Charlie Sheen is an abusive POS who is thought to have deliberately spread HIV to perhaps dozens of partners, for which he spent millions in hush money. He regularly gives creative death threats to anyone unfortunate enough to have to deal with him, including his own young daughter, but he still gets major TV interviews to promote his projects. On Friday Charlie was on The Graham Norton show ahead of his “Evening with Charlie Sheen” show with Piers Morgan in London, which was Sunday. He’s trying to convince people he’s changed. He shows up sober-ish and talks a good game and everyone wishes well for him. It’s maddening and yet here we are again. (Incidentally, the performance got a good review from The Telegraph and it’s being hailed as a comeback.)

On Graham’s show, Charlie told a story about how Donald Trump gave him what he claimed were expensive platinum diamond Harry Winston cufflinks as a gift, which turned out to be cubic zirconia knockoffs. That sounds about right. I expect when Trump gets word of this he’ll just deny ever meeting Charlie. Here are some quotes and you can see the video below:

About five years ago, I was at a dinner with my ex-wife Brooke [Mueller] and her family and this and that, and about halfway through I noticed Donald staring at my watch. And so he started saying, ‘Listen… I’m sorry that I can’t make your wedding,’ and I was [thinking], I didn’t invite you. So he says, ‘But I want to give you an early wedding gift as a gesture from me and Melania.’ And she doesn’t say a word. She’s very sweet and very pretty, but just kind of sits there, ya know?

[Trump] says, ‘These are platinum diamond Harry Winston,’ and he pulls off his cuff links and he gives them to me. And so I’m like, ‘Oh gosh, Mr. Trump, you really shouldn’t do this,’ and he goes, ‘No, no, it’s the least I can do.’

So smash-cut to about six months later, I have some jewelry getting appraised at the house and she finished and was leaving, and I said, ‘Oh yeah, you know there’s a couple other pieces I have that I’m very curious about. Would you mind appraising these?’” said Sheen. “She said, ‘Oh, what are they?’ I explained the dinner, this and that, these are from Donald Trump, Harry Winston, flawless Ds, platinum. She took the loupe, spent about four seconds, and kind of recoiled from it—much like people do from Trump.

So [the appraiser] says, ‘In their finest moment, these are cheap pewter and bad zirconias.’ And they’re stamped ‘Trump.’ And I just thought, ‘What does this really say about the man? That he said this is a great wedding gift, and it’s just a bag of dogsh*t?

Is that the laughter I can hear coming across the pond at our country about this charlatan?

I have faith, that good and decent people will make the right choice and the circus will leave town before it contaminates the Oval Office.

[From The Graham Norton show, via The Daily Beast]

You would think these two would be natural allies. Charlie isn’t known for his veracity either, but this is probably true. There are more pressing reasons to not vote for Trump other than just the fact that he lies all the time, but that’s just indicative of his character.

After that Graham asked Charlie abut his 2011 breakdown. Charlie said he was ashamed of it but claimed that it was all due to being sick of his job. “I just think I got so tired of saying somebody else’s words and being told how to say them that I decided… to write my own script, you know?”

No, he was heavily addicted to and abusing drugs. That was an addict in the throes of addiction, not a guy having a Jerry Maguire moment. Charlie also claimed that he didn’t learn he had HIV until later and that had nothing to do with his 2011 antics. He claimed that he no longer does drugs and that he still drinks but that he “sips.”

Speaking of Charlie’s HIV diagnosis, he’s said that “now I genuinely feel like I’m part of something important. It was not my intention to become the face of HIV and AIDs but there’s been nobody else.” Again, No.

Charlie has a new interview with The Sun (link has topless photo and is NSFW), where he claims that he only had sex without condoms twice and that’s how he contracted HIV. According to his ex-fiance he was having sex with her without condoms well after his diagnosis and he never told her he had HIV. Also, a Madam told Page Six a while ago that Charlie would pay more to have unprotected sex prior to his diagnosis. Charlie is now promoting a new condom line. I wish I was making that up.

Update: Radar Online reports that a new documentary of Sheen will air on Reelz this Saturday. It will contain audiotapes from The National Enquirer in which Sheen admits having unprotected sex after his HIV diagnosis and not informing his partner. Charlie also reportedly backtracked on his claim that he’s informed all of his sexual partners of his HIV status. During his “Evening With Charlie Sheen” event, he admitted not telling some partners, but insisted he still used protection. “The only times I didn’t tell them, was because the last 25 times they used it against me, and used my medical condition for their own folly, and financial gain.” A criminal investigation into Sheen is reportedly underway.

Photos credit: GoumbaJohnny.com and WENN