kids around. Who was she before anyway? Its like carrying trophy everywhere with the children of one of the most famous woman in the planet. And now she got paparazzi too because shes carrying britney’s children.
Its good to know that someone is also loving Brits kids but not to the extent that she has also to show everyone how very caring she is to the kids.that shes the new woman of the father. Like when there’s cameras around, shes there posing with her glasses like superstar also. Her acts of course would hurt Britney. RESPECT at least. its a family matter.
Britney is still healing herself and even we capsize the world, Britney is still the mother, the breadwinner, the one paying for the kids necessities and even paying all Kfeds expenses. This Prince woman got lot of freebies already.
Its good Britney initiate the talk and hopefully this woman knows her limits now. The children is very hot to the public eye. I hope she wont take that opportunity for her self advancement.
a dinner party with frozen pizza & leftovers? man, why didnt i think of that when i have people over?!
As long as K-Fed is sure she’s going to stay in their lives, I’d say more affection from a mentally healthy person would be great. But if she’s going to be one in a string of mothers, it could be damaging for the boys to get too attached to her and then lose her.
I am sure that it is very difficult for Britney to be barraged with pictures of her ex’s GF with her children, and I have real sympathy for her. If she’s jealous that is understandable, but her jealousy is her problem. The children’s care is the point, and Prince appears to be capably nurturing the child in several pictures.
Britney’s desire to impede Victoria’s relationship with the children (oh yeah, she’s calling that “boundaries”)is really her need to be perceived as something she is not: the primary female caregiver of those children. The cold, hard facts are that Kevin has custody, and Britney is a ward of the court. The woman in Kevin’s life will spend more time with the children than Britney. Britney will always be their mother, but that is only a call for her to step up and act like one, not a reason for Prince to back off.
I’m both a mom and a step mom. I don’t think it’s showing the birth mom “disrespect” to form a close bond with your step children. Quite the contrary. It’s honoring what a great job the birth parents have done raising that child, that the child can be so open to accepting love from another adult.
As for someone’s claim that Victoria is only doing this to ingratiate herself to Kevin- how do you know that? My ex and I split up years ago and I still see his sons whenever I get the chance. It’s not their fault that their dad and I couldn’t make it work. They are not my children but I love them and helped raise them for 8 years!
If everyone in the equation can put their egos aside and focus on what’s best for the kids, a parent/step parent relationship can work well.
methinks britney is still all about britney, and that’s what this is about too. not her kids’ needs.
and let’s not forget she’s under conservatorship, basically not able to handle her own affairs…I’m thinking her kids need all the extra care and mothering they can get. i still have my doubts as to whether she has any real ability to bond positively with her kids.
Why is this any different than the kids cuddling up to nannies? She needs to get over herself and her insecurities, grow up and be thankful that her ex found someone willing to be a step-parent to her kids.
Spoiled star not getting her own way, will stamp feet!
Let’s not forget that only a few years ago, Britney was being photographed holding and cuddling K-Fed’s other children. I wonder what her reaction would have been if Shar had told her “back off bitch.” Not so nice when the shoe is on the other foot, is it?
Codzilla:
April 29th, 2009 at 3:05 pm
Someone rightly pointed out on another thread that Victoria seems far more loving in photos with the children than Britney every did/does.
VERY first thing I noticed, too. Totally agree. That’s not to say I don’t think Britney doesn’t have a right to be upset/jealous, that’s natural. But as much as I 100% believe Britney loves her boys, I also 100% believe she is simply incapable of taking care of them (a profound, shocking statement, I know 😉 ) Anyway I totally agree, Codzilla.
Britney should appreciate the warmth and affection Victoria is giving those kids. At least Victoria’s not running her mouth like Mrs. Tom Brady.
Victoria looks far more maternal than Britney and that’s what’s really pissing Brit off.
Does anyone know about the background of this girlfriend? Why does she get an automatic pass? Didn’t some girls in her high school want to get a restraining order against her? I think I read something of the sort (I’ll look it up again). And high school wouldn’t be too far in her distant past, either. I’ll post back when I find out more.
Also, lets not forget that when Britney and Kfed got together, she was acting ‘motherly’ with his and Shar Jackson’s children.
Those little boys probably cry for her..
she has been consistent in their lives..
while mommy was trying to get it together and screwing paparazzi.
shows everyone should not have kids.
I bet they probably harmlessly ask where is she or something.
Brit is already insecure and crazy!
Brit made the choice to star in daddy’s little song-and-dance spectacle to resurrect her career.
It’s her business if she would prefer to jiggle around on stage instead of staying at home and raising her children. But don’t spoil a classy meal because the children voiced their preference, as well.
I think that when you get your divorces and your husbands new girlfriend hones in on your kids to make him think she will be a good mother to them then you have room to talk. Unless you have lived it and walked in Brits shoes who are you to talk? If you have not had some woman think using your kids to get your ex then you have no experience with it but with todays divorce rate I am sure there is a 50 50 chance that you will lol
Britney is trying to regain her footing after a rocky time. It is understandable that she feels vulnerable to being displaced. It is also understandable that she needs to claim her motherhood.
I dont think she did anything wrong here. And most mothers reading this will agree.
She didn’t go bat sh!t crazy. She didn’t demand Ms. Prince disappear off the face of the earth. She extended an olive branch, but held her ground on her rights and her role.
Well played, Ms. Spears.
I’m truly rooting for your comeback.
Oh .. but next time: Send OUT for pizza. Forget the frozen crap. Dominos delivers. Watch out for the un-identified green stuff though!
Not sure why my earlier post doesn’t appear, but I’ll try again. Prince was arrested in 2007 for assault and disturbing the peace; in high school, the parents of three teenagers filed for a restraining order against her and lastly, she was caught with a stun gun at school. I don’t think she’s very promising stepmother material. In fact, I’d want her far from my kids. Anyone can take a picture snuggling with a cute kid. It means nothing.
the boys are very lucky to have a girl like victoria she seems normal and not crazy like britney
Oh c’mon – didn’t we ALL carry stun guns at some point or anyother? Give the girl a break 😉
I’m kidding of course, (for those of you who don’t recognize sarcasm) but really, what does it matter? She doesn’t look like she intends to stun the boys and that’s a good thing.
Totally agree with MSat here… I’m both a mother and a stepmother and all of our family recognizes the other as family. Meaning, ‘our’ kids are just as close to us as ‘his’ kids are. And they love each other. It’s not disrespect to the other parent who is not in the equation, it’s called building a family.
And whomever referenced Giselle Bundchen… she dated that QB puke for several years and was photographed snuggling with another woman’s baby as soon as the child was born. There is no difference in the two situations.
Ran, I did cut the girl a break by not mentioning that she was nabbed for underage alcohol consumption, which is fairly routine for school-age high school kids. That’s not what troubles me: it’s the menacing behavior that extended beyond high school to just over a year ago. Now come on, can you imagine yourself at 25 being arrested for assault? It does seem like a pattern, given her high school record. I just question how upstanding she is. She’s also 6 feet tall, so she’d be a pretty scary assailant, too. As a high school teacher, I’d take the harassment of other girls and a stun gun in school very seriously. We’d call the police for the weapon and that’s what her school probably did, too. I don’t buy that she’s good for the kids based only on a few snapshots and the fact that she’s sleeping with their dad.
Back off Britney, she’s more of a mom than you’ll ever be. You had your chance.